Author's Notes: hey guys! wow, long time, ne? sorry about that! i haven't updated for various reasons: a) internet breakdown, b) being busy, c) life... haha, bad excuses, but i'm sorry! i haven't been ignoring anyone! i especially want to thank Lady Battousai for her consistant persistance and undying loyalty, this chappie's for you!!!
Disclaimer: "dis-" coming from the latin prefix, "to disagree" and "claim" meaning "to say that something is true or is a fact, although you cannot prove it and other people might not believe" and "-er" being the suffix that allows the word "disclaimer" to be a noun. Thus forming the word, "disclaimer." Wow.
------------chap. 11 - the battousai"WHAT?!" Misao screamed, apparently unamused at whatever joke Himura was pulling, "How can you forget your own WIFE?! What kind of SICK, DEMENTED JOKE IS THIS HIMURA?!"Kenshin remained quiet, and Misao had to admit, Kenshin did have the kind of expression on his face that would imply that he very well didn't know who Kaoru was. Misao almost believed him for a split second before shaking her head roughly and continued to yell, "WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU?!"
"Shut up."
Misao automatically went quiet, stunned at the calm and uncaring tone that had escaped Himura's lips. It was one thing for him to forget who Kaoru was, and it was another thing for him to be rude, but it was a completely different thing for him to have that quality in his voice, especially in a time like this. What was happening to him...?
"Kenshin...are you alright...?" Misao whispered quietly.
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Kenshin's face and tone remained completely calm and coherent, unsure of who this teen was talking about. Kaoru... He rolled the name in his mind around a bit, thinking hard on the matter. He couldn't exactly recall anyone he knew by that name...but there was another part of him that knew the person and the name well. And that she was an important person to him.
But up to a certain point, his memories just couldn't come together. After that, they seemed to loose all sense and logic, like the swirling grains of sand tossed in the unpredictable wind. There were small glimpses and fragments, but the whole puzzle just refused to fall into place.
"Kenshin!"
Kenshin looked up and saw a tall man dressed in completely in white stand at the door of the cabin, his hand readjusting the red bandana on his forehead. Next to him, Kenshin saw an aristocratic woman dressed in an elaborate kimono, a worried expression plastered on to her face.
He stared up at the group before him, trying to piece two and two together. But it wouldn't piece, it wouldn't work. The spikey-haired man he knew he could trust, both as a friend and as an ally. The woman he knew had helped him in many situations, and he owed a lot to her.
The teenager in a skimpy ninja outfit...he could trust her...to a certain extent.
But even as he put together these small details, he couldn't recall their names, or where he was. Nor why.
A blacked-haired man waltzed into the room with a boy dressed in yellow and brown by his side, his expression unreadable. Kenshin spotted the Kodachi poking out of his trenchcoat, and without thinking, his hand automatically went to his sword around his waist, a hard, solid grip grasping its hilt, crouching into an offensive stance. He did not unsheath it, but he kept a tight clasp on it, knowing that this man could pose a threat. Just from the looks of it, Kenshin knew he was a skilled swordsman, and would be a strong and formidable opponent if he were ever to go up against him. But somewhere in the back of his mind, Kenshin knew that he could trust this man; there seemed to be no hostile aura around him. Just as he was about to loosen his hold on his Sakabato, the spikey- haired man in white grabbed Kenshin by the collar and hauled him two feet into the air,
"KENSHIN! What's wrong with you?! Why they HELL don't you give a DAMN about what's happened to Kaoru?!"
"Put me down."
Sano blinked slowly; the tone of Kenshin's voice had no anger in it, but was said in a way that would make it horribly unwise to refuse. Slowly, Sano lowered Kenshin to the ground, loosened the grip on Kenshin's clothes, and warily took a couple steps back. What the hell's goin' on...?
Kenshin gazed at the group in front of him, a certain level of recognition and consciousness in his eyes. But it was also plain to see that to an extent, Kenshin didn't know who they were.
"Kenshin! C'mon, you've gotta snap out of it!" the boy yelled, a look of frustration on his face.
Kenshin's brows furrowed, and the cloudy confusion in his head thickened, trying to remember...
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"Kaoru!!" Misao chirpped merrily to her bed-stricken friend, "How's the headache? Better?"
Kaoru's face still seemed a bit flushed, but she nodded, replying, "Yes, it's much better now. Sheesh, I don't know what's going to be worse, the nine months of pregnancy or the actual labor!" Kaoru laughed nervously, trying to lighten the mood, but her constant worry over Kenshin kept her mind far from carefree.
Misao sensed the uneasiness in Kaoru's mind, and attempted to distract her, "Hey, how about we get some fresh air? Let's go up on deck! Maybe we can visit the captain and ask to see how the boat works! Like I don't know, in the engine room or whatever it's called."
Kaoru paused for a slight moment, residing on the thought before she agreed by putting a strained smile on her face and dragging herself out of bed. With a bit of Misao's help.
Up on deck, there was a small drizzle. Rain. It hadn't stopped in days. Kaoru began to wonder when it ever would stop. When all this greyness and blackness would come to a halt, and the beautiful sun would shine again. But maybe it was useless to dream...
Misao had brought a pastel pink umbrella with her, holding it above both of their heads, protecting them from the light rain; delicate and detailed cherry blossoms were expertly painted onto its surface. When would she smell the cherry blossoms again...?
Making their way around the stern of the ship, they spotted Megumi and Sano, deeply engrossed in a profound conversation. Sano turned away from Megumi, a look of sweet sorrow on his face, but both girls let out a small, surpressed giggle when Megumi placed her hand on his cheek and kissed him. Sano was clearly surprised, but he deepened the kiss, and Kaoru and Misao found it better to take the longer route to the captain's steering.
"Awww, wasn't that so sweet?!" Misao exclaimed when they were out of earshot.
Kaoru nodded in agreement and noted, "It's about time too, those two have been lovesick puppies for so long, and if they hadn't gotten a move on themselves, I would've done something myself."
Misao giggled, and thought about how Sano and Megumi had been denying and ignoring their own feelings as well as the other's for so long. It was really cute at times, the way they argued so "lovingly," but Misao had to admit, it was annoying that they didn't do something. Kaoru was right...it was about time.
"Kinda like you and Aoshi..." Kaoru murmured, half to Misao, half to herself.
"What?!"
"OooOOOoooOO, I struck a nerve there, didn't I Misao?" Kaoru smiled brightly, and waved both of her hands in front of her, as if to dismiss the question altogether.
"If you weren't pregnant, Kaoru, I'd chase you through the ship then bonk you on the head!" Misao joked.
Kaoru smiled slyly, and opened her mouth to mention Misao and Aoshi's relationship when suddenly a small dart struck her neck.
Kaoru's pupils dilated, then shrunk, her eyes almost an empty, pearly white. Misao gasped, frozen to the spot with shock and fear. And before she could scream or react altogether, there was a swift blur of a human figure, and within seconds, Kaoru was gone.
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Misao clenched her throwing knives in her hands, cursing madly under her breath at her clumsiness, and knowing all to well that it was too late. How could she have just stood there? How the hell could she have been so careless...?
Her heartbeat was painfully loud in her chest, and she could have sworn that anyone would have been able to hear it. She had to tell Kenshin...
Without thinking, she dropped the umbrella on the deck and ran. With her long braid flipping behind her in the wind, she ran as fast as she could.
The umbrella lolled on its side awhile in the dripping rain, before coming to a stop when a miniscule throwing knife pierced its fabric, a sturdy roll of parchment tied to its tip.
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Millions of thoughts and possibilities ran through her mind like a train careening down a hill. All this running through her head while she continued to sprint towards Himura and Aoshi-sama's cabin. She spotted Sano and Megumi and only ran past them as they stared after her in disbelief. Who would run at breakneck speed on the slippery deck?
"Misao, what's wrong?" Megumi asked at Misao's running figure.
"Kaoru! Gone! Need tell! Kenshin!" Misao's fragmented sentences came in huffs as she tumbled towards the narrow stairs towards the lower deck cabins.
Who would kidnap Kaoru? Numerous things went through Misao's mind before she cursed loudly at herself for her absentmindedness. Who else would it be?! Damn, she needed to get her thinking straight. For damn's sake, who else were they chasing after?! What was his name...?!
"ARGH!" Misao yelled through gritted teeth, her frustration level hitting its highest.
Gensou! That was it! Shit, but how could he even kidnap her when they were even in the middle of the sea?! For the uncountable time that day, Misao cursed again, and told herself that she should've looked for any boats or rafts before making the run down to tell Kenshin.
But he would want to know first.
She just hadn't counted on him forgetting Kaoru.
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Kaoru... Through the thick chaotic feelings he was experiencing now, Kenshin felt the emotions that were tied with this name. Love, true happiness, contentment, fulfillment...and then there were worries, pain...loss... It was much like the feelings he had experienced when Tomoe died. His curiosity desperately wanted to remember this Kaoru, but at the same time, scared to reopen old wounds.
"Where am I?" he whispered softly.
Sano took a breath before responding, "We just left from the Tokyo city harbor, we're on our way to Kyoto."
Kyoto. Kenshin should be there. For different reasons that he could not place his finger on. But, the other city name...
"Tokyo?" The name was unfamiliar and yet, importantly familiar.
Aoshi stared at Himura for a moment before guessing what Kenshin was searching for, "Tokyo is the new name for Edo."
'Hold on...' Sano thought, 'If Kenshin knows the old name for Tokyo, and not the new one, then that means that he's forgotten his Kenshin Himura side! He's just lost a decade of recent memories after rediscovering his old ones. Shit, that means...I'm not talking to Kenshin Himura, I'm talking to the Hitokiri Battousai! Damn, I'm lucky he didn't slice me into a million pieces when I grabbed him...! Well, that must mean that he...kind of...remembers...us...'
But yet, the look on Kenshin's face didn't imply that he remembered.
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In the rush that Kaoru had been swept away into, her hair came undone from its tight-knotted ribbon, raven hair waterfalling past her shoulders as she was carried away. The navy silk ribbon fluttered in the wind, before laying to rest on the throwing knife near the pink umbrella.
Pools of water puddles gathered around the umbrella, water soaking through the threads of the ribbon and slipping down the slick surface of the throwing knife. The drizzle soon turned into a thudding rain, drops heavily splattering onto the boat's upper decks.
Megumi dragged Sano over to where she assumed Misao and Kaoru were standing moments before. She lowered her iris-decorated umbrella to pick up the damp ribbon and attempt to pull out the throwing knife, finding that it was stuck in too far for her strength to pull it out. She clenched her teeth, but turned to the smirking Sano who pulled the knife out with ease, holding it so Megumi could untie the small roll of parchment.
She unrolled it and kept a monotonous expression on her face as she read through it. Rolling it back up, she nodded towards Sano, both understanding the conversation they were having without words. There were no need for words.
Handing her umbrella to the fighter, she picked up the pastel-pink umbrella and closed it.
With nothing said between them, they followed the panicking Misao to Kenshin.
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Kaoru. Such an important person to Kenshin, and yet he could hardly remember her name. Megumi vaguely wondered if it were possible for him to remember. Perhaps he just needed something, a reminder of her. This made things all the more complicated since Kaoru was gone, and there was almost nothing that could help Kenshin remember.
He's remembering and forgetting...forgetting and remembering...he doesn't know where it starts and ends, begins and stops...
Suddenly, Megumi remembered the damp ribbon she had that she had found on the upper decks near Misao's umbrella. Unfurling it, she approached Kenshin hesitantly, not wanting to get on the Battousai's bad side. It was amazing that the Battousai was even apart of Kenshin.
"Ken-san..." Megumi whispered softly, "Please remember..." Gently, she took Kenshin's right hand and tied the wet, silk ribbon around his arm, hoping that he would, to some degree, recognize it.
Kenshin gazed at the damp cloth around his arm and his eyes widened as memories flowed back to him. It was a trecherous current that struck him as hard as a sword's blow. Breathless, he felt his scars bleed as ferociously as ever as imperceptible scenes crashed as hard as the thudding drops of rain. Sano, Aoshi, Misao, Megumi, Yahiko...Kaoru... But there was more. Blood baths, and full moons of revolution. Dead victims, rivers of blood...going into hiding....Tomoe....
Scenes flashing, beginning and ending as soon as it had come. And suddenly, a memory came back to him, the memory that had started this living Hell...
----- "I want to forget...everything in my past..." Kenshin said quietly. Suddenly his striking violet eyes went wide, not believing that he had actually agreed to her folly request. What was she going to do anyways? What power did a child have?
As if in answer, the girl smirked and her eyes glowed. Glowed a ferocious gold that shimmered and shone, nearly blinding Kenshin as he put his hands up to shield his eyes. Her heavy black hair had begun to rise, forming a halo around her petite head. Kenshin noticed the noise of the market faded away, as did the rest of the visible world. The only people seemingly left in the world were Kenshin and this little girl. Kenshin's surroundings were pitch black, save for the spotlight-like light that illuminated the young girl, still sitting on the same stool.
The girl seemed to be in a trance, staring at nothing, but suddenly her head jerked upward, eyes boring into Kenshin's mind. Kenshin gasped, pain flowing through his head, images flashing before his eyes. His whole life...starting from present and working its way backwards. Every detail. It was as if it were an open book, and the girl was reading it, scrutinizing it, tearing out the pages that were unnessecery, pages that were filled with despair and pain. Filling in needed pages, adding and editing. Her eyes dimmed a bit as she finished up and whispered hauntedly, "Kenshin Himura, the Battousai no more..." Her hoarse voice dimmed away, and Kenshin opened his eyes, the pain had passed, and felt the darkness sink away, replaced with the regular hustle of the market. The tent was no longer there, instead stood an empty space. -----
When it was all over, Kenshin found himself on his knees, his shoulders violently shuddering at the emotional turmoil that wracked his mind, his eyes shut tight. No tears flowed, for he wasn't sure he knew how to cry anymore. This was beyond tears.
He could remember and forget just as easily as that. As easy as a flash of light. Subtle memories that could come and fade as quickly as the setting sun. What would he know what to believe or think? If he couldn't remember who anyone was, how was he to make sure no one would get hurt?
Lingering memories remained in his mind as he attempted to shut out what he could, distancing himself from anything and everything.
He winced slightly as a warm, gentle hand was placed on his shoulder.
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Yahiko didn't understand what was completely going through Kenshin's head. He couldn't even understand what was going through his own head. This whole time Yahiko had always felt like he had never really been apart of anything. Just a stupid kid getting dragged into a "big ordeal" that he was assumed to not know about. He was "too young." But what was happening to Kenshin wasn't something he deserved...was it?
But as Kenshin's calm face turned into confusion, Yahiko began to worry about him. How could he forget Kaoru? The first most important person in his life? Kenshin was playing no joke, Yahiko knew that. This was Kenshin after all.
However, Yahiko felt powerless and useless as Megumi tied Kaoru's ribbon around Kenshin's wrist, and could only watch as Kenshin seemed to go into a state of shock, his eyes widening and his pupils shrinking, his face reflecting far more emotion that could be comprehended. He's remembering...
Yahiko could hardly hear the gasp coming from his own mouth as Kenshin slumped onto the floor on his knees, sweat pouring down his face. Blood flowing from the two scars that were marked on his face far long ago. How could they bleed now? Yahiko involuntarily stepped back a few strides, and could not fight the sick sensation swimming in his stomach. But yet, as whatever Kenshin was experiencing in his mind ended, Yahiko wanted to let Kenshin know that, whether it be commited sins or deemable accomplishments, Yahiko still looked up to him as a hero, and to a certain extent, a father.
And so, he hesitantly took a few steps forward, wanting to comfort Kenshin, but not fully knowing how. Pitifully, he placed his hand on his shoulder, wanting to take his suffering away and end the pain. And without warning, he stepped in front of Kenshin and flung his arms around Kenshin's neck, hoping, praying that everything would turn out alright.
"What's wrong Kenshin...?" Yahiko's muffled words could barely be heard, as his face was buried in Kenshin's shoulders.
"Yahiko..."
Yahiko pulled himself from Kenshin, and looked at Kenshin's face, seeing a clear consciousness in his eyes. Kenshin remembered. He remembered everything.
Kenshin remained quiet and detached from the rest of the world, despite the recognition he had. Cold sweat still clung to his skin, and the painful expression pasted on his face shrouded the true thoughts in his mind.
Megumi sighed, and stared at the parchment in her hand from the throwing knife. Kenshin didn't need the extra burden of what the message had to say, but Megumi felt a slight obligation; that Kenshin had the right to know what had happened to Kaoru. Tentavely, she stepped forward, and handed Kenshin his fate.
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