"Well..." Tanqueray was clearly thinking deeply, Jori thought, "he'll have to stay at my house..."
Or not... "What?!"
"I know it sounds insane, but it's not. Really. See, my mom's gone for the week, and you have a bunch of people, and..."
"Hmmm... Ok. But after that?"
"I really have no idea. Maybe he'll poof back?"
"Unfortunately, that might be best...."
"Yeah. Well, better get him out of here."
"How?"
Tanqueray's eyes took on a wicked gleam. "Why, incessant poking, of course!"
Jori looked skeptical. And worried about her friend's mental health.
Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Javert blinked, then realized his eyes were closed. Opening them, he repeated the procedure. Still aware of a strange, rhythmic sensation at his ribs, he took a quick glance down. It was that blonde creature again, poking away at the poor Inspector (first class) like there was no tomorrow. It hadn't been a dream. He might have suspected Absinthe, if he ever engaged in such things. A bad batch of snuff, perhaps? The sight (and sound) of yet another of those horrible machines tearing past dispelled that thought. Sighing, he slapped the ...girl's... hand away. She looked absolutely scandalized, her eyes filling with tears, her delicate mouth twisted into a pout of colossal proportions. Her companion looked ready to fly at him. He prayed the girl wasn't armed.
Now, Javert, as we can well imagine, had had little positive contact with females. Or crying people. Or crying females. Who he needed to comfort. Therefor, he was at something of a (total, utter and complete) loss, for once in his life. He glanced at the river. The girl's companion looked fairly fast. He blinked again. They were still there, still staring at him, still expectant. As a last resort, he fished deeply into his sodden coat, withdrew his (mercifully waterproof) snuffbox, extricated a pinch, and inhaled. Deeply. Nothing happened. The girl began to sob. Noisily. Passersby began to gaze over with alarm, and Javert still didn't know what to do. With a roll of her eyes, the other girl leaned over, whispered to her bawling friend, and patted her briefly on the head. The girl nodded, evidently pleased. An evil look crossed her face, one Javert had seen many, many times in his career. He had never gotten used to it.
"You," she said, torturously slow, "are coming with me."
This was the last thing he could possibly have ever expected the girl to say. He glanced at the companion. She, too, looked resolute.
"I...what?"
Shaking her head as if the statement had made an ounce of sense, and didn't he know it?, the girl carried on. "You see, it's the only thing that makes an ounce of sense. You need somewhere to stay. Jori's house is crowded. I'm all alone with the cats and pigs, for the whole week. La!"
"Cats? Pigs?! This gamine is insane!" Too late, he realized he had said it out loud.
"Indeed, and well aware of it." She offered him a hand. "I'm Tanqueray. This is Jori. Do you know your name?"
At least she knows she's crazy... "Of course I do! I am...Javert!"
For some totally inexplicable reason, both girls fell about in hysterics. He shrugged, lightly. It appeared he was stuck with these two, at least for now. Having never been anything but practical, Javert mentally accepted this bizarre fate.
"Fine. I accept. I should like some dry clothing, and a little food would not be too amiss." He reached to straighten his hat, but it wasn't there. The girl who called herself 'Tanqueray' had taken possession of it, fondling it as if it were a kitten. With a slight grimace, Javert extended his hand with a slight cough. Reluctantly, the girl passed the hat, and watched him settle it in its accustomed position.
"Right. Guess we'll have to catch a bus... Um, Jorver - Uh, Jori?"
Javert blinked, but didn't comment.
"Ya?"
"Do you have any money? I have about $20, that's it."
"Yeah, I have about the same. How come?"
"We're gonna have to get him some clothes."

Next: Shopping with Javert!!! Might have some random cameos from other characters. (Oh, don't worry people, you'll all be in here... Ah hah ha ha ha!!!!)