Home Movies: A LOTR Fanfic

Summary: (Prequel to 'Our Wild Middle Earth'). Electricity was recently installed in Middle-Earth, and this made video cameras, TVs, phones, etc. all availible to the citizens. When Aragorn gets a video camera for his coronation, he uses it to tape everything.

Disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings.

Chapter 1

"What's this?!" a confused and excited Aragorn asked as he opened the box.

"It's a video camera," Legolas answered. "Top of the line." He smiled. "It's a little gift for your coronation."

"Aww, thanks mellonamin (my friend)," Aragorn said. "How does it work?"

"Uhhh.....I don't know," Legolas said. "Ada (father) bought it and told me to give it to you. I have no idea what it is or what it does, but I thought you could figure that out."

"Yeah, sure, Legolas," said Aragorn, and he rolled his eyes. "I'll ask Gandalf if he knows what to do."

Aragorn walked into the other room where Gandalf was sleeping on the couch. Aragorn tapped him on the shoulder.

"Stop in the name of the Valar!" Gandalf exclaimed when he was woken. He looked up. "Oh, Aragorn, it's only you. I'm sorry."

"Yeah...anyway, I just wanted to ask you if you know how to work this thing," Aragorn said, holding up the video camera. "Legolas doesn't know, and I can't figure it out."

Gandalf sat up and took the camera. "Hmmm," he began, stroking his beard. "I'm afraid I don't know either. But maybe if I try a spell, it will work."

He set the camera on an end table and picked up his staff. "Tula kuila, aiya templa (come alive, oh magic).....video camera," Gandalf said, and pointed his staff at the camera. They waited a few moments, but nothing happened.

"Oh well, I tried," Gandalf said, shrugging his shoulders. "I've got to get some more sleep." He laid back down on the couch. "Good night!"

Aragorn picked up the camera and walked back into the room where Legolas was. "He didn't know," said Aragorn.

"Oh," Legolas said. He was in the middle of applying some more eyeliner and mascara. "Too bad."

"Legolas, you're not helping," said Aragorn. "Now I'll never be able to use the present that you gave me!"

"Aragorn, we'll get it to work, okay?" said Legolas reassuringly.

"Okay," Aragorn said. "But you better get it working within the next few days."

"Why?" Legolas asked.

"Because my wedding is on Saturday! (A/N: It's Wednesday.)" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Sorry, I forgot," Legolas said. "I guess I'll have to cancel my spa appointment for this weekend. Darn it!" He went over to the phone that was sitting on the table and dialed the spa's number.

"Hey Mandy! How ya doin'? Good, good. I've got bad news. Yes, very bad. No, I didn't dye my hair black. And no, I didn't shave my head." He laughed. "I have to cancel my appointment for Saturday. Yeah, my friend's gettin' married. Yeah, I had forgotten. Guess what? He didn't even make me the best man! I know! Ripoff!" Aragorn heard this and gave Legolas a nasty look. Legolas ignored him and kept on talking. "Yeah, he's marrying Arwen. Yes, she's the chick with that amazing dark hair, those beautiful blue eyes, and those gorgeous lips. And she's got a hott butt!"

Aragorn heard this loud and clear and raced over to Legolas. "Hey! I'm the only one who can say anything like that about Arwen!" he exclaimed. He jumped on Legolas and tackled him to the ground.

"Yeah Mandy, I've gotta go! Talk to ya soon!" Legolas said, and Aragorn grabbed the phone out of his hand.

"I hate you Legolas!" Aragorn yelled, wrapping his arm around Legolas' throat.

"Hey, come on, old pal! I was just kidding!" said Legolas. "Now get off of me!"

"NO!" yelled Aragorn, and he began to punch Legolas. Legolas hit him equally as hard in return.

At that moment, Arwen walked into the room.

"What the-" she began, and she rushed over to them. "What are you doing?"

They stopped the punching and looked at Arwen. "Hi, honey!" Aragorn said. "What...what are you doing here?"

"Well, let's see, I'll be the Queen soon, and I will be living here, so I think I have the right to be in this palace!" Arwen said sarcastically. "What are you doing here?"

"I was just beating the crap out of Legolas!" Aragorn exclaimed.

"Why?" Arwen asked, puzzled.

"Because I said that you shone with the radiance of a million suns, and that you are the most beautiful being to walk this earth, and that none of us are worthy enough for someone as amazing as you," Legolas recited poetically.

Arwen was captivated by what he was saying, but snapped out of it when she realized it was Legolas. "Eww! Legolas! Stop it, you pervert!" she yelled. "The only person who can say that to me is Aragorn!"

"Finally! Someone sees my point!" Aragorn said. He looked at Arwen again. "May I continue?"

"Yes you may, your majesty," Arwen said, smiling, and walked away.

"Now where were we.....I know!" said Aragorn, and he continued punching Legolas.

That Saturday, Aragorn was finished getting ready and was sitting in his chambers. He glanced over at the corner and saw that the video camera was sitting there, put back into its box.

He walked over and took it out. After examining it and all of the buttons, he flipped out the little screen and hit the button labeled 'Power'. After it made a little noise, he thought it might be on. So, he hit the 'Record' button and saw a little red light go on.

"Wow....." he began. He was amazed by the way that whatever he looked at showed up on the little screen. "Cool.....I've gotta use this at the wedding."

He took the cameraand went to the courtyard, where the wedding was being held. He gave the camera to a guard who was sitting in the front row and showed him how to work it. He told the man to film the entire wedding.

Aragorn stood at the altar and waited for Arwen. All of the guests had finished filing in, and they were waiting for her to come.

Aragorn was sweating alot from nervousness, and kept wiping the sweat from his forehead. The guard was filming him and laughing at the way he fidgeted. Aragorn saw him filming him and gave him a mean look.

"Hey! Don't film me yet! Wait for Arwen!" Aragorn hissed. The guard laughed and kept rolling. "I said stop! Stop!" The music began before Aragorn could attack the guard, and Arwen and Elrond appeared at the end of the aisle.

They began to walk up the aisle. Arwen saw Aragorn at the altar and smiled at him. Next to him stood Elladan and Elohir, who were both best men, because nobody could pick between them.

Legolas was sitting on the end of a row, and when Arwen passed, he said, "...you shine with the radiance of a million suns... you are the most beautiful being to walk this earth...and none of us are worthy enough for someone as amazing as you..."

Arwen heard him and gave him a swift kick in the leg with her pointy shoes.

"Owee!" Legolas shrieked. He began to cry, and ran out of the wedding. Everybody had watched him, but their attention now focused to the wedding.

After Elrond had given Arwen to Aragorn, the ceremony began. It was now time to exchange rings. Aragorn turned to Elladan and Elohir, who each had a ring. They fumbled around in their pockets for a few moments and came out empty handed.

Aragorn felt his face turn red, and looked at Arwen. He mouthed to her that the rings were missing, and her jaw dropped.

"Where are they?" she whispered.

"I don't know!" Aragorn said quietly.

Just then, Legolas appeared at the end of the aisle. He walked slowly up to the altar and reached into his pocked. Out came the two rings. He put them in Aragorn's hand and said, "I stole the rings! I was jealous that you didn't pick me as best man, and I was mad that you beat me up the other day."

"Legolas, I'm sorry," Aragorn said. "I shouldn't have done that to you. Now why don't you have a seat in the front row and enjoy this day with us."

Legolas scanned the front row. "But there's no seats left!" he said.

A beautiful Elf-maiden smiled at him. "You can share a chair with me," she said slyly.

"Gotta go!" Legolas exclaimed. He raced to the Elf's chair and sat down with her.

"This is great stuff," the guard said to himself as he continued to film the wedding. "Great stuff."