Chapter 13

This Just In: Watching Tv Can Be Hazardous To Your Health

"Zap!" "Ow!" Remy groaned and rubbed his soar arm.
"Stupid devil ring," he muttered.
He quickly picked up the remote and switched the channel.

"This week at Victoria's Secret, all lingerie is 50 off!" "Zap!" "Ow!" He flipped the channel again.
"Ok ladies, it's time to work on those butts. We're going to bend, touch the floor, and then slowly pull ourselves back up to the upright position. Ready? Go!"

"Zap!" "Ow!" "Click." "Looking for a steamy romance? Call our dating hotline at…" "Zap!"

"OW! For the love of God!" "Click." "Coming up next on PBS. National Geographic…" Remy let out a sigh of relief.
"Finally, somethin' Remy can watch."

"Today on National Geographic, Nudist camps. What they are and the people who live in them.
"ZAP!" "Crap! Freaking ring!" He angrily turned off the television.

He sighed in frustration and commenced to pout.
"Remy can't do nothin' wit dis ring on. Remy can't go to de pool. Remy can't go to no clubs. Remy can't even watch respectable tv!" "What are you in here whining about, honey?" Remy looked up at his friend at Sophia.

"Zap!" "Ow! Sophia!" "What?" asked the bikini clad girl with a small smirk on her face. "I just wanted to ask if you wanted to go to the pool with me and Rogue.
Remy covered his eyes.

"What you talkin' bout going to a pool. We got one right here." Sophia smiled evilly.
"Yeah but all we've got here is boys. We're going looking for some men!" "What!?" he shouted.
He took his hand from over his eyes.
Sophia shrugged.

"Rogue wouldn't go to a public pool. She could touch somebody!" Sophia smirked at him.
"Who said anything about swimming, honey?" Remy felt jealousy rush through his veins at the mere thought of other guys checking her out.
"You don't have a problem with that do ya Remy?"

Remy gritted his teeth.
"No. Not at all," he answered through clenched teeth.
Sophia smirked at him.
"Good." She turned to walk off.

"Oh by the way Remy," she called over her shoulder. "You just spent a whole two minutes looking at me and you didn't get zapped." She laughed lightly and exited the room.
Remy growled jealously.
"Dis sucks!"

Later that evening

Rogue peered around the corner of the hallway wall into the rec room. Remy was sitting on couch. Or more correctly, Remy was slouching on the couch flipping aimlessly through the tv channels.
Rogue bit her lip to keep from laughing.
Behind her Sophia smiled.

"Didn't I tell you it would work?" she asked proudly.
Rogue turned around and nodded.
"But how do ya know all this stuff." Sophia shrugged.
"This is how ya keep your man at home and out of some other girl's arms."

Rogue frown slightly.
"But if he loves ya wouldn't that keep him home.
Sophia looked at her like she had said something in a whole different language.
After a couple seconds she just shrugged.
"If you say so honey…."

The word "gold-digger" popped into Rogue's head before it was quickly pushed out again.
"So now what do Ah do?" she question the more experienced woman.
Sophia rolled her eyes.
"You go talk to him. Take a lot, give a little."

"Something makes me think ya do that a lot." Rogue thought to herself.
"What are you waiting for?" asked Sophia. "Go talk to him!" Rogue peeked back around the corner and looked at Remy.
"He does look kind of sad." Sophia rolled her eyes again.

"Girl you sho do got a lot to learn." She mumbled.
"What?" asked Rogue, turning back around.
"Nothing." Rogue bit her lip.
"Alright, Ah'll go talk ta him."

She took a deep breath and walked into the room.
"Hey Remy!" she said a little loudly.
She sat down next to him on the couch.
"Hey," he mumbled without even looking away from the tv screen.
Rogue looked over at Sophia, who was still standing outside the door, and shrugged.

Sophia rolled her eyes and motioned for Rogue to keep going.
Rogue took another deep breath and continued.
"So…whatcha watching?" "Stuff." "Oh? Is it interesting?"

Remy shrugged.
"What show is this?" "I don't know." "What is about?" "Prairie Dogs."

"Prairie dogs?! Why ya watchin' some crap like this?!" Remy gritted his teeth and looked over at Rogue.
"Is dere something you is wanting or is you just deliberately trying to be annoying?!" Rogue was slightly startled by Remy's tone, but choose to ignore it.
"Well! Excuse me for being curious!" she said in a slightly teasing voice.

Remy muttered something in Cajun under his breath that Rogue couldn't quite catch.
Rogue could feel herself losing all patience. After all wasn't this all his idea in the first place?
Why was he being such a big baby?
"Ya know Remy, green isn't your color." Rogue whispered sarcastically, yet quietly.
It didn't matter. Remy still heard it.
"What?! Remy is soooo not jealous!" Rogue scoffed.

"Please. You are so too jealous! That's why you're being so mean ta me! I don't know why you are even acting like this! It was your idea to do this whole thing in the first place!
Remy opened his mouth to say something and then closed it.
He sighed.

"You're right chere," he agreed at last. "I was mean, jealous, and petty. It was Remy's idea ta do dis. And Remy's going to do it wit a good attitude. I'm sorry chere!" Rogue smiled slightly.
"It's ok Remy. I'm just glad that ya came to your senses!" Remy smiled and shook his head.

"Dat's right ma cherie. Remy has seen de light. Remy's not gonna be jealous no more!" Rogue smiled sneakily.
"Ya sure about that Remy?" The reformed Cajun shook his head.
"Cross my heart chere."

Rogue sighed in "relief." "Great! Then ya won't mind that ah have a date tomorrow." "A date?!" Remy practically yelled.
Rogue tipped her head to the side thoughtfully.
"Actually, Ah have two. But who's counting?"

Remy stared at Rogue. His mouth just hung open in shock.
Rogue giggled slightly.
"That's ok with ya, right Remy?" Remy managed to nod a yes.
"Great!" said Rogue happily.

She got up and stretched "Well better get to bed. Night Remy!" "Goodnight," he returned through clenched teeth.
Rogue waved and left the room.
Remy sighed and went back to slumping on the couch.

Back in the hallway, Sophia smiled to herself.
"Wow. She's really learning quickly," she thought to herself.
"Time to step up the game!"

Ok! Ok! Here's the next chapter. Stop sending hit-men to my house! You know who you are! )
You know what to do. Read and Review!