Summary: Valentine's Day. Love is in the air... and what kind of big brother would Joey be if he didn't keep an eye on his sweet, innocent sister? Of course, he'll need help. Seto/Joey... eventually. Follow-up to "To Seto, From Joey". Post Dungeon Dice Monsters AU in which Serenity recovered her eyesight earlier than expected.
Author's notes: Another month, another (short) chapter. Arrgh! Apologies for the slow, slow pace. I'll keep at it, though, no matter how long it takes! Oh, and Happy Canada Day to my fellow Canadians :)
FF.net no longer accepts underscores, tildes, asterisks, or Shift-6. How do I do Japanese smileys now?
Job search is going horribly. I'm sick and tired of printing off resume after resume, only to have them vanish into an abyss as if I'd never sent the stupid things in the first place. Nothing lowers morale like getting rejected again and again and again...
darkmus: Thanks for the extra luck! It looks like I need it :(
Kage Miko: Shounen-ai. I'm not hard-core enough to do yaoi... yet ;)
Lilianna: Hmm... maybe he shouldn't be hyperventilating, but, then again, he seems to be suffering from paranoia at the moment... You've probably gone away already, but here's the next chapter. On the bright side, you're probably back by now.
pisces071: Thank you :) As for how long, maybe sometime in the next two chapters?
Sarasusamiga: Kaiba took the upper arm belts off, but not the metal arm cuffs that he wears between the wrist and elbow. I don't know how to get those things off. There doesn't seem to be any, well, seams...
ShadowSpirit: Mmmm, chocolate!
Spazishness: I hope you're kidding...
Vampyric Saiyaness: Thanks! And, yeah, it is interesting how Joey managed to maneuver himself over the handrest. Perhaps he had a little help?
Yami Jazz: Awww, the bunny's so cute! Maybe I should carry the whole bunny to the interview, should I ever get that far in my job search. Personally, I don't see how just having the foot can be lucky. It didn't do the now-footless rabbit any good, now did it...
youko-moon: If the story's cut off, try refreshing the page, or emptying the browser cache and then refreshing. FF.net sometimes stops loading the page before it's actually done.
Yugi-Redwall-fan: Thanks! I'll have to save the cookies for later, though. I had my wisdom teeth out and it still hurts :(
Warnings: Occasional language. Occasional shounen-ai.
Disclaimers: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. And remember, kids, look both ways before crossing the street. No clothes were harmed in the making of this fic.
Chapter Eight: The Best-Laid Plans...
So here I am, faking sleep so I can buy enough time to figure out a way to get myself outta this mess. Kaiba's still got his arms around me and I've got my arms back around him so I don't fall off. After all, I don't really wanna slip onto the floor, and he's kinda, well, comfy, I guess, if I ignore the armor plating digging into my ribs. How can he stand those things? Don't his arms hurt after a while?
The way I figure it, I can do one of two things: "wake up" and get it over with, or just sit here until Kaiba wakes up, too. Because he's asleep. Because he has to be.
Yeah.
...The more I think about it, the dumber "he's asleep 'cause he's asleep" sounds.
I'm not stupid. I know it's doughnut logic or whatever the hell bad thinking that goes in circles is called. It's little kid "if I close my eyes it's not there" logic. Problem is, I'm not a little kid anymore. Plus, what's the big deal, anyway? I fell asleep, grabbed him, the end.
And he, uh, grabbed me back. Don't know why. Won't find out unless I smarten up.
Figuring that out is enough to make me look.
So I do.
I pull away just a little and look at him straight on, hoping for the best, expecting the worst.
And there he is, looking pretty damn surprised I'm awake. Of course he's awake, too. That's just the way Life is.
The movie soundtrack just doesn't do justice to what I'm going through right now.
So here we are, his arms still around me and mine still around him, and the world's still spinning, and the movie's still playing, and I'm still alive, and we're still staring at each other, trapped in our own little bubble of space and time.
Here we are, staring at each other, waiting for the other guy to break it off, look away, maybe even say something, in some weird game of Eyeball Chicken.
Screw it. I don't like waiting. "Kaiba."
He keeps looking at me, surprise wiped off his face and totally expressionless again. "Wheeler."
So far, so good. I try to keep my face as neutral as his. "What're you doing?"
He blinks a bunch of times, goes white, dumps me on the floor, flies over the seats, and disappears by the time I pry my ass off the sticky wet stuff on the theatre floor.
SuperKaiba: Faster than a speeding bullet, leaps past moviegoers in a single bound.
Well, I can do that too.
I elbow everybody outta my way as I go after him at top speed. They've already dropped their snacks and stuff thanks to Hurricane Kaiba, so it's not like I'm gonna make their day any worse. They do their best to wreck mine, though. I'll never get the ketchup off this shirt.
I take a quick look at Serenity before I head out the door. She's fine. The guys are still passed out in the seats and she's totally glued to the screen. Must've tuned out the whole room since she's still not looking this way or paying any attention to the screaming and yelling. Wow. Maybe I'll get her this movie when it comes out on video. Or not. I'm a better brother than that. The least I can do is get her a good movie.
Okay, he's not in the lobby. Not in the washrooms, either, men's or women's. Got a real good look of my clothes, though. And the ketchup and fry and crumb and popcorn stains on top of the soda and orange nacho cheese stains from my trip to the floor. Where is he, that good-for-nothing stuck up geek bastard jerk-
The car. Gotta check the car. I spin around and head for the exit. If he's there, I'm gonna kill him. If he's not there, I'm gonna kill him. If the car's not there, I'm gonna kill him, but real slow. Kaiba's a dead man. Yeah, I'm pissed. And I guess a little hurt, too. I would've got off his lap if he'd told me- done it on my own, I mean. Not like I would've just sat there all day or something. He didn't have to shove me off! Just a "Wheeler, get off my lap" would've done the trick, but he just had to make a big show of it and mess up everybody's Valentine's Day at the same time. Kinda weird of him to freak out like that, though. Really weird.
This is the last time I'm gonna let him mess around with my head like this. I knew something was up, knew it, but nooo, I didn't wanna push it and lose my ride. Didn't wanna set him off. Well, so much for that plan. At least I'll get some answers outta him now. If I can find him, that is.
Where's the car, where's the car... It's kinda dark out now, but I can still make out the blue sports car. 'Course, the street lights help.
And there he is, sitting in the driver's seat with the engine running. I run out in front of the car to the driver side window and hope he doesn't wanna get away so bad he runs me over. "KAIBA! OPEN THE DAMN WINDOW!" I holler. Can't yell at him if the window's shut, right?
For a second it looks like I'm gonna be Joey pancake, but Kaiba ends up rolling the window down. He glares at me before turning away. "Well? In case you're so stupid you can't tell the difference, the window is now open." Yup, that's the Kaiba I know. Too bad. I liked the other one better.
"What the hell do ya think you're doing, Kaiba?! " I yell at him. "You help me out, you act all nice at me, you buy me food, and then you drop me like... like I'm diseased or somethin'! What the hell's wrong with you?!" I pound the car roof with my fist. He drives me crazy. Crazy. I swear, one of these days, Yuugi's gonna find me in a straitjacket all because of Seto Kaiba. I grab him through the window and make him look at me. "I WANT ANSWERS, DAMMIT! YOU HEAR ME, KAIBA?!"
Kaiba tears his eyes away from mine, looking a little panicky, or as panicky as Kaiba ever looks. "Get in the car," he says under his breath.
"What?!"
"Get in the car!" he hisses. "Now, Wheeler!"
I finally notice the huge crowd that's pouring outta the movie theatre. Huge crowd. Tidal wave kinda crowd. The "looks like half of Domino and his girlfriend" kinda crowd.
They're all staring at us.
Right. In car good, not in car bad. Very, very bad.
So I dive in through the car window.
Kaiba swears at me as he pulls me the rest of the way in and rolls the window back up. "You idiotic, third-rate, pathetic excuse for a-"
I "accidentally" slam an elbow in his gut while I scramble off of him and into the other seat. "Hey, you said 'get in the car'!"
He rolls his eyes. "I know what I said! What I meant was, 'walk over to the passenger side door, open it, get inside, and close it,' not 'lunge at me through the window like some sort of rabid animal'!"
I hate him. "Well, sorry! I'm not psychic, ya know!"
"Obviously." He takes a deep breath and lets it out. Then he checks over his shoulder before easing out into traffic. "We're leaving."
Yeah, I never would've noticed that the car's moving. Duh. "But-"
He gives me a tight smile as his knuckles go white on the steering wheel. "Unless you want to wait until the reporters show up?"
Oh shit. I look behind us. The crowd... "Ohmygawd, Seto Kaiba and a guy?!" "Where's my cell? Hi, Jenny? You won't believe what I saw-" "You're kidding me!" "Some blonde, don't know who-" "Kids these days-" "-always thought he was gay." "Damn, that's a nice car..."
...Gay? Gay? Huh? What? Who's gay? He's gay? They think Kaiba's gay? Waitaminute, why'd they think he's gay? I play over that little scene outside the car again in my head and things go "click" and I figure out how it must've looked to, well, everybody, with me yelling my head off like some kinda... pissed off date. Yelling Kaiba's name.
I... oh man. I really, really screwed up this time. Yeah, yeah, he did too, but what I just did... I don't go around wrecking people's lives, ya know? This is... bad. Kaiba can fix it, though, right? I mean, he's Seto Kaiba. He'll just go on the news or something and clear this thing up, right? C'mon, he's Seto Kaiba. He's gotta be good at dealing with scandals and stuff 'cause, um, I never hear about 'em.
What if he can't? This kinda thing can cost you your job, even if it's not supposed to. Even if it's just a stupid rumor from a bunch of dumb people. Lots and lots of dumb people, and holy shit, how'd those reporters get there so fast?
Damn. Did I just flush Kaiba Corp. down the drain? Did I just ruin Kaiba's life? Mokuba's life? "...I... Kaiba... I..." I'm sorry.
He just keeps driving.