My mom always told me that I was too empathic. She said that after I cried my heart out while watching one of those commercials about the war and what kind of violence was going during that time. I was 10, so I basically had no idea what she meant.
She would always tell me, "Sara honey, if you don't grow some strong nerves, you'll get nowhere in life," in that raspy soft voice. I just passed it off as emotions getting the best of me, and I tried my best to cover my emotions, thinking it was that what she meant. My mother had noticed this and frowned upon it. "But that doesn't mean you have to run and hide." Was another favorite of hers.
I smiled. When I told her about my choice of career, she sighed and looked frustrated. "I sure hope you know what your doing..." But hoped me the best.
My mother. What can I say about her? I loved her, even though she was a freak and bit a of a dopey. She gave some great advice and some bad.
Can I blame her for me being so empathetic? No I can't, because she would also say, "Blame your darn wussy father for that dear, he's the one who cried and screamed during your birth!"
Ah, me being so empathetic. Sympathetic. Whatever rocks your boat. I used to remember having urges to go and save the world, while growing up. Then I eventually learned that there is nothing I can do to save everyone. I was also obsessed with Superman, believe it or not. I think because I was fascinated with the thought that someone out there was able to go and save people. And to be someone different, I may have related myself to him a couple of times...
Maybe it was my ability to subconsciously put myself in the victim's shoes that made me the way I am. My mother used to say another thing, she sure had alot to say even though she says she didn't, and it would go something along the lines of, "A ghost you sure are, for placing yourself into another's mind." She must have come up with that after a whole summer of reading Shakespeare.
But everything time she came up with something as ridiculous, I knew she was right. She was always right. I over-analyze things. From the very begining, to the very end. I see the world through the victims eyes, not my own. Makes you kind of wonder why I'm in this profession eh? If I want to do something to change the world, why become a CSI when all the victims are dead? I know why. Just like everybody else, I don't like to face the cold hard truth that nothing is perfect. From my job, I only see the dead victims, and don't have to deal with anything else.
But, that's just me talking.
'Over analyzing'.