Hermione awoke with the groggy-headed feeling that only seems to come from falling asleep in the day. There was a pounding noise, which at first she thought was in her head, then when it got louder, she realised, it was someone knocking the office door. The knocking stopped and was replaced by a voice, a voice that Hermione knew very well. She was frozen to the spot with fear and her heart began to race. The sudden realisation that she really shouldn't be there and that if she was caught, the consequences could be bad, made her panic.
She jumped up out of bed quickly, grabbing the sheet that Severus must have pulled over while she slept, panting and shaking like a leaf. Looking for somewhere to hide, she remembered the bathroom, ran towards it and put her hand on the spot on the wall that opened the door; but the door refused to open. Her belly felt like it was sinking to the floor and she started to feel dizzy. What the hell was she going to do? She decided to wake Severus and turned round, but he had already woken and had jumped out of bed. He put his fingers to his lips as the voice rang out again
"Severus...Severus? Are you there? You did not come to our meeting; it is most unlike you to forget. I have been calling you through the floo network to your fireplace and also got no reply. Severus, I know that you're in there...are you sulking again? Oh, this is ridiculous! I'm coming in!" the voice shouted through the door
They heard the door being blasted at with a wand, making a slight fizzing sound, then being opened.
Hermione looked at Severus desperately; he was busily trying to get dressed, but indicated the bathroom with his head.
Hermione put her hands out and shook her head to indicate that she could not get in and as soon as he saw these gestures he rushed over to open the door. The doorway appeared just as they heard Albus Dumbledore walking through the office towards the bedroom. Then Hermione saw her clothes being shoved through the doorway, while she stood behind the wall.
Severus..have you been sleeping, on a Saturday afternoon?" he asked, as he rounded the corner from the office to the still open doorway. Hermione had got into the bathroom just in time and heard his voice again as he entered the bedroom.
"Ahh...there you are! Did you fall asleep? It is not like you to forget an appointment!" he asked
"Yes, I stayed up late last night and I was tired, so I thought it would do me no harm to rest for a while, I apologise for keeping you waiting" Severus responded quickly
"No matter, but I did wonder where you were. Then I consulted my clock (like the one at the burrow) and it told me you were down here, so I thought I'd better come and see if anything was wrong" Albus said, in his usual friendly manner
Hermione heard the bed squeak as Severus sat down on it, presumably to put on his shoes, then silence for a while.
"Severus...is there something you'd like to tell me?" Dumbledore said in a voice that sounded half-amused and half-curious.
What was going on? Hermione's heart began pounding again and she thought, did he know?
"I...I don't know how that got there.."
Hermione had never heard her normally unflappable potions master, sound so nervous. Her heart sank, Severus must have left an item of her clothing behind by mistake and Dumbledore must have seen it.
"Well, it can't be yours, as I doubt that you would fit into it. It looks very modern, the sort of thing that might belong to a young lady..." there an audible gasp, as realisation hit, "Oh, Severus..you haven't, have you?" Dumbledore said in a worried tone
Severus didn't answer.
Tears sprang to Hermiones eyes and she leant back against the wall she had been hiding behind, looking up in resignation.
"You might as well come out now, whoever you are! The game is up!" Dumbledore called out, "I thought I felt the presence of another person when I came in, but I dismissed it at first, thinking it so unlikely" he continued
Taking a deep breath, Hermione emerged from the bathroom, the sheet wrapped tightly around her. She couldn't look at him, not wanting to see the look in the kindly headmaster's eyes, when he saw her.
There was an incredulous gasp as Dumbledore took in the sight of who was actually standing before him.
"Hermione?...You?..By Merlin!..I am totally at a loss of what to say!"
Hermione padded over to the bed and sat on it, her legs feeling shaky, still looking down.
She felt Severus sitting beside her, sighing heavily.
"Well, you two! I think an explanation is needed!" Dumbledore sounded unusually stern
"There is no excuse Albus, I...I gave in to my basest carnal desires, I let my emotions get the better of me. I will accept whatever you decide to do about it" Severus said, stiffly, sounding like a man resigned to his fate
"Severus..I would never have believed it of you...you are always so stoical! And as for you young lady! What have you got to say for yourself?"
Hermione bent her head even lower as she spoke
"I...I'm sorry! I know what we've done is against the school rules, but you're not going to sack Severus are you?" she sobbed, looking hopefully up at her headmaster.
"At the moment, I don't know what I am going to do. I would hate to lose a highly valued member of staff and as you know Hermione, a vitally important member of the order! If this got out it would do terrible damage to both the school and our efforts against Voldemort.
He looked down and pursed his lips as if thinking
"Is this the first time you have...erm?" he indicated the bed
"Yes, headmaster, the first and only time" Severus lied, his eyes only briefly flicking up at the headmaster
Hermione was shocked at how quickly and easily he had lied to Dumbledore. Could he lie that quickly and easily about or to anyone else, Hermione decided he probably could, after all he had been a deatheater.
"Well, in that case, I think we can overlook this as a one off mistake. Were you discreet Hermione, in coming here?" Dumbledore said, sounding calmer
"Yes, I came in Harry's cloak" Hermione assured him
"Hermione, I would like to speak to you alone for a moment, come into the office if you would" he asked briskly.
Hermione followed him out of the bedroom, wondering what he wanted. He bent down and spoke quietly, once they were out of Severus's earshot.
"Hermione, I need to ask" he paused, then carried on, "Was there any coercion on Professor Snapes part at all? Do not be afraid to tell me, it is alright," Dumbledore said kindly putting his hand on her lower arm and squeezing softly for a second
Hermione felt the immediate need to reassure him,
"No, no. No he didn't force me if that's what you're thinking, I wanted to do it as much as he did...we both wanted to" she answered, smiling at him, then looking down again, blushing a little ashamedly.
"That is a relief, but I am very disappointed with both of you. The fact that neither of you both highly intelligent individuals, thought about the consequences of your actions." He looked away then and walked back into the bedroom, where severus was now standing, his hands behind his back.
"Well severus, I do not know what led to this little episode, I do not wish to, I'm only glad I found out like this and not second hand after it had spread around the school!" Dumbledore spoke sternly
"However, I am not a man to judge others just for giving in to their emotions. Do you love each other?" he asked, looking from Hermione to Severus in turn
Hermione's heart leapt, perhaps her lover would at last, now, admit his true feelings for her. She spoke first however, as an encouragement.
"Yes Dumbledore, I do, I don't know quite when it happened, but I know now that I have fallen in love, I've never felt like this before, not with anyone" Hermione answered, all the time looking at Severus, who wouldn't look back. He kept avoiding her eyes.
"And you Severus?" dumbledore asked expectantly, "do you love Hermione?"
Hermione held her breath as she waited for him to speak. He looked at her briefly, then looked directly at Dumbledore.
"How I feel is of no consequence, the fact remains that I have committed an illegal act. I will understand completely if you would like me to leave, I will offer up no objection" Severus said, in his best potion masters voice.
Hermione's heart sank and she bowed her head low. Any hope she had of him admitting his feelings was slipping away. If he really felt love for her, wouldn't he want Dumbledore to know? After all it would at least give a good enough reason for what they did.
"Well Severus, under normal circumstances and if it had been maybe any other teacher, I may have considered dismissal, but...these are not normal circumstances and you are not just any teacher. I doubt very much that we could replace you easily and your presence here is essential as part of your work with the order. So, no I will not dismiss you, but I think some time away might do you both good." Dumbledore considered, then he asked, "the mission you are planning, could you start it early?" looking at Severus, questioningly
"Yes, I will have to make some arrangements, but I think it will be possible" answered the now stern faced Severus
"Hermione suddenly felt very uncomfortable dressed only in a sheet.
"Excuse me but I think I will go and get dressed" she said miserably, retrieving her bra off the bed. Then as she reached the doorway to the bathroom, she turned and asked, "Dumbledore, how long will he be going away for?"
"A few weeks I think, he is going on a reconnaissance mission to somewhere abroad, he needs to be completely cut off too, so no owls must be sent! His cover must stay intact at all times!" Dumbledore said looking at Hermione, over his glasses
Hermione merely nodded, she felt wretched, not only had the man she loved, practically dismissed her as meaning little to him, he was also going away. She got dressed, listening to them talk about sketchy details of the mission revealing little of anything use that Hermione could pass on to Harry. Then she heard the headmaster call out that he was leaving.
"I will go now and leave you two to alone, I expect you will have much to talk about" then he walked out, shutting the door behind him.
Hermione walked into the room, wiping the tears from her eyes. Severus was sitting on the bed, staring at the floor. She went over to him and laid her hand gently on his shoulder, holding it there for a few seconds. Then, on seeing no objection otherwise she slid her arm around his back and sat down next to him, leaning her head against his arm. They both sat there in silence for a while before Severus spoke
"I think our game is over Hermione, fate was always against us from the start, we gambled with it and lost. Now we must face the consequences of our actions, as Dumbledore said, like I have had to do many times before in my life" he said resolutely
"Please don't say that! We could still carry on in secret! I could be more discreet than ever before, this time no one would..." but Severus cut Hermione off before she could finish
"No, you must accept it. I think you had better go back to your friends where you belong. I would also very much appreciate you telling no one of our encounters, if you could" his tone was cold, but he still wouldn't look at her.
Hermione felt that something wonderful was slipping through her fingers, she desperately did not want that to happen
Kneeling in front of him, she held his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her.
"Just tell me you feel nothing for me and I will go now and never look back" she said hoping to call his bluff, desperately hoping that it would work.
He looked at her, his expression changing from sad to his usual cold, stoical one. But he still looked away as he spoke.
"Truthfully, I feel nothing for you. I enjoyed toying with you, you were an enjoyable diversion, a pleasant change from all the usual drones in this place, that is all. Now go and forget about me"
"I don't believe you! I know you feel for me! There's no way you could make love to me like that if I was just a plaything to you, you're just too afraid to admit how you feel that's all!" hermione almost screamed
Severus stood up then, holding on to her arm, taking her with him. He looked angry and gripping her arm even tighter, walked through the bedroom, right up to the door of the office
Before he opened it he looked at her and spoke, a familiar snarl curling his lip
"Silly, naïve girl! You know nothing of what I feel or what I am afraid of! Why can't you accept that it is over!" he ranted going to open the door, presumably to throw her out. But Hermione was too quick, just like she had all those weeks ago in the library, she reached up and kissed him. At first he was unresponsive, then gradually and much to her relief, she felt his arms slide slowly around her waist and his lips move along with hers. The kiss began to get more passionate, almost desperate, then suddenly Severus broke it off, pushing Hermione away at arms length. He looked down, then up again, all the previous anger gone
"This changes nothing Hermione, we still have to end this now, you understand that don't you?"
Hermione merely nodded, tears welling in her eyes again. She opened the door, but just as she was leaving she said
"What about when I leave school, would you consider us again? After all, there'll be nothing to stop us then"
"Hmmph! I think we will be far too busy this summer for such trivial things! Also after a break I doubt you will feel the way you do now. But I would have no objection, to you contacting me if you so wished" His tone was lighter now, giving Hermione a glimmer of hope, "now go, before your friends miss you and wonder where you are"
Hermione left then, not turning around as she heard the door click shut behind her. It took all of her strength and resolve not to go back and hammer on the door, begging him not to leave, but she walked on, concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other and not looking up until she reached the Gryffendor common room. Then taking a deep breath to compose herself, she uttered the password and entered. As soon as she got through the portrait hole, she saw Harry, Ginny, Ron and several others sitting around in a circle, some on chairs, some on the floor talking and laughing. On seeing her, they called her over and she joined them, putting a brave face on it and forcing her self to smile like nothing was wrong. Later she knew she would tell Ginny and probably cry her eyes out, but for now she would just pretend and try to hide her pain from people who would definitely not understand what she was going through and definitely not about who! "We have unfinished business you and I, Severus Snape!" she thought to herself, quoting what he had said to her once, "and I intend to finish it as soon as I get the chance, that's a promise"