AN: THANK YOU!!!! I love the reviews!!!! You guys are motivating me so much! In fact the only reason I didn't update sooner was that NJROTC kept me out so late this week.
There were many embarrassing moments in Daniel's life. The half dozen times he had died came to mind, as well as all the alien princesses that seemed to ALWAYS find him.
Somehow, this trounced all of that.
Juliet had dragged him—yes, dragged—down the many hallways to the commissary with strength she disguised very well. He had fought, no question there, but somehow she managed to keep her balance, even on her pair of what he had named the 'super-high heels of death'.
She filled a plate—he didn't want—with an obscene amount of food—he didn't want that either—and was patiently watching him choke down the vittles she had oh so pleasantly threatened to shove down his unwilling throat.
He really hated her.
He hated her not just for forcing him to eat, or even for dragging him down there.
It was the handcuffs.
He was being held captive by a merciless ice queen with the personality of a jar of mayonnaise. In full view of EVERYONE, they were connected by the most ridiculed tool of both the criminal justice system and bondage nuts everywhere. The marines looked like they were gonna bust a gut, the nurses were giggling—did they always have to travel in packs? —And worst of all one of his best friends had abandoned him.
Teal'c was a traitor. Not only to Daniel, but also to the entire male gender.
He had done the little lip twitch thing that said he found this amusing as hell and was internally laughing his ass off, then turned and left.
Daniel had even seen a suspiciously perky blonde head grab blue jello and bust a to-the-rear out the door.
He was alone with the enemy and there were no reinforcements to be seen.
"See, occasionally getting food in you IS a good thing." Juliet said with a disgusting amount of arrogance.
"You haven't proved anything with this except that you are a…"
"Say it." She sneered.
"A…a…" Well shit. He could never say anything cruel to a woman who wasn't Hathor.
"What? To good? To nice to come down to my level?"
What the hell was wrong with this woman? Why was she doing this?
"I was always taught not to insult a woman."
"Funny, you didn't act like a little gentleman back in your office." She said with a pompous grin and rattled the handcuffs.
He snatched his metallic restraints and looked around frantically for anyone who might have misconstrued that statement. "Have you lost your mind?"
"Well there are a few who question my sanity, but I am pretty sure it's firmly in place."
"Why are you doing this to me?" He whined plaintively
"Its fun."
"What? Humiliating me in front of my friends and co-workers? Making me do things I don't want to do?"
"Taking you down a peg or two." She said with her Cheshire grin that her pretty face change drastically into a conniving one. "And exactly how many of these people would you consider friends? How many of them do you know?"
"Um…"
"That's what I thought. Want to know why that is?"
Of course he did. He wanted to know everything and the damned frustrating woman knew that.
"You work too hard."
How the howling hell did that figure?
"You lock yourself in that damn office and sit there all day long making discoveries. Which, sure, is all great and all but lets face it if you didn't have to go through the gate with them every other day you wouldn't know SG-1 either. Eight years and you barely know the names of half the people on your staff."
Oh great she was just getting started.
"I bet if I didn't annoy you to all hell you wouldn't know my name either. You know the names of every person to so much as step into Egypt and half a bazillion other places but you don't know the name of the girl who brought you coffee everyday for the last eight years—well seven I guess since she couldn't exactly bring it to you at a higher plane. Do you know she broke into tears when she told me that she caught herself going to your office with coffee even after you bit the big one? Do you know what her name is?"
At his blank look she just shook her head.
"Nicest guy in the world they said. Her name is Evelyn. She is 34 years old with red hair and blue eyes and she just so happens to think you are the most brilliant mind in the universe. Well guess what buckeroo, I'M bringing you your coffee now—although in smaller doses—I'M doing your filing, I'LL help with translations and there's not a chance in hell that your gonna forget the name Juliet Chase."
The last sentence was shouted and caused an uproar of applause in the commissary of a kind that had not been heard since Feretti's outstanding impersonation of Jack telling off Sen. Kinsey when the film crew was there.
Daniel was stunned. No one had ever talked to the archeologist that way. It was not a good feeling to be wrong, he got that now.
She could NOT know that he knew that she was right. That was just NOT an option.
He just glared at her.
She glared right back.
"We have work to do." They said in unison.
What they didn't know was just how long work would go undone.
The war had begun.
AN: What do you think? Please review. Oh! My Beta-reader just said that you guys might not know what a 'To-The-Rear' is… it's an American military drill movement that turns a single person or entire platoon in the opposite direction. To rush out of a room or turn around immediately is called 'Busting a To-The-Rear', see what NJROTC teaches you? Thanks for reading!