I think that this story may just go on forever! AHH! It's so long, but I'm not ready to end it. This is the 26th chapter and I have so much still left to put in it. I really love it and I guess it'll just be really long.

Chapter 26: Before the Dawn

Kenshin clung tightly onto Kaoru as they slept that night. She was so peaceful as she lay there with that happy little smile on her face unaware of what was to come the next day. He couldn't postpone it any longer, he couldn't deny it no matter how much he wanted to. Other people needed him and he could not just abandon his duty.

Kenshin brushed his hand lightly against Kaoru's cheek and he could feel a great sadness well up within his heart, an aching heaviness that refused to go away. Kaoru didn't deserve to be left again. All the times he had gone away she had always waited for him, cried for him, endured through all the pain. He couldn't do that again, especially without the guarantee that he would even come back. He wasn't ready to leave her, he couldn't leave her. Not now...not ever...and yet he had too. He closed his eyes hard as though not seeing the world around him would just disappear and fade his worries into dust.

"Kaoru..." he whispered gently pulling her tight against him, burying his face deep into her lavender hair. A small tear leaked its way out his eye and his body began to shake. 'I can't leave her...not like this...I can't leave her or Kenji....Everything was so perfect...I couldn't be there for Tomoe...I have to be here for Kaoru....How can I protect her if I'm not here to watch over here? How can I just leave her pregnant and with Kenji....I promised I'd never leave her again......How can I break that promise?'

Kenshin gently released Kaoru and slid out from the blankets. With a heavy sigh he quietly walked across the wooden floor of the door and slid the shoji slowly open. Pacing back and forth he tried to find the words that he would use to tell her, but nothing would come. Every time he envisioned her crestfallen face and the tears beginning to fall from those endlessly beautiful sapphire eyes.

'I can't take this...It's driving me insane...I can't stand it anymore. Everything I do causes some to suffer....it causes someone pain...and yet I can't stop it...I'm unable to control the torrents of fate as they toss me along like a leaf caught in the wind. When will it end? When will I find my peace?'
Kaoru woke up the next morning to find that Kenshin had already woken, as usual. She stretched and smiled happily. It was another day, another great day of her life. Nothing could go wrong as long as she had Kenshin. Quickly she got dressed in her training outfit and sighed contentedly. She had no idea just how wrong things would get soon enough.

Kenshin knew that his ship for the continent was leaving this evening and he should tell Kaoru as soon as possible, but whenever he went to speak those words it always seemed that something else would come up. Kaoru had to run to stop Kenji from destroying another room or someone would stop by to visit. He hated it, but he would just have to be blunt and pull her aside and tell her.

It was just after lunch and Kenji had gone to take his afternoon nap. Yahiko had gone for his part time job at the Aka beko and it was just them alone sitting out in the porch. This was the perfect time for Kenshin to tell her. She looked so beautiful sitting next to him, that small smile on her face, the one that hid all that mischief. He slowly opened his mouth to say the words, to tell her what would certainly crush her when she interrupted without even noticing.

"I can't wait Kenshin! Another baby! I wonder if it will be a boy or a girl? What do you want, Kenshin? I'm not sure I'm ready to be pregnant again, but I think I can make it through as long as you're here Kenshin." Kaoru said looking at him with those eyes.

"You're eyes..." Kenshin whispered softly as he felt his heart fill with pain again.

"What?" Kaoru asked in confusion.

Kenshin brought his hand up to her cheek and brushed it softly. "They're so beautiful..." he murmured.

Kaoru was thoroughly confused. "What are you talking about Kenshin? Is something the matter? What is it?"

All the sudden Kenshin broke and he felt himself crumbled against her. "I can't do this Kaoru! I can't take it anymore. Why can't the world just leave me alone?!" He clung tight to her stunned body and he could feel ashamed tears wind their way down his face.

Realization suddenly hit Kaoru and she knew. "...What...Tell me Kenshin..." she said, refusing to believe.

Kenshin pulled himself together and turned away from her. "Kaoru..." he began, unable to face her. His voice was terribly cold and lifeless. "I'm leaving again."

Kaoru's heart crumbled. "But...Kenshin!? Why?" she cried reaching out for him, but Kenshin shunned her grasp.

"The countries are not at peace. A war is growing and they need me Kaoru. I must leave tonight to go board a ship to the continent."

Kaoru could feel the tears begin to flow down her cheeks. "Kenshin...no....You can't leave again...I need you..."

Kenshin suddenly snapped around to face her, a look of immense pain in his tired face. There were tears in his eyes too. "Listen Kaoru...I broke my promise. I failed you. I said I'd never leave you...I said I'd never hurt you again, but here I am again doing it, hurting you so much. I can't promise you that I'll ever return...I can't promise you that I'll ever see you again..." his voice was so bitter as he approached her and wrapped his arms around her body.

"The only thing I can promise you..." he slowly leaned closer so that his lips were brushing hers. "..is that I will always love you..." Kenshin slowly leaned forward and brought Kaoru's lips to meet his in what could be their last kiss.

I'm running, chasing an illusion

How can I catch what cannot be caught?

An illusive dream I've been seeking

To keep you safe inside my arms

But before the dawn I'll find you

And hold you tight to me

Before the beginning of the end

I'll be right there with you

My heart wants to keep you

Clinging tight unto your warmth

Yet the world is tearing me from you

Ripping away each shred of happiness

But still I chase that illusive dream

Hoping that maybe someday I'll catch it

Someday we'll never part, I'll never leave

Wishing that the dawn will never come