Introduction: I decided just to stick this next story on the end of Oro to make things easier. Sorry it took me so long to update. Yaoi has infested my system and because I do not believe in pairing up Sano with Kenshin this story has taken a while to come back into my top priority list. (that doesn't mean I don't love it though!) Also this all probably horribly historically inaccurate.
---
Chapter One: So Far Away from Me
---
The waiting never seemed to end for Kaoru. It stretched on forever like the ocean with the other side never in sight. Ever since that day that Kenshin had left, things had never been the same. She tried her hardest not to fall under the pressure, but her heart was just breaking too much. She knew that she had to hold on so the first month passed with hardly a tear shed.
Kenji was unusually quiet lately, his troublesome nature not as apparent. He looked so much like Kenshin that it made Kaoru's heart break. She was ashamed to admit that it hurt to look at him. Yahiko had been very helpful lately to her, never complaining, helping her take care of Kenji even when he was busy with other things. No one really talked about Kenshin's absence, especially around Kaoru and it seemed the dojo had grown quiet.
It was an especially quiet afternoon at the Kamiya dojo. The wind blew gently, a chill wind that told of the harsh winter that was approaching. A chill ran down Kaoru's spine as she gently took the laundry down from the hanging poles. She hated doing the laundry. It always reminded her of him. She could just see his smiling face as he gently scrubbed, the bubbles getting in his hair. How he would laugh when he saw Kenji playing in the yard or how he would pout when Kenji would come splashing into the just washed clothes, covered in mud. Those little tender moments that she had never fully appreciated until now. How she longed for those days again, when every morning she could wake up wrapped in his embrace.
Without thinking she let a tear form a path down her cheek, her resolution cracking as she let the laundry slip from her fingers and fluttered forgotten to the ground. 'I knew this would happen…I knew I couldn't fight it forever…but…' she thought miserably as more tears began to come to her face. Her hands began to shake and she slowly dropped down to her knees onto the hard ground. One hand went to her slightly bulging stomach. 'How am I going to do this without you Kenshin? Where are you right now?....All I know….is that you're so far away from me…'
---
Kenshin collapsed onto the ground, his feet aching as he took a moment to rest. He didn't know exactly where they were, but the troops were being moved from an outpost by the shore to deeper inland where there would be more cover. Kenshin remained with the untrained troops, refusing to take part in any of the killing. His job was merely to train the new recruitments how to defend themselves. He didn't really enjoy the job, but it was what he had to do.
He quickly stood up when he saw an officer approaching, using his sword as a prop to stand.
"Battousai, the major Katsuragi requests your presence in the main tent."
Kenshin nodded and the officer disappeared, off about his business. Kenshin slowly wound his way through the many tents that had been erected on the cliff overlooking the ocean shore. Kenshin hated it here, the sight of all these soldiers bringing back bad memories that he would rather have undisturbed.
Kenshin wasn't the least bit curious about what the Major wanted him. It was probably just the same old thing, trying to convince Kenshin to go back to the battlefield to fight and lead the troops. Every time Kenshin refused to go back because he just couldn't kill again. The endless bloodshed that surrounded him was tearing him apart.
Oh, Kaoru if I could only be there for you. I want to return to your side so bad, but there are people that need me. When I married you I didn't know that I was putting so much weight on your shoulders, but...deep inside I think you knew that I would leave again. How many times have I broken my promise to you? How many times have I said that I would never leave, but yet here I am away from your side. It's always like this, and I fear that it will always be like this. Even though it tears me apart there is nothing I can do about it. I love you, but it's almost like we weren't meant to be together.
Kenshin sighed allowing his bangs to flow freely in front of his troubled violet eyes. War was always so pointless and tore so many people apart. He wished that he were not here, helping others to kill. The blood may not be on his hands, but…
A sudden blast from the campsite alerted his attention. He whipped around to see a cloud of billowing smoke coming from the main medic tent and without even thinking he was speeding off in the direction of the blast.
Kenshin heard screams as blasts began all around him. Someone was attacking them, and with bombs no less. Why are they launching an attack here and now? I thought that we were in a safe area.
Kenshin quickly reached the heart of the bloodshed, where injured soldiers rushed to escape and others quickly tried to assess the situation. It was impossibly to tell from where the enemy was attacking. They must be using stealth techniques and there probably wasn't that many of them. The only reason that they had been overtaken yet was probably that they caught all of their opponents by surprise, silencing them quickly.
"Himura! Please help us!" He heard a cry from his right side. Before he could turn to look there was a loud 'boom' and everything began to go black.
---
Kaoru sat, silent, her legs folded up beneath her and one hand resting on her slightly bulging stomach. Two letters lay out before her. One obviously was from Kenshin and the other…it bore the seal of the Japanese army. She was fearful and anxious to open both of them because in her heart she knew that something was wrong, something was not right.
Her hands trembled as she reached out and picked up Kenshin's letter, which was dated a mere day before the other one. It read:
Dear Kaoru
I need you to understand something. I can't lie to you even though the truth is hurtful. When I got into this I knew that there was little chance of ever coming out alive. I know that this letter will bring you sadness and the thought of it almost makes me want to tear it up, but at the same time I know that not sending it to you would only bring you greater pain still. In my heart I want nothing more to be with you again and to hold you in my arms as I once did, but it seems that such things cannot be so.
I want you to know that I will love you forever and that even though the world is tearing us apart I will always try to return to you in the end. I will never abandon you or our children because my heart is not my own anymore and it belongs to you. Every breath in my body I give to you and every beat of my heart is yours alone.
I don't know how much longer they want me to stay here, but I guess it will for be a least for one more year. I entrust in you the naming of our newest child when it arrives because I fear that I will not be present at that time. I'm so sorry again...my Kaoru.
Tell Yahiko and the others hello for me. I don't have much time. I'm needed a lot here. I'll write again as soon as I have time...
Your husband,
Kenshin
Kaoru sighed again as she gently set the letter down, her fingers lingering on its surface before she picked up the other one.
Dear Mrs. Kaoru Himura,
We are deeply grieved to inform you that your husband, Kenshin Himura, is currently missing in action and is supposed dead. The Japanese army thanks your husband for his years of dedication and hard work. Please accept our deepest condolences.
The letter dropped from her hands and she felt her whole body go numb as she collapsed onto the ground.
A/N: Please ignore inaccuracy since I do not know what wars are really like back in the late 1800s!