I Want A Divorce!

A/N-Sorry for the late update, I had to go to Reno, but now I'm back. I'm so touched by the number of review I've received. I was going to update chapter two on Friday but the Fanfiction network server was busy. Anywayz enjoy!

Disclaimer- I have not kidnapped any of the characters from J.K.'s wonderful mind, I'm just borrowing them and locking them inn my closet because I am hopelessly obsessed.

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Chapter Three- Switching places

(Previous chapter, Lily's POV)

Stupid Potter and his stupid ego. Lily thought as she menacingly stomped through the common room, the same first years she encountered thirty minutes ago dove behind couches for cover. Oh great here comes Black, can't that idiot see that I want to be left alone? Lily scowled deeply as Sirius mentioned James' name, she gave an uncharacteristic growl that sent Sirius scampering off like a little scared girl.

I guess he remembers my Bat Boogey Hex. She mused as she finally reached her dorm and jumped onto her four postern bed, screaming all her frustrations into the pillow as her best friends, Amber McKinnon and Emmeline Vance rushed over to see what's wrong.

"What did Potter do this time?" Emmeline sighed as she threw her long wavy hair behind her back. Amber lazily picked up the latest edition of Witch Weekly as she half listened to their conversation, used to the same pattern that happened for the past two years.

After their fifth year James had given up on Lily, finally getting the point that if she'd rather defends Snape and go out with the Giant Squid than saying yes to him, than she would never change her mind. So from that day on he stopped stalking her, but instead pranking her fiercer than ever which annoyed Lily more than usual. Soon they would yell and bicker whenever their paths crossed, and only behaved in the presence of a teacher. So that's how it went for two looong years, they would scream their heads off, Lily would slap James, scream on her pillow, and have either Emmeline or Amber comfort her, usually taking turns.

"Potter's going to be my husband" Lily groaned as she started to hit her head repeatedly on her pillow, silently cursing James in her mind, though what he did wrong she did not know. But according to her laws of physics its when something bad happens, its Potters fault, sometimes Black's though usually Potter.

And this was definitely bad.

Amber dropped her magazine in surprised as Emmeline gaped at her. "Ex-excuse me?" she gasped out as Amber nodded her head dumbly, too shocked top response properly.

"James proposed to you?!?" Amber continued in a high squeaky voice as Emmeline finally broke out into a grin. "Well good for you" she said to a shocked Lily "I knew you liked each other with all that bicker, were you dating behind our backs?" Emmeline smiled mischievously.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!" Lily looked scandalized. "No I'm not really getting married to him! It's a school program! Me and Potter together for real? Ewewewewewewewew!" It seemed like she was fighting a strong erg to roll up into fetal position and start sucking her thumb.

"What school program?" Amber frowned as she sat on the bed next to Lily patting her back as Emmeline shoved her fist into her mouth to keep from laughing.

"What's so funny?" Lily snapped as she glared at her now laughing friend.

"I'm sorry." Emmeline said sounding not so sorry at all. "You guys are just so gullible; I knew you aren't really getting married. You and James missed the last prefect meeting but it seems that Dumbledore was inspired by some muggle movie and wanted to start a marriage program to prepare us for the real world. Of, course many of us protested so we agreed that if the head boy and girl showed us an example of how we should behave for the first few days, than we'll agree to be paired up with each other" Emmeline smiled meekly as Lily shot her a Why-didn't-you-tell-me look.

"But it's okay!" Emmeline said before Lily could open her mouth. "It's only like for a month or something."

"But McGonagall said it was a whole year thing!" Lily wailed.

"What?!?" Amber spoke up. "I'm not spending a whole year with some stupid guy!"

"Unless it's Remus, huh?" Emmeline winked at her, making Amber blush.

"Well at least you guys have a few days to prepare; I mean this was just thrown at me in a sign at the Head's room!" Lily moaned.

"Aww quit whining you baby!" Emmeline said in a playful matter. "It's not that bad!"

"It's not bad?" Lily's eyes widened in disbelief. "This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me!"

Suddenly the world began to spin widely and she saw Emmeline's and Amber's worried face before the world turn all black.

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(James POV)

"Stupid…crash…Evans….crash….bloody….crash….program!" James grumbled as he threw random objects towards the wall, only stopping to listen to the faint clucking below.

After a few moments of moping around he jumped on his bed and tossed out all but his boxers off his bed as he slammed his head on the pillow, hoping to sleep his problems away.

"This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me!" he mumbled, but to his surprise his vision started spinning.

"What the?" He quickly jammed his glasses back on his face before everything went black…..

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Ten minutes later……

A low moan escaped from Lily as she slowly got up from her bed, trying to remember what had happened to her. She looked around at her surroundings looking for Amber or Emmeline, but none of them were there. To her surprise she found a messy dormitory with random clothing and food strewn around the floor as all the four poster beds were placed differently.

Huh?

She tried to rub her eyes but was blocked by a pair of thick glasses? She slowly took them off to quickly find that everything looked blurry and placed the back on. She did this for a couple times before a horrible idea dawned on her.

Lily blindly placed her hands on her chest to find...nothing. She looked down and screamed as she saw anice muscular body in a pair of red boxers with tiny snitches flying about. This wasn't her body. She blinked and ran her hands through her hair…. This wasn't her hair…..

Quickly rushing up to her feet she desperately searched for a mirror hoping against all hope that this was some wild dream. Surely, surely she wouldn't be him. She couldn't be the only person she ever despised. Surely she can't be the one who picked on her ever since she met him on Hogwarts Express. Surely she just can't be him. Can she?

She found a small hand mirror in one of the drawers and screamed in surprise. For in the mirror stood a very shocked face of James Potter.

So absorbed in fighting the erg to faint she didn't recognize another scream emitting from the girl's dormitory just as she had. Lily pinched herself to check if she was dreaming, but to her dismay, she felt the pain. She started to hyperventilate for a second before she heard a loud "BLOODY HELL". Judging by the sound of her own voice, Lily knew in an instant that Potter was in the same predicament.

Potter…….

Remembering her own laws of physics all her anger went towards one Gryffindor Quidditch Captain as she yelled in a high shrill voice….. "POTTER!"

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A/N- WHooo! I'm typing this in Reno! Too bad I can only put this up by Sunday… Aww well. Hope you like it! Pleaz review!

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