Warning: No warning, because it says slash on the summary. So if you prefer hetero, why the fuck are you looking at this? Ass. Actually, warning that Draco's a bit ignorant about the Spanish ethnicity, but don't worry, he's taught his lesson in the end o.o
Disclaimer: Go ahead, sue my ass. I got nothin'. I got a used retainer that I will be happy to get rid of, a plastic cup with a drop of apple juice in it…a broken pen and a turquoise stapler. Maybe you can sell that shit on E-bay and buy a decent job where you don't have to try and squeeze money out of little teenage girls who write about a fuckin' book about a flippin' wizard and his magical adventures. We may not be cool, but hell, you're worse if you think we believe we actually own this shit. Word, dawg, word.
It is important that you all realize that Jesús is pronounced He-Zeus. Not Jesus. Well, it's not really that important, but still…you should just remember because it'll make this piece of crap a bit funnier…and…um…I love you? (
The little numbers in parenthesis like this: (#) indicate that at the bottom it'll say what it means. Like the crazy Spanish stuff and junk.
Enough with me. Let's get on with this…'cause this is damn long for a one shot. I need a nap.
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When a Malfoy is born, they are taught the rules immediately. Yes, there are rules to being a Malfoy…but c'mon, that's not really that surprising.
All members of the high-class socialite family must follow the rules at all times, or otherwise fly the risk of being an outcast. And yes, this has happened.
For instance, there was Wendell Leroy Malfoy III, who unknowingly wore his trousers backwards the entire night of the annual London Wizard's Wine Tasting event (where only the best of the best were invited), too hammered to notice nor care. Needless to say, he was never spoken of again, and it's rumored he now goes by Lisa…traumatized from the ordeal. Obviously. Or so his parents like to believe.
But that's beside the point.
The point is, a rule had been broken. And something terribly wrong, that must be dealt with for redemption, otherwise, there would be horrible heat from his bloodline.
Yes, Draco Malfoy had broken a sacred rule…one that was very far up the list.
He had fell. Not even fell, but was tripped. Even more horrible, but by Potter. The disgustingly heroic, goody-goody, insufferable prat, Harry James Potter. That name was like smallpox for Draco's mind. He felt diseased just saying it.
He played the events over in his mind.
I leaned against the stone wall behind me. I hated waiting for Pansy; she always took so long, probably flirting with that new exchange student with the 'exotic and sensual Hispanic accent'. I think that was his name now, since that's how he always seemed to be referred to by. Glancing down the hallway, I saw the Golden Trio. I sunk back into the shadows so I could make an undetected attack if I felt up to the challenge.
"Ugh! I can't believe this! Another bloody detention with Snape, and I didn't even do anything!" Potter tugged on his hair in frustration. He should really comb that mess.
"Harry, you did do something. You knocked his inkbottle right into his lap! That's going to take a little more than club soda to get out." I rolled my eyes upon hearing this. Really, Granger was even more of a saint than Potter.
"Oh, Herm, really! It was an accident. Why would Harry do something like that on purpose? Isn't that right mate?" The golden boy nodded obediently towards the Weasel. Ha, just like the little dog he is. Obeys his master, indeed…I wonder how he would look chained up like a puppy…Hmm…
Ahem.
"Oh, come on. I'm not daft. Whose arm extends fully to 'wave to a friend'? Really! And anyway, the only person with in waving distance was Patil, and you don't even like her all that much." I tried not to snort at this, as annoying as she was; Granger was extremely clever, and quite funny at times…though always on accident. Unlike my natural humor.
Potter's eye seems to be twitching now. Oh, I think I'm beginning to enjoy this. …Maybe a little too much.
"Well, he deserved it. That bastard pretty much takes points away from me, only to redistribute them…to that bloody, smarmy little ferret." Oh lord, I didn't even do anything…yet. Why must I always be involved in his rants of loathing? Stupid scar headed little monster.
I must have vengeance.
As they approached closer, I saw Panse waving to me from the opposite end of the hall (Oh Merlin, she's with the Spaniard again). This was my opportunity.
I made my way towards the trio, who immediately cast their pitiful excuses of glares towards me. Potter was in an especially foul mood today…oh, sweet, sweet, torment. I love thee so.
"Well, well, well. You're looking as grotesque and inelegant as usual. Although, it seems today's attack on the potions' master seems to have made you even more disgusting. I say, you should have just hidden in Granger's hair until he calmed down. Maybe you would have found a nut or two, provided you were hungry."
Oh-ho, I must say I am extremely witty.
Potter must have noticed this also, because he growled menacingly at me (though I'm sure it was in jealous of my cunning mind) and seemed about say something when Granger butted in.
"Harry, ignore him. You too, Ronald. He's not worth the time. Such an ignorant fool won't batter my ego. He means nothing of which he says, because he knows nothing. He's just a confused little boy, it's actually kind of sad."
How dare she brush me off like that?!
"I guess you're right, Mione…" Pothead started…with a glint in his eye…that I did not particularly like.
He smirked and before I knew what was happening, he had stuck out his foot so as I walked past…I fell. Flat on my gorgeous face.
Stunned, at such an immature act, it took me a few moments to gather myself to stand up. And as I did, I looked back into those disgusting green eyes of whom else but Mr. Harry James Potter.
"Besides…sometimes a little ferret like that just needs to be tamed" He held a smirk and turned back around to face the direction he was headed. But before he did, he did one of the most unspeakable things you can imagine.
He winked.
I am outraged! I am appalled! And I am most definitely not, in the very least, turned on!
Not at all!
Vengeance shall be swift and sweet.
"Oy, what the hell was that, Drake? I don't think I've ever even seen you stumble. As horrible as that Potter prat is…that was bloody hilarious!" And would you believe it, the little bitch then proceeded to laugh…haughtily, I might add, in my face.
"Pansy. There will be no more discussion of that minor detail of this tale. What we will be speaking of, however, will be how Scarhead will be compensated for his deeds…Hmm?"
She rubbed her hands together and smiled that mischievous way she does, and I knew I could count on her assistance then.
"Oh, Draco…I love it when we get to plot!"
The blonde star of Slytherin sunk comfortably into one of the big, green, cushy armchairs of the common room.
"So, Panse, I'm going to take it you have an idea…since you've been snickering since we stepped through the door."
"Oh yes," Pansy said, dragging out the –s sound as she did. "Jesús was telling me earlier a spell he used to use before he learned English… Jesús, darling, why don't you tell Drake all about it?"
'Ugh, she's fluttering her eyelashes like an idiot already. God, just show him your tits and get it over with.' Draco thought.
"Well," Jesús started "When I first arrived in the UK, I was alone, because if you didn't know, I live with my tía y tío…eh, which is err…aunt and uncle in English."
Draco nodded. He was bored already.
"So, I had taken a plane over to this country…which is this big Muggle thing that flies without magic and takes people where they need to go…except it takes longer." Jesús ran a hand nervously through his brown hair and only continued after Pansy reached over and patted his hand with a smile. Jesús was obviously not used to having speak so much English to a stranger in one go. It was plain tiring.
"Anyway, I had to take the plane because I needed to get away without stirring up too much magical activity, so erm…no one would come and uh…arrest me. Don't ask. Long story."
Draco suddenly understood why the boy had immigrated so far. This caused him to snicker a bit, the boy may be ethnic, but he was definitely Slytherin. He silently wondered if he had killed anyone, and unconsciously backed up a tad.
"So, I was there at the airport, alone. And I was told there would be a 'Nigel' waiting for me since my t- erm, aunt and uncle both had work that day. So, I walked up to the white man with the sign with my name on it and he gestured for me to follow. But at that time, I had just noticed one of my bags was missing.
"So I started tugging him backwards, trying to tell him, but I didn't know much English then. I mean, I had taken some English back home, but it's different when everyone is talking so fast, I guess I just hadn't gotten used to it yet. He didn't know what I was talking about, but he knew something was wrong. So he led me to bathroom, took me aside and said slowly…I think it was something like 'I'm going to find someone who can speak Spanish'. I'm not sure, though."
Pansy nodded excitedly, looking riveted by the story. And Draco simply waved his hand as if say 'Yes, go on. We haven't got all day'. Yes, Malfoys were also taught to speak with body language perfectly. Which was very useful during poker and other gambling games, mind you.
"So, I was so frustrated, I ran into one of the stalls, locked the door, and went into my bag holding my books…I thank God that it wasn't the one I had lost." Jesús continued.
"I fished out one of my new spell books I had recently bought, and flipped through trying to find something that would help me situation. And well…I did." He smirked and pulled out a crumbled up piece of paper from his pocket.
"This helped me when I needed it, and by now, I don't need the page to tell me how to do it. So now, it can help you, since you seem to need it."
The Spanish 7th year tossed the bruised parchment to the platinum blonde, who caught it with ease.
"What is this?" Draco asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"See for yourself."
Draco slowly unfolded the paper, careful not to rip it.
Dictio Aequabilis HispaniHaving trouble getting the point across?
Maybe if they understood, they could see just whose boss.
Whether it be a prank, or to change ignorant views,
Changing what language one understands is sure to confuse.
So raise your wand, and say it clear.
Because Spanish will be the only thing that will go through that ear.
A rare smile spread across that pale face.
"Jesus, I think you and I are going to get along just fine."
"It's Jesús."
"Whatever."
Harry walked down the hallways headed for the kitchens. Hermione had been, as usual, forcing the boys to study for hours for final exams. Using his hunger for an excuse, Harry had bolted out of the commons and fled.
"Well, well…out for a stroll, Potter?" Harry quickly spun around to face his longtime rival.
"What do you want, ferret?"
Draco sneered and clutched the crumpled parchment in his hand.
"Revenge."
"What are you talking about, you nutter?"
"Dictio aequabilis hispani!"
Suddenly, words were twisting inside the Gryffindor's mind at an alarming pace and he found himself not to be able to control his thoughts. With what seemed like an eternity and a split second all in one, clarity was brought back into Harry's head and he was alone in the hall.
Maybe he had been imagining things…he had taken a bump on the head earlier that morning when he fell- erm…exited his bed. It seemed although Draco had it bad, the two rivals had their pride in common.
Harry shook it off and continued walking to the kitchens…to get quite a surprise.
Doby was shuffling around when he noticed him. He waved and scuttled happily towards Harry. He opened his mouth for a greeting, but all that came out was gibberish.
"What? What did you say, Doby?"
Doby screwed up his face in a confused way and continued talking that strange way.
"Doby, I don't understand a thing you're saying! Calm down!"
By this time, the house elf had a very alarmed look upon his face and was squealing in fear. He took Harry by the hand and yanked him forwards as he started to run.
By the time they arrived to the common room, Hermione and Ron seemed to have settled with their amount of studying and were packing their things back up in their bags.
Hermione smiled until she saw the look on Doby's face.
She opened her mouth, and just like Doby had, spoke in that strange way.
Harry was now becoming very nervous.
'Alright, so nothing's wrong with Doby…there's something wrong with me! Gah!'
Harry continued to stew in his own frightened thoughts while Doby, Ron, and Hermione spoke in crazy gibberish tongue. Hermione walked up to him and inspected him, as if looking for faults. She said something to him that he couldn't understand.
"Herm! I can't understand you! Stop, my brain hurts!"
Hermione quirked her eyebrows and turned around to face Ron and Doby, talking low…not that it matter how loud she talked.
'Okay, I need to calm down. Hermione will figure this out. I just need to relax…I need to think how this happened…I mean…Wait- I am such a dolt.'
"Malfoy." Harry hissed. And yes, this word is the same in every language.
This gained the attention of his comrades, and as he stormed out to go find the Slytherin common room, they tried to follow him, but he motioned for them to stay behind.
Oh no, he wanted to take care of the git himself.
Draco clinked his glass of wine with his accomplices and grinned evilly.
"Hmm…I do say that it was one brilliant spell. I thank you, Jesus."
"Jesús."
Draco sneered. He did not like to be corrected, but he let it pass…since the attack on Potter would have been nothing without the help of the Spanish boy.
"So, how long does this spell usually last, Jesús, darling?" Pansy asked, making eyes at the other boy for what seemed like the thirty-sixth time in a row to Draco.
'Or should I say treinta y seis?' He thought with a mental snort. Malfoys were also forced to learn the numbers in every language, so then no cheap little immigrant could cheat them out of their money when making a deal.
"Oh, usually no more than two to three hours. It's hard to change the way a person thinks, which is what a language is really, so it doesn't last too long."
Pansy smiled again in that atrocious way, making Draco want to gag.
As Pansy was about to compliment the tanned boy on his knowledge, there was a loud banging on the common room door.
"What the hell?"
But within the next five seconds, it would become apparent who it was and what they wanted.
"¡Abra esta puerta, usted se sacude! ¡Usted no puede ir alrededor solamente del cambio lo que la gente de lengua dice! ¡Deje de ser tan inmaduro y déjeme entrar!" (1)
All three Slytherins did nothing but laugh at the frustrated voice, although Jesús was laughing more a bit at what he said about Draco, since he understood what he was saying.
Draco did remember that the other boy could understand exactly what the Boy-That-Lived was saying, but said nothing of it. For some reason, he wasn't sure if he really wanted to know what the boy was saying about him.
"Oh, I hafta see this. I'm letting him in. I have to watch him squirm. This is too rich." Pansy bounced up excitedly and ran to open the door. And of course, a very angry looking Harry Potter was standing on the other side.
He glared across every set of eyes he saw, making the few Slytherins that had been in the room besides Draco, Pansy, and Jesús flee.
"Haga este marcharse, usted asno." (2)
The blonde burst out laughing, the sight of the great Harry Potter looking overly flustered and talking in a foreign language confusedly and angrily was enough to tickle him alone, but then there was the fact that Potter knew he could not understand him, but was continued to make lame attempts obviously in vain.
Harry switched his stare to the Spanish boy and spoke.
"You," he said in the other boy's native language "I know you can understand me. Why the fuck did you help this kid? He's been nothing but ignorant and rude about your back round and I haven't done a single thing to you!"
Jesús smiled sweetly. "While you may be right about what a buffoon he is, I did not do it for him. I did it for the girl. I've got quite a thing for her, you see, and she asked if I had any ideas. Why are you so upset anyway? Is this really so bad, you can get away with saying anything you want, and the wont know. I won't tell. As long as you don't say anything about myself or that little flower."
Harry was quiet, half because he was considering this idea, and half because the thought of the Slytherin girl as a 'little flower' was a bit disturbing. Partly because he didn't even like girls much, but that was another story for another day.
"You know, Jesús…I think you're right."
He smirked and turned to face Draco all while stalking towards.
Draco suddenly found himself a bit nervous as Harry approached him. The closer Harry got, the more he wanted to run away from the golden boy. He backed up slowly, as his nemesis got closer and closer. Before he knew it, was backed up into the wall behind him and Harry was looking pleased with the current situation.
"Usted es una pequeña criatura asquerosa. Usted hace trampas, usted miente, usted la gente de rata hacia fuera, solamente conseguir lo que usted quiere. Usted está autoobsesionado, y usted parece disgustar alguien que discrepa con sus opiniones. Usted es un pequeño hurón disimulado quién se preocupa a mucho por lo que los otros piensan y a veces lamento que yo no pudiera pegarle solamente directamente en la mandíbula entonces usted no sería capaz de hablar." As Harry said this, he allowed himself to inch closer to the blonde, letting his body hover just a few inches apart with the other boy's.
He smirked through the entire statement and didn't notice the Spanish boy whipping out a piece of parchment to scribble down all the things he was saying…in Spanish of course.
"Pero," Harry continued "No hago. Como sé no importa que terrible usted es, es sólo porque usted es demasiado de un debilucho para pararse después de sus estándares. Y en total, usted es brillante, tanto en mente ... como en cuerpo. Y en algún sitio en aquel pequeño corazón horrible, deben haber unos buenos, porque aunque usted sea ... bastardo usted no es malo. Más, usted parece adorable cuando usted se retuerce." Harry leaned closer and put his hands up against the wall, next to Draco's (very frightened) head.
Meanwhile, Pansy silently wondered why Jesús' eyes were so big as he wrote, and why he kept clearing his throat so often.
"Que es en parte por qué divierto de mí tanto en este momento. También creo que todos los animales pueden ser domados, incluso pequeños hurones. Y no importa como o cuando, soy determinado para romperle hasta que usted pida en mis pies. Y ya que usted no puede entenderme, adivino que sería agradable decir solamente que sería agradable ver una sonrisa verdadera sobre su cara, y saber que lo puse allí. Incluso si usted es un idiota. Y adivino que le quiero. Como usted es el único quién no me adora para la fama, que bastante francamente es muy molesta. Pero, me gustaría usted adorarme, desde luego, pero por motivos ... diferentes. Y para el efecto gracioso terminaré este pequeño discurso con este: Venga aquí y siente su asno fino en el regazo del Papá."
He ended with an incredibly non-Gryffindor-ish malicious grin and slyly slid his knuckles against the upper arm of the blonde and then fingertips as he pulled his hand away.
Obviously, Draco could not take this anymore, because he exploded. Not literally, although, that would be quite interesting.
"YOU! JESUS! WHAT IS HE SAYING?! WHY ARE YOU WRITING THIS DOWN?!"
Harry had actually noticed the Hispanic writing it all down, but it didn't bother him much, since no one else understood anyway, and even if Draco or someone got the immigrant to translate it, it didn't matter because he knew Draco would probably just get angry and think it a joke, or get all flustered and never speak of it again.
"It's Jesús. For the last time, git." Yes, he was a tad annoyed.
But obviously not as annoyed as the squirming little puddle that was Draco Malfoy.
"I'LL CALL YOU WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT, YOU LITTLE SPICK!"
Gasps from around the room were heard, even Harry understood that last word.
"…You need to learn a lesson, you deserve this more than he does…Dictio aequabilis Hispani!"
Draco's mind suddenly filled with pure regret, but was quickly replaced with confusion of words swirling and twirling and mixing in his brain. When he regained his composure, Potter was still standing in front of him looking very smug.
"Ohhh, you shouldn't have done that. Heh, you definitely deserved that spell more than I did."
Draco growled. The only person could understand him (other than the one who put the curse on him) was Potter. Things were not looking well.
"And sorry, Potter, but this will make things even more interesting. And he deserves it." Jesús picked up the piece of parchment he had written on and tossed it to Draco.
"What?! No! I thought we had a deal! I didn't do anything!" The dark haired boy shouted with wide eyes.
"Yes, yes. Well, this was before he called me a spick. Things are going to get as worse as they can be for that little brat, no matter who has to be stepped on to do it. Anyways, I'm still Slytherin, after all." The exchange student then noticed how bored and confused Pansy was looking and motioned her to follow him.
"We're leaving now. Have fun." He said before either could protest.
Draco started down at the paper and gulped. He had been debating whether he should read it for the last few moments.
"Malfoy, don't read it."
"I'll do whatever I damn well please, Potter. What exactly did you say anyway? There must be something in here I should know if there was such a big fuss made over it…" Draco really wanted to know what it said, but at the same time he didn't. He hated to admit it, but he was sure there were some hurtful things in there.
"Malfoy…just don't. It's not that- It's just…well, just don't okay?!"
Draco had made up his mind. Seeing the golden boy all riled up like this was worth a few of his measly feelings hurt. It was only Potter, anyway.
He smirked, as Potter seemed to convulse as Draco unfolded the parchment with rough, obviously male handwriting on it. All in Spanish, of course.
'You are a foul little creature. You cheat, you lie, you rat people out, just to get what you want. You're self-obsessed, and you seem to dislike anyone who disagrees with your opinions. You're a sneaky little ferret who cares to much about what others think and sometimes I wish I could just sock you right in the jaw so you wouldn't be able to talk.' He frowned as he read the first few lines. He would wait until he was finished the entire thing to beat the crap out of the other.
'But...I don't. Because I know no matter how terrible you are, it's only because you're too much of a wimp to stop following their standards. And in all, you're brilliant, in both mind...and body. And somewhere in that horrible little heart, there must be some good, because even though you're a bastard...you're not evil. Plus, you look adorable when you squirm.' Draco cursed himself when he noticed that yes, he was squirming even now.
'Which is partly why I am enjoying myself so much at the moment. I also believe that all animals can be tamed, including little ferrets. And no matter how or when, I am determined to break you until you're begging at my feet. And since you can't understand me, I guess it would be nice to just say that it would be nice to see a true smile on your face, and know that I put it there. Even if you are an idiot. And I guess I want you. Because you're the only one who doesn't worship me for the fame, which quite frankly is very annoying. But, I would like you to worship me, of course, but for...different reasons. And for humorous effect I will end this little speech with this: Come here and sit your fine ass in Daddy's lap.'
He set the parchment down on the closest end table and turned away. He could feel Potter's embarrassment. And it was frankly quite fun. He really was quite sure how he felt about all of it, though. A part of him was disgusted, a part was very angry, a part of him was laughing at the light humor in it, and a part of him was kind of touched at some of the words. But if anyone decides to reveal that, well, they shall suffer a horrible death.
"Potter…" He finally spoke. "You disgust me."
Harry's eyebrows slanted. Malfoy's tone wasn't really as serious and intimdating as it should be if he was really telling the truth.
"You're such a bull shitter, Malfoy." He blurted out.
"Excuse me!?" He spun around in shock, thinking maybe his ears had deceived him.
Well, he had already made a jackass of himself, might as well go with it. There was the small chance of playing it off, after all.
"You heard me, you put this stupid bloody spell on me, just because I tripped you. It wasn't even that big of deal. Now we're both in this mess because of your immaturity!" Alright, so he had pretty much just changed the subject, but still, it seemed to be working.
"Just tripped!? I was thoroughly embarrassed in front of my peers, thank you!"
"Well, you insulted me then made fun of Herm's hair!"
"Well, her hair is crazy! And she obviously didn't even care!"
"It doesn't matter how you think her hair looks, you still don't say things like that! And no matter how much she says she doesn't care, you know it still hurts her!"
"Oh, just like when you call me a 'bloody, smarmy little ferret'?!"
The room grew silent.
"That definitely was not what I meant to say." Draco snipped, correcting his obvious mistake.
"Yes, but that's what you were thinking."
The blonde was trapped and he knew it.
"Oh, well, so what if I was? You talk about how cruel I am, yet you fail to notice you're just as bad, especially when pointing out when I am, indeed, cruel. I never even point out when you insult, inferring that you are just as bad. So, doesn't that make you twice as bad?"
Harry was silent. He knew he really wasn't as bad as Draco, because he did it for good reasoning: Self Defense. But the boy did have a point, so he said nothing.
"So, why don't you think about that next time you call me a bloody ferret?"
"But, Draco, you are a ferret." Harry smirked and closed the distance between them, kissing him harshly.
Draco gasped and quickly pushed him away.
"You can't say that a-and do that!"
"Why not?"
"Y-you just can't! It doesn't make any sense! You can't insult someone then kiss them! It's just not right!"
"Well, first of all…since when have you cared what's right and what isn't? And anyway…like I said…ferrets can be tamed." He closed in again, this time more gentle.
Only to be pushed away once more.
"I won't be your pet, nor your toy, Potter." The blonde hissed.
"Don't make such accusations. I'm only going to treat you like a person should, because obviously someone forgot to in your life."
Pansy and Jesús entered the common room about an hour later, only to find it empty. The girl of the group raised her eyebrows when she thought she heard something coming from the dorms.
"Dómeme." (3)
Pansy looked towards her friend questioningly, who only smiled.
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Dictio Aequabilis Hispani is roughly translated 'Speak like the Spaniards' I know nothing of Latin except some roots that I should really be paying attention to in English…since the whole "Ima be a big famous wry-tur, yo" thing -.-U
Open this door, you jerk! You can't just go around changing what language people speak! Stop being so immature and let me in!
Make this go away, you ass.
Tame me.
Oi vey, I can hardly believe this is finished. rubs eyes This was so long for a one-shot. Ugh, anyways… This was kinda just to warm up my HP skills for a longer H/D fiction I have planned…if this one gets reviews, of course. Things in the end didn't come out exactly like I wanted them to, but I guess I was just to creatively drained from 13 pages. Jesus, who writes a 13 page one-shot? Anyways, Harry turned out a bit too OOC for my taste, and I wanted the whole "speech" thing to be mostly sexual, but I decided that it would be even more OOC for him to be like that. The dialogue at the end was a bit rushed, but I had pretty much screwed the ending over that I had thought out originally with the changes I made…which is ironic, because the ending was the original idea for the fic.
But anyway, if reviews for this go well, I'm writing a series about some lesbian yank who comes to Hogwarts and teaches him about being himself (AND I DO CERTAINLY NOT MEAN THAT HE'LL GO ALL SCENE IN THE FIC BECAUSE OF IT!! Scene is like, punk/goth/emo/etc etc for those of you who don't know. Because those fics are just annoying) and how he has all that power in his fame and such. confetti Don't worry, I don't like original characters either, so the girl really won't have that much of a part, just a plot bunny. But anyways, it's of course going to be H/D. Then maybe a one shot about a horny Draco, Nyquil, and two angry mobs trying to prove that Draco kidnapped Harry/Harry kidnapped Draco. The mobs being Gryffindor and Slytherin, of course.
And possibly (very slim though) a sequel.
Enough from me review please!