Gandalf Got Run Over by a Balrog
A parody of "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer"
By: Eleniel
Disclaimer: The original chorus, Gandalf got run over by a balrog…, is not mine. I read it on the Mellon Chronicles yahoo group, but I couldn't find the message and I'm not sure who it belongs to. The credit is theirs, not mine. Also, I don't own Grandma got run over by a reindeer or LOTR. Come on, people; you oughta know that by now.
Gandalf got run over by a balrog
Walking home from Moria one day
You can say there's no such thing as balrogs
But as for me and Frodo, we believe
He'd been smoking too much pipeweed
And ran out on the trail
But he forgot his staff and cloak
And couldn't find his way back out the door
When we found him the next morning
At the scene of the attack
He had claw marks on his forehead
And incriminating burn marks all around
Gandalf got run over by a balrog
Walking home from Moria one day
You can say there's no such thing as balrogs
But as for me and Frodo, we believe
Now we're all so proud of Elrond
He's been taking this so well
See him there reading scrolls
Drinking miruvor and singing loud
It's not the same without Gandalf
All the Elves are dressed in black
And we just can't help but wonder
Should we open up his pack
Or send it back?
Open it!
Gandalf got run over by a balrog
Walking home from Moria one day
You can say there's no such thing as balrogs
But as for me and Frodo, we believe
Now the turkey's on the table
And Gandalf's favorite pig
And the red and silver candles
Would have matched
The jewel on his ring
And his grey hair
Now go warn all your friends and neighbors
They better stay away from balrogs
What rock would give a license
To a beast made out of fire
And dark shadows
Gandalf got run over by a balrog
Walking home from Moria one day
You can say there's no such thing as balrogs
But as for me and Frodo, we believe