Diamond Sky

Chapter Seven: Retreat

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"No, absolutely not. Guests do NOT wash up after dinner."

"Friends help friends wash up after a scrumptious and delicious dinner. Aren't I your friend?"

"You are my friend but also a guest. Guests do not wash the plates and silverware after a meal. That's called courtesy."

"Helping to wash up is also common courtesy."

"Daidouji-san…"

"Hiiragizawa-san…"

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Nakuru rolled her eyes as she stood by the sink in pink rubber gloves and scrubbed a plate with a sponge. "For goodness sake, stop arguing like an old married couple over who gets to wash the dishes!! Come on already!!"

Spinel, who was sitting on the counter, quietly snickered. "I'd let Tomoyo-sama rinse if I were you, Eriol-sama."

"Come on, Tomoyo-sama!" urged Nakuru impatiently.

With a satisfied smile at Eriol, Tomoyo went to the sink and rinse off the already soaped up cutlery. With a sigh, Eriol glanced at Spinel. "Why is it that when it comes to dishes, I never seem to win?"

"Well, considering that you can do almost anything and everything, this may just be one of your very rare disadvantages." Answered Spinel smartly.

He raised an eyebrow at that and lowered his voice. "And I thought I told you to be polite to her."

"I am being polite!"

"Tomoyo-sama?"

Spinel smirked and reverted suddenly to English. "((Judging by how often you've mentioned her in almost every conversation you have with me and Ruby, I'd say that Tomoyo-sama is polite.))"

"((She's a friend, Spinel. A good friend.))"

"((And friends, Eriol-sama, should not be so formal with each other.))" Spinel raised an eyebrow. "((Ever consider calling her Tomoyo-san?))"

Eriol kept quiet as he watched Nakuru and Tomoyo laugh at something. "((It just… doesn't seem right.))"

Spinel looked at his master for a minute before shaking his head. "((I thought you had gotten over Mizuki-san.))"

"((I have, Spinel… but…))" He looked at the tiny guardian. "((Daidouji-san isn't like that. She's a friend. Not someone to look at like that.))"

As Eriol looked back to the sink, Spinel continued to look at him, sharp eyes watching every tiny move his eyes made. Jumping up onto Eriol's shoulder, the small guardian shook his head again.

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"((Your lips say that but your eyes tell a different story, Eriol-sama.))"

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The dark eyed youth smiled slightly. "…help me straighten up the living room, will you? She needs to do her homework there."

Spinel got the hint. "Yes, Eriol-sama."

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"It's nice to have another girl in the house again, even if it's just for one night!" said Nakuru as she wiped the plates and glasses dry.

Tomoyo smiled. Nakuru had insisted she call her 'Nakuru' and nothing else otherwise she wouldn't answer. "It can get rather lonely in here, can't it?"

"Yeah… but Suppi-chan and Eriol-sama are fun to tease so it isn't so bad!" beamed Nakuru.

Tomoyo giggled as she gathered the silver forks and spoons together. As she placed them in the drawer, she blinked in sudden realization. Slowly, she looked up at Nakuru who was putting the glasses in a cupboard.

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"Nakuru… what happened to Mizuki-sensei?"

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It was a good thing Nakuru had already shut the door of the cupboard or she might have dropped another glass. She looked at Tomoyo for a minute, considering lying before letting out a sigh.

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"Well…"

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One of those experiences was the reason why he was leaving his home in England.

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A smile that didn't reach his eyes grew. It had been almost two years since he and his ladylove had discovered that slowly, they were falling apart.

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It was not due to anyone's faults and follies; Clow Reed was far too old not to have seen every single sort of folly there was and not understand. It was just that love, as so many people whether magical or not had found out in their lives, wasn't predictable. It just wasn't.

He still cared for her. Very much so. But it had quietly shifted into a love that depicted Kaho as someone he wasn't willing to bring into his life as his life's partner or the one that occupied the space in his heart reserved for such a love. He loved her, he had realized one day, as Mizuki Kaho, an equal, a trusted friend… a most beloved sister.

Kaho realized this as well even after Eriol dismissed such preposterous thoughts and had said nothing to her. She had gently taken him by the hand and asked him if she had no longer become someone he needed by his side. Asked him if he didn't love her any longer in that manner.

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He had tried protesting, tried to deny it, tried not to believe himself and his thoughts.

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But Mizuki Kaho excelled far too much in reading his thoughts and heart.

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It had been his eyes, said Kaho after he had admitted that to her and to himself. It had been his eyes that had given him away. He no longer glanced at her in the same way he did before. The love was there, yes. But not the kind that struck the heart and ran even deeper into the soul. With a gentle smile, Kaho softly held his pale hands.

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"The truth is, Eriol… I don't think I look at you the same way as well. I love you, Eriol. I do love you… But not as I once did."

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They had spent hours just talking calmly to each other, wondering what had happened, wondering if they could have done anything to change this. In the end though, both came to a conclusion that they hadn't done anything but try to love each other with all of their hearts. Nothing they did would have changed this outcome.

So, with a final kiss and low voiced goodbyes, Kaho left his dwelling in England, moving off to some other part of the world. Eriol had remained in his home, listlessly spending his days painting and numbly thinking of nothing. It took a year and plenty of support from Spinel and Nakuru to finish his acceptance of his lost love. That and ongoing correspondence from Kaho informing him on where she was and how she was doing. Her supportive messages of how she'd always care for him made him feel compelled to be strong enough as well to keep replying and also encouraging her when she seemed to be down.

His last letter though told her that he was returning to Japan and would try to resume a normal life there.

She'd responded two weeks later wishing him all the best.

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I'll continue to write as regularly as I can, Eriol, that I promise you. And always remember I'm here for you if you should ever need me.

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Love,
Kaho.

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"Eriol-sama felt so guilty because he thought he lied to Mizuki-san. Truth is he didn't lie. He just tried to keep going. Both of them tried very hard… but it just didn't work out no matter what they did."

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Nakuru shrugged helplessly. "I guess that's why he decided to come back to Tomoeda. To be honest, we're all better off here than we were in England."

The moon guardian suddenly realized that Tomoyo had been very quiet. She quickly looked at the girl.

Tomoyo had a thoughtful, attentive expression on her face. "…does Mizuki-san still write to him?"

"Um… well…" She hesitated, half knowing what was going to happen and truly not liking the imagined end.

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But she just couldn't lie at the look on Tomoyo's face.

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Helplessly, Nakuru nodded. "We get her letters about twice a month. But they're mostly about normal things. She's in Germany at the moment."

Tomoyo nodded and smiled. "I see. Thank you for telling me, Nakuru. I think I'll go do my homework now."

"Tomoyo-sama…" She placed a hand on Tomoyo's shoulder and looked at her concernedly. "They're more brother and sister than anything else."

Tomoyo smiled in a slightly puzzled manner. "Of course, Nakuru. I know."

Despite still being rather nervous, Nakuru smiled and took her hand off Tomoyo's shoulder. "Okay then! I'll go make some uh, drinks for you and Eriol-sama!" At her puzzled look, Nakuru winked.

"Eriol-sama put off his Japanese essay for some reason or another."

Tomoyo smiled. "Thank you for the drinks, Nakuru."

As she walked through the doorway, Nakuru bit her lower lip.

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She had a bad feeling that Tomoyo's smile had been forced.

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It was nearly nine when Tomoyo completed her homework. As she set down her pen on the coffee table, she looked at Eriol who had finished his about ten minutes earlier and shook her head.

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"You know, there isn't any need for you to grin like that just because you finished earlier than I did."

"I'm not grinning at that. I'm grinning at the fact that you've taken two cups of Nakuru's iced tea and still haven't gone bouncing off the walls."

Tomoyo laughed. "It isn't as bad as that, Hiiragizawa-san. Somehow you exaggerate a lot when it comes to Nakuru and Spinel-san."

Eriol was about to reply when a crash resounded from upstairs.

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"ERIOL-SAMA!! SUPPI-CHAN POURED STRAWBERRY JAM ALL OVER MY NEW CLOTHES!!"

"WHEEEEEEEEEE!! Dancing with the caaaaanaaaaaaariiiiiiies…!!!"

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Eriol raised an eyebrow at Tomoyo.

"Well… maybe not a lot…" Tomoyo smiled. "But they care a lot about you."

"I know." He smiled with a sigh. "If only they'd care enough not to try and make each other drunk every day."

Tomoyo grinned. "I'm sure you drive them crazy at times."

"Ah, that I do. It's what family does I suppose." He smiled. "Now that you've finished your homework… do you plan on leaving?"

"If you'd like me to."

"No, of course not," replied Eriol immediately. "You're welcome to stay for as long as you like."

She smiled. "That's very kind of you. But my mother's in Spain at the moment so my curfew is ten. And she usually calls around that time to check on me so… I had better leave early."

"Well, you've an hour." Eriol smiled. "If you want to stay that is…"

Tomoyo glanced at the clock then turned back to him with a smile as she got up from the floor and settled into an armchair. "…if you don't mind, I think I'll stay for a while."

Eriol grinned with delight.

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The next hour passed by with schemes on how to get Chiharu and Yamazaki to blurt out the plain truth about each other.

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"You know what… somehow I don't think they actually need to say anything."

"Oh? Why is that?"

"Well… they've been a twosome for so long. Perhaps they just know already." She smiled. "You can tell, behind all that lying and smacking, they know how the other feels."

Eriol smiled. "I see…"

Tomoyo watched the focus in his blue eyes suddenly wander and she grew quiet. She could tell as a fond smile appeared on his face what he was thinking about. Just as he came back to the present, she quietly spoke.

"…Hiiragizawa-san."

Eriol sensed the quietness in her voice and immediately sat up. "Daidouji-san?"

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She had looked at her hands in her lap. "I mean no offense but… were you thinking of Mizuki-sensei?"

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The silence that resounded in the living room for a minute made Tomoyo look up and sent a jolt of surprise through her. In one of those rarely seen moments, Eriol looked shell shocked. He stared at Tomoyo for what seemed like a year in a mixture of what appeared to be disbelief and horror. But he quickly regained his composure in a moment and the horrified expression became one of resignation and quiet acceptance. But he still kept his eyes on Tomoyo, never leaving her face.

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"Did Nakuru tell you what happened?"

Tomoyo shifted in her armchair to sit nearer. "It wasn't her that told me… I asked... I'm sorry. It's just that I was curious. I've been curious for some time but… you never said anything so I thought it best not to ask…"

He sighed, finally looking away. "…yes. Yes, I was thinking of her."

Tomoyo winced inwardly at the sadness in his tone. "I, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"It isn't any fault of yours, Daidouji-san." He leaned back in his sofa, breathing a sigh. "It wasn't anyone's fault in fact…"

Tomoyo didn't know quite what to say. She didn't dare say anything else for fear of hurting her friend. So she just kept silent and watched him. All sorts of emotions seemed to flash across his expressive eyes behind the pair of glasses.

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It was him who spoke at last, breaking the rather uncomfortable silence. "It is painful… knowing you cannot love someone as you told them you could. It's just as bad as knowing that the other doesn't love you as they once did. You think you're lying when you whisper tender words. You feel as if you're watching yourself perform on a stage… like you're detached from yourself, watching a play you're starring in. Like a hazy dream."

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He smiled sadly. "Then one day, you realize… the play is over. You need to stand up and go home. You need to wake up and open your eyes."

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Tomoyo looked away from him, focusing on her hands again. "But… you still remember the play. You still remember what was wonderful about it." She smiled at him. "Is that why you and Mizuki-sensei still keep in touch?"

He nodded. "She's sort of my neechan now. I love her dearly in that manner and she loves me as she would a beloved, younger brother. But the both of us know very well the production is over. Nothing will bring the play back to life as it once was." Eriol settled his eyes on her once again.

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"Both of us have taken our bows and gone home."

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Tomoyo tried to match his gaze but could only look away again and back at the table where her books sat. Her eyes travelled upwards to where a round clock hung. The hands showed 9.40.

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"…may I borrow your phone to call home?"

Eriol had followed her gaze. "Of course."

"Thank you." Getting up from her armchair, she crossed the room to where the phone sat on a small table.

Eriol watched her as she dialed the Daidouji house. So… now she knew.

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And if he was correct, he had just burned down a bridge that he hadn't dared to cross over.

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"You're leaving already!?" shrieked Nakuru.

Tomoyo smiled apologetically. "My curfew is ten o' clock."

"Oh… okay." She brightened. "You can come visit again, right? Please?"

"I'll try, Nakuru." Her eyes shifted to Spinel Sun who was drunk on sugar and now was doing a Tare Panda imitation on Nakuru's shoulder. Shaking her head, Tomoyo stroked his head. "Bye, Spinel-san."

"Guh-byeee…" He hiccupped. "Come again, Tomoyoooo…!"

She smiled and turned to meet Eriol's smiling eyes.

"I'll wait with you."

"…alright." Giving a last wave to Nakuru and Spinel, she and Eriol walked to the front door. As the main door closed, Spinel's eyes sharpened and he hovered off Nakuru's shoulder.

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"((You HAD to tell her about Mizuki-san, didn't you?))"

"((She ASKED!! What was I supposed to do? Say, "Mizuki-san who?"))"

Spinel rolled his eyes. "((Let's just go see what's happening. It doesn't help that our beloved master's not about to take anything further…))"

"((What?! But Tomoyo-sama's got a nice ring to it!!))"

"((...good grief, you actually have a good point.))"

"((Hey!))"

"((Will you just move!!))"

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Outside, both Eriol and Tomoyo sat on the doorstep. It was cloudy that night, and the glow of the new moon could barely be seen. Still, whenever the clouds deigned to move, the moon hung there like a lone beacon in the dark. There were no stars though to surround her tonight.

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"It looks so lonely there, doesn't it?" Tomoyo looked questioningly at him as he smiled. "The moon."

She looked up again and smiled. "She does."

"…you know, Daidouji-san, both of us haven't kept our promise today."

Tomoyo turned to him, her mind running through any promise she had made with him.

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His blue eyes gleamed with what Tomoyo had deemed 'suspicious intent'.

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"Whenever we see each other, we'll remind each other to smile for real. What do you say?"

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Tomoyo looked at his outstretched pinky and with little hesitation, wrapped her own around his. "Deal." She beamed, for real this time.

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"…you're right." She shook her head. "I guess we can't help ourselves, can we?"

"No… we can't." He smiled, a touch of irony in it. "We're hopeless causes."

She chuckled. "Smiles just can't be rushed. But we can always hope."

Eriol looked at her. "Perhaps we just need a reason to smile for real."

Tomoyo stiffened slightly. Her mind was already warning her not to look at the eyes. Don't look at the eyes. DON'T look in the eyes. DON'T-

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Crap.

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One thing about Hiiragizawa Eriol was that once you looked right at his eyes, you needed a few minutes to try and swim out of it. And if you didn't get yourself out quickly, you either wrenched yourself out with a great deal of effort or hoped he looked away.

(Thing was, Eriol was not about to look away since he had accidentally thrown himself into Tomoyo's own eyes as well and was struggling to get out himself.)

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But as she looked at the twin pools of blue that didn't have a bottom, Tomoyo feltsomething she never expected to feel around this boy.

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Scared.

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It was just this strange feeling surging through her at the gentle expression in his eyes that scared her since she had a large suspicion that she knew what it was. The knowledge that this had been growing for the past few months was not comforting.

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She had never been a leading lady and she didn't think she could ever be one.

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And from the way he was looking at her with regret in his eyes, he knew that as well.

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"Hiiragizawa-san," she began, still unable to look away. "Will you promise me something?"

He nodded. "Anything in my power."

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With a shaky smile, Tomoyo took in a deep breath and held out her pinky finger. "Always friends?"

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"… Of course, Daidouji-san." His smile didn't reach his eyes. "Friends. Always."

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Just as he wrapped his finger around hers, there was a sound of a car pulling up. Releasing her finger, Eriol looked at the driveway. "There's your ride." He murmured.

She nodded wordlessly. "Thank you for dinner."

From behind the door and at a slightly opened window, Eriol's guardians watched their master walk their guest down the driveway.

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"…did I just hear what I heard?"

"Yes."

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There were two resounding smacks as both Nakuru and Spinel slapped their foreheads in unison.

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Eriol was greeted at the door by two highly annoyed glares. Sighing, he allowed himself to be dragged into the living room and thoroughly berated for his lack of bravery when concerning Tomoyo-sama. Well, Spinel at least just offered a sarcastic remark once in a while. Nakuru seemed to be on a roll, waving her hands wildly and declaring that she had never seen such an act of spinelessness from him of all people!

When they were finished, Eriol went into the kitchen and spotted Tomoyo's present. Unwrapping it, he smiled.

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A slice of kiwi topped cake.

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Spinel hopped up onto the counter. "((Why are you afraid of trying?))"

"((I don't want to hurt her.))" answered Eriol in a low voice as he closed the box. "((This is as far as she wishes to go. So this is as far as I will go.))"

"((Eriol-sama, you never hurt anyone if you can help it.))" pointed out Nakuru with a concerned frown. "((You're still blaming yourself, aren't you?))"

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"((…I don't want to make the same mistakes. And I will not drag her into something she doesn't wish to be involved in.))" He looked up sharply at them. "((As far as all of us are concerned, Daidouji-san is a true friend. Nothing more, nothing less.))"

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"((Yes, Eriol-sama.))" answered both Nakuru and Spinel as they watched him put the cake in the fridge. Bidding them goodnight, Eriol headed upstairs to bed. Nakuru and Spinel remained in the kitchen, not trying to kill each other for the moment.

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She looked at the tiny sun guardian. "((Is it just me or does Eriol-sama always have a habit of lying to himself?"

"((For once, it's not you.))" Deadpanned Spinel.

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Disclaimer: Card Captor Sakura (c) CLAMP.