This fic… is not sane. It's short, strange, and… Wel, not quite strange on the level of "A Peek into the Bizzare Mind of Me", but it's definitely different. Seto will be extremely ouf of charater: you've been warned. Here goes nothing:

P.S.: This is a one-shot. Don't expect any more. Luv yaz!

-

"Good morning Mr. Kaiba." His secretary chirped as he passed her. He ignored the greeting and proceeded to his office, locking the door behind him. He opened his laptop, pulled out a USB cable and connected the portable computer to his PC. He switched both of them on and began typing almost immediately.

Indeed, workaholic Seto Kaiba did as any ordinary CEO would. He reviewed finances, reports, budgets, memos…

He checked the firewall, then double checked the locked, soundproof door. He smirked.

On his computer he pulled up Internet Explorer.

"Www dot neopets dot com… "He muttered as he typed it in. The colorful page popped up. Almost immediately he pumped a fist in the air with a triumphant shout.

"UNI DAY! FINALLY!" He clicked over to the marketplace, checked the Neopian times, and skimmed the stores for any deals. He played a game or two, naturally scoring high scores on each attempt. He checked his bank account and his pet, a blue Uni, and then logged off. "Next up: Hogwarts!" he cheered softly. "www dot hexrpg dot com… Bingo! Daily galleons, ooh… Someone cursed me! I'll get them back for that… Pumpkin juice, right?" He nodded to himself and continued 'working'.

-

"I'm sorry, sir. Mr. Kaiba is working very hard to resolve the dilemma! Good bye… Kaiba Corporation, Kaiba's office. Can I help you?… No sir, you'll have to call Marketing. Please hold, I'll put you though… Kaiba Corporation, Kaiba's office. Can I help you?… Of course sir, I'll make sure he get's the message… No, I can't give it to him instantly, he's working right now…"

-

Seto finally navigated towards Yahoo's Launchcast. He decided that today was an alternative day. After waiting a moment for the Alternative Rock station to load, 45 began blaring from his speakers. He briefly thanked the contractors who completely soundproofed his office, and began dinging along as he brought some reports back up.

"Nope! Not today Mr. Stupid! I'll NEVER agree to your idiotic treaty! Buh-bye!"

Jus then the phone rang. He quickly paused the music, put on a straight face, and picked it up.

"This had better be worth my while." He said callously. He could almost hear the other person cowering. He smirked with satisfaction.

"M-Mr. Kaiba, sir, I'd like to inform you th-that the purchase was a success. Kaiba Corporation has acquired the rights to the Pac-Man game. A recall has been issued and all arcades will have to re-purchase the machines from us." The man said.

"Good." Seto said as he hung up. Then he grinned like a boy.

"YIPPEE!!" He cried, pushing his chair back so he could spin around in it. He did so until dizzy, then he stood and walked to the other end of the room, staggering like a drunk. He pulled from a cabinet a bottle.

"I must celebrate!" He said happily, uncorking the bottle and swigging down a huge gulp of the intoxicating substance.

"Ahh… I wish I had some milk to go with this, though…" He gazed longingly at the Hershey's Syrup bottle in his hands before hugging it.

"I LOVE YOU!" He cried before placing the bottle delicately back on the shelf and closing the door. He returned to his seat and spun around some more before returning to serious work.

He pulled up a complex looking file and began skimming numbers and doing calculations, giddy grin still on his face. He made a mental note to 'test' their new acquisition soon.

He returned to his work diligently until another distraction appeared: he forgot to turn his music back on. He did so just as the last notes of the song faded. The next song elicited another cheer.

"All day, staring at the ceiling making friends with shadows on my walls… all night hearing voices telling me that I should get some sleep because tomorrow might be good for something… but… I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell…"

He sand at the top of his lungs, heedless of the e-mail alert he just received. Once he finished singing he became abruptly aware of the petite figure who has entered and closed the door behind her.

"What do you want, Mazaki?" He asked, slightly red.

"Er.. You didn't respond to my e-mail immediately… you usually do.. I wanted to make sure you were okay…"

Seto glared daggers at his secretary. He shrank back a bit.

"I'm perfectly well, Mazaki. Your concern is unwarranted. Get back to your job before I fire you."

Anzu nodded meekly and left. Once outside, though, she began giggling… "Not crazy my foot."

Seto took a deep breath and calmed down. He glanced at the screen.

"WATER COOLER WIT! YAY!" He pumped a fist in the hair happily and proceeded to laugh hysterically about a complex computer programming joke. "The…hehe… the directories! Hehe… the wrong directories! Hahaha!! The idiot, hehe, how could anyone mistake iomanip1 for an explosive name? Hahahaha!!"

When he calmed down from that, He decided to surf the web. He went and checked the TV schedules.

"YES!! YES YES YES!!!" He began jumping up and down like a possessed schoolgirl, squealing madly. "HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN! HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN!!!"

He failed to notice Anzu entering again.

"Mr. Kaiba?"

"HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN! HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN!!"

"Mr. Kaiba??"

"HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN! HIS HAIR FALLS DOWN!!"2

Anzu quickly exited the room and picked up the phone. "Domino Mental Asylum? I've got someone who needs to be picked up… Yes… Something about someone's hair falling down… Yes, same as usual… Alright. Thank you."

(The time it takes to restrain a hyperactive CEO and drag him to a mental institution later)

"…Do you get Toon Disney here?"

"…"

Fine

1 Iomanip is in fact a computer programming thing. It is a library function used in the C programming language. n.n I feel smart.

2 Inspired by a good friend of mine… you know who you are, mental woman!