Author's Notes: Yay! Update. Enjoy!

Chapter 3

The second half of the class consisted of Duke, standing on top of the newly repaired (and newly reinforced) desk, happily blasting at the class with rapid stupifys, The students were supposed to dodge the spells and then stand up and cast an expelliramus at Duke. If someone failed to try and stand up, they had points deducted. And for every successful spell cast against the professor, that student would get five points for their house.

No one gained any points that day. Pansy Parkinson gained a sprained arm and Crabbe cracked his head while evading by jumping right smack into a desk. There were several others that also needed to go to Madame Pomfrey before class mercifully ended.

During a brief break, Hermione got curious - once she caught her breath.

"Professor Cadukus, what house were you in when you went to school?" She asked, her face still flush from the most exercise she had since the rescue attempt a year ago.

"Heh, I didn't go to Hogwarts." Duke said with a grin. "They wouldn't take me. Something about how the sorting hat does not…. react well to people like me."

The massive professor leaned in towards Hermione and whispered the words 'Endless screaming', loudly enough that the rest of the class heard also. Most of the students shuddered at the thought of what the hat would find inside Duke's head.

"So where did you go, professor?"

"I went to Vincentine Acadamy."

"The school for socially maladjusted wizards?" Draco said, smiling. "Didn't your uncle go there also, Goyle?"

"Oh yeah!" Duke said. "How is ol' Stubby?"

Goyle growled, but did not say anything.

"That's right! I heard he had finally regained the use of his legs enough to walk." Cadukus said. "He tried to kick me in - well - a sensitive place and so I shoved him through a wall, legs first."

"He fell forty-five feet!" Goyle finally growled out. "It was the fourth story outer wall made of solid stone!"

"Yeah… it sure was." Duke smiled, as if remembering a fond memory. He suddenly looked concerned at the glare Goyle was giving him. "What? You think I should have taken him to the clocktower?"

No answer followed, so the evasion lessons started up again.

The rest of the day for Harry, passed in a haze of pain and soreness.

All of Harry's muscles ached like they were on fire as he fell onto the couch in the Gryffindor common room. Harry suspected that there were muscles he didn't even know he had that now hurt because of all of Duke's 'training' - if that was even the right word for it.

"I almost wish Umbridge was back. At least no one got taken to Pomfrey's while writing scrolls." Ron said as he also rested as still as possible in a large cushioned chair.

Harry looked at his hands, remembering his detention where writing scrolls DID hurt. "Cadukus is the anti-Umbridge. Can you imagine him giving a speech about the theory of Defense Against the Dark Arts? It would probably go something like: 'Enemies bad! You need to bash enemies into paste! Now, theory time is over!"

Ron laughed and immediately wished he didn't as his many sore muscles made themselves suddenly known. "Can you imagine him and Lockhart trying to co-teach? After each demonstration, Lockhart will probably be trying to cast memory spells on himself to forget about the pain."

It was Harry's turn to laugh, then hurt.

Hermione arrived from her last class and collapsed on another chair. "There should be a law against having Duke's class at the start of the day. Sometimes I think it would be safer to let Lupin teach - during a full moon!"

"I bet that to defeat dark forces, all you need to do is have them attend our class for a few months." Ron stated. "Maybe Harry could convey the torture back at You-Know-Who through that Oculmancy thing he is learning from Snape."

"Oh no!" Harry got up despite the pain. "My Occulmancy lessons! I need to get to the dungeon!"

"That's right! Hold on, Harry." Hermione said. "I ran into Snape on the way back and he had a message for you."

A feeling of dread suddenly came over Harry. A feeling which was soon justified.

"He said that you are having the lessons with Professor Cadukus now."

Potter swallowed nervously.

Hermione continued, "You better hurry. I don't really want to think about what the Professor will have you do if you arrive late."

Harry started running.

Bonus Scene: (Maybe it will appear later, maybe not! The suspense….)

"Listen, Harry. You don't have to worry. All I want is to have a few words with your guardians. That's all." Duke said as he and his student walked past the row of identical houses in the fading light of a late afternoon.

"I've dealt with these kinds of people before, and I learned that it is all about how you phrase things to them. Your wording, your actions, and your appearance are all very important in these kinds of situations." The massive, armor-clad man said while stalking up to the place where Harry spent most of his life. Cadukus paused right before rapping on the door. "Even the way you knock can have an impact on these kinds of dealings."

With that, Duke punched a massive black and chrome armored gauntlet through the oaken door and casually ripped it off its hinges.

To say that the Dursleys were surprised was like saying the sun was a tad warm and a bit larger than a breadbox.

"I'm one of Harry's professors that would like to have a little talk with you." Cadukus said as he stalked over to the table where, until mere moments ago, a family were having a peaceful dinner. "By the way, nice to meet you, Mr. Bloatly, I'm the Duke."

"That's Mr. Dursley, and the Duke of what?" Vernon sputtered.

"The Duke of PAIN, Bloatly. And how about we have this little talk face to face?" Cadukus said.

Vernon Dursley was not a small man, either in height or girth. Although he never talked about it, Harry estimated his weight at about 150 kg (330 lbs). That is why Harry was so shocked when Duke grabbed his uncle by the neck and lifted him up to his face with only one hand.

"Now listen and listen good to what I am about to tell you, Bloatly. Harry, here, has been prophesized to either defeat a very murderous dark wizard, or die trying. Now, I heard how Potter has been spending his summers and I'm a little concerned that his environment is not the most conducive to effectively learn how to channel his magic. Magic that could save his life."

"Now if Harry does not study or relax properly during his off time, he will not win the battle. And once he is dead, Voldemort - the Dark Wizard, will come here to kill anyone who had anything to do with keeping Harry from him for so long. Does that make sense?" Duke did not wait for an answer as he continued.

"Now, more importantly, I will be a little bit upset if all the time I spent teaching Harry to defend himself and survive is suddenly wasted if he dies. If these events should, for some reason, transpire - I will come here to have a little more than a few words with you and your family. Then I will leave. And by the time Voldemort arrives to kill you all, it will be a MERCY KILLING as you will all be begging him, with as much movement as you can muster of your broken bodies and souls, for the sweet release of DEATH! Do. You. Understand?"

Vernon Dursley answered him by wetting his pants. Duke just tossed him on the floor, and grabbing Harry lightly on the shoulder, led both of them away outside. Moments later, the door jumped back on the hinges and repaired itself like a video being played in reverse.

Petunia Evans Dursley, quite understandably, chose that moment to faint.