The author appears on screen and says, "Thank you all for reviewing!! Even though some of the reviews were….yeah, sorry that I haven't written in a while, school, laziness, procrastination, no motivation. I just couldn't think (stupid writers block…..). Ok I have a request to advertise cherry blossoms (the name changed to the wandering soul) fic called 'crazy news cast', it's a humor Zelda fic(GO READ IT AFTER THIS!). And now for something…….nonrandom, this is going to be the last chapter. I'm sorry, but 7 chapters is about all my head can think up. Anyways don't let that put you down, it's Christmas!!" the little voice in my head says, "no its not!" "Well its close enough, but this chapter is going to be a Christmas special. And sorry for anyone who thought that having pepto bismal poured down their throat is evil, I had to get rid of the stupidity virus somehow, and since yall are in my fic, I can do whatever I want!! Muahahahahahahah!!"
"Ok ON WITH THE STORY!"
CHAPTER 7: The REAL Way Out
disclaimer (why is this here?):
I own a whole lot of nothing, plus some more nothing, and don't forget! I own nothing!
Last on this story, bus was watching TV and the author was in a fetal position rocking back and forth. But he got reviews now so he's up watching TV with the mole people. And everyone else is also asleep. But they wake up, and they see jack being stupid again. So FF says, "WHY ARE YOU BEING STUPID JACK?!?!", or yells. "I'm not being stupid, I'm being no smart." Then CB says (man I hate this style of writing), "whoa, those big words for you jack" "no they ain't" so H says, "they are" "they aren't." so KS joins this argument, "yes they are" "NO THEY NOT!!" CN joins, "YES THEY IS!" and we have to let Km join this too, "YES…….THEY……..ARE!!!!!!!" Km hits jack on the head. Bus jumps in, well he rather just yells in, "GET BACK TO FINDING THE WAY OUT!!" "WHY DON'T YOU JUST USE YOUR INTERNET AND FIND US A WAY OUT!!" "NO, CAUSE THAT WILL END THIS CHAPTER TOO SOON!" "CHEESE!" Everyone looks at jack, who just yelled out cheese, "what?"
Ok, time to interrupt the story
the crowd cheer
i glare at crowd
the crowd gets scared
Ok, the stupid writers block has taken over me againpoints to a writers block inside his brain ok, this chapter will now be cut shorter, and end quicker than I planned it to be. Now back to the story
FF says, "hey, I've been wondering bus, how do you get internet service?" bus reply's, "well, I hacked into jack's account, so he now pays for it. I hooked antennae on the authors head" "that's why my head feels so heavy…." "yeeah, well, that's how I get internet service, satellite TV, XM radio, and other things."
FBI people blow up a hole I the roof of the cave and then repel down the rope they threw, and lock up jack. "you haven't paid your satellite TV, internet, XM radio, and other things bill in 7,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 minutes!!" "what!?!? I don't have any of that!!" "well, your getting billed for it, so come with me"
So the FBI agent lights up the cavern, and everyone sees they are in a small room, that's 10' by 10'. So H yells out, "WE'VE BEEN WANDERING IN A ROOM THAT'S 10' BY 10' FOR YEARS?!?!?!?" "yep." everyone falls over anime style.
So they all leave the cave, jack pays the bills. And since it was Christmas when they came out, they all went to jacks house for a party.
(another interruption)
I lied about this being short
I'm adding the Christmas party, cause its almost Christmas!!
"WHOO-HOO! PARTY!! YIPPEE!!! FREEDOM!!!!" that's what everyone was shouting when they got out of the cave. So they go to jacks house, and watch him pick his yield of yellow sweet potatoes, green tomatoes, brown corn, blue cabbage, and some other multicolored mystery plant. "ummmm, I ain't eating that" is what CB said. "yeah, neither am I", is what CN said. "nor I", is what the rest said(too many people to go through).
So they put up a tree, after having it fall on Km 20 times, and having the dog pee on it, and after having jack pee on it, and the cows pee on it, and after we burned that one and put a new clean one up. So they sing, badly, Christmas carols. They sing them off key. They drink too much eggnog. KS gets ran over by a reindeer. Santa comes by and gives everyone something, and gives jack a lump of coal big enough to be seen from space.
"hey Houston, there's this big black dot right on jack's farm." "well, destroy it" "roger, over and out" so they destroy jack's lump of coal, and everyone is happy, "yaay"
and so, cause the writers block has fully taken over me, I end this story by sending everyone back to where they belong, and by blowing up jacks farm, so he can't endanger more people by growing rotten fruit.
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here ends the story, of jack and his fun day in the cave, if you out right hated this story, please say so, if you are in this and you hate what I did to you, well tough luck. I am the creator of this fic and you must obey my rules!!! Go read the wandering soul's story, "Crazy News Cast" NOW!! And leave a review for ths story.
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