John knew that this was wrong. Neither of them was thinking right. It took all of his willpower to push her off of him.
"Jesse, I said that I can't do this." John stood up off the bed. "We can't keep doing this little dance."
"What are you talking about? John two months ago you told me that you wanted me and now you don't." Jesse paused as something popped into her head. "Are you seeing someone else?"
"No," John shook his head. "How can I when you are the only girl that I want." He walked over to her. "Jesse we need to talk about our relationship or there lack of."
Jesse shook her head and sat on the edge of the bed. "I guess it was stupid of me to come here, you tried to politely end things at the arena. I'm sorry John."
"Jes, why do you have to do this?" John walked over to her and kneeled in front of her. "I just want to talk. People in a relationship do that all the time. It doesn't mean that I want to end things."
"John, what I am supposed to think? You told me that you were letting me go and then you won't even kiss me back. I know I screwed things up by leaving you and you don't know how sorry I am because of that. Can't we just go back to the way things were?"
"No." John answered simply. "You were right about something you said. After what happened with Mark I didn't trust you anymore." Jesse looked away. "I was still going to propose to you because I knew that you are meant to be with me. I've known it from the day I met you." John paused. "I think that you leaving was what we really needed. I've come to terms that you aren't going to be there when I get home and that I am not going to wake up next to you anymore. Jesse you made that decision to leave all on your own without thinking how it would affect me."
Jesse nodded and stood. "I understand." She headed toward the door. "Maybe you can call me sometime and we'll hang out."
John watched as the only women he ever loved walked out the door and out of his life again. He kicked himself in the ass for letting her leave, but he was certain that it was the right thing to do. He felt a little closure by this encounter, but there were a lot of things that he still wanted to tell her. John wanted her to know that he was always going to love her and that he hoped they could work out in the future. John knew that they both had to do a little more growing up before they could be in that kind of relationship.
John laid on the bed thinking about what he was going to do now that things really were over between him and Jesse. The whole time she was gone somewhere deep down he knew that she would come back to him. Now that she had come back to him, he wasn't sure if he was ready to have her again. There was so many problems that they needed to work through and he wasn't sure if he could do that right now.
John closed his eyes and tried to get some sleep. About thirty minutes later his cell phone went off. Groaning he picked it up and looked at who was calling him.
"I don't want to hear it Hass." he said.
"John, you have to get to the hospital right now."
John sat up. "What's wrong, who's hurt?"
"Look, Jesse called me and she was crying and I heard her scream and there was a loud noise and the phone went dead." John was too shocked to speak. "John they don't know if she is going to make it through the night."
John grabbed his keys and ran out the door not bothering to close it.
I decided that something big had to happen now. I hope that you liked this chapter. I will be going home for Christmas so I don't know if there will be another chapter before then. Please let me know what you think.