Playing with Fire
Chapter 3: Too little, too late
Thank you reviewers.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything.
I haven't updated much, or at all, lately I've been so addicted to reading other people's story that I completely forgotten about my own. Let's hope this is a good chapter and let's hope the number of reviews dramatically increases. Or increase just a little bit. The point being, R&R.
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Step. 1. 2. Step. 1. 2. His rhythmic steps rang through his mind as the pure adrenaline ran through every inch of his body, the blood rushing through his veins, and the thumping rate of his heart increasing slowly one by one.
His footsteps slowly drowned away as he reached a bench in the park, slowing his pace and coming to a stop as he tried to calm his breathing, he opened the bottle of water he once held in his hand and pulled its content over his head. The cool liquid, drenching his hair and his face as tiny drops of water ran down his cheekbones towards his strong jaw. Shaking the water out of his hair, the young man inhaled before picking up his feet and running again.
He couldn't believe how early it was or why he was at a park running instead of lying within the warmth and comfort that his bed provided. And as he sped up, the pain burning in his legs was forgotten, the chill of the wind on his face was discarded, and the wetness of his soaking shirt was put aside and what was left was the building temptation to take a detour.
He needed to get away from the order of his life, he wanted change, and he wanted to not be the person outside looking in. He wanted to understand what contentment was. While the clouds darkened, he continued running, his eyes a dull shade of gray were not the shiny silver orbs they used to be and as the rain poured over him, he continued running. He ran until the burning sensation in his legs spread throughout his body and he was so lightheaded that the mere thought of continual was painful. But that didn't matter, pain was only the beginning.
Rui would have stopped, he could have stopped before the slow rhythmic steps once again faded out, but his heart yearned for one look though it was only a glimpse. Rui came to a stop just off of an abandoned house. Its tall walls, standing proudly, loomed over the houses near it. His eyes searched for some kind of movement, some kind of evidence that it was indeed not trapped in time. But all he got in return was an eerie silence, and as the wind blew open the gate, it swung back in place, the hinges squeaking loudly.
So the wind blew and the gate squeaked, and Rui stood there, lost in his own thoughts when he saw someone coming down the road, towards the house. He turned, his face clouded in passiveness, as he stared blankly at the figure. And before he knew it, he was facing a beautiful woman, her hair swept into a bun, her shoulders pulled back, showing the traces of the proud woman she must have been in youth, except now wrinkled and weary, time clearly had gotten a somewhat better hold on her.
She smiled kindly at him, though it seemed stiff, a smile was a smile but her smile was not returned, instead he turned to leave. His footsteps echoing, filling the silence reigning over the two, until there were no sounds left except the pattering of the rain when Rui suddenly stopped dead in his track, his eyes widening in shock.
He turned, the thunder roaring above his head, the woman with her umbrella, tipped low enough to cast a shadow over her face, showing off all her seriousness in the matter. "What did you say?" Rui asked disbelief in his tone.
She only smiled, "You heard me. I know what you want, I know the secret, and I hold the key to that lock." And she turned, walking away but he managed to catch up with her.
His tone, masking the curious glare brushing past his eyes, "What do you know?"
"Uh-uh. I can't give you that information without something return." She smirked, her eyes wrinkling at the edges.
"What do you want? Money? A job? Expensive houses?"
"Come on, Rui," She stopped, pondering her words so that the information she was about to give away would hit him hard enough, "I'm sure Kara taught you better than that. Wasn't it your mom's saying that material things wasn't important?"
And he paused, gulping slightly, "What do you really want? How do you know my mother? How do you know my name?"
And she smiled, "I know more than you think. In fact, I know more about you than you ever will know about yourself." With that, she beckoned towards a car, the driver quickly getting out, opened the door and bowed, respectfully.
She smiled, stepping into the car, "Here," she gave him a small card, "call me after you think this through."
Then she left, leaving Rui staring after her car in surprise, the card in his hand.
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"Is that all you can do? Sit there like a lost dog, waiting for its master?" He yelled gruffly, running his hand through his hair, "I don't have time for your fucking whines, suck it up, and don't cry in front of me! Oh god! I don't want to see you."
She didn't reply, and as she heard him storm away, the stench of alcohol and sex immersed within every ounce of his being, she looked up. Then slowly, she cleared the table, the tears still streaming down her face.
Yuuri stopped when she felt someone tug the hem of her skirt, "Mommy, what happened? Why is daddy so mad?"
She didn't reply, what she did in reply of the innocent question was hugging the little boy standing in full height at her knees. She pulled him closer and closer towards her, tightening her grip on him until she could hear him inhale a large amount of air.
"Mo...mm…y?" He managed to let out in between large gasps of air.
"Soujirou, my baby Soujirou, will you promise to never disappoint me?" She asked lovingly, tightening her grip as her nails dug its way into his skin and she heard him gasp in shock because of the pain.
Pulling him away slightly, she looked up at him, love and tenderness filled her eyes, and Yuuri dug her nails deeper, "Will you ever disappoint mommy Soujirou?"
He replied by shaking his head and then she loosened her grip on his arm, hugging him caringly and comfortingly, "I won't ever disappoint you either."
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Soujirou's cute smile ran through his face as he stared up at his mom, who was happily stitching a picture of a scarlet ibis on a piece of fabric. "Wow, mommy, it's so beautiful."
She smiled, but then flinched, and the young boy looked up at her worriedly, "Are you okay, mommy?"
She nodded her head, "Soujirou," she started, staring blankly ahead, "have you ever been pricked by a needle?"
He shook his head and she smiled, "It's surprising and yet, the pain comes in extreme for an instant and it melts away until you can't feel it at all. Until you forget that anything even happened."
Her voice slowly drifted away, her eyes cloudy as she stared blankly ahead, like lost in a trance. Was she still talking about needles? He didn't know, but he wasn't so stupid as to think that the hint of regret in her voice was because of a needle.
"Do you want to know what it feels like?" The little boy didn't reply and as he felt her burning gaze turn towards him, he timidly nodded his head, "Here, give me your finger."
And she pricked him, letting the blood run out of the little wound down his finger and she touched her finger with his. "Now, we are one." She smiled like nothing happened between the two and even though the tears had welled up in his eyes due to the sudden pain, he smiled.
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A boy of 16, Soujirou lounged carelessly along the halls of the silent house, its eerie surroundings resembled that of his parent's relationship. He closed his eyes, breathing in the heavenly smell of tea as it ran through his senses, calming his nerves. His eyes opened wide when he heard the rushed footsteps of his mother.
Her hair a mess and her dress clinging loosely to her body and his eyes coldly stared at her petite form. She shakily reached her hand up to brush his face, in turn, he knocked it away. She gasped, screaming, "What are you doing? You promised, you promised, you bastard, you promised me."
He could only dumbly stare at her until her shoulders shook with sorrow, the tears running down her face as she pointed an accusing finger at him, "You promised me. You're just like him, I hope you both die, I hope…"
Then she fainted, her outburst getting the better of her body, and as she fell backwards to the ground, he reached out to block her fall. Watching her limp body heavily pulling him down, as her neck fell backwards.
He let the maids run to her side, injecting a small amount of antidote into her body before nodding his head and beckoning them to leave him and his mother alone. Once they were out of sight, Soujirou picked her up, carrying her towards the garden wing of the house, where she usually stayed, where his dad had locked her. Soujirou found himself almost towards the room when he stopped, his conscience getting the better of the situation than his common sense.
Heeding his conscience's orders, he brought her to a gazebo in the garden where they spent most of his youth, him laying in her lap as she sang to him. The coldness and distantness slowly faded out of his pupils as he lovingly tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ears.
The moment he moved his hand away, he could feel her nails on him, grabbing a hold of his wrists. "Soujirou," she quietly whispered, "honey, how are you? I haven't seen you in a long time. Where were you?"
His smile faltered and he sadly put the mask back on, "I was at boarding school remember, mom?"
She pouted slightly, getting out of the sun bed where he had laid her, "Mom? What are you too old to call me mommy?"
He cringed his nose, "Mom, I'm 16."
She smiled back, getting out of the sun bed, and walking towards the garden, "Come along now, I have something to show you."
His mother turned and smiled back at him the way she used to in his youth when she had a surprise for him, like the world was their secret, but now, all her surprises brought along the side of her that he didn't want to face and the medication just didn't work like it used to.
She was falling and he couldn't hold onto her anymore.
Soujirou nodded quickly, following her, because he had promised to never disappoint her, no matter what happened. And he didn't like breaking his promises. He wouldn't treat her like his father did; he wouldn't treat her like the rest of the men in her life did. He, her son, would be different. He would be her salvation.
Slowly as the seasons changed so did his mother, he saw less of the woman she really was, instead he constantly faced the women she could be. When she screamed herself awake every night in her sleep, he would stay near her room, listening to her, tears in his eyes, choking sobs shaking his body.
Then when he knew she was sound asleep again, he would tiptoe over her room and watch her sleep, his lively eyes slowly dying with her. He would kneel down and hold her hand in his, he would whisper, "Don't worry, mom, I won't leave you."
It was almost peculiar how as the rest of the things in his life changed and grew, his mother never did. She stayed beautiful, light-hearted, unlike the things around her. As the roses she once planted in the garden withered and died, she remained youthful, like she was immortal. Never to change and never to hurt, a flower without thorns.
That was what he wanted to believe. It was what he hoped and prayed for. All he could do now was hope, there was nothing left. There wasn't any finality in that hope, he could hope and cry all he wanted but deep down, Soujirou knew he was losing against death.
The woman lying on the bed wasn't the woman his mother was, she wasn't the woman his mother was supposed to be. This woman seemed battered, old, fallen, and he couldn't accept it. So as his mom got worse, Soujirou disappeared more. The days withered and died, and he didn't show up, not to hold her hand, not to whisper into her ear when she slept, not to tuck the loose strand of hair behind her ears. To the world, Soujirou had let go of his mother and as he grip loosened on her, so did her salvation.
Soon, she was in her bed, not eating, not sleeping, her medicine having no effect on her and she waited. Her anger, hate, and sorrow brimming in her eyes as she waited for a husband that would never come home and a son that had given up on her.
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His footsteps pounded the floor of the hallway and it echoed loudly through the eerie silence and he stopped just in front of her door. He had promised not to disappoint her, he had promised himself that he wouldn't be like the other men in her life but he was never there. Now, because of his own insolent spite at the fact that he was losing her, at the fact that her sickness had gotten the better off her, he had left her. Alone.
Now, he would make up for all those nights he wasn't home.
He tentatively opened the door, making sure not to wake up the peaceful figure within the room, but she was awake. Her hair falling down to her sides, in large waves, as she turned to face him. Her eyes hollow while she smiled, the age and weariness in her face gone, like some miracle happened and his mother had returned.
Her smile brightened as she let out a soft "Soujirou" before reaching out to hug him, forgiving him for letting go of her. The moment he approached those arms of warmth and comfort, he found himself awake, beads of sweat on his forehead.
Soujirou turned wearily to his side, looking at the clock, it was 3:00 AM, he then turned to face the girl sleeping naked next to him. He looked disgustedly at her, before picking himself up out of the bed and putting some clothes on. Soujirou trudged out of the hotel room, closing it silently and soon he was wandering in the streets.
Two years had passed and within those two years, he had lost all connections with his mother. She was still there but he avoided going home, avoided seeing her.
The rain poured as he continued walking, and the light ruffle of leaves as they slowly fell down to the ground got Soujirou to look up at the sky, and once he did, his eyes widened. It was a crescent moon, the first of the whole month, and his eyes searched for a star, always to the north and on the left of the crescent moon, but this time, he couldn't find that bright star. Instead what he found was the small dimming light in its place.
It was his mother's star and something told him, something beckoned him to go home. Before he knew it, he picked up his slow footsteps, sprinting madly for the direction of his house, praying slightly in his head that this wasn't an omen. The moment the huge gates come into view, Soujirou sprinted madly, at inhuman speed for the gates, pushing them open and eventually pushing the door of the house open. He continued his swift pace towards her room, his heart pounding, his footsteps echoing loudly through the house.
The room was at the end of the hall, silent and calm, like his mother, and without another thought, Soujirou pulled opened the door, hoping that his mother would be sitting there, like in his dream but he couldn't find her. He wanted to see her, sitting at the gazebo in the garden but disappointingly, she wasn't there. 'Soujirou, Have I ever told you how much I love that lake? I wish I could be by this lake forever.'
The memory came back almost instantly, he closed his eye and breathed calmly, his brain told him not to go to the lake, his instinct told him not to but he pushed both out, walking slowly onto the deck, until he was standing on the deck, closing his eyes as though mustering up strength to open them.
Soujirou's eyes opened and he moved forward to look down into the water and what he found would haunt his dreams forever. Amid all the water lilies was his mother, her beautiful hair floating next to her face, her eyes closed peacefully and her dress clinging to her body. Without a second thought, he jumped into the lake, grabbing her body and hugging it close to his as he pulled her onto the ground.
Tears ran down his face as he held onto her body, sobbing like the lost little boy he really was. Under that manly confidence and that to kill for smile, Soujirou was just a little boy. His tears didn't stop and they streamed down his face onto her pale one, the two stayed like that for the rest of the night. Soujirou crying, his mother dead, limp in his arms.
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"Call Yuki in here." The older man sitting behind the desk grumbled his voice hoarse as he slammed some files onto the already messy desk. A light knock on the door and he turned his head up enough to see her face, she smiled tentatively upon seeing his glare/
"Sit down." He ordered, nodding at the chair facing his desk which she willingly took. "You're not the best, fuck, what the hell am I saying? You are not the biggest cop, but hell girlie; you're the best on the team."
She nodded, tiredly, hand holding her cup of coffee, "I think you should get to the point, sir."
He grumbled again, throwing her a tired glance, "I've got an undercover case, it's not much right now, but if you get more evidence, we could throw in a whole team."
She laughed, yawning slightly, "Is this about the murder of James Smith? He is an American ambassador-"
"Residing in Japan, the government won't let us off the case until we know who killed him. Damn those Americans, they'll be on our asses, accusing us of mistreating their ambassador, or worse, they'll think its one of 'us' who did it."
"I understand, so as of this moment, I am…" She started lamely, beckoning him to give her the files containing her new identity.
"Miki Yaishawa, 23. You just check up on the last bit yourself. Remember, no guns or weapons, nothing risky, I just want background information. I want you to head off to your new relocation address immediately, so go home and pack your bags."
"Hell, go home and pack my bags? You have to be fucking kidding. Start right away? You could have said something a few days earlier sir, I can't just move into a new house." She grumbled before snatching the file and bowing briskly heading out of the room and eventually out of the building.
Still mumbling obscenities under her breathe, the petite girl made her way down the street, headed for home. What she didn't know was that this small case would be one of the most important cases of her life. What Yuki didn't know was that, somewhere down the road, deep in the net of truths and hidden secrets, she would have a few confrontations that just might change her forever.
Sometimes in life the truth is just right under our noses, other times, it's just about a mile away. Literally.
As Yuki walked home, a tall woman sipping coffee harmlessly across the street watched her silently, a smile turning at her lips. 'She's all grown up. I never expected her to look so much like her father.'
The woman then stood up and threw a stack of bills on the table and walked away, hugging her coat to her slim figure, a smile still dancing at her lips. It had been years and yet, she still hadn't forgotten the little girl. Who would have thought the little child would still be alive? She was a cop at that, 'Oh very much like her father indeed.'
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It's all just introductions; I think I'm in for more than I bargained for, this story might just take me forever. The inspiration is always limited so I'm asking for reviews; something about those little notes of encouragements always help the brain.
Questions I will answer though all these chapters have just been background and introduction. Everyone in this story has a story of their own, I have yet to tell much of Rui's or Tsukasa's or very much any other characters, except Tsukushi's and Soujirou's had been almost completely told. Why Soujirou? I don't know, I guess it's because of cuddled-milk's story. God bless her, she's a wonderful author.