The Mask
When
the music stopped
His form crept into my vision
My Angel of
Music.... is a man!
Not the bodiless form that he had lead me to
believe in
But a real man in living flesh!
My heart swelled
with happiness
For this meant that I didn't have to worry
About
him disappearing into the heavens
But, my heart sunk
Who was
this man?
He obviously knows all about me
He knows that Papa
had promised to send the Angel of Music
Down to me when he
died
Otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to teach me
He knows
my thoughts, my feelings,
My fears
Yet... I know nothing about
him
Oh, this is so confusing!
Should I trust this man?
Who
lied to me,
Yet helped me fulfill my wildest dreams
He is
waiting for me, hand outstretched
Looking at him, I see that he is
wearing a hat
That covers half his face
He is dressed in
evening clothes
Like he is going to the Opera
The most
startling thing about his appearance
Is the gleaming white mask
that hides the other half of his face
Why does he feel that he
must hide his face from me?
My curiosity gets the better of me and
I put my hand onto his
He gently closes his fingers on my hand and
starts to pull me into the
darkness
I panic, as the reality of
the situation hits me
He sings
Transfixed, my body gradually
loosens up
He continues to sing a haunting melody
Beautiful
words, despairing melody
I become drunk on his voice
He leads
me effortlessly through the labyrinth
I become drowsy, my eyelids
begin to droop
Suddenly, I'm in his arms, without a single
faltering note
Giving evidence of his extra burden
I lean my
head against his shoulder
Soon, the gentle vibration from his
throat puts me to sleep
When I awaken, I find myself in a long
boat
Groggily sitting up, my eyes meet his
I lose myself in
those gentle yellow orbs
Searching for the man whom I knew as my
Angel
We stayed like this for what seemed like hours
I, looking
for an Angel
He, looking for a glimpse of hope
It is broken by
my question
"Angel, where are you taking me?"
Still
gazing at me with those catlike eyes
He sighs before replying
"To
my house."
Now I realize that he is rowing across a lake
A
black, glossy lake
With huge, white candles lighting the way
He
is studying my face
Trying to decipher my reaction at this
But
I keep my expressions as masked as his face
"Who are
you?"
Again, he sighs before answering, but this time
It
seemed to come from the depths of his very soul
"I am
Erik."
I detect a twinge of fear in his voice,
As if he is
afraid that I will reject him
Though I know I should be wary
I
find myself inching towards him
"Were you my Angel?"
He
stops rowing,
Looks at me with deep sorrow,
As he replies,
"I
was your Angel, my dear Christine,
I do hope that I can continue
to be your tutor,
Even if I can not be your Angel any longer"
He holds my gaze as I contemplate his response
His eyes held a
beseeching look
Begging me to forgive him for his deception
Asking
to give him another chance
I will do anything to hear his voice
again!
But I want to know what lies beneath that mask
Its very
presence infuriates me more than his deception
Why must he hide
from me?
I reach out, he takes my hand
"Christine, you
must never look beneath the mask
For those who do, remain here
forever, never returning
To the world above"
His touch is
bitterly cold
I shudder and jerk my hand out of his grasp
He
picks up the oars
Rows at a fast pace
Until we reach the
dock
He leaps out, graceful as a cat
Moors the boat, gives the
rope a final tug
Making sure that it is secure
Then stands,
waiting
I realize that he is facing a dilemma within
He wants
to act like a gentleman and offer his hand
But is afraid of my
earlier reaction to his cold touch
I stand, unsteadily and begin
to walk towards the dock
I am almost there, when suddenly the boat
wobbles dangerously
My arms fail, I feel my body falling
My
mouth opens to emit a shocked scream
When a pair of arms slips
under mine
Lifts my body out of the boat
Onto the dock next to
Erik
I instinctively cling to him
Trembling from head to foot
For unbeknownst to him
I didn't know how to swim!
He stands
still, tensely
As if he doesn't know how to react
I whisper
reverently
"Thank you for saving me,
my angel"
I
feel a gentle pressure on my back
As he lightly touches my
hair
Whispers in my ear
"Anytime, mon chere"
I
cling to him, afraid of falling into the water
He gently traces
the outline of my hair down to my backbone
All too soon he says,
breaking the soft moment between us
"It is getting quite
chilly. Come,
let me show you my home."
He leads me
toward a dark shadow
I stay close to him
My childhood fear of
the dark
Striking my grown-up mind
Makes me tremble, quake with
fear
After a few clicks, we are inside
His house is pleasantly
warm
Numerous candles light it
Covered in glass, to prevent a
fire
I take this opportunity
To get a closer look at my host
He
is tall, skinny
Yet has an aura of power around him
His choice
color this evening is black
He takes off his hat and bows to
me
Showing thinning black hair
And the majestic air around
him
As he causes the cape
To flourish magnificently around his
body
His eyes never leave my face
I start to feel weak
My
knees begin to shake
The left half, the uncovered half
Is
contorted with concern and compassion
While that right side, the
masked side
Cold, unyielding to feeling
Remains expressionless,
except for his eyes
"What is the matter, Christine?"
I
feel lightheaded
Why do I feel this way?
I can't look away from
that mask
It's teasing me, taunting me
I begin to fall
again
Erik catches me, carries me to a sofa
I grab his shirt,
refusing to let him go
He looks at me, bewildered, frightened
I
peer into his eyes, study my reflection
He is breathing
heavily
"Christine,"
I let go, he inches away
I
sigh, close my eyes
"Angel, why have you brought me here?"
He
kneels, looks at the floor
"You shall learn that in time
It
grows late, my dear
Would you like me to sing to you?"
I
nod my head, and close my eyes
As his voice takes over my
senses
When I awaken
I find my self in a huge bed
With
red flowers all around
It takes a second for me to realize where I
am
I recall the previous night's experience
Realize I'm still
in the gala dress
I stretch, step out of the bed
My eye finds a
piece of parchment
On an expensive writing desk
I pick it up
and read the red ink
My dear Christine,
You shall find some
dresses
In the closet
Feel free to help yourself to whatever
you choose
I have gone to run some errands
I shall be back
shortly
Take this time to bathe, get dressed
And prepare
yourself for your voice lesson
Sincerely,
Erik
Like a robot,
I follow his instructions
True to his word, there were
several
Expensive dresses
All tailored to fit my exact
measurements
A door to the left showed me
A very nice
bathroom
With a marble tub
And several expensive
soaps
Perfumes, brushes, hair things
Fit for a queen!
After
bathing, I put on a blue dress
Let my hair fall down my back
I
hear three soft taps on the wall
"Come in"
Erik
emerges through a door
That my wandering eyes had bypassed
He
carried several long boxes
Places them on the bed
Turns to me,
draws in a breath
"You look wonderful, Christine"
I
blush, look at my feet
"I hope you slept well"
"I
did"
I fiddle with my hair
Unsure of what to say
"Are
you hungry"
I looked up, nodded
"Come with me,
Your
breakfast awaits"
He steps aside,
Waits for me to go
first
I find a table, filled with numerous
Breakfast items,
with tantalizing smells
I sit down, Erik sits across from me
I
help myself to a little of everything
"This is very good!"
He
smiles, blushing slightly
"I do have other talents
Besides
singing, Christine"
I questioned him on his past
He
patiently answered all my questions
I discovered that he was
fluent in over 30 languages
That he helped to create the Paris
Opera House
How he was a magician
He told me many fascinating
tales
About his journeys through many countries
Yet, I sensed
that he was leaving parts out
Terrible memories of the past
For,
sometimes, he would sigh deeply
After telling a tale, as if the
memory hurt
After finishing my breakfast, I asked
If he was
going to eat anything
He replied, with a dark chuckle
"I
have already eaten, my dear.
You don't have to worry about my
well-being"
Perplexed, I asked if I could help with the
dishes
He quickly answered no, and started clearing the table
I
rose, and walked around, studying the many paintings
Of castles,
fields, storms
In the corner, is a huge organ
Wandering over, I
lightly brush my fingers over the keys
I notice several music
sheets with red notes dotted everywhere
I picked one up and read
"Don Juan Triumphant"
This must be a composition of
his
I hum the tune, it is very complex
Filled with numerous
feelings
I start to sing the words
"What are you doing"
I
jump, startled, drop the score
He picks it up, looks at me
"How
do you like my Opera?"
I look at him, wondering what he was
thinking
That white mask, glinting in the candlelight
"I
like what I've seen. Will you play it for me?"
He sits on the
stool, sighs that heavy sigh of his
"That is one thing you
can never ask me to do.
My Don Juan burns, Christine. It would
make your
Heart quake. Your soul is too innocent, too pure
For
my Don Juan."
I am insulted
I turn my back on
him
Whispering furiously,
"How come I am so innocent,
so
pure, that you can't even show your face?
How gullible do you
think I am?"
I hadn't meant for Erik to hear me,
But he
did.
"I have told you, Christine
the consequences of
seeing my face
Once a woman has seen my face, she can never
return
To her world.
You have no idea how many have seen,
How
many have perished soon after."
I whirl around, to find that
he was standing directly behind me
There is an unmistakable look
of anger in his eyes
I become nervous, but I can't stop
myself
"How do I know that you are going to let me back
up?
How can you expect me to trust you
When you hide your face
from me?
It seems like I already don't have a choice!"
Before
either of us could react,
I tore off his mask and dropped it on
the floor
I don't know which was worse
That first horrible
sight of his deformed face
Or the howl of anger and pain
That
he emitted when I backed away
"Oh you foolish girl! Why? Is
this what you wanted to see?
You think I'm quite handsome, eh?
This is what the mask was hiding!
Did you expect an angel's face?
What a surprise this must be for you!"
I cowered in the
corner, trying to hide myself from his rage
He stood over me,
yelling, cursing, weeping
He fell to the floor, weeping at my
feet
"Christine, why? Why? Why? Why couldn't you leave my
mask?
Why did you have to see?"
I was weeping as hard as
he was, squeezing my eyes shut
"I tried to warn you! I tried
to protect you from this!"
I felt so horrible at what I had
done
I had no right to snatch his mask off
I slowly lifted up
my head
He was still unmasked, tears running down his sunken
cheeks
From the gaping sockets where his eyes rested
Now I knew
why he hid from me
There are numerous scars, possibly from hard
labor
I wondered, how could a person's face
Be deformed so
hideously
As his?
I wasn't prepared for something like
this!
Overcoming my repulsion,
I stretch my hand out and gently
brush his face
He jerks, looks at my hand bewildered
He must
have never felt tenderness
Towards his deformed face before
My
heart tightens as I think of what horrors
He must have had to
endure because of his face
"Erik!" I cried
"Show
your face without fear!
Whenever I shudder at you
It will be
from sheer awe
At your genius!"
He breaks down,
Weeps
at my feet
Takes the hem of my dress
Kisses it
I hand him
the mask
"You don't have to hide from me
But I realize
that you might want
To hide from the world
Though they are
missing
A great opportunity
To meet a great man
And
experience his works"
He looks at me, bewildered
Yet,
there is an unmistakable shine in his eyes
A glimmer of hope, a
sparkle of happiness
That someone could see past his face
And
see the real man that he was.