I would like to thank Black Scarab and Sir Mocha for their reviews.
Scarab: I don't think I stole it from there, but I could've... Most titles arise subconsciously/from popular phrases/my favourite line from the story. If I saw the title I probably remembered it. ::sighs:: Anne Rice is just hard to read...
Sir Mocha: ::blushes:: Thank you! And no, the prologue wasn't supposed to make sense. Most of what I write doesn't. And it was not mean - it was setting up for this Interlude! See, I get Yami to explain what happened. And this will probably be more confusing than the prologue... I think I confused myself while I was writing it... And I'm glad you liked the KC part. I'm considering having a few more scenes set at Kaiba's wonderful little nut house.
This chapter - while not essential - is just Yami explaining what the hell happened with Yugi in that last chapter. THERE WAS A REASON IT WAS AMBIGUOUS!!
Interlude One: By Myself
What do I do to ignore them behind me? / Do I follow my instincts blindly?
Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams / And give in to thoughts that are maddening?
Do I sit here and try to stand it? / Or do I try to catch them red handed?
....
Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin / I make the right moves but I'm lost within / I put on my daily facade but then / I just end up getting hurt again.
Yugi's grandfather suspects. I saw it in his eyes as I left him. He does not know what he suspects, but he knows something is not right with his grandson.
I cannot say it surprises me. My skills as an actor are not worthy of mention.
I close Yugi's bedroom door and just lean my head on it for long moments, trying to control the trembling. I was not lying; we did fall. But it wasn't an accident.
I move towards the mirror and look at my face. I have been... managing, I suppose. Yugi does not suspect. I have been trying to protect him since we returned from the Duellist Kingdom. It has become... quite an effort... to stop the strain showing on my face, in my manner. It was a relief to just act ridiculously with Yugi this evening, letting myself relax. The pizza would have been a benefit. It is one of the few things I can definitely state a preference to.
That was why they got as far as they had, actually getting through me to Yugi. I was not concentrating, and Yugi paid the price.
Ever since Duellist Kingdom, I have been feeling something scratching at my mind. At first, it was just a slight pressure, there and gone again before I could really notice it. I understand now: they were checking my strength, "testing the waters" I believe. But, as I wandered my chamber, I found evidence that all was not well. Scratches against the stone, the mortar crumbling away in some places. Someone was trying to get in from the outside. They have become bolder as the days pass, attacking the walls directly. I have managed to hold them off, but it takes most of my strength to hold them back and repair the walls.
I do not want to think of what I would see if the walls go. I doubt I would survive it.
But I must hold them off. If they give up on me, they will attack Yugi. I will not allow that. I must protect him from them, from the shadows with the knives.
And the nightmares.
Shadowy figures, knives, blood. I do not understand them, but they scare me. They seem... familiar in some way, as though I have seen these figures before.
Spirits do not dream. The closest things we have to dreams is the thoughts of our... vessels. It seems unkind to think of Yugi as a mere vessel, but it is what springs to mind. Yugi's thoughts and fears are the closest I have.
The only way I can dream is if Yugi is dreaming and I invade them (which I would not do. I have usurped his body. I refuse to do the same to his mind), or... or...
Or if someone is sending me the dreams. Sending them as a message. Or a warning.
If all this is a warning, then the threat must be astronomical.
I lie our body on the bed, to tired to bother with removing the clothes - and my hands are shaking to badly to unfasten the buttons and buckles. Yugi was not harmed. If he had been, I would have followed my attackers, and dispensed justice as I thought fit.
The fate I gave to Kaiba's darkness and the man who attacked Téa would look like nothing compared to what I would do if they hurt Yugi.
But as for me? They attacked with black lightning. They cracked the wall of my soul room from floor to ceiling. I have shored it up with Shadow Magic, and will have to fix it tonight. It had hurt, crashing through me like a tidal wave. For a moment I was nearly washed away, but I had to protect Yugi, had to stop them getting to him...
I throw myself out of our body, leaving it lying on the bed like so much discarded clothing. It was one of the few perks of a spirit sharing a human body. Yugi may be bound to it; I am not. I can wander where I will.
I am tired, but to restless to sleep. I feel calm now, but I'm too angry to go back to my Soul Room.
Yugi might have felt the backlash, might have sensed the amount of Shadow Magic I used to repel them. I hope he did not. I may have killed the first few who tried to come through the crack, and definitely killed the ones who were standing in it when I slammed the walls back together. It would prey on his conscience.
What can I say? I was angry; to have my mind intruded on twice by strangers, once by people who came ready to attack me. Shadi may have intruded, but he gave a reason, and didn't attempt murder. Pegasus reading our minds was not much of a violation compared to having someone intrude on your very soul.
Yugi felt guilty about me nearly killing the man. I felt nothing: emotions are one of those things that you find are connected to having a body.
My thoughts are disjointed, skipping from one topic to another. I can't seem to stay still.
I run my hands through my hair, and look at Yugi exasperatedly. Since I left, he has resumed control, and is sleeping peacefully. He is lucky. I feel I might never sleep again.
Yugi smiles at me, rolling onto his side in his sleep. He shivers a little, a pale echo of my own trembling, and I try to pull the blanket up over him. My hands float straight through it, and I growl under my breath. I have become so used to assuming Yugi's body at my whim that I have forgotten what it is like to be a spirit.
I give up and start pacing the room. I run my hands through my hair once more - and I am on my knees again, clutching my head, watching the shadows advance on me again, knives drawn, a strange chant filling the air and the dim light flickering across golden blades and strange symbols and impassive faces...
For a minute I think it's another attack, catching me while I am still weak and reeling, and I respond accordingly.
Yugi jerks up as I lash out with a Mind Crush, staring around blearily. His waking drags me out of the nightmare, and a new possibility enters my mind for a moment.
I dismiss it, then plant my hands on my thighs and soothe Yugi through the mind link. He seems reassured by my prescence, my voice, and dumps his boots on the floor and tucks himself into the bed. Within moments, he is asleep.
I check, using the mind link, just to reassure myself, and find that Yugi's sleep is dreamless. I would be jealous, but I cannot. I am too tired, too angry, too filled with unreal... adrenaline? Whatever it is that is pumping through my ghostly veins, waiting for them to try again.
I rise, slowly. I do not think I can continue like this much more, but I must. Yugi is depend -
I freeze, staring in the mirror. It is low down, but large, and I can see myself perfectly.
I am... crying?
I walk over to the mirror and touch it numbly, as though this could just be a trick of the light.
It is not.
Blood trickles from the corners of my eyes, staining my cheeks. I'm weeping blood from all three eyes.
Three?
Yes: the puzzle around my neck is weeping as well, the thick red liquid pooling and spilling across it's surface, much as it does on my cheeks.
I stand and stare at my reflection, then raise a hand up to touch my cheeks. The blood smears on face are there, not fake, not illusions, not something that I need to use Yugi for.
I cannot cry. I cannot feel. Once I leave Yugi's body, once I ensconce myself into my soul room, I have the same amount of emotions as a statue.
Perhaps that is why I do not care. Perhaps that is why I simply stand and watch the tears fall, indulging in the feeling that this is real, even to a spirit, and let myself weep.
That was... weird... Anyway, constructive criticism? Please?