Chapter Eight – The First Cut Is the Deepest
'Doctor Martin to the ER STAT, Doctor Alex Martin to the ER STAT.'
Alex had been hoping for five minutes at least to speak with Mark, they hadn't had a chance to talk much since he had returned to work late that afternoon, but now he knew it wasn't to be. He'd heard Mark's name being called, and then his; he guessed they were in for a long night.
As he turned the corner towards the ER Alex saw Mark, who appeared to be on the phone, and Shannon heading towards the ambulance bay, and increasing his stride a little he followed them.
"Mark, why are you coming this way?"
He saw the older doctor jump at his words, and realized, belatedly, that his arrival had been unnoticed.
"Alex, it's Steve in the ambulance, and Rae with Jesse." Mark's words were a little shaky, and Shannon lightly touched his arm.
For a moment Alex didn't want to think. If they were here in the bay then maybe Mark thought Steve wouldn't make it to the ER. "It's bad, isn't it, Mark?"
"I think so … the EMT said that Steve … Steve lost a lot of blood at the scene, wherever that was, and Jesse needs to see Doctor Yung, his therapist. I called her on my cell phone, but she isn't home, I … I don't know what else to do."
Alex was alarmed to see that Mark was so uncertain about his responsibilities and he hoped that once their patients arrived he would click back into doctor mode. "You said Rae is with Jesse, so he isn't alone?"
"Alex, Honey, I spoke to them and all they said was that Steve was in one ambulance and Doctor Travis and his wife were in another." Shannon had moved across and gently taken his hand. He had shivered slightly, wondering whether it was her fingers that caused it or the draft as it whipped up his white coat. He didn't think he'd actually waited right out in the bay before, but this time he didn't want to be any place else.
The first ambulance arrived, and Mark was immediately the consummate professional. As the doors were opened it was clear that the patient was Steve and, knowing that he needed to treat either Jesse or Rae, Mark just looked at his son, trying to ignore his pallor and the amount of blood on his body and then quickly kissed his forehead, thankful that he knew all those around him well enough to be able to do so. "Take care of him, Alex; he's in your hands now."
Alex knew that the comment hadn't been intended to put pressure on him in fact he realised that it had the opposite effect. He felt honoured that Mark trusted him enough that he would let him treat Steve when he was so badly hurt, and confident that he could do enough to save him.
"Report." Alex looked at the EMT nearest to him, he knew his name was Jim, and he listened intently to his words.
"We have a forty-five year old male, Caucasian, Steve Sloan; he has deep wounds to his right arm, causing arterial bleeding. Pressure dressings have been applied, but breathing is shallow, heart rate ragged." By the time Jim had finished speaking they were at the door to the trauma suite and as they were pushed aside Alex and the two other men entered the room. Steve was placed next to the gurney Alex would use and the two nurses in the room moved closer to the beds.
"Ok, on my mark … one, two, three … mark." Steve was moved, gently but swiftly and then, with a nod in their direction, Alex dismissed the EMT's and forgot them instantly, although their words still reverberated around his head.
"He's in shock, I want two large bore IV's, on his left side, with lactated ringers, two units of O neg blood stat, type and cross-match him for another six units of whole blood, check his records too. Get him covered up and his feet raised, let's move it!" Alex had been delighted to see everybody jump at his words and, his concentration at its highest level; he began to try to save his friend.
Mark had watched as Steve was wheeled away and then he saw Rae getting out of the next ambulance, and as she saw Mark her eyes filled with tears. She moved to stand with her friend, put her hand out and Mark smiled at her.
He made sure that he held her hand in his, not tightly, but with just enough pressure for her to know he was listening to her.
"Mark, help him, please. He didn't know what he was doing … he couldn't have known, please help him, I need him back …" Her tears slid down her cheeks then, and she covered her mouth with her other hand, and Mark, still having no idea what had happened, just nodded.
The phone rang insistently in the Walter's ranch, where everyone was asleep. "Someone needs to get that." David's sleepy voice floated out towards no one in particular.
"Oh, for goodness sakes, can't anyone else hear this monster?" Debbie pushed up her sleep mask, leant over her fiancée and picked up the phone, her eyes looking skywards. "Walters Ranch … Well, hello, Mark, how's every little thin'? … Oh, my, an' are they all alright now? No … no, I know that she'll be just devastated … I'll be sure an' tell her, an' I just know she'll be right on home… Mark, you give that poor chil' my love, now, y'hear?"
Once he had the epinephrine flowing into Steve's system, Alex had sent his patient to the OR for the surgeon on duty to stitch the wounds to the arm and the veins. He'd arranged to have him transferred to the ICU, knowing that Mark would sit with him all night, and keep an eye on his condition, but Alex recognised, with a heavy heart, that Steve might not make it that far.
Jesse had, according to the message Shannon passed to Alex, been treated in the ER by Mark, and he had arranged for him to spend what was left of the night in a private room, no doubt with Rae watching over him, but first Alex had insisted in checking her over too.
He moved into the trauma suite, where Rae was sitting covered in blood, and obviously at least mildly shocked. As soon as Rae saw him she began to shake and tears started to fall. "Alex, where's Jesse, did Mark look after him? I asked him to, and Steve, he lost so much blood, Alex, I helped, I did what Jesse told me to … but he … he did it … Oh, God, Alex, what's wrong with him? What's wrong with my Jesse?" Rae lost control of herself, she began to rock on the bed, and Alex wondered whether he would have to sedate her.
"Nurse?"
"Doctor, Mrs Travis has been severely traumatised, but she has no injuries."
Rae was still getting worse, she was losing herself in the panic and even though Alex was used to getting through to Rae in emergency situations this time he knew that unless he reached her very soon he would have no chance.
"Jesse, no, Jesse, he … he kissed someone else, and … oh, God, Alex, why did it happen? I … I don't understand."
Alex looked round and saw Shannon coming out of the elevator, and he realised that she had accompanied Mark to see Jesse to his room. "Nurse Farley, could you please come here?"
"Yes, Doctor." Shannon smiled as she got closer to him, but that was all, they would keep their relationship totally professional, as they always did when working together. For a minute or two they conversed and then Alex moved back over to where Rae was lying.
"Rae, Shannon's here, she knows about Jesse, can you hear me, Honey? She knows where he is."
Rae seemed to come back to them a little and she focused on Shannon. "What … why did this happen? We were just going home, and he was so scared, I would never hurt him, why did he do this? Steve, he bled so much, and it was an artery, I know it was … and it spurted … in my kitchen, it spurted everywhere … and … Alex, did we save him ... how will Jesse feel if he has killed his best friend?" The last few words had been so quiet that both Alex and Shannon had struggled to hear them, but they had felt so for her.
Shannon placed her hand on top of Rae's, she didn't see her very often but she knew that Rae wouldn't mind the contact. "Jesse is in room 3939, Mark had him admitted, and he is going to arrange for Doctor Yung to see him in the morning, Rae, he seemed a little distant, like he didn't remember why he was here." Shannon turned away knowing that her words had hurt, and wishing she hadn't had to say them.
Jesse had woken up with a start and for a moment he had no idea where he was, but then he saw the familiar nightstand, felt the regulation sheets underneath him and knew that he was in the hospital. He wasn't sure why, but he felt safe and secure and his eyelids began to droop. Jesse heard the door open, and the light from outside was bright, throwing a shadow across the figure that entered the room, his heart rate soared, he felt a scream in his throat and he had no idea what to do.
The OR had been tense as Steve was wheeled in and everyone knew that they needed to stitch him up because otherwise he would bleed to death. "Ok, people, this needs to be done quickly, I want updates continually on BP, oxygen levels, hell, I even want to know how fast his hair's growing, let's do this." Wil Collins was an experienced trauma surgeon and he knew that once he could get to the arm of this patient, he couldn't think of him as Steve, he would have no problems, but he just had to stay alive long enough.
The room was quiet but totally focussed, and as the beeps and shushes took on a reassuring steadiness Wil began his work. He had no idea how much time he had, but he guessed it might not be quite long enough.
Rae had gone up to see her husband after Alex had treated and released her, and much to her surprise Mark had been with Jesse, but he had admitted that he was keeping busy because he couldn't sit still, and so he was spending his time with his friend. Mark said that something had happened to upset Jesse, that as he had opened the door to enter the room Jesse had panicked, the machines had gone haywire, and they'd had no choice but to sedate him.
Rae had stayed with Jesse for just over a half hour, but in the end she had realised that her ordeal was beginning to catch up with her and she knew she needed to go home, if only for a little while.
Alex had driven Rae home just after four in the morning and insisted on going into the house with her. The yellow police tapes had been removed and she had called the station on Alex's cell to check it was ok for her to enter her home.
"Rae, do you want me to stay with you?" Alex could see that she was pale and looking a little anxious.
"No, no, I'll be fine. I'm going to go straight to bed, but I can come back in the morning can't I?"
"I signed you off work tomorrow, so you do just what you feel up to, ok?"
Rae nodded her head, and then stood on tip toe to kiss Alex on the cheek. "Thank you for bringing me home. I'll see you later." Rae watched Alex leave and then with a sigh she closed her front door and stood in the hallway.
The memories of the evening were trying to get to the front of her mind, but Rae used all of her police training and compartmentalised what had happened. She knew she had told Alex she would go to bed, but before she could even think of doing that she had to clean up her kitchen and hallway, but now it was just a job, just a household chore that needed to be completed. Rae ran up the stairs and into her bedroom, she pulled off the scrub top that Alex had given her to replace her shirt and shoved it into the laundry basket. She took a grey sweatshirt out of the closet and shrugged herself into it. Rae felt her head begin to throb, so she rummaged about in the drawer in her nightstand until she found some painkillers which she took downstairs again with her.
As she stood at the bottom of the beautiful mahogany staircase with its deep red carpet Rae could see the blood from footprints on the black and white tiled hallway floor and she knew that the kitchen would be worse. With a deep sigh Rae took her courage in both hands and moved over towards and then through the kitchen door. The sight that greeted her was still a shock, there was so much blood and it had landed on almost every surface. Detaching herself from her surroundings once more Rae took her headache tablets and then got a bucket and mop from the utility room, then she filled the bucket with hot water and the Mop n Glow and began to clean the floor. It soon became clear that however much she cleaned the stain would not come out of the grout between the tiles, and she would either have to retile the floor or have the grout replaced.
The fronts of the cupboards and the counters didn't take as long, and soon the kitchen was as clean as it was going to get. Rae checked the clock and realised that it was almost six in the morning. She knew that Alex was starting work again at seven and that if she arrived just after that she might be able to find out how Jesse and Steve were. Telling herself that she needed to be up and about again at half seven Rae lay down on the sofa in the breakfast room, pulled the throw off the back and over herself, then she closed her eyes and tried to think happy thoughts.
The waiting room outside the OR was cold and barren in the early morning light. Mark checked his watch, it was a little before seven, he had made sure that Jesse was sedated and calm, finished his phone calls, drunk two cups of coffee and now all he could do was wait. There was nothing else to do. With a sigh he got to his feet, somehow if he was moving he didn't feel so desperate. He went over to the small table underneath the window and began to neaten up the magazines, once he had done that he straightened the pictures on the walls, something, he had to do something. He turned suddenly, hearing a noise and there, in the doorway was Daniel, with Michael standing just behind him.
"Grandpa."
The one word almost broke his heart and he held his arms out as the, suddenly very young, boy ran to him.
"Shhh, it's ok, he'll be ok." Mark said a silent prayer that he wouldn't be made a liar and then looked up at the Englishman standing just a little way away from them. "Michael, thank you for bringing him, I just couldn't leave.
"That is quite alright, Sir, Master Daniel, I will return home now that you are in the care of your Grandfather."
"What? You mean you aren't staying? I'll bet if it was Mom you would be right here, we couldn't prise you away!"
"Daniel! I know you're worried, but that's enough." Mark looked the boy in the eye, and could see nothing but hurt there.
"But it's true, when Mom was in the hospital he came and stayed. But because it's Dad, he wants to go straight home."
"No, Sir, that isn't true, I have responsibilities, and I will also need to pick up Madam from the airport. I have a house to run, but I will be back, Daniel, the Lieutenant is my employer, just as Madam is, my duties for both of them are the same."
Daniel had the grace to look a little ashamed. "I'm sorry, M, I'm just scared, and … and you and Grandpa, you help me to be … well, less scared I guess. You'll come back later?"
"Of course, Master Daniel, and you have your Grandfather with you, I wouldn't leave you unattended … Doctor Sloan, I may not be here in person, but I will be thinking of the Lieutenant continually."
Mark smiled, he knew that what the butler said was quite an admission and he didn't want to embarrass the man. He watched as Michael left the room and then the two of them sat together. As they did so there was a slight noise at the door and Wil Collins, a sombre look on his face, and blood covering his clothes moved into the room.
The caretaker of the apartment building looked at the note in his hand. It was the third one he had received recently about the burning waste basket and he was getting a little fed up. Albert Hardy had checked over the regulations, and he couldn't find anything that said you couldn't set your waste bin alight on the fire escape. All it said was that it was to be kept clear of any obstructions, but the basket had been placed carefully, and wasn't obstructing anything. He guessed though, that if you were fleeing a burning building, flames halfway down the stairs could be a little disconcerting and so he knew he would have to go and see Matthew Little.
With a heavy heart Albert finished his breakfast, locked up his own apartment and made his way up to the third floor, the elevator clunked a few times, and he realised he would have to arrange to have that looked at too. He still hadn't gotten over the time when Mrs Bernstein and her poodle got stuck in the darn thing for three hours, and he had a feeling he would never get rid of the smell.
The rapping woke Matthew with a start and he looked around him. Nothing seemed to have changed since the last time he remembered being in this room, which was a relief. He moved over towards the door and peered through the peephole and seeing Albert standing the other side he opened it with a smile.
"Hey, Bert how's it going?"
"Not bad, Matt, not bad, I'm glad you're home. Is that friend of yours still here?" Albert knew that sometimes Matthew's mate Dominic slept over, and if that was the case he would have to talk on the doorstep.
"He is, but he's fast asleep. He got stood up yesterday, I think he drowned his sorrows, I don't think he even planned to go to work today!" Matthew was obviously scandalized by his friend's behaviour.
"Oh, well, I won't disturb him, but you had that trash can burning on your fire escape again, and there have been complaints."
Matthew hung his head. "That was me, I'm sorry, Bert, I spoiled one of his shirts, and … and I forgot to get rid of it, I didn't want him to find it, but he was coming over, and I needed to … I'm sorry."
Albert shook his head, he felt for Matthew, he was a nice kid, quiet, unassuming, continually on edge. Dominic, on the other hand, from what he'd heard, was confident, a little distant, liked clubs and loud music, what he had in common with Matt, Bert had no idea, but he was normally no trouble as a tenant, he wished he had a block full of Matthews. So he'd had a problem on the fire escape a couple of times, if it meant Matthew's life was a little easier he would overlook it.
"Listen, Kid, promise me that you won't do it again, I can go back to the resident's committee and tell 'em it's sorted. Ok?"
"Yeah, thanks. You want a cup of coffee?"
"Nah, I might wake his lordship!" Albert rolled his eyes and was pleased when Matt laughed.
"In which case I'll need the waste basket to keep over my head for a few days. I'll see you, Albert and, I promise, no more fires."
The door closed behind the janitor and Matthew leant against it, his heart hammering in his chest. Dominic was still asleep, he hadn't come out to see what was happening, and for that, at least, he had to be grateful.
Jo rubbed her eyes and gradually stood up. She stretched as tall as she could and linked her fingers together and extended her arms as far as they would go. Once she had done that she looked at the door in front of her and for a moment had no idea what to do. She tried the handle, but there was no movement. She rattled it harder, but that was all it did, rattle! Jo found it hard to believe, but there was no denying it, she had spent the night here because someone had locked her in the attic.
The house was still silent, and Jo moved through the gaps between the boxes until she could get to the window. Once there she leant her head on the cool glass and tried to get the images from her dreams out of her mind. She had been surprised by how little her ordeal with Don Werner had affected her, a fact she put down to the strong relationship she and Steve had, it had caused a few sleepless nights but she hadn't, until last night, had the nightmares she had been expecting. She guessed that it had a lot to do with the fact that she was being held prisoner once again, but the dreams had been vivid, she had felt her helplessness, heard the voice of her tormentor and the sounds of Jesse's screams. Waking up hadn't been a problem and she had been able to get away from the images for a while by standing up and walking around for a few minutes before trying to make herself comfortable once again. Now though, in the cold light of day, she just wanted to get out, to get away from this place that made her fears grow out of all proportion, get her business concluded as soon as possible and go home to Steve.
The ICU at Community General was quiet, apart from the regular beeps and shushes of machines, and the soft sobbing that sometimes broke the air. Mark eased himself slightly in his chair, never once letting his gaze leave the face of his son. He had again come so close to losing him, and again someone had been smiling down on them both, and he was fighting back once more.
Mark still felt unable to believe that all of the anguish of the last few hours had been caused by Jesse. Rae had, to his relief, gone home for a few hours sleep, although he was sure she would be back long before Jesse was awake. Suddenly Mark knew that he had to get up and stretch his legs, there was no way he could stay sitting for a moment longer. With a sigh he stood, speaking as he did so.
"Steve, I have to just stretch my legs, Son, but all I plan to do is walk the length of the hallway and then I'll be back." There was no response, but he hadn't expected there to be. Although the wounds Steve had suffered weren't serious any longer, their results had almost killed him, and he was heavily sedated while his body began its recovery.
Mark checked his watch, it was just after nine in the morning, he turned to leave the room and nearly jumped out of his skin as he saw Daniel standing there, the haunted look still on his face. Daniel had fallen asleep once they had got Steve into his room and hooked up to the monitors, and Mark had been grateful for that. This was traumatic for all of them, but the boy was only fifteen.
"Grandpa?"
Mark moved across at that one word, which could either send him flying with happiness or tear at his heart, and took the boy into his arms. "Shhh, it's ok, he really is going to be fine. He survived the surgery, and he will get better."
Daniel looked up into the face of the man he liked more and more each time he saw him. "You promise? He's not gonna die?"
"No, he's not gonna die, I promise. Now, I need to stretch my legs, get a coffee and …" Mark made a theatrically grand gesture of looking around himself to check no one was listening "… go to the little boys room! Wanna come?"
Daniel just nodded his head, somehow his grandfather's relaxed attitude made him feel less scared and he knew that there was no way that the older man would leave the room for even a second if his dad was still in danger. "I just want to tell him something first, is that ok?"
"Of course, I'm sorry; I didn't mean to hurry you away." Mark was instantly concerned. He'd wanted to stop the boy from worrying, not make him think he couldn't see his father. Moving back slightly Mark watched as Daniel walked hesitantly towards the bed.
"Dad, it's me, Daniel. Mom's not back yet, but I didn't want you to think we didn't care. I'm real sorry you got hurt, I … I love you, Dad." Daniel reached out and touched Steve on the cheek, almost as if he was afraid that to do so would cause him to disappear before his eyes. Then the young boy turned and left the room with Mark.
When they returned Mark was relieved to see Amanda sitting by the bedside. He could see tears on her cheeks and as he said her name she ran into his arms just as Daniel had done.
"Oh, Mark, I'm so sorry I couldn't get here earlier, I was so scared I would be … too late."
"No, he's not gonna die, Grandpa promised." Daniel's tone was almost belligerent, as if daring anyone to contradict him.
"Daniel," Amanda's tone softened, "I know he isn't, not now, but you know it was touch and go for a while." She saw the boy nod his head. "I have to go to work, but Ron is home, and if you would like to stay with CJ and Dion tonight, well you are welcome."
Daniel thought for a moment, "No thanks, Mom will be home, and … and well, M might need me."
Mark and Amanda smiled at each other, he had come such a long way, this boy who had first entered their lives when he robbed a grocery store. He had found a family who loved him and who he was able to love back, his school work, although not going to set the world alight, was always done conscientiously and with care, and he had the ability to think of others before himself. Both of them were more relieved than they would ever admit that Steve had survived once more, but this time they weren't just relieved for themselves, but for a boy who needed the strong and loving influence of his father in his life.