Chapter 25 – Testing Times
"Rae, I know you're scared and upset, but there's nothing I can do tonight. Take her home and come back on Monday morning. I'll set up an appointment with Doctor Knoll for as early in the day as I can, until then just look after her like you normally would, ok?" Alex had kept his hand on Rae's shoulder the entire time he spoke, ensuring that she didn't interrupt him, but as soon as she knew he was finished her words began to fly.
"Alex, I can't wait until then, she can't hear anything, how am I supposed to treat her just like I normally would when she can't hear anything?"
"Rae, stop it! Do you want me to admit her again? Take her away from you and put her back in a foreign environment, when we've established that her hearing has been damaged?" Alex's voice had risen as he spoke, and Rae knew that she had caused him to lose his temper with her.
"No, no, I'm sorry, Alex, it's just, what do I do? I can't sing to her, read her a story, watch a video with her, all the things that we do when we spend time together need her to be able to hear, and she can't do that any more!" Rae willed back the tears, knowing that if they started to fall she would never be able to stop them.
"I don't know what else to suggest, you could call Jesse, or Steve. You know that Mark or Jo or Amanda will come stay with you, and Monday we'll get her tested properly, ok? But you don't have to do this alone, you're surrounded by friends and family who love you, and we'll do all we can for you and Anneya." Alex had run some simple hearing tests on the little girl and he knew that she was no longer hearing him. He wasn't sure, however, how severe the loss was and he began writing a note to himself to contact Doctor Knoll as he finished speaking. He had moved away from his friend to give her the chance to get herself back under control. Finally, he looked back up again to see her sitting on the gurney, her daughter on her lap, rocking her back and forth as her own tears flowed.
ooo
Jesse stopped when he got out into the lobby of the movie theatre; he took a deep breath and tried to calm himself. He didn't know what to do next, but knew that what he had done so far was not only wrong but stupid. As he stood there Susan came out of the same door he had and walked up to him.
"Jesse, Honey, why did you walk out on me?" Susan laid her hand on his arm and watched him move away from her.
"I shouldn't have come." You shouldn't have come. That's what he'd said to Rae, but this time it was true.
"Why not? Jesse, your marriage is over, so's mine, we were always meant to be together, can't you see that?" Susan was not going to be deterred, and so she moved closer to him again.
"Susan, stop. You're wrong, we … we weren't meant to be together, if we were then you wouldn't have left, and I wouldn't have found Rae." Jesse reminisced for a moment as he remembered seeing Rae in Bob's all those years ago, before the pain and hurt had invaded their lives and, as always happened when he thought of his wife, the memories threatened him once again.
"I lost you once, Jess, I'm not gonna to let that happen again, from what I've heard your wife finds trouble irresistible, and doesn't care who else she pulls in with her. We had fun together, Jesse, why can't we do that again?" Susan lowered her voice and tried to pull him towards her.
Fun, it had been a long time since he'd had fun, fun was playing with his kids, rolling around the grass, laughing and joking, building sandcastles and then knocking them down. Fun was sitting with Rae in the evenings, talking about something or other that had happened during the day, or just sitting on the sofa with his wife curled up next to him.
"I … I have to go, I'm sorry, Susan." He put his hand into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. "Get a cab home, and I'll see you at work next week… Bye, and I'm sorry." He handed her a twenty dollar bill and turned away.
"Don't you walk out on me, Jesse Travis; if you do you'll be sorry! I came half way round the world to win you back, and that's what I intend to do." Susan's voice cut through Jesse like a knife and he felt his heart begin to beat harder and louder. He just knew he had to get away and so he broke into a run, pushing through the revolving doors and out into the night air.
ooo
The house had seemed very quiet and empty when Eliana left. Steve had felt guilty going in to the station to work all afternoon, and so when he had arrived home just after five he had already decided to spend the evening with his wife and son.
Daniel had been busy, but Jo was resting in the morning room, and had been delighted to see her husband, knowing that he wasn't going back to work until Monday morning. Steve and Jo had sat talking of the future, of the time when there would be another little person living with them, laughing and enjoying life to the full, and they had begun to make plans, the type of plans that every couple, if they're lucky, get to make.
Daniel had spent the day with Maddie, and they had found an empty bench in a park near the Never Say Die Gym and Daniel had told her his news.
"You're quiet, what's up?" He'd seen Maddie watching him the entire time they'd been working out and Daniel had known he wouldn't get away without telling her all about it.
"Nothing." He tried to appear unconcerned, but he could hear the despondency in his voice.
"Yeah, right, and I'm about to go head to head with Mike Tyson. What's up?"
Daniel had taken a deep breath. "My mom's gonna have a baby."
"Wow, Jo is, really? That's wonderful … that's not wonderful. Why don't you think that's wonderful? I thought you loved having Eliana and Anneya to stay."
"Well, yeah, I do, but … but they go home, they don't stay and have the same Mom and Dad that I do." Daniel stopped talking; he wasn't sure what else to say.
"So, if you were their natural son they wouldn't be allowed to have any more kids? Daniel, they chose you, they went to court to fight for you and you went to court to fight for them. How can you be jealous of a tiny baby coming into the house?"
"I'm not jealous, it's not that, it's just … it's just …" Daniel stopped talking, he wasn't really sure how to explain his feelings, but he was sure he wasn't jealous.
"It's just that you have gotten so used to being the only child, and having Jo, Steve and Michael running after you, and all of a sudden there's gonna be someone else too." Maddie had taken Daniel's hand in her own, and he decided that he liked that feeling.
"I still don't think I'm jealous, it's just that … what if they don't love me as much any more, what if everything changes? I like it the way it is right now."
"If things change then you'll change with them. Do you think that this little baby isn't gonna love his or her big brother just like you are gonna love them?"
Daniel looked at her with his eyes wide. He hadn't thought of that, it had gone through his mind that he would have to share his mom and dad, but he would become a brother, a big brother, which would be really neat.
Daniel came down the stairs ready for dinner and heard Steve and Jo laughing and talking in the morning room. He opened the door and went in, an uncertain smile on his face.
"Hi."
"Hi, Son, come and sit down." Steve smiled up at the young boy and indicated that he should sit on the sofa next to him.
Daniel did as he was told and then he squirmed around in the seat until he was facing his parents. "I know I said sorry already, but I really am glad about this baby, I talked about it with Maddie, and well, I'm gonna be a big brother!" Daniel beamed and Jo moved so she could take him into her arms.
"Oh, Honey, I'm so glad that you feel that way. We've been talkin' about what is gonna happen, how this little one will change things, an' we don't want you to think that any of the feelin's that we have for you right now are gonna alter. You are our eldest child; nothin' can ever change that, nothin', ok?"
"Yes, Ma'am, but I'm still sorry. I was a jerk; I should have thought a bit more before rushing off like that." Daniel found that he needed to keep on apologising, but then he felt his dad's hand on his arm.
"Daniel, your mom and I have been trying for a baby for a while, but we always wanted it to have an older brother to love and be there for him or her. That was you, it still is you. This little person will be real lucky to have you, real lucky." Steve had put his hand on Jo's still flat stomach as he spoke, and Daniel couldn't take his eyes off it.
"Can you feel it yet? You should be able to feel it move shouldn't you?" Daniel wanted to reach out and touch as well, but he couldn't bring himself to do so.
"No, I don't think so. I don't know when you should be able to feel it, but I bought myself a manual!" Jo leant over and picked up a baby care book from the coffee table. "This takes you through all nine months of the process, an' then the first couple of months of the baby's life. There's another one over there," Jo pointed to the other side of the coffee table, "that's for dads, you can read it if you would like."
"It's not ucky is it? Because I've done sex education at school and some of it is real ucky!" Daniel pulled a face and both Jo and Steve laughed.
"No, Son, it's not, I've only flicked through, but it seems pretty user friendly!"
"Excuse me, Madam, Sir, Master Daniel, but dinner is served." Michael had come silently into the room and they all decided that perhaps actually looking in the books would be better left until another time.
ooo
Rae had taken Anneya out of the trauma suite and then headed up to the cafeteria to get Eliana. The little girl was sitting, half a cookie and an almost empty glass of milk in front of her, drawing pictures for Mark and Shannon on a large white piece of paper. She looked up when she heard her mom's voice and smiled.
"Hi, Mommy, hi, Neya." Then she returned to her drawing.
"Hey, Sweetie, Shannon, Mark, thank you so much for looking after her for me. I can take her home now." Rae stood behind her elder daughter, but she didn't make any move to actually get her to stop drawing.
"Rae, is there anything we can do?" Mark looked anxiously at his friend and his goddaughter, who was held in Rae's arms. He had an idea that he knew what was wrong with the little girl, he had seen the slightly vacant look in patients' eyes many times before, but unless Rae asked him, he would stay quiet.
"No, Mark, thank you, but no, not yet at any rate. Ana, we have to go home, Honey."
For a moment Eliana thought about ignoring her mother, but then she smiled and carefully got down from the chair. Anneya reached out as she saw the cookie on the table and Rae picked it up and gave it to her. "Aah." She smiled and then took a small bite.
"Guys I'm gonna have to run, but I will see you both soon, ok?" Rae turned and made her way towards the exit. Everything that the little girl did or said made her want to cry. She knew that so many things were going to change, she wasn't sure how much of it she would be able to cope by herself and however much Alex told her that she had friends and family to help her, in the end it would be her and her daughters, and she would be alone.
ooo
Sunday morning found Rae still sitting in one of the armchairs in the breakfast room that she had made herself comfortable in the night before. She had put both children to bed not long after she had got home from the hospital, and although Eliana had chattered away to her toys for a while Anneya had closed her eyes and gone straight to sleep. Rae knew that she was still recuperating from her accident, and that she could have probably slept standing up, but she also knew that once the little girl closed her eyes her world was totally dark and silent and that sleep would probably come quite quickly.
She had wanted desperately to call Jesse, to get him to come over, but she wasn't sure if it was because she needed him or if she wanted him to look at Anneya and tell her that everything would be all right. Either way she didn't think she could face him, not with all the different emotions going through her. The look of pity that he had given her in the hospital when she had finally realised, and accepted, that he no longer loved her was still fresh in her mind and she was absolutely certain that she couldn't cope with living through that again.
Rae knew that she must have slept a little during Saturday night, but as the sun came up on the Sunday morning it didn't feel as if it had been anywhere near enough. She made her way into the kitchen, plugged in the baby alarm where she could easily hear any sounds and then made herself a cup of tea and put two pieces of bread in the toaster. Rae had received quite a few e-mails from Steve while she had been in the hospital, all of them keeping her abreast of the situation in both the case involving the Chief's wife, and their Red Rose killer. The Night Owl burglaries that they went back to whenever they struck again had also got a few mentions, and Rae was glad that Jo had updated their security systems while she had been in the hospital but she was also relieved that the guard dogs had gone. Rae didn't know when she would get a chance to go through it all, but she downloaded everything ready for when she had a spare moment.
It was just after eight when Rae heard Eliana beginning to chat to her dolly. She was obviously talking to her toy as if she was in class, and Rae realised how much the child must have missed being in pre-school the previous two weeks. She would be returning to the loving care of Miss Amy on Monday and Rae knew that her daughter would be unable to contain her excitement when she got there.
With a heavy heart Rae climbed the stairs and headed towards the nursery. Her emotions were in a turmoil, she was delighted to be back with both her girls, and was looking forward to the wonderful experience of her daughters spotting her for the first time that day, but also she was desperately worried about Anneya, and knew that if she was still asleep then no amount of shouting or screaming would wake her up.
Rae had just realised that she would have to explain to Eliana why Anneya no longer answered when she spoke to her when she got to the bedroom door, stopped and watched silently for a minute.
Eliana had her back to her mother and was oblivious to her presence. She had her dolly sitting on the bed and, as Rae had surmised, she was 'teaching' her. Anneya was awake, and standing at the bars of her crib looking at her sister. The expression on her face was one of bemusement, and once again Rae's heart broke for her.
Finally, just after ten o'clock, Rae could stand it no longer and she picked up the phone and put a call through to the beach house. Mark answered and Rae asked for Jesse.
"Honey, I'm sorry, he's working today. Now he's back on the official rota again he has to do Sunday's. Is there anything I can do…? Oh, yeah, I think he's working then too, but if you're coming in I'll make sure he gets to see you… No, he'll finish at one tomorrow … of course I don't mind, he can bring my goddaughter here any time he likes… Ok, bye." Mark put the phone down and stood deep in thought for a moment. He knew that there was something seriously wrong with Anneya, something that Alex couldn't share, and Jesse didn't know.
The younger man was fast asleep in his apartment downstairs, having gotten in from his date with Shannon a little after one. Mark had still been up; he had found a Laurel and Hardy marathon on an obscure TV channel and been unable to drag himself away. Thankfully he wasn't scheduled to work at all on the Sunday and was going to dinner at Steve's, so a day of slothful living was all he had planned. He grabbed himself a fresh mug of coffee and went out onto the deck, it would be good to have Anneya come for a visit the next day, and hopefully she would still be enjoying herself when he got home from work at around five.
Mark sat down on one of the loungers and put his drink on a small occasional table. He thought about Anneya and the problems he knew she would have if his personal diagnosis was correct. Head trauma could produce awful injuries and although he knew that Rae wouldn't agree with him, if his goddaughter only suffered hearing loss she would be considered one of the luckier ones. With a shake of his head be began to concentrate on more pleasant memories and he let his mind run back over the moment he had learnt that he was going to become a grandpa again. Daniel was his grandchild, just as surely as if Steve was the boy's natural father, but a baby, that would be wonderful. Mark closed his eyes and a vision of his wife came up in his mind, Katherine, he missed her so much, and she would have made such a great grandma. It hadn't been meant to be, but, just as he always did, he would tell her of all the major things that happened with the new member of the Sloan clan and how much he was enjoying it.
ooo
Rae didn't want to live through another Sunday alone ever again. She had taken the girls downstairs for breakfast and it was clear to her, whatever Alex might say, that Anneya couldn't hear anything that was going on around her. Although she hadn't meant to, Rae knew that she was testing her daughter's hearing every chance she got, speaking her name behind her, or to the side of her; making noises and then watching for a reaction and feeling more and more despondent when there was none.
She had been relieved when her daughter slept, but then she felt guilty because she didn't want her to be awake, and Rae kept reminding herself how, just a week earlier, she would have given anything to have her child returned to her. As the day went on she became short tempered, shouting at Eliana and then feeling guilty about that too.
By the time that she had given the girls their evening meal, they'd had their baths and their hair washed Rae was so tired she could hardly stand up. With a heart so heavy that she wasn't sure she would ever smile again Rae had gathered Eliana and Anneya up in her arms and hugged them before making herself comfortable on the elder child's bed to read a story.
Rae had chosen a book that she knew Anneya loved, it told the story of a small red tractor who made his way around the farm looking for his mommy. Everything he came across had a portion of its surface contained in a square and the idea was to feel it and decide whether the big tractor had been found or not. All the different things that you would find in a farmyard had a page of their own and they could usually make the book last for ages. Although Anneya had looked at her mother as if trying to understand why she couldn't hear the story she had still rubbed her fingers over each furry, smooth or rough square and laughed as she did so.
Once the story had been completed and prayers said Rae kissed each little girl goodnight, made sure that they both had their night-time companions and then she had made her way back downstairs.
Although it was only eight o'clock in the evening Rae felt as if she could sleep for a week, and once she had locked up the house and set the alarm she got her laptop and went up to the bedroom that she used to share with Jesse. Each time she entered the room to go to sleep she would think of the time they had spent there together. It had been happy, they had both loved the house and they would lie together and talk, or make love to each other gently, but with a passion that Rae had thought would never die. Now she feared that she would spend the rest of her life alone.
Once Rae had gone through her own nightly routine she made herself comfortable in the bed and began to read the e-mails and attachments from Steve. She knew that once again she would be away from the station in the morning, and although she felt guilty about it her family had to come first. After about an hour Rae felt her eyelids begin to droop and she switched off her machine and carefully slid it under the bed, then she made herself comfortable and turned off the light.
Two hours later she was in the kitchen making herself a drink of chamomile and lime tea to try and switch her mind off when she heard Anneya begin to cry. Leaving the drink she rushed up to the nursery hoping to get there before Eliana woke up too.
Anneya was standing up in her crib, the tears streaming down her face, one hand was holding the bars and the other her giraffe. With a deep sigh Rae picked her up, and took her back into her own bedroom.
ooo
The phone rang in the Sloan household just as Jo and Steve were making their way down to breakfast. Michael walked sedately across the hallway and picked up the receiver.
"The Sloan residence, how may I help you …? Good morning, Madam, if you would like to hold the line I will see if she is available yet." Michael carefully placed the handset on the telephone table and turned to his employer. "Madam," his voice was slightly hushed as he spoke, "Miss Gardiner is on the telephone from Texas."
Jo rolled her eyes to the heavens and fought down the urge to pretend she was still in bed. "Well, I guess if I don't speak to her now she will be callin' all day." Jo put her hand out and Michael placed the receiver in her palm. "Deb's, how nice to hear from you." Both Steve and Michael knew that she didn't mean a word of it. "Well, thank you, I know that Steve will be glad to hear that… No, no, this week he's standin' in for his captain, an' so he will be on desk duty most of the time… I guess so, but I don't think that is likely for a good while … No, Anneya is home from the hospital now, so things are improvin'… Deb's, you don't have to do that … No, really, you don't have to … Next Friday? I think that we have plans, maybe the Sunday would be better … yeah, ok then, give my love to David … bye now." Jo put the phone down, stuck her tongue out at it and then turned to see the expectant faces of her husband and butler.
"Well, y'all are gonna be just delighted to know that Miss Prissy Knickers is comin' for a little visit … she is concerned about me spendin' too much time alone in my condition an' she thought that I might like to spend some time with her, as she understands how I am feelin'! Urghhh!" Jo shuddered, "I managed to put her off until next Sunday, but then she is comin' for a week, a whole, entire week!"
"Honey, I think that's a wonderful idea, she's just being sociable, and you are always so hard on her. It'll be nice for you two to become friendlier before the babies are born."
"Yeah, right! Michael, I take it breakfast is ready."
"Yes, Madam, if you would like to come this way." Michael indicated with his hand that they should go into the morning room and hoped that he had hidden his own reaction to the forthcoming visit from Debbie Gardiner. He knew that seven days with her in the house would try even his patience.
ooo
The call from room service came just after eight and Matthew thanked the young woman politely and then climbed out of bed. The room was very nice, functional, clean, almost obsessively so, but he was enjoying staying in it. Today was the first day of competition for Dominic and Matthew knew that he wouldn't see him at all until maybe bedtime. He had begun to be aware far more of what his friend was doing and it scared him. He knew that they were the same person, that they shared the same body, but he had never felt quite so much a part of him. Before when terrible things had happened they had been apparent to him just as vague memories, but now he was there when they happened, he felt the thrill of the chase, of the kill, and that both excited and sickened him. The cat, that had been the worst moment of his life, the poor little thing hadn't stood a chance, and he had tried, really tried to assert himself and get Dominic to stop, but he hadn't been able to. But afterwards, after Nadine was dead, he'd been able to break through and he went back to the apartment and he cleaned everything in the kitchen and the living room. He had left the bedroom, because he wasn't allowed in other people's bedrooms, and the bathroom, well there was no force on earth that would have made him go back in there.
Matthew felt Dominic becoming more dominant and he surrendered himself to the inevitable, and with a shudder he was gone, wondering fleetingly as he disappeared whether he would ever come back.
ooo
The classroom at Millbrook Elementary School in Malibu was abuzz with excitement and Mrs Milner knew that she was going to have her work cut out for her keeping the twenty-three children down to a dull roar for most of the day.
They had been doing a project on the major habitats of Southern California, and were getting ready for their field trip to Topanga State Park, which all the children now knew was the largest city park in the United States.
"Ms Milner, Ms Milner, the bus is here, the bus is here!" the excited voice belonged to Jayden Brent, who had been assigned the task of watching out of the window, if only to keep him from getting a detention for over-excitement.
"Ok, everybody, gather up your lunches, make sure that you have your hiking shoes on, I don't want anyone in their sneakers." Mrs Milner paused and looked around; everyone was nodding their heads or holding up a foot so that she could see what they were wearing. The school was in a prosperous area on the outskirts of Malibu and so the request for adequate footwear hadn't been made to families unable to provide their children with what was needed.
"Ms Milner, can we go, please?" The excited voices all began to speak at once after Jayden broke the silence, and the teacher looked around at the beautiful work already on the walls, which had resulted in them getting their field trip in the first place, and then at the faces in front of her, for a moment she put her finger to her lips, held her other hand up in the air and gradually the room descended into silence.
After holding the quiet for a minute Ella Milner smiled, "You may get into your line." The class immediately moved over towards the door and, in the way that they did every morning for recess, stood in alphabetical order waiting for the next instruction. "Now, quietly, because the rest of the school is still working … shhh." She put her finger to her lips again as a few muffled cheers and cries of 'unlucky' rang out, "Quietly, because the rest of the school is still working, you may walk, in an orderly fashion, out of the building …" she paused for effect, "and get on the bus."
ooo
Rae had taken Eliana to pre-school and, as she had predicted, the little girl had been almost beside herself. She had dragged Rae and Anneya into Miss Amy's classroom so that she could show her teacher that her sister was home, and once again the teacher had been kind and considerate in her dealings with the over excited little girl.
"See, Miss Amy, see, Neya home, Neya home, so I come back." Eliana had grinned and Rae, despite her anxiousness over what would be happening that day, had to smile.
"She has missed you dreadfully, Miss Amy, and as you can see you have a very willing pupil here. Any longer away from you and I think she would have left home to find you."
"She is a lovely little girl, and doing so very well here. We missed her over the last two weeks."
Eliana had been following the conversation and now she grasped Miss Amy firmly around the thighs and hugged her tightly. "I wuff you, Miss Amy."
"I think I'd better go, it will be Sally picking up today. Honey, I'll see you later, ok?" Rae crouched down, still holding Anneya tightly by the hand. The little girl hadn't made a sound or a movement since she had entered the classroom.
"K, Mommy, I wuff you too… Bye." The last word was thrown over the little girl's shoulder as she spotted a friend the other side of the room and rushed off towards her. Rae smiled as she watched her confident and happy child, and then she picked up Anneya and promised her silently that she would do everything in her power to ensure that she had a chance to be that way too.
ooo
Mrs Milner's class had spent a very enjoyable morning on the slightly higher trails of Topanga State Park, looking for signs of wildlife and cataloguing the different types of flora and fauna that they found. Although she had tried to get different groups of children together, after about half an hour they had gravitated towards their best friends, and all the groups had changed. She wasn't about to make an issue of it though, they were working extremely well and, as they made their way towards the area where she would count heads and they would work until lunch time, Mrs Milner took the digital camera out once more and began to take a few pictures.
ooo
The Macmillan Conference Centre, in San Francisco, was a large and impressive building and, as Dominic registered at the front desk, he felt a few stirrings of nervousness inside of him. The organisation of the competition was obviously very good, because his name had replaced that of the other employee who had cried off at the last minute, and so, pinning his name badge to his shirt as he walked along, Dominic made his way into the main hall.
The atmosphere was already buzzing, and the nervousness and anticipation rose in him a little more. The entire room was filled with individual work stations, and he checked his number once again and then made his way towards number 107.
The area assigned to him was exactly the same as all the others. He had a small sink with a shower attachment on the taps, a large mirror and a stand containing a hair dryer, a set of curling tongs, straighteners, a hot brush and a variety of different combs. There was also a pile of white fluffy towels and various shampoos and conditioners. On the end of one side of the counter there were two hooks and on the hooks was a wire basket. Dominic opened his backpack and took out his own personal pieces of equipment, which included hair dyes, different coloured hairpieces, clips and barrettes as well as hair sprays, both ordinary and glittered and an advertising card for his home salon.
He had just finished setting all of his things out to their best advantage in the basket when one of the official judges came up to go through them. Dominic could see that her name was Glenda Sloat. She was about fifty to fifty-five, if he was any good at guessing a woman's age, and he thought he probably was. She had on a brown dogtooth check suit with a peach coloured shirt underneath. Her hair, which Dominic though must have been styled by a monumental mason, was steel grey and looked absolutely solid on her head in heavily set waves and curls. Ms Sloat picked up the pair of half moon shaped glasses that hung round her neck on a chain and then peered into the basket.
"Good morning, young man, let us see what you have decided to bring with you." The voice was in total contrast to the person, it was lively, energetic, and despite himself Dominic smiled.
He knew that he had exactly the amount of things he was allowed, he also knew that none of them contravened any of the rules of the competition, and five minutes after arriving Ms Sloat was moving on to contestant 108, who Dominic noticed a few moments later hadn't been so careful as two large cans of spray and a box of Velcro hair curlers were taken away.
Dominic had smiled over at the slightly contrite looking guy next to him, "Tough break, man."
"Yeah, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But, hey, they'll remember me!"
Dominic nodded his head, there was one thing he had no intention of being, and that was remembered, not for hairdressing at any rate.
ooo
The appointment with Doctor Knoll had been arranged for eleven o'clock, and so Rae had taken Anneya out into the garden by the children's ward for her to play with some of the push-along toys and to wear her out a little. Alex had explained to her that the test she was going to have could be done while she was asleep and so, not wanting her daughter to be distressed any more than was necessary, Rae was trying to tire her out, it wasn't a difficult task at the moment, but she still did it, almost pretending that her little girl was as she had always been. She had called the beach house but there had been no reply and Rae had left a message on the answering machine before she remembered that Jesse was working. She left a message at the nurses' station in the ER because Jesse was treating a patient, and then she tried to put her husband out of her mind and concentrate on her little girl.
There was a furry horse toy which you sat on and pushed with your legs, and Anneya went over to it and hugged it around the neck. Then she carefully got onto it, staggering slightly until Rae gently placed her hands on her waist and picked her up.
"Aaa." Rae had felt her daughter jump as she touched her, but once she realised who it was she had smiled at her mother and spoken to her. Rae knew enough about deaf children to realise that she would lose the power of speech, there would be nothing in her life to encourage her to vocalise and so the ability would be lost. There and then she decided that she would get Anneya to talk while she had a tape recorder on so that she would always have a tangible record of her daughter's voice.
"Rae, Doctor Knoll is ready for you now." It was Shannon who had come to find them, and as they rode together in the lift she explained that Alex had arranged for her to stay with Rae so that there was a friendly face with her and Anneya during the test.
Doctor Knoll was very tall, probably about six foot four or five high, and Rae felt extremely intimidated. It wasn't a feeling she was used to, and she knew that she was experiencing it on behalf of her child and she pushed it to the far reaches of her mind before shaking the doctor by the hand and introducing herself.
"Hi, I'm Reagan Travis, and this is my daughter, Anneya. Do you have all her details, or would you like me to tell you about her?"
Doctor Knoll had smiled as Rae spoke and now he shook his head. "No, thank you, that won't be necessary, I have had some excellent notes from Doctor Martin, and all I need to do is wire your daughter up for her test and then the machine will do the work for us. Nurse, I understand that you know Anneya, would you like to help to get her ready?"
"Yes, Doctor." Shannon smiled at her little patient, and Anneya smiled back. Rae had begun to get used to the slightly bewildered look on her daughter's face, but she hoped that it would gradually disappear as she got used to her world of silence.
Gradually, Shannon placed the little headband around Anneya's head, carefully smoothing down her hair before she did so. Then she put small ear pieces into each ear, gently soothing her but holding her still, and even though there were a few tears Rae could see that Shannon was totally in control of the situation and she felt no need to intervene. Once everything was connected up to the main piece of machinery Shannon kissed the little girl on the forehead, straightened up and smiled over at Rae. Although she was being tested for deafness Shannon had spoken softly to the child the entire time she was working with her, and Rae had seen the way Anneya relaxed, the way she watched Shannon's face and more especially her lips as if knowing that she was missing something, but for the first time Rae had a feeling that it didn't matter to her daughter, Shannon's presence had been enough.
"Ok, I think we're ready to begin." Doctor Knoll had kept out of Anneya's way while she had been prepared, and he still did so. The bed that she was laying on made her look so small that Rae wanted to join her and hold her tight, but she resisted the temptation and took a seat in the chair next to her daughter's head and held her hand.
As Anneya's eyes slowly closed and her breathing became deep and even, Rae looked round for Shannon and thanked her for her assistance. After that she sat staring at her daughter and drinking in every part of her as she slept promising her again that she would do everything in her power to give her the life she deserved.