I Will Kill You Jak!!
Inu65: wow! Glad you guys liked it!! Thanks for your reviews, I still love you guys. MONSTER ENERGY DRINKS TO ALL!!! Yummy!! They have caffeine!! YUMMY CAFFINE!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Jak: and we're going to be stuck in a bar with her……? 0_0
Inu65: hey, does anyone know what taurine is? It's in Monster Energy drinks and I have no idea what the hell it is. Please tell me.
Jak: *grabs drink for Inu65* unleash the beast? Tear into a can of the meanest energy supplement on the planet? Oh god.
Daxter: ummm, Jak. I don't think she should be drinking that stuff…….
Jak: why?
Daxter: ummm, look. *points to Inu65 who's bouncing up and down in a circle singing the theme to Zorro*
Jak: 0_o ok. No more for you.
Inu65: *left eye twitching uncontrollably* no…..more…….caffinated…….drink……of death?! MIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!!! *tackles Jak and takes drink and runs away* my precious……my precious……*runs up tree and hisses at Jak* MIIIIINE!!! *hiss, hiss**falls out of tree**
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I Will Kill You Jak Chapter 3, Alcohol, Sugar, and Fake Kids
The four walked to a bar that looked pretty decent and went inside. There wasn't anybody in there, besides a few Crimson Guards that had passes out from to much alcohol. Other than that, there was one or two drunken fools playing a drinking game at the far end of the room at a table.
Jak walked over to the bar and sat down. Daxter hopped onto the stool next to Jak. Rayme nudged Keito and the two girls joined them. Keito sat next to Jak and Rayme sat next to Keito.
"What'd it be?" the bar tender asked in a gruff voice. "Got any Coke?" Keito asked. The bar tender raised an eyebrow. "What's it a joke or something?" he said with a slight laugh. "No. I wanna know if you have any-OWE!!! Rayme that hurt!!" Keito said starting to slap Rayme, who slapped back. The bar tender shook his head and looked over to Jak. One of the passed out Krimson Guards snored loudly then repositioned himself and began snoring.
The bar tender raised an eyebrow at Jak. "You don't look so good. You want somethin to wake ya up a bit? Get ya ta make ya feel beta?" the bartender said. "Yeah." Jak said with a slight nod. "And what about them?" the bartender asked pointing to the two teens who had finally stopped fighting and looked pathetic with their heads cocked to the side and drowse looks plastered to their faces. "Uh, same thing." Jak said. "You're the boss." the bartender said and walked over to the other side of the bar.
"Hey, Jak, relax, pal! You're too tense! Loosen up a bit!" Daxter said hopping onto Jak's head and looking into his eyes. Jak glared at Daxter. "Get off my head." he said. "Easy! Jees……" Daxter exclaimed bouncing back to the stool.
The bartender came back with a bottle of bright neon blue liquid inside and three glasses. Jak looked at the bottle containing the bright blue stuff. "What is it?" he asked, picking up the bottle and smelling the contents. It had a sweet fruity smell, and the bland smell off alcohol, it wasn't strong though. "It's my own concoction. Gets ride of migraines, hangovers, minor aches and pains, fatigue and other stuff." he said pouring the liquid into the glasses. Jak took a glass and brought it to his lips. "I warn ya though, don't down it. Drink it slowly." the bartender said. "Why?" Jak said lowering the glass. "Ya get too hyper, right away too. Afterwards the next day, you regret you even had it." he said.
Keito looked at the stuff in the glass and poked the glass. "Hey Rayme, look at this stuff! It looks cool!" Keito said, not all that tired anymore. "Ugh, I need sleep…" Rayme said putting her head down on the bar table. Keito looked at Jak to see if it was ok, and he nodded. She took the glass and took a sip. "Tastes like rum. Keito likes rum. Keito likes rum a lot!" Keito said downing the glass and slamming it on the table. "HEY RAYME!! YOU GOTTA TRY IT!! IT'S GOOD!!" Keito said bouncing in her seat. Rayme raised her head and stared at the shot glass full with the bright neon blue liquid. "What is it?" she asked. "A FRUITY THINGY THAT TASTES LIKE RUM!!!" Keito said still bouncing. Rayme smelled it and turned up her nose. "I don't like alcohol." she said and put her head back down on the table.
"Oh, no." Jak sighed heavily. "GET IT BEFORE SHE TAKES IT!" Daxter exclaimed. Jak reached for the glass, but Keito grabbed it just before he did. "MINE!! IT'S RUM!! Only, IT'S BLUE RUM!!! MIIIIIIIINE!!" she yelled and downed it. She coughed a little and began running around the bar singing the coconut song. "Jaaaaaak……make her stoooooop….." Daxter said. Jak got up and began to walk towards the crazed Keito.
"Keito, listen to me. Stop. Hey, listen, calm down, ok? Take a deep breath and-" Jak said walking slowly to the mega hyper teen.
"WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Keito called out running past Jak and ran over to Rayme. "RAYME!! YOU HAVE TO TRY IT!!" she said. "Uh, uh. I'm tired." Rayme said. Keito's eye began to twitch and grabbed Rayme's head and the glass. "YOU WILL DRINK IT AND YOU WILL LIKE IT!!" Keito said pouring the liquid down Rayme's throat. "VOILA!!! YOU LIKE?!" Keito exclaimed raising her arms over her head.
A few seconds later, Rayme bounced up and joined Keito in running around the bar singing Chiquita Banana song. Jak began to get very frustrated now. Every time he cornered one, they some how managed to get away from him.
The bartender watched in amusement and Daxter began to chase them. Rayme and Keito crossed paths and Keito ran head first into a poll and passed out. Rayme began to scream like Vash the Stampede and ran around Jak in a giant circle. Jak lunged to grab her but Rayme jumped out of his grasp and stepped on his back and got over him and ran into a wall.
Jak sighed heavily and sat back down on his stool and panted hard for a moment or two. "That was interesting. You ok?" the bartender chuckled. "yeah. I'm fine." Jak replied and poured himself another glass of the neon blue stuff. "Aren't you going to move them, Jak?" Daxter asked looking at Keito how was sprawled out in the middle of the floor and Rayme who had bounced back and was practically in the door way. "No." Jak said taking a sip. "Some father you are….." the bartender said drying out a glass with a rag. Jak spit his drink out and began to choke. Daxter began to pat Jak on the back. "Hey, buddy, breath." Daxter told Jak.
"What? You're not the father?" the bartender asked. Jak cleared his throat, still coughing some. "Listen buddy. I like you. I like you a lot, but if I don't get any proof that you didn't kidnap these kids, then I'm afraid that I'm going to have to turn you in." the bartender said leaning over the bar. "No, no, no, no. I-I am their father. Sorry, it went down the wrong way." Jak lied. Fortunately the bartender bought it. "Terribly sorry, man." he apologized. "It's ok. I get that a lot." Jak said taking another sip. "It's about time they shut up!" Daxter said. "It's been like what? How long Jak since we……..headed out?" Daxter said again. "Too long." Jak said putting the glass down.
"Owies….my head hurts." Keito said getting up and walking back to the bar. "Hey Jak, what happened to Rayme?" Keito asked. The bartender gave Jak the 'you lied' glare. Jak held up a hand. "They refuse to call me dad or father." Jak said simply, the nervous feeling burning in his chest and in his stomach. "What do you mean, 'dad'? you're not my-" Keito began but her mouth was covered by Daxter's furry paw. "Shhhh. Just play along." Daxter hissed in her ear. "Ooooh. Gotcha. He's my daaaad!!" Keito said hugging Jak around the shoulders.
"Who's your dad?" Rayme asked getting up. Daxter walked over to Rayme and told her the same thing he did to Keito. "He is, stupid head!" Keito said pointing to Jak. "Yeah, well. He's not only your dad! HE'S MINE TOO, STUPIDER HEAD!!" Rayme said.
"Hold on, pal. They don't look like you. So hows can they be your kids if they don't look like you?" the bartender said. Jak sighed heavily. "Can I talk to you?" Jak asked getting up and walking to the far corner of the bar. The bartender followed. "Listen, don't tell them. They were adopted. They think that I am their real dad and they'd be really upset if they find out. So please do me a favor, and not tell them, ok?" Jak explained. "I understand perfectly. Sorry about that. One other thing, why are they so short and their ears are short and stubby?" "They're deformed. That's why they were put up for adoption." Jak said making up the quickest way out he could. The bartender nodded and walked back to the bar. Jak sighed heavily and walked back too.
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Inu65: sorry for the cliffy. I don't want ya guys to loose interest so I'm on a no longer than 7 page chapter. 7 pages on my computer though. How'd you like? I practically died writing this!
Jak: I hate you with a burning passion of million hells.
Inu65: *pats Jak on arm* I'm glad. ^_^
Jak: *rolls eyes*
CTC: I……am tired…..*passes out cold*
Daxter: that was interesting.
Inu65: well, I've decided that I'm going to put the chapter title the chapter before. Well, only the chapters that I have an idea for though. This on I do.
NEXT TIME: Daxter here. What do ya get with drunks, Jak and me and two crazed teens? A WHOLE LOT OF CHAOS!! MAYHEM!!! WHAT'S NEXT?!?! PEOPLE SHOOTEN AND MORE SINGING!! GAAAAAAAH!!! THE SONGS!! Never could have been worse. It's a fool's paradise. Next time on I Will Kill You Jak, Alcohol, Sugar, Drunks and Guns