Josh's Wonderful Life
By Isadora Quagmire
Disclaimer: "Wow. Like, none of it is, like, so totally mine!"
Yeah, sad but true. I don't even own the idea (if you couldn't tell, I ripped it off of the movie…. but my style… p)!
Spoilers: Up to and through Noel. That's it.
A/N: The song 'Wonderful' in Wicked is NOT the best song in the show, but it is the catchiest. A WORD OF CAUTION: Heavy cursing in this chapter.
Chapter 3
"Joanie," Josh whispered.
"Yeah?"
"This is Leo's old house. What are we doing here?"
"Your world is not that small, Josh. You affect more lives than you think."
"Really?"
"Shut up and follow me," she said, grabbing his arm.
"Where are we going?"
"To the window."
"Why?"
"Because you ask too many questions."
Josh glared at his sister as he followed. "What's happening?"
"Again with the questions! Look, over there," she said, pointing to an armchair.
Josh followed her finger. He gasped. Sitting in an armchair with a beer in his hand was Leo McGarry. His face was older and more tired, and he sported a beer belly. Josh was even more surprised when Mallory walked in.
Her red hair was colored black, and her clothing could be most accurately described as a lack thereof.
"Where are you going," Leo muttered in his drunken stupor.
"Out."
"Get back here," he cried, reaching for her arm.
"No, you old bastard. You see, this is why mom left you. You're so drunk, you can't think straight."
"Get back here, bitch!"
"Why don't you make me!"
Leo grunted as he pulled himself up and out of the chair. Staggering towards Mallory, he exclaimed, "You're a stupid powerless bitch just like your mother! You have no place in the world! The only place you belong is in the kitchen!"
"What?"
"You're a good for nothing whore, woman! Now, make me some dinner," he yelled, slapping her across the face.
Mallory gingerly held her hand up to her face. Through her bitter tears, she replied, "Never."
"What was that? Oh, I know. That was the stupid woman saying she was gonna get her ass back here now and listen to me. Hey, stupid woman, grab me another beer."
Mallory glared as she walked out the door.
"Joanie," Josh whispered, "I don't understand."
"You know, for a scholar, you're rather inept."
"Shove it. I just wanted to know how I fit into this," he said, waving his arms to signal the scene around him.
"You see, Leo was a good friend of our family, and of you. Without you, mom and dad were upset when I died. So upset, by the way, they cut off all communication with their old friends, thus living the rest of their dismal lives in solitude."
"You've been practicing that, haven't you?"
"Yup."
"That's what I thought."
The faint sound of "Musetta's Waltz" caused Josh to turn around. "This is bad on so many levels," he said, feeling like Sam.
Standing over the siblings was a fully armed Leo McGarry. "I've lived through a war, I can get through two God-damned trespassers.
"Josh," Joanie whispered, "grab my hand."
"What?"
"Don't ask questions, just do it!"
"Okay," he said, reaching for her hand.
"One," Joanie whispered.
"Two," Josh responded.
"THREE," they yelled in unison while Joanie transported them outside of the Manchester house.