Title: The Last Encounter
Author: MissAnnThropic
Spoilers: Attack of the Clones
Summary: The last time Padme ever saw Anakin... and the first time she saw Darth Vader.
Disclaimer: I own nasing! Really, I don't. All you see here (that you recognize, anyway) is the creation of someone else. I take no credit.

The historic ruins of the ruling body of the planet Naboo's first parliament had stood unused for generations, a tribute to the planet's progress and nothing more... an oddity of reverence and nostalgia that had ceased to serve as anything more than a site and abstract source of pride for the natives of Naboo. Over a hundred years ago the governmental system of Naboo outgrew its meager beginnings, and rather than deface that which spawned it, the politicians had moved to a new location across the continent to a new, grander palace where the elected Queen and her chamber of advisors and senators saw to the continuity among the people of Naboo. If nothing else, the people of Naboo were deeply rooted in their pasts... families lived in practically unchanged family homes whose architecture and appearance hearkened back to some of Naboo's oldest eras. In that same spirit the old ruling house had not been demolished or forgotten... it had been maintained carefully in the glorified condition it had seen as it birthed a stable government. It was tended, cherished, but in all literal sense abandoned. It stood empty for history and posterity for years upon years, empty halls a hitched breath from the bustle that had once burgeoned against the confines of the small building (in comparison to the grand palace of later years). Surely, had it sentience, it did not expect to ever again see a soul seeking shelter.

A surety, like so many others in the universe, that had inverted or perished at onset of the Clone Wars.

The historic building's halls were dark, a hollow carapace of the soul of Naboo. The only light was that which filtered in through the high-set stained glass windows in the main halls and the small windows within individual state rooms when the portals were not covered and sealed.

Into the lancing light piercing the darkness of one such small room a figure interposed itself from out of the blackness. The light sought out the flesh of life, moving through the thin cloth of the slim figure's robe and shadowing her body. Her light blue dress and robes swayed softly around her shadowed frame, curly brown hair cascading down her back and tendriling over her shoulders... tickling the blanket which swaddled the bundle in her arms.

The infant within the cloth's folds whimpered softly, lifting one arm toward his mother's face and tiny hand opening and clasping shut before tucking back against his small body in a burrowing precursor to sleep.

The young mother's body continued to sway softly, dancing in the sparse light, soothing her child into slumber. At times, it seemed like she swayed like this forever and that nothing outside the room could touch them... not time nor danger. For a time, it was as though the universe in all its grandeur and cruelty forgot about her and her offspring, tucked away in a small pocket of life that held no consequence to anything else alive. She could pretend for the most fleeting of moments that she had no worries outside of caring for her twins.

The male child stirred in her arms faintly, not making a sound. Padme looked down into his face, shadowed softly by the gentle light from the window. He and his sister were barely a month old, so small and helpless in a terrifying way because nothing in these times could afford to be so defenseless. Even so young, the infant brother and sister were two completely different people. The boy was vigorous, stronger and bolder than his sister. The girl was gentle and soft, the flip to her brother's demeanor, speaking of a patience to her nature her sibling did not seem to have.

So young, and already Padme felt as though she'd known them all her life. In a sense, she had. Looking at her children, she saw in them pieces of herself and pieces of their father.

The small boy in her arms blinked open his eyes, seeking his mother's face. Her son had his father's eyes.

Padme smiled faintly, feeling the tug of sadness in her lips always even as she reacted lovingly to her son. She could not smile as she once did anymore, not even for her children. There was so much that refused her even a second's release for the sake of her children.

"Sweet Luke..." Padme whispered softly, cradling the baby in one arm and freeing up her other to bring a hand to his face, brushing her finger along the baby's smooth cheek. Luke's lips smacked and dribbled spit as he continued to watch his mother's face with those familiar blue eyes. Padme smiled sadly at him again, continuing to sway on her feet.

Over her shoulder, her daughter in the infants' bassinet grunted petulantly... but only once. Once, she knew, was all that she need do to get her mother's attention.

Padme turned back to the shadows where the basket sat, moving toward it and once at its side lowering Luke into the cradle with his sister. Luke waved his arms at Padme, blue eyes nearly as piercing even in infancy as his father's, then turned his head to his sister and settled. Leia ceased her idle kicking and laid on her side facing her returned brother, accepting his offered hand and sticking it in her mouth... sucking on his knuckles as though it were her own hand.

When they'd been born, the nursemaids had tried to put Luke in one basket and Leia in another. The babies had protested the separation, comforted by the presence of the other they had known the entirety of their lives from their earliest moments of life and missing the loss of their companion. Luke and Leia both were calmer, happier, together... side by side as they had been in the womb.

Padme stood over them, watching.

Leia ceased her suckling on her brother's hand to cast her eyes toward her mother, brown eyes seeming to search her mother even though Padme knew she could not be doing so... she was only a child.

The Force is strong in them.

Padme's sorrowful smile turned into a frown at remembrance of Obi-Wan Kenobi's words when he'd first seen the newborn children of Padme Amidala and his once Jedi Padawan apprentice. Perhaps Leia was looking for something from her mother... some kind of explanation. Padme understood so little of the Force; could it make a child realize it had explanations due it? Would any means of explanation be enough for someone who knew so little of right and wrong?

Padme sat slowly in the chair beside the bassinet, one hand draped into the basket and brushing over her children's tender skin as though to reaffirm every moment that they were really there. Leia and Luke were quiet, watching her. Their gazes were disconcerting. The Force is strong in them. What could she tell them, how could they understand that which she did not even know herself?

How could she tell them what had become of their father?

Padme titled her head faintly while lost in thought, looking in at her children as they lay side by side in their bedding. They stood for something so pure, so innocent and true, despite the clouds that billowed around that untainted union. They'd been born of love... the love Padme Amidala had had for Anakin Skywalker.

"Your father..." she spoke gently, almost as though to herself, "used to hold me, put his arms around me, and when he did, I felt that it was with more than one man alone could give." Padme brushed her fingers over Leia's fine hair as she spoke. She talked to the children of their father often. Not of the man now whose shadow was the ghost of Anakin Skywalker, but the good person Padme had bore these children to. She felt her children had a right to know about the parent they had never seen or touched, the loving soul they had never felt through the special bond the Force would have allowed. She could not bring herself to say anything negative to her children about their father no more than she could bare to accept it.

"I don't know the Force or what it feels like, but I think Anakin held me in the arms of that when he pulled me into his. I could feel so much more than just his love around me, but I knew it was him, too. Maybe you will understand someday, more than I ever could, but I felt like a thousand Anakins held me when I was in his arms... each loving me as much as the one I could touch. I loved them all equally..." she smiled sadly, "your father tried my heart by asking it to love so much."

Luke waved his arms, seeking attention. Padme moved her hand from Leia's head and let Luke wrap his hand around her index finger. He flexed his fingers around her digit, appeased, then tracked his blue eyes back to his mother's face. He looked so much like Anakin.

Padme bit her lip faintly, drawn into the memories. So much of the time it seemed like all was memory... such was the curse of regrets and unanswered questions. Unsolved mysteries that had no ending.

Padme felt her face muscles tighten, threatening to besiege her with tears again as she said, "The Anakin I knew would have loved you both very much..." she ran her thumb over Luke's tiny knuckles, "you should have known the love of a thousand fathers."

Leia's eyelids drew shut slowly, descending her into sleep. Luke pulled away from his mother and turned to watch Leia, sparkling eyes attentive. Luke always watched over his sister, almost seeming to stand guard while she slept until sleep claimed him too. Even then, they slept always in physical contact. Somehow, some way they would touch... if Padme took one out the other would feel their sibling's disappearance and awake. They were bound and bonded more deeply than any two beings could be, intertwined by love, blood, and the Force.

Padme withdrew softly from her children's bedside and returned to the window, looking out at the vista provided by Naboo. Her eyes were on the rocky cliff walls and sprawling fields, but her mind and heart were elsewhere. Her heart was seeking answers for questions that, it seemed, had none.

Anakin hung in her soul like a wet blanket... a burden to be sure, but yet one she did not know that she wished to shed. She loved him... for all she'd heard of him now, she loved him still. Perhaps that was the folly of unconditional love, for she should hate him for the beast he had become but her love did not wither. She couldn't find enough in herself to do that... she couldn't hate the one who'd meant more than breath to her.

Her heart wouldn't let her betray him even when he'd seemed to betray everything of himself.

Padme dropped her head sadly, lost in the past. No one knew Anakin like she had, saw into him wholly and completely as she could, and for the life of her she could not find the point at which that dark demon within him had consumed the good man she loved and transformed her lover into a monster.

Maybe it was her love for him that had blinded her to seeing it. The first hint should have been when he confessed to her on Tatooine before the beginning of the Clone Wars of slaughtering an entire tribe of Tusken Raiders without remorse. He'd called them animals, that they deserved to die... but he'd been crying as he said it. Monsters, true beasts, didn't cry for their crimes. Demons did not weep or ache for the death of their mothers. A glimmer of his dark impulses had been revealed to her that day, but in the shape of a wounded and angry boy, not a vicious creature. He'd shown her his pain, sought the solace and trust he knew he could find in her, and she'd given it to him. It had not been beastly, it had been human. Even now, with hindsight as her equalizer, she saw it as she had then.

She had to consider that she had not wanted to see it so badly that she'd insulated herself from the truth. Because even now, she could remember only love.

After their secret marriage on Naboo, their real lives had demanded of them, and they had understood that the times would require great sacrifices and tolerances.

She did not see Anakin for long periods of time while he fought with the other Jedi in the Clone Wars. When his campaigns took him near Naboo, he diverted to see her. It was irresponsible and unbefitting of a Jedi to abandon his missions to make time for her when the times were so dire, but his visits gave her new life and strength. She watched the War change him, but never a monster. Never a beast.

Each visit back he was a little older in the eyes, a little wiser with his body, and a little harsher in his thoughts... but never to her. He came to Naboo in secret to meet her and a youthful light was in his eyes, a childish easiness in his movements, and his thoughts and words the professes of love. She saw two Anakins during the War, the one embittered by the fighting and the one that frolicked in fields with her. She'd accepted the dichotomy... she had it, too. No war was easy on those involved, but in each other's company when they could steal it they remembered why it had to be fought.

His visits grew less frequent nearing the end of the Clone Wars. When he came, he was that much darker and terse. He stopped telling her how he'd acquired his new scars, found the loving tongue of a poet harder to invoke, became harsher and more desperate in his embraces... but always, after a time, he would be the Anakin she knew. Maybe a more weathered and older version, but Anakin nonetheless. Love rooted out the Anakin Skywalker core in him, and Padme thought nothing beyond that or his arms.

The day that made her heart cold with fear had been when one of the straggling forces of droid soldiers struck Naboo. The palace and government building had been demolished with little forewarning. The Queen dead as well as a number of senators and politicians. Had Padme been in the ruling house at the time, she would have been killed.

When Anakin next came to her (shortly after the attack, which suggested he'd dropped everything to come find her), it was with a fiery fury billowing from him in hot waves that Padme didn't need the Force to feel. He told Padme that the Jedi Council had warning that Naboo might be a target, that they knew there was a danger, but they had wasted time in talks with the remnants of the Republic Senate on the allocation of forces to defend the planet when the droids struck. Only when his mother was killed had she seen Anakin so enraged. Because courses of action had to be discussed with so many voices, because no one voice ruled over the others and sped decisions of such great importance (despite the official right of emergency power given Supreme Chancellor Palpatine), Anakin came close to losing Padme. It was by luck alone that she was not in the government hall that day when the attack came.

He told her of his waverings with the Jedi Council and the Republic then. She should have been concerned by Anakin's oscillating loyalty or his anger, but in truth she shared it, too. Her planet had not been warned of their possible endangerment for fear they would mount an offensive that might alter the objectives of the remaining droid forces when Naboo might not have been a target at all. As a politician she could understand their discretion, but as a loyal and patriotic native of Naboo she was furious. They should have been warned and protected by the Republic. Their membership in the Senate guaranteed them that, but it had not been given.

Padme had not know at the time, but at the time of that visit with Anakin she was two months pregnant with the twins.

Anakin returned to the war, and Padme did not hear from him again. If she had had time to search for him (to tell him of her recently discovered pregnancy), she would have, but shortly thereafter the Clone Wars were coming to a close and times were nearly as hectic as when the war first began. Deprived of their elected Queen and a great many of their senior senators, the people of Naboo rallied for Padme, once loved Queen, to take on the role as ruler of their planetary government... a task she rose to out of a sense of loyalty and duty.

Then word began circulating that something within the remaining Republic Senate was happening that no one had expected. Palpatine was separating from the old senate and taking a good number of planetary systems with him as well as the clone forces who had helped with the war. So much in that time was rumor alone, but one such rumor was that a rogue Jedi had joined with Palpatine... and dark things seemed to be brewing in the near future.

Palaptine and his forces, coming together under a new united name of 'The Empire' began a process of turning their ruling system and the planets loyal to them into a dictatorship government system. Weak and battered Old Republic planets and allies had no choice but to seek refuge under the Empire and conform to their rules to gain their protection and support, adopting Palpatine as their king or emperor as the price.

Most chilling of all, stories that Palpatine's rogue Jedi was hunting and slaughtering the Jedi Knights with frightening efficiency.

Padme remembered the moment she heard that that rogue Jedi was Anakin Skywalker, although she could not recall the words or place. She remembered only a sinking feeling of dread and outright denial. They had to be wrong... hunting down the Jedi? Not Ani.

The first holos reached Naboo with chilling finality. Images of the carnage done to resisting pockets of Old Republic-loyal forces, propaganda vids for the Empire... images of Palpatine with Anakin Skywalker's shadowed image standing behind his shoulder.

For days Padme had been in shock, moving in a daze while the children of Anakin Skywalker grew in her belly, unable to connect whole thoughts. Like a downpour, news flowed into Naboo. Padme saw Anakin in security vids slashing down weaponless civilians, without remorse burning through mothers holding infants and the elderly cringing from his form just as fervently and easily as he cut down resisting soldiers. He was all the monster he was said to be.

Padme saw it, always in the back of her mind a part of her screaming 'that's not Anakin!'. This transformation had been too abrupt, too unexpected... it could not be true.

She was only a month from delivery when Obi-Wan Kenobi came to Naboo to find her. Then she knew it was true. Upon first sight of him she saw it in the old Jedi's face... the look of a man who'd lost a dear friend while at the same time had been borne upon by more horrors than any one soul had right to bear.

Obi-Wan had been frozen in his spot to see her, abdomen distended in pregnancy. A surprise to him, without doubt. He hadn't asked if the child within her was Anakin's... perhaps by Force or common sense alone he knew. He said only that he had to speak to her urgently, and they'd retired to a palace secure room to talk.

Obi-Wan was a sickening affirmation of everything Padme had not wanted to believe. He recounted to her, sparing no detail out of mercy, the changes in his Padawan during the war... and that the attack on Naboo had seemed to have been the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. The anger and fear in Anakin had been overwhelming, and the lure of the Dark Side to help correct the wrongs he saw too strong. Anakin Skywalker had been turned to the Dark Side of the Force, and as was Anakin's nature, when he committed to something he did so under full steam. He was utterly and irretrievably lost.

Padme had listened, heard him, but his words were almost flat... as though they belonged elsewhere. She knew now it had been shock... she wasn't sure it had ever worn off.

Obi-Wan had finally told her that the reason he'd come was that she was in danger. Palpatine was very proud indeed of his new apprentice, powerful beyond any other Jedi still left alive, and apparently his young apprentice was completely forthright to his new master. Somehow, Palpatine learned about Anakin Skywalker's love affair with Padme Amidala of Naboo.

Palpatine recognized in his new protege a weakness. His services might be pledged completely to the Empire's emperor and his goals, but another outside influence held strong in whatever small part of Anakin might remain in the new Dark Lord. Padme's ability to cloud Anakin's thoughts and feelings was a threat he was unwilling to risk.

Anakin Skywalker had been ordered to hunt down his lover and slay her in the name of his new master.

Padme could not comprehend that, but she'd seen the holos, she heard Obi-Wan's words, and she trusted him. She agreed to be hidden away for her protection... against her own husband.

Obi-Wan had said only of the unborn children, "Did he know?"

Past tense... 'did he'... as if Anakin had died and another creature had crawled into his skin and taken over. As though not a shred of the man she'd loved lived any longer.

Padme had been taken to this abandoned governing house while Obi-Wan left again. Padme had no doubts about where Obi-Wan had gone... he was going to find his former student, his former friend and nearly foster-son... to fight and hope to kill him. It was more than Padme could deal with, so she blocked it out of her mind as she was secreted away. Obi-Wan would have preferred her to leave Naboo, but she was still responsible to the people, and when she had nothing else Amidala had always had her sense of duty. During those dark hours, it had been the only thing that focused her away from despair.

She saw Obi-Wan only once more after that, shortly after word had been passed to him that Padme Amidala had given birth to twins. It was when he'd given her yet another worry to carry in her heart. The Force is strong in them. He'd seemed as forlorn about it as Padme had felt upon hearing him declare that of her newborns. The Force was what had stolen Anakin from her (Obi-Wan tried to explain to her how that wasn't exactly true, but she didn't understand the Force enough nor did she care to). That same Force was in her children, the last bit she held of that love she'd shared with Anakin Skywalker.

Obi-Wan had reported during his short visit that as soon as she was able and it was safe she should leave the planet... that Anakin was closing.

Her intelligence advisors watched for an opening in which to flee the planet, but Imperial scouters were too frequent. They would be spotted, so they were grounded for nearly a month on Naboo waiting.

Padme looked out the window again... waiting.

She had been so lost in her thoughts that the sound of hurried footsteps in the hall took her by surprise, causing her to startle as she turned to face the room door as it was practically thrown open. A young man stumbled in, sweaty and out of breath, holding something in his hand, "Senator... urgent... Obi-Wan... message..."

Padme quickly went to the messenger, taking the recorder from his hand and laying it flat in her palm, activating the device.

Obi-Wan Kenobi's image appeared in a hologram before her. He was in bad shape... cuts and bruises covering his face, one eye swollen shut, his lip split and slurring his words slightly... it looked like speaking was painful for him.

"Senator Amidala, I apologize for not coming to you in person, but in my condition I could not get there fast enough for what I must relay to you. Vader is alive... he knows where you are... he's coming. You have to leave immediately..."

Padme closed her fist over the recorder, pausing the device, looked quickly at the runner who was catching his breath, "When?"

The messenger looked ashy, "A matter of minutes at best... there were three others with me... they turned back to slow Vader down."

Padme knew what the meant... they'd sacrificed their lives to give her precious seconds to save herself and her children.

She turned back to the recorder and opened her hand again.

"It's up to you, Senator Amidala. I could not defeat him, he's too strong. The Dark Side... too far gone for me... but you. He is wounded, unfocused... for you there could be... he might hesitate. You have to take that opportunity. You have to kill..."

Padme quickly closed her fist again, halting the message, her heart pounding in her chest. 'Kill him'... Obi-Wan was asking her to kill Anakin Skywalker. Not only that, but make use of the heartbeat's pause the buried remnants of Anakin Skywalker inside him might give her to gun him down. Shoot her husband, her love, the father of her children.

Kill him or chance him finding out about his own offspring and butchering them for his master. She could almost not fathom him being able to do it... not Anakin.

Bustling out in the halls told her that her servants were alerted and already scrambling to leave.

"Senator?" the runner before her asked anxiously, prompting action from her... anything but standing numbly in the doorway.

Cooing cries from the bassinet caused Padme to turn and look over her shoulder toward the babies. Luke and Leia were tucked helpless in bed, depending on her to save their lives.

Padme almost nodded in resignation, dropping the recorder on the floor, crushing it underfoot, then calling for her servant. A woman who'd been with Padme since she was a childhood queen came immediately, Padme pausing a split second before saying in a dejected voice, "Get Luke and Leia out of here to safety... and give me your blaster."

The servant handed over her hand blaster to Padme then rushed past her into the room and scooped up both babies, one in each arm. She returned hastily to the door and stopped before the messenger, handing Luke to him. "Here," she said as she deposited the boy into the man's arms, "if I get caught there's no reason both children should be, too."

The messenger nodded, tucked the blanket tighter around Luke, and moved after the servant with Leia... breaking off to head down another hall to a different exit.

Padme watched them go, snapping back to attention when she heard blaster fire at the end of the hall. Shouts from her loyal guards, screams, footfalls.

She took a deep breath, gripping the blaster tighter in her hand and preparing to face Vader. That's what the others called him, that was what Anakin called himself now... Darth Vader. Maybe if she could face him instead of Anakin, she could do what had to be done.

Padme moved down the hall toward the front entrance. The screams of her guards had been cut short an eternity of three seconds ago. Not a sound moved through the old building, the light from the stained windows as frozen and unrushed as it had been an hour ago. Her feet carried her forward, her heart pulled her back in time, and everything around her seemed to slow to a crawl.

She saw the figure approaching from the end of the hallway. The main door had been swung wide open and left that way... light poured in and silhouetted the figure moving toward her. Light reflected off the floor and cast his shadow into a long eerie finger of black portent. He moved like she remembered, his dark robes billowing around him as he strode toward her.

She couldn't hear his footsteps past the rushing of blood in her ears, and the lack of further proof of his presence made him seem surreal... like a ghost in her dreams, hopeful dreams of reunion that had been frequent visitors in her sleep. Dreams of happiness... nothing like this nightmare.

Padme stopped in the hallway, blaster at her side, steeling herself to face down Darth Vader. As he moved through the dark hall, he activated his lightsaber, sending a hideous red glow against the dark material of his clothing as he walked.

He moved toward her, cloaked in shadow, until he was but ten feet from her. A high window cast light into his path, and when it touched him he stopped.

Padme saw Anakin. She had tried so hard to see this monstrous Darth Vader, but she saw in front of her now Anakin Skywalker... her love. He'd been hurt. A wound on his cheek was left untended... caked blood stood in contrast to the dark purple and blue around the cut. Another deep gash was on his head, ripping into his hairline and exposing tender, pink flesh underneath that had also become black with dried blood.

Padme felt her grip on her blaster loosen. Something in her told her, in an instant of unbidden thought, to take care of him.

She sought his eyes, the blue depths she had found so much in... and at last she believed. What she saw in his once-loving and compassionate eyes was a veil of rage, fear, hatred... everything that had betrayed Anakin. The rage of the Tusken Raiders, the fear of seeing his mother hurt in his dreams... they were all of the Anakin she recognized that remained. The loving creature she'd known there was gone... he was a deep well of blackness and hate.

And that was more than she could bear. Her Anakin... her love Ani, lost behind a new beast that had his face. Turned against himself, only for feeling everything, even the hate, so deeply. At that moment, it was too much injustice for Padme to withstand and she almost welcomed death for the release it would offer.

Padme knew she should be taking advantage of his pause... jump on the hesitation Obi-Wan said would be allowed her and shoot him dead... end it all for everyone. She knew she should, but her arm was unmoving by her side.

It was at the thought of death that she realized she'd not been killed yet. Ana...Vader was standing the same distance from her, completely still. He'd not advanced on her to strike her down as he'd come to do... instead he stood in his spot, lightsaber active and humming dangerously at his side but not moving.

Just as she'd known Anakin had truly been lost, she also knew that the very fact of his pause meant SOMETHING of the man who'd loved Padme was still there... and THAT Anakin Skywalker Padme could not bring herself to raise a weapon against.

And for all the mercy and irony in the galaxy, she stood there with weapon in hand and knew that she still loved him.

This was the same Anakin who'd forsaken his future for the love of her, thought of her every day for ten years after they parted, disobeyed the Jedi Code to marry her, had stood in the face of death to protect her... who'd at first meeting with her thought her an angel.

She sought his eyes again, seeking past the rage, the monster, looking for the Anakin she knew. It was a dark, deep vat of hatred she saw, but if anyone could see beyond it to the man he once was, she could.

Something flashed in his gaze as she searched him... something fleeting, so fast Padme blinked and thought she'd imagined it, but something beside the rage had been there. She was certain... she felt it in her heart, more than the Force could have ever told her. More trusted than even the word of Obi-Wan Kenobi had been.

She'd come to kill him, but she could not do it. The blaster would remain unused in her hand, even if it did so up until the split second she was struck down by the lightsaber's energy by her lover's hand.

She was ready for that. To die was nothing... to have killed her love would have been a fate far worse.

Padme waited for him to move, to attack. A pause for her was one thing, but surely he would move against her soon. She had taken her moment, the second's pause in which the deep-buried Anakin inside this Vader persona balked at killing his wife, but that time was to be fleeting.

Vader loomed before her, even at some distance a giant to her, the harbinger of evil itself. The ease with which he could dispense death like a fog hovering around him.

Padme was surprised to find she was not afraid. She stood tall, prepared, and thought clearly 'Go on, Ani... do what you must, but know I died still loving you... despite it all'.

He had to have read that thought, it was a bantha on Hoth, and Padme took comfort in being able to tell him one more time that she loved him. Found in herself a great peace at finding herself able to love him still after what he'd done and become.

Finally Anakin moved... more of a flinch than smooth motion... but it was a flinch away from her.

Padme watched him, waiting.

Anakin was still a moment, but this time a tense stillness, then he took a step away. Padme could only stand there, unmoving.

Anakin took another step backward, then another. He was moving farther and farther away from her. A part of her wanted him to come back, just to see Anakin again, but she let him go.

Anakin deactivated his lightsaber, staring at her from the dark shadows a moment, then turned in a sweep of his dark robe and strode back toward the main door. He didn't look back, and Padme said not a word to stop him.

Then he was gone.

Padme wasn't sure how long she stood there, blaster still in hand. Something in her was waiting for him to come back... part of her always would. The rest knew he'd given the last show of love his blackened heart could manage. He'd spared her, couldn't kill her for what they'd shared when they'd been different people.

For that show of strength, even in darkness, Padme could love him too.

She wondered what Obi-Wan would think when he found out that she'd had a chance and let him go. Maybe it would condemn her too for what Anakin...for what Darth Vader would do in the new life he'd created for himself. The blood that he spilled would be on her hands for letting him go. Obi-Wan would be disappointed and sad.

Condemnation so be it... the only blood on her hands she couldn't live with was that of Anakin Skywalker. Though she knew she would feel the grief of every life Vader destroyed, knowing had she been stronger she could have prevented it, it was a burden she could sooner shoulder than murdering her own husband.

And the twins... they would have to be protected. Somehow she'd have to keep them safe, find a way to keep them from their father and his new master. Perhaps Obi-Wan would know a way.

She knew Obi-Wan would do it. Just as she could not kill the most vicious predator in the galaxy, Obi-Wan would safeguard the children of that same beast tenaciously.

It seemed that, deep down, neither could let Anakin Skywalker go... even if Anakin himself had.

END