While they Walked
Chapter 3: Secrets
Frodo was humming. It was a tune he had heard Legolas singing and from time to time he'd add in few words he'd picked up.
"Oh no, Legolas, You've gone and got Frodo monging again!" said Merry.
"He hasn't has he? Oh will we be plagued by it forever?" Frodo stopped humming and sighed audibly, drawing smiles from both Merry and Pippin.
"I'm sorry, what is it I am being accused of?" Inquired Legolas, a true lack of understanding showed on his face.
"Oh you know, monging!"
"I am afraid I don't know, is it some kind of Shire talk? Like those mathoms I've heard you talk of?"
"No, no." assured Frodo, "This is pure Pippin and Merry talk as you might be able to tell from Sam's face." Legolas glanced over to Sam to see that no light of understanding shone through his face either.
"Then what, may I ask, is 'monging'?" Merry and Pippin came either side of Legolas and began to talk in a business-like manner.
"Well, you see,"
"It goes back a long time,"
"To when I was just eighteen I should think,"
"We found Frodo in the kitchen singing,"
"But he didn't know all the words,"
"So he hummed in some places."
"We realised he did it all the time,"
"So we decided it should be given a name.
"We thought it was a cross between music and singing, so we called it monging."
"Surely minging would be more accurate?" said Legolas, who should, by all rights, have had severe whiplash after looking from one hobbit to the next so quickly.
"That's what we thought at first, but we decided monging sounded better."
"We drove him to learn all the words of a song before he started singing it and so stopped any monging in Bag End,"
"But it seems you've started him off again."
"Is this something I should be ashamed of?"
"Not sure, it does mean we can tease him about it again."
"You two do seem to pick on Frodo rather."
"We're only taking our revenge. He and Bilbo together managed to refine the teasing of young relatives to an art in itself."
"He did nothing but tease me for the first fifteen years of my life, I was traumatised."
"Frodo doesn't seem like one to tease." Said Boromir, who had been listening with half an ear, if only because their conversation would be more interesting than the owls hooting.
"That would be what he wants you to think. Very cunning, Frodo is."
"Look you two, if you are going to tell sordid secrets of my past, then you could at least try to get me somewhere away from the conversation."
"Sordid secrets! I'll show you sordid secrets!" said Pippin rather loudly, he went over and whispered extremely quietly in Frodo's ear, not even Legolas could hear what he said. Frodo's eyes opened wide.
"Merry!" He said in shock, "And with Estella? She's Fatty's sister! What would he say?" Merry looked at Pippin in complete disbelief.
"You didn't." Pippin smiled smugly and Frodo began to laugh. "You promised you'd never tell anyone!"
"I did no such thing! I just never did tell anyone and you assumed that I'd promised, you were too drunk to remember that much of the night."
"Merry! Drunk! Now that's a sight I'd like to see!" said Boromir with an amused smile.
"It really isn't, if he's not trying to punch you in the face, he's dampening your shoulder with various liquids from his face."
"Sounds very similar to Faramir to me." Said Boromir, mostly to himself.
"There Merry," Said Pippin, patting Merry reassuringly on the back, "Even noble men make complete fools of themselves when they're drunk." Merry spun and grabbed Pippin's arm and tried to get him on the ground, but Pippin had been expecting exactly that and managed, to everyone's surprise, to reverse the roles, leaving Pippin victorious.
"The lad wasn't lying, he is good at wrestling." Remarked Gimli.
"Don't worry Mr. Merry," said Sam smiling to himself, "I know a few secrets someone here wouldn't like me to tell anyone." Pippin immediately jumped off Merry and ran to Sam and would have got on his knees if they weren't walking.
"No Sam, please don't. I'll do any thing, I swear." He looked very desperate.
"Half your meals for a week?"
"Yes." Answered Pippin immediately, everyone looked at each other quite astonished.
"And you can do all the cooking. I want to be the last to get up for a change."
"Yes, certainly, fine. Anything else?" Sam gave Pippin a calculating look.
"No, that should do just fine." Pippin was visibly relieved, and for once embarrassed to be the centre of attention.
"Aragorn! Can I walk with you?" Pippin rushed off to walk next to Aragorn.
"What on earth can dear innocent Pippin have done?" asked Boromir, quite astounded with what had come to pass.
"He was more drunk than Merry was and as a result, perhaps a little too open with some things."
The hobbits smiled contentedly in the knowledge that they had something to use against the seemingly infallible Peregrin Took. The rest of them, as always, were mildly confused.
Chapter 3: Secrets
Frodo was humming. It was a tune he had heard Legolas singing and from time to time he'd add in few words he'd picked up.
"Oh no, Legolas, You've gone and got Frodo monging again!" said Merry.
"He hasn't has he? Oh will we be plagued by it forever?" Frodo stopped humming and sighed audibly, drawing smiles from both Merry and Pippin.
"I'm sorry, what is it I am being accused of?" Inquired Legolas, a true lack of understanding showed on his face.
"Oh you know, monging!"
"I am afraid I don't know, is it some kind of Shire talk? Like those mathoms I've heard you talk of?"
"No, no." assured Frodo, "This is pure Pippin and Merry talk as you might be able to tell from Sam's face." Legolas glanced over to Sam to see that no light of understanding shone through his face either.
"Then what, may I ask, is 'monging'?" Merry and Pippin came either side of Legolas and began to talk in a business-like manner.
"Well, you see,"
"It goes back a long time,"
"To when I was just eighteen I should think,"
"We found Frodo in the kitchen singing,"
"But he didn't know all the words,"
"So he hummed in some places."
"We realised he did it all the time,"
"So we decided it should be given a name.
"We thought it was a cross between music and singing, so we called it monging."
"Surely minging would be more accurate?" said Legolas, who should, by all rights, have had severe whiplash after looking from one hobbit to the next so quickly.
"That's what we thought at first, but we decided monging sounded better."
"We drove him to learn all the words of a song before he started singing it and so stopped any monging in Bag End,"
"But it seems you've started him off again."
"Is this something I should be ashamed of?"
"Not sure, it does mean we can tease him about it again."
"You two do seem to pick on Frodo rather."
"We're only taking our revenge. He and Bilbo together managed to refine the teasing of young relatives to an art in itself."
"He did nothing but tease me for the first fifteen years of my life, I was traumatised."
"Frodo doesn't seem like one to tease." Said Boromir, who had been listening with half an ear, if only because their conversation would be more interesting than the owls hooting.
"That would be what he wants you to think. Very cunning, Frodo is."
"Look you two, if you are going to tell sordid secrets of my past, then you could at least try to get me somewhere away from the conversation."
"Sordid secrets! I'll show you sordid secrets!" said Pippin rather loudly, he went over and whispered extremely quietly in Frodo's ear, not even Legolas could hear what he said. Frodo's eyes opened wide.
"Merry!" He said in shock, "And with Estella? She's Fatty's sister! What would he say?" Merry looked at Pippin in complete disbelief.
"You didn't." Pippin smiled smugly and Frodo began to laugh. "You promised you'd never tell anyone!"
"I did no such thing! I just never did tell anyone and you assumed that I'd promised, you were too drunk to remember that much of the night."
"Merry! Drunk! Now that's a sight I'd like to see!" said Boromir with an amused smile.
"It really isn't, if he's not trying to punch you in the face, he's dampening your shoulder with various liquids from his face."
"Sounds very similar to Faramir to me." Said Boromir, mostly to himself.
"There Merry," Said Pippin, patting Merry reassuringly on the back, "Even noble men make complete fools of themselves when they're drunk." Merry spun and grabbed Pippin's arm and tried to get him on the ground, but Pippin had been expecting exactly that and managed, to everyone's surprise, to reverse the roles, leaving Pippin victorious.
"The lad wasn't lying, he is good at wrestling." Remarked Gimli.
"Don't worry Mr. Merry," said Sam smiling to himself, "I know a few secrets someone here wouldn't like me to tell anyone." Pippin immediately jumped off Merry and ran to Sam and would have got on his knees if they weren't walking.
"No Sam, please don't. I'll do any thing, I swear." He looked very desperate.
"Half your meals for a week?"
"Yes." Answered Pippin immediately, everyone looked at each other quite astonished.
"And you can do all the cooking. I want to be the last to get up for a change."
"Yes, certainly, fine. Anything else?" Sam gave Pippin a calculating look.
"No, that should do just fine." Pippin was visibly relieved, and for once embarrassed to be the centre of attention.
"Aragorn! Can I walk with you?" Pippin rushed off to walk next to Aragorn.
"What on earth can dear innocent Pippin have done?" asked Boromir, quite astounded with what had come to pass.
"He was more drunk than Merry was and as a result, perhaps a little too open with some things."
The hobbits smiled contentedly in the knowledge that they had something to use against the seemingly infallible Peregrin Took. The rest of them, as always, were mildly confused.