"Etienne...ETIENNE!"Madeline's voice roared from the basement."Shut that child up this instant! I am trying to have a moment's peace to figure those illusions He made!" The doctor,my father,Etienne Barye was already at my cradle,placing a soft,cool,but slightly damp rag against my blistering hot forehead. I stared into his worried eyes,my own unusually colored brown-amber eyes glaring at him.I didn't want him,I wasn't testy because of my fever.I was hungry!
That...thing of a mother I had,that I was foolish enough to love at the time,rarely allowed me access to the only food source my month old body would tolerate. My father was always gentle with me in my earliest days,the only peace I ever had was with him. Perhaps though,this was only because he wanted a little doll,a toy,to play with as I would find out later. I continued to cry as my insides rumbled in pain once more.God above,would she ever come?!
Etienne,dense as he was with me sometimes,finally understood as he felt the shake of my empty stomach inside my already too-thin body.He placed me in a bundle of cozy wool blankets and raced down to,yet again,snarl at his lover's irresponsibility. I never payed attention to the curses he uttered,though I remember every word she said that day amazingly clearly. "Well Etienne! If you are so worried about the little leper's stomach,You. may feed her." She sat among pieces of glass,tin and wire,things that I,myself,would use to just the extent as my brotherhad,or perhaps even moreso.
At my infant age,these things were nothing more than priceless objects to test and,as all babies do,shove them directly into my mouth. I began to squirm in my father's arms,but stilled at the first harsh rumbles in my tiny tummy.Etienne was beside himself with anger,he had never really cared about the disease that ravaged my small form,nor the scars I had later in life. "Really Madeleine!"He started,"The child never screams unless she's hungry! She's barely anything but bone and flesh now!You must feed her! She started to speak but he thrust me into her cold thin arm,"Madeleine,I do not care if you're busy with Erik's old toys.Playing with them won't bring him back,and he is almost certainly dead. Take care of the single child you have left! Lest you care to bring another soul like Him into the world." My mother held me until he had finished speaking,trembling with fear and anger. A voice in my mind said,"Erik..? Who is this Erik? A friend to play with?.. A new pet?" Mother had spoken of a dog she'd had named Sasha once or twice,I would have liked a dog of my own. I was really quite a curious baby...child,adolescant and even as an adult,when most pompousley believe they know "all there is to know",my mind still thirsted for new knowledge. The second my father's voice had stopped,I felt pain. Spreading from my tiny head and back,until suddenly,I found myself against his chest. His shocked expression made me blink. Faintly,I was aware that I had just been thrown 10 feet from my mother's chest to my father's. "Never..Etienne..never...speak that...that..THING'S name!"Mother's voice and body shook as she spoke. I couldn't understand,I was far too young,but father did. "You threw her..your only daughter..just because of His name..?"he said,so angered his voice was bt a whisper. Madeleine was highly interested in a singular safety pin. Etienne shook as he carried me back upstairs to the kitchen. As he moved about the room,warming cow's milk for me,his fury was still apparent even in his steps.
Madeleine never came up from the basement as I drank my milk in silence. My father loved my psychotic mother,despite her countless drawbacks. As always,father watched me closely as I drank. The accidental visual examination always came at every meal without fail. "Damn you Madeleine," I heard him whisper,takeing my sore covered arm in his warm,soft hands.
Oh,how I would loathe him for having such silky,gentle,touchable flesh. He had said when I had first gotten the disease that I wouldn't survive a week. Well,that was two weeks ago,I'd doubled his estimate. So long as I could continue this progress...well my future was still bleak,but father's hope grew. His hope,I'd like to believe,is what kept me alive. I was so tired..tired of being ill,tired of Madeleine. I wished father would take me home to Paris. I missed Belle,the old milk cow,and Diane and Nathan,our faithful retrievers. Father rarely permitted me to go outside,he wanted me to be well as soon as possible,which meant nearly being kept in isolation. Oh,it angered me terribly sometimes. I was a spoiled little brat,wanting the outside world in all it's beauty then. How I loved Diane's puppies though,those tiny little fluffballs that licked my fingers and toes. Diane,around four then,and Nathan,three or so,were two of my best friends and father's loyal red haired retrievers.
In my first week of this accursed sickness,Diane had given birth to three gorgeous,squirming puppies. One of father's friends was looking after them while we were here. From the bite I heard in father's voice,I didn't think it would be much longer until our departure. "Stupid...stupid woman.." He muttered as he held my weak figure. After my milk,I was tired..the sort of tired that comes with lack of sleep,and quite a few other ways,as I've stated before. As my eyelids slipped shut,I did not know that when I awoke from this sleep a year would have passed.
That...thing of a mother I had,that I was foolish enough to love at the time,rarely allowed me access to the only food source my month old body would tolerate. My father was always gentle with me in my earliest days,the only peace I ever had was with him. Perhaps though,this was only because he wanted a little doll,a toy,to play with as I would find out later. I continued to cry as my insides rumbled in pain once more.God above,would she ever come?!
Etienne,dense as he was with me sometimes,finally understood as he felt the shake of my empty stomach inside my already too-thin body.He placed me in a bundle of cozy wool blankets and raced down to,yet again,snarl at his lover's irresponsibility. I never payed attention to the curses he uttered,though I remember every word she said that day amazingly clearly. "Well Etienne! If you are so worried about the little leper's stomach,You. may feed her." She sat among pieces of glass,tin and wire,things that I,myself,would use to just the extent as my brotherhad,or perhaps even moreso.
At my infant age,these things were nothing more than priceless objects to test and,as all babies do,shove them directly into my mouth. I began to squirm in my father's arms,but stilled at the first harsh rumbles in my tiny tummy.Etienne was beside himself with anger,he had never really cared about the disease that ravaged my small form,nor the scars I had later in life. "Really Madeleine!"He started,"The child never screams unless she's hungry! She's barely anything but bone and flesh now!You must feed her! She started to speak but he thrust me into her cold thin arm,"Madeleine,I do not care if you're busy with Erik's old toys.Playing with them won't bring him back,and he is almost certainly dead. Take care of the single child you have left! Lest you care to bring another soul like Him into the world." My mother held me until he had finished speaking,trembling with fear and anger. A voice in my mind said,"Erik..? Who is this Erik? A friend to play with?.. A new pet?" Mother had spoken of a dog she'd had named Sasha once or twice,I would have liked a dog of my own. I was really quite a curious baby...child,adolescant and even as an adult,when most pompousley believe they know "all there is to know",my mind still thirsted for new knowledge. The second my father's voice had stopped,I felt pain. Spreading from my tiny head and back,until suddenly,I found myself against his chest. His shocked expression made me blink. Faintly,I was aware that I had just been thrown 10 feet from my mother's chest to my father's. "Never..Etienne..never...speak that...that..THING'S name!"Mother's voice and body shook as she spoke. I couldn't understand,I was far too young,but father did. "You threw her..your only daughter..just because of His name..?"he said,so angered his voice was bt a whisper. Madeleine was highly interested in a singular safety pin. Etienne shook as he carried me back upstairs to the kitchen. As he moved about the room,warming cow's milk for me,his fury was still apparent even in his steps.
Madeleine never came up from the basement as I drank my milk in silence. My father loved my psychotic mother,despite her countless drawbacks. As always,father watched me closely as I drank. The accidental visual examination always came at every meal without fail. "Damn you Madeleine," I heard him whisper,takeing my sore covered arm in his warm,soft hands.
Oh,how I would loathe him for having such silky,gentle,touchable flesh. He had said when I had first gotten the disease that I wouldn't survive a week. Well,that was two weeks ago,I'd doubled his estimate. So long as I could continue this progress...well my future was still bleak,but father's hope grew. His hope,I'd like to believe,is what kept me alive. I was so tired..tired of being ill,tired of Madeleine. I wished father would take me home to Paris. I missed Belle,the old milk cow,and Diane and Nathan,our faithful retrievers. Father rarely permitted me to go outside,he wanted me to be well as soon as possible,which meant nearly being kept in isolation. Oh,it angered me terribly sometimes. I was a spoiled little brat,wanting the outside world in all it's beauty then. How I loved Diane's puppies though,those tiny little fluffballs that licked my fingers and toes. Diane,around four then,and Nathan,three or so,were two of my best friends and father's loyal red haired retrievers.
In my first week of this accursed sickness,Diane had given birth to three gorgeous,squirming puppies. One of father's friends was looking after them while we were here. From the bite I heard in father's voice,I didn't think it would be much longer until our departure. "Stupid...stupid woman.." He muttered as he held my weak figure. After my milk,I was tired..the sort of tired that comes with lack of sleep,and quite a few other ways,as I've stated before. As my eyelids slipped shut,I did not know that when I awoke from this sleep a year would have passed.