I'd like to thank everyone who has taken time to review and/or read the story so far. I hope everyone enjoys the next chapter. If there are any bits you like or don't like please let me know! Cheers Rob

Bruce Wayne Checks In – Chapter Five

Batman was clinging to the side of the hotel just outside a second floor window. He had allowed himself to be seen to lure Tavi and his men to a place he could fight them without endangering hostages. He had his eyes closed and he was concentrating on listening to the footfalls of Tavi's men. There was a small whirring sound. They were sending their robot out to check out the rooms. He checked his utility belt, he was out of darts but he still had a flash grenade left and two ten second charges. Perfect for taking out door locks, windows and hopefully robots. He looked down below. Police and ambulances surrounded the building. There were several spotlights on the building, hunting out targets for the police snipers. He could see Gordon below and he knew he was getting them to avoid the second floor. The window he was next to was smashed to pieces. Still with his eyes closed and concentrating just on the sound of the robot edging closer to the window, he pulled out a ten second charge and threw it through the window. Ten seconds later there was a small explosion as the robot blew up followed by about fifteen seconds worth of sustained machine gun fire. They were getting spooked. Nice. A frightened enemy is already half beaten. Still there was nine left, all heavily armed and armoured, it did not do to get complacent. He knew from bitter experience that one mistake in this game can leave you either dead or worse crippled for life. He started climbing up to the next floor. He needed to get close to finish them off and they were still huddled up at the end of the corridor. Unfortunately they were not splitting up as he had planned. Normally he would wait them out, he had the patience of a rock, but there were hostages at stake and the Joker to capture…

Robin had just woken up from being knocked out when he saw the Joker standing above him holding a knife. He looked to his left where Elaine Roville was hunched up next to him. She was staring at the Joker with undisguised fear. He knew what she felt like.

"Hello dear," said the Joker.

"Go away please go away!" Squeaked Elaine Roville.

"Please don't try your lines out on me! I'm taken. Oooh! Is that a diamond necklace you're wearing? You really shouldn't have!" The Joker tore the necklace off her. "I love your purple dress, we must go to the same tailor." He pocketed the necklace. "Sorry dear, I have an expensive explosives bill. That reminds me has anyone seen my detonator? This hotel is in urgent need of renovation. I always like to start off with a clean slate."

Robin staggered to his feet. He was still feeling woozy and he really didn't feel like a fight. "Leave her alone Joker."

"Bird boy, your up and about! Don't worry I'll soon fix that."

The Joker stabbed at him with his knife. Robin tried to dodge him but the knife caught his sleeve and gouged a thin red line down his arm. "Aaaah!" Robin grabbed the Joker's arm and twisted it. The Joker dropped the knife. With a flick of his wrist it brought another knife from up his sleeve.

"I always carry a spare, Robin! Like your boss? Who will be the next Robin I wonder, boy blunder?"

"A it's B." Alfred's radio crackled into life. He was currently in one of the cleaning cupboards on the ground floor, keeping a low profile as per his instructions.

"Yes sir?"

"This is going to take longer than expected. Seal the doors to the upstairs; jam the lifts and then check on R. He is in the basement, next to the freezer. I'm getting no response when I call him."

"Yes sir."

"And A?"

"Sir?"

"Avoid all contact with the Joker or his men."

"Yes sir."

"Over and out."

"Over and out sir."

That's easy for him to say. He hadn't had years of training. Still he had years of fading in as a servant. He took out a couple of mops and a bucket. What else is there here? Aha! A small shaving mirror. Part of the hotels gift packs no doubt. Gosh you would have thought a hotel like this would use a better class of shaving cream?

Alfred opened the door and stuck the mirror out side. Clear to the left and clear to the right. He opened the door, tucked the two mops under his arm and carried both the buckets out. The lift was at the end of the corridor. He pressed the button for the lift. Bing. He jammed the bucket in the door. The door tried to close but couldn't.

The corridor where the stairwell was was also clear. Alfred jammed one of the mops into the door handle. Alfred tried spinning the other mop like he had seen Robin with his expandable baton. He then felt slightly silly. Right now to get to the basement. Ah. He had just sealed the doors and jammed the lifts. Oh well he could always jam the lift in the basement. He really didn't want to meet the Joker again. He looked a disreputable looking cove and fearfully rude. He had no fighting skills to speak of. Just a minute? He stopped to think. Several years ago the master had tried to teach him some martial arts pressure points and what not. What was it pressure points and meridians of Chi or something? Where were they? On the small of the back and under the collar bone as far as he recalled? Alfred did not like the sound of it at all. It meant getting closer to the enemy. As far as Alfred was concerned the further away the enemy was the better. He gave the mop a few practice jabs as he walked to the lift.

He pushed the bucket into the lift with his foot and pressed the button to the basement with the end of the mop. Gosh that went better than expected. He practiced jabbing the mop a few more times at the lift wall. Not quite Zorro but not bad!

The lift door pinged open. Alfred checked the corridors with the mirror, saw they were empty and walked out. Then he saw him. The Joker! He could see him fighting with Tim! Right. Alfred walked behind the Joker and jabbed him with the mop in the small of the back.

"Ouch!" The Joker cried out. He turned round from trying to stab Robin. "What did you do that for old man!" Alfred jabbed him just under the collarbone. The Joker just looked crosser. Where were those pressure points? He tried to jab him again but the Joker caught the end of the mop and yanked it from his grasp. Robin, bleeding from several small cuts, grabbed the Joker by the neck and pulled him back. The Joker, using the mop, hit Robin on the back of the head and then spun the mop around and hit Alfred on the head. Alfred went flying against the wall. Ooof. Alfred kicked out with his feet and kicked the Joker on the knee. He then stood up and started punching and kicking the Joker. He had never been madder. Nobody attacked his charges. Nobody. Especially not a ridiculous looking harlequin like the Joker.

"Easy old man, you'll give yourself a heart attack," said the Joker, defending himself with his arms. "Or I'll give you a heart attack myself. Actually that sounds more fun."

Robin pushed the Joker down. Alfred carried on punching and kicking the Joker. Calm down. Calm down! Gosh he never usually got this mad. The Joker scrabbled madly with his hands at Robin. Robin punched him under the chin, while Alfred kicked him in the stomach for good measure. He was down! They had got him! Robin quickly slipped some plastic handcuffs on to the Joker.

"Well done sir!" Said Alfred to Robin. "Please let me clean those wounds of yours." It was then Alfred noticed Elaine Roville. She looked very dishevelled, her normal fine hair looking matted and dirty. Her beautiful Karl Largerfield of Chanel dress was dirty and slightly torn from her visit to the freezer.

"Who the hell are you?" She asked. Her normal cut glass accent sounding slightly cracked.

"I'm part of the hotel staff ma'am," said Alfred. "I apologise for the inconvenience this evening."

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN INCONVENIENCE?" She yelled. "I'VE BEEN THREATENED, FROZEN, ROBBED AND NEARLY STABBED BY A CRAZY CLOWN!"

"If you could just keep quiet please?" Said Alfred looking worriedly down the corridor in case any of the Joker's men were about.

"I'LL GIVE YOU QUIET YOU RIDICULOUS OLD MAN…"

Alfred jabbed her just under the neck into her carotid artery. She slumped to the floor. Ah! That's where the pressure points are.

Batman was moving stealthily down the stairs to the second floor. He could hear Tavi and his gang still at the end of the corridor, too scared to leave. He saw the fuse box for this floor and switched off the lights again. He preferred to work in the dark. He didn't like to think of the psychological implications of this. He slipped his star light lenses over his eyes and just stood quietly listening. He knew they had infrared vision. He would leave it a few seconds before attacking them. There was something wrong; he could sense it. He rolled forward down the stairs just as a bullet exploded through the door next to him. They were shooting through the door. He rolled down the stairs and got to his feet just as the door above was kicked down.

"There he is!" Shouted Tavi. "He's armoured, aim for his head!"

Tavi and his men came running out and started shooting down the stair well at Batman.