Notes: Thanks to XxMaster-ExX, Althe, baby-pnut, RuByMoOn17, Kaede Yuki, Vialana, and Ronda-Silverpaw for reviewing! Hope you like this chapter as well! This chapter is set three weeks after the prologue.

A special note to KuRoI-iNu: I thank you for your offer to be my beta-reader. Please give me your e-mail address so I can send you my chapters. Thanks! :)

DISCLAIMER: None of the characters here is mine.

WARNING: This will eventually end up as Roy/Ed. And this chapter has a lot of grammatical mistakes.

Our Past

Author: Atthla

Chapter One: The Theory

–Three weeks later–

At that bright afternoon, the library of Central City was noticeably quiet, serving its role well as a place to read and study. Alphonse huffed in relief as he stepped into the vast books-filled building. Although he could no longer sense the scorching heat of sunlight, he had never liked the blinding sparkle it made on his metal membrane. Even with his lack of eyelids, his eyes were the closest thing to a human's he managed to maintain in spite of everything, which made them still react violently to overwhelming brightness.

As he passed the front desk, Al nodded courteously to a middle-aged woman who was the librarian. The woman smiled in return, acknowledging the armor as a state alchemist's brother who often visited the library in search of his shorter sibling. He came almost every day.

Pacing noisily between shelves of thick books, he looked for a blonde head. His brother often sat at the deepest corner as if by doing so could seclude him from the world and its troubles. Sometimes it saddened the younger one that he had to be the one to pull him out of his sanctuary. Nevertheless, now that he had lost almost all including his mortal body, he could not suffer the bereavement of the very last thing he still had, his brother.

He nearly lost Edward, at least it what was on his mind when he ran mindlessly, breaking through the heavy curtain of hammering rain that night. Afraid that the worst would happen, the Colonel was the only one in his mind who could to help his high-fevered brother, perhaps because it was his name Ed kept calling in his delirium. Roy; he had never thought his brother could say the plain short name that frightened –that appalling– at least not until he learned of the only memory Ed still remembered.

As if he could call it a memory…

The sight of twin golden eyes showering him with terrified looks was still fresh in his mind, unperturbed by the length of three weeks time. It was shocking enough when he found out that his brother suddenly suffered amnesia, but to discover that Edward also no longer recognized him as a brother was far more painful. He forgot everything, even the name Al.

But he remembered Roy, because of that vile memory. And he remembered his own title.

'That was what he called me when he did that. Fullmetal…'

Even now Al still hesitated of what he should believe. Of course, he had tried to convince himself that the Colonel would not do such thing, but was it really feasible to implant an illusory memory, one which had never existed in the first place? The Philosopher's Stone without a doubt possessed a great power beyond imagination, but n idea that it also could create something amorphous was a thing unheard of. Perhaps the Colonel did hold some interest in Ed although his heart vehemently objected the theory. His brother would never allow it to happen, nor would Al and he, to put simply, had never left his brother's side.

Luckily Ed didn't change much –at least he still flaunted a vicious respond after the word 'short', apparently a chronic habit not even amnesia could obliterate. Day after day, he tried to gain everything his memory had lost, which required him to spend most of his free times in the library. It was a true fortune that learning alchemy was more like breathing to the Fullmetal and in two weeks –despite Al's burning protest– the military had decided to try him on another mission.

Edward was strong, too strong for his own good, but he refused to make his little brother worried and thus he tried his best to be the nii-san Al always owned before. It was as if he merely lacked memories, unfazed by the glaring one he still regrettably remembered. Alphonse would have believed that it was nothing but a temporary malfunction of brain if Ed did not preserve his disinclination to meet the Colonel anytime, anywhere, in any occasion.

When three weeks had passed, the blonde alchemist almost regained his old self totally that not even Al could tell the difference. Ed still practiced with him in the morning like always, smacked him square at the head if he was being too noisy, even crack his good-natured laugh when Mayor Armstrong tripped over a fairly visible stone. But when night dawned, when he thought his younger brother had floated into the isle of dreams, he would stare out from their bedroom's window, eyes filled with unspoken longing. Al knew those feelings only too well, for he himself had doubted his own memories once and it was terrible enough. He could hardly imagine what it was like to hold onto memories which were told by others, not by his own past recollection. Apart from that one, of course.

The pain to re-introduce himself to his brother was something Al would never forget. He might not be a person who valued high mindless revenge, but for his brother, he would willingly discard any principle.

Now, where was that brother of his?

"Nii-san?"

True that he got a respond, but it was in the shape of a hiss from a bald state-alchemist who was sitting behind the long table in the middle of the library. Al murmured an apology as he continued to search, roaming between rows of tall shelves; what if for this once his brother chose to take a stroll than read books? Who knew, although the thought was literally impossible considering Ed's current state.

Mounds of thick dark-covered books in the corner of the furthest alley caught his attention and yes, there his brother was. The blond alchemist was sitting cross=-egged amidst giant piles of books which left him pretty much unseen, covered by various bundled manuscripts if Al did not choose to come closer. His brow was creased into a serious frown, eyes following lines printed on the book with a speed that indeed needed his utmost level of concentration.

"Nii-san?" he tried once again, more tentatively.

The older boy snapped his head up immediately at the soft call, golden eyes meeting his brother's white lifeless ones as the impact. Al was startled to see raw fear displayed vividly in Edward's eyes, but it had been impeccably erased before the younger brother could overcome his initial shock. Not even a second later, a quick smile had appeared on the blonde's lips, followed by a reply, no less faster. "Yes, Al?"

Being a simple-minded little brother, Al would have believed the unimpeachable act if he did not by chance notice Ed's hands sliding from their earlier stance in front of his chest down to his waiting lap. Al unconsciously shuddered; he would have been crushed into pieces if the fullmetal chose to favor his impulse than his senses.

"Is it midday already?" Ed asked, fishing his silver watch out in process when he finally noticed that his brother was in no condition to give a decent reply.

"Yes," suddenly Al found his voice. "You often skip lunch and pay heed to nothing else when you're studying so I have to come and fetch you."

The older brother rose from the lavishly tiled floor and stretched his stiff muscles, his automail-ed arm lightly brushing against the tallest stack, which Al looked warily at. Eyeing the monstrous piles with a thoughtful expression, Ed scratched his chin and murmured to his brother, "Should we put these books back to their place?"

"Of course, Nii-san!" Alphonse was only too ready to answer, voice echoing blatant disapproval. As if to emphasize his words, he immediately reached for the nearest heap and started to restore the books to their proper place according to their indexed number. It was when he noticed that some of the books belonged to the highest shelves that not even someone with his height could possibly reach. "Nii-san, did you ask the librarian to get you these books with a ladder?"

Suddenly Edward grinned and before Al could repeat in uncertainty that his brother had missed his question, the blond alchemist had climbed a nearby stack with an agility of the nimblest cat and perched on its summit. Eyes glinting merrily, he looked downward, still grinning. "I hardly need a ladder. Give me those books."

Obediently Alphonse passed them to the blonde. "Have you really finished all these books?"

"I wasn't reading them," Ed answered, voice losing a tad of its earlier nonchalance. "Only looking for something."

Al was too polite to prod the issue further and decided to keep his guessing for himself. His brother would tell him in due time like always if he had thought the time suit –or at least the old Ed would. They had spent another minute in silence, only hands busily working when Al once again initiated a conversation, voice heavy and hesitant, obviously reluctant to lead the topic he was about to discuss. "Nii-san," he gulped as he passed another three books, "after lunch we have to submit our report to the Colonel."

There was a pause while the Fullmetal took his time to shove the books forcefully into an empty space in the shelf. His golden eyes were still refusing to look at his brother when he said quietly. "You do that."

"But Nii-san-"

Suddenly Ed spun around and cut Alphonse's words, eyes blazing in fire. "What do you expect me to-"

-and the stack he was sitting lost its vulnerable balance as the impact, bringing the blond alchemist down right to the hard floor.

"NII-SAN!"

---

The sun was bright.

Too bright in fact. It roasted the face of Central City like a dried meat in the heart of a desert; merciless but still inescapable. The fact that summer was ending did not aid, let along change anything. Autumn and its salubrious breeze were but wistful dreams which became fader in mind as the sun crawled slowly to claim its highest throne, weather developing a higher degree of heat as minutes steadily ticked away.

He was becoming melancholic. And foolish; what kind of colonel he was if he spent hours to daydream instead of working on his documents? Midday barely passed and he had slacked off already. Mentally giving himself a smack square on the head, Roy whirled his chair back to face his desk. For a moment he merely evaluated the thick stack of paper on his desk. While fieldwork was not entirely his cup of tea, paperwork was much worse, especially now that he had experienced being chained to his desk to spend a sleepless night with many unfriendly papers. It was horrendous to find out that papers, despite their obviously lifeless state, could demand for more attention than any of his former girlfriends had.

But Hawkeye was drop dead scary. Roy doubted he would be surprised if suddenly a bullet from the First Lieutenant's gun made a hole on his office door just because she somehow noticed his laid-back state. Instead, it was highly possible that the picture would materialize soon if he did nothing to defeat his indolence.

Releasing a heavy sigh, the Colonel reached for the paper at the top of the stack. A request for an asylum? Was this supposed to be a colonel's work? And after that, a letter which notified him the conveying of a crate of cactus to Northest Town. The third paper was a report that in the past year, the military had saved six drowning cats and... what the hell? Roy could feel his eyebrows twitching. Why did it suddenly make him think that it was a disgraceful waste to be a state alchemist? And what would a little monotonous town like Northest do with a crate of cactus anyway?

Slamming the papers fiercely onto the smooth surface of his desk, he leant back and closed his eyes. He did not like the sun, but he could do nothing to the huge glass window behind his chair. Contrary to common belief due to his title, he had never liked its heat. And now he also hated its glow. It reminded him of bright blond hair.

Oh right, Northest. Now he remembered why the mentioning of the place had bothered him. It was the city where the Fullmetal had –presumably– lost his actual memories and from where a magnificently absurd memory had come to lodge itself in a quarter of the blond alchemist's brain. The first time Roy found out about what was left in his charge's mind, the level of his shock was outstanding, and it was like competing with his disgust to reach the top marks. It had never crossed his mind even just onceto do that to Ed. Hell, he positively wasn't interested in kids half his age.

Unfortunately most of his subordinates were more than willing to believe the Fullmetal –thanks to the guard duo who had been trying to stop Al from storming into his office that night, everybody managed to hear the complete (no matter how fictitious and twisted) version of the story of a colonel raping his underage charge. Too bad Roy wasn't self-conscious enough to suspect that perhaps their faith had grown so rapidly because of his unequaled reputation with girls.

But he certainly didn't rape Edward. He would rather put his life at stake and tried to seduce Hawkeye instead.

A train of knocks disturbed his thought and he prayed it wasn't his first lieutenant coming to ensure the progress of his paperwork –which only three so far he had glanced at. When the gigantic build of Alphonse Elric invaded his line of sight, Roy huffed in relief.

"Colonel, I bring my brother's report," the armor spoke with a clear polite tone.

Brows knitting into one fine line, the Flame Alchemist said in brewing annoyance, "You again? I thought it was your brother who has the title the dog of military."

The answer he got was no less stern, yet carried a tad of desperation in it. "Nii-san still disinclines to meet you in person, Colonel. Please understand his condition for this once."

Roy was so willing to point out that it had been the third time Al representing his brother, but wisely chose to stay quiet about that matter. He had seen many victims of rape before and compared to them, the Fullmetal was as calm as the pristine surface of peaceful ocean –with its rage and storm lay quietly underneath. Roy knew he was expected to understand. And so he did.

After taking the bundle of report from Al's outstretched hand, he quickly dismissed the younger Elric, expecting the other to be as pissed as he was at the situation which none of them could change and soon leave him alone to deal with his anger in peace. It took him one full minute to look up again and find the build of armor still standing resolutely on his place, small white eyes staring straightly to the paper on his hand.

"Colonel," Al began, a flare of hope flashing in that one short title. "Is there any development in the investigation of Nii-san's case?"

To answer seemed very difficult for Roy, but he eventually managed a short explanation, if a bit inadequate. "I have sent a man from the investigation division to go to Northest Town but nothing of importance he has reported."

"Oh."

Had Al could move a muscle of his stiff metal face, the Colonel would have seen a heartbreaking crestfallen expression. Roy studied him for a moment, noticing the straight posture the younger brother still maintained despite the downcast of his eyes, and decided that it would be rather rude to try sending him away once more while he himself was still the accused rapist of his brother.

"Are you sure you have told me everything you know?" It was a cliché procedure when an officer was reluctant to admit his deadlock situation, but Roy could think of nothing else to prove that he was really making an effort to solve the case.

"Yes," the other nodded, there was a small clank of metal as he did so. "We arrived at Northest Town at July 28 and found nothing out of ordinary. Nii-san didn't tell me the details of this mission but he himself was looking rather bored. It was on the third day of our stay there when he disappeared and did not come back to the inn. I waited until about 8 p.m. then decided to search for him. The next thing I knew, I woke up in a dungeon of an old abandoned mansion with Nii-san having a high fever beside me. He kept calling your name, so the first thing in my mind was to bring him to you. We spent a day for the journey here and arrived at Central City that night."

"You said it was pretty early in the morning when you set off to Central City," the Colonel sat back on his chair, eyes looking sharply at Al. "Do you remember anything, anyone, or even the precise time?"

His voice was a bit wistful when he replied, "I felt dizzy, and it was odd because I shouldn't be able to feel that kind of thing anymore. But I saw nobody, as I have stated in my report before. About the time," Al raised his hand and touched the back of his head sheepishly, "I was too distracted, Colonel. There was Nii'san's silver watch, but I didn't give a second thought about it."

The Colonel lowered his eyelids to see clearer into his mind, voice quiet as if speaking to himself. "You arrived here at July 30 night, so you are unconscious for approximately two days."

That sentence made Al feel –for the first time during his cursed days entrapped inside the armor– grateful that he could no longer eat, nor needed any food.

He was still wavering in the irony of all things when suddenly Roy asked again, eyes still shut. "You have never seen this alchemist I ordered the Fullmetal to search?"

"No, not even once."

It was the look the Colonel was presenting before him that convinced Al that he made no mistake in trusting him. The man was still silent, his lips tightening as if he was struggling to say something he was not supposed to. But the words which slipped out of his lips was a short, simple, "You may go." However, Al eventually discovered a moment later, when he reached the doorknob to give it a light press.

"How is your brother?"

The inquiry was soft, almost inaudible, and brought with it an air of odd ambivalence. It froze Al to his spot, but when he turned around to find that the Colonel was so determined not to look at him, his answer was sincere. "Better."

Eyes still resolutely set downcast, Roy listened to the younger Elric's waning footsteps. The report he was trying to read made no sense at all to his malfunctioning brain that even if it was no trait of him to give up so soon, he stood up and walked to the window behind him.

It was a choice to be lamented, a seriously injurious one. A wave of remorse –and oddly, yearn– hit him hard when his dark eyes caught a sight of a blond young man in black attire standing unobtrusively in the cool shade of the colossal headquarter building, eyes looking anywhere else but to his window. It lent a new topic for him to contemplate, that he had not seen the Fullmetal since that night three weeks ago.

"Colonel."

Hawkeye's firm voice put his attention back into the office, but he made no attempt to turn around. In his intent scrutiny to the young alchemist far down below, he could almost imagine seeing his lieutenant sharp eyes roaming at the desk and his untouched paperwork. He waited, sensing another scold coming.

But none came.

The Fullmetal leant back to the grey wall behind him and Roy's eyes barely missed the uneasy expression on the blonde's countenance. The boy folded his arms and dared himself to glance at the headquarters' entrance, but stubbornly not to the window above. A slight pang appeared in the Colonel's stomach at the sight and almost involuntarily, an incredibly weird question left his mouth.

"Do you think I really did it?"

He was expecting Hawkeye to give a straight answer –a 'no', or even a 'yes'– but she merely shot another query, forcing him to think and decide for himself. "What do you think, Sir?"

As he witnessed Edward's face brightening at the coming of his brother, a warm smile gracing his lips, he knew what to answer.

"No, I didn't do it."

---

Until the next chapter