Oh, Joyous Jingled Bells
By Kirjava Deamon
HOLIDAY PRESENT AND DEDICATED TO: Chelsea, Shannon and Myk!
My first attempt at humor.
I don't own Holes.
Oh, joy. Christmas time at Camp Green Lake; my second time staying for the holidays. Most kids I know only stay once or twice if you're like X-ray. ("Hey man, no need to drag me into you 'doc-u-men-tary', Magnet!") Please excuse the terrible actors. ("I heard that.") If you're wondering what I'm doing and are sitting at home in front of you computers either a) out of boredom or b) you actually want to see this and are pondering, I, Magnet NOT José, am making a 'Christmas in 90 degrees at Camp Green Lake'. Enjoy. ("Why's the technical wire sparking? GET IT AWAY OR YOU WILL PAY, MAGNET!") Umm, heh?
Once again, ignore those….uh, them. They are just, umm, the puppets used to bring children's entertainment. ("What the heck did you just say?!")
Ever since The Warden, Lou-Anne Walker and her 'employees' were arrested, The New Warden, real name unknown, has taken over. He also did an interesting and dreadful change-one side of Camp Green Lake is girls. Now this can be good for many, take Squid for example, he always has to run away from screaming fan-girls. Twitch on the other hand is happy with one named Lee-Marie. ("Wait, didn't Chelsea say she died in a car wreck?") No, not yet at least.
Here we are approaching the Wreck Room, stay away from the scratched up pool table, that's boys only. To the viewers who may wish to join our "Happy Little Family" at Camp Green Lake, following orders and rules it the safest thing. The inhabitance of Camp Green Lake are very shrewd and not very merciful to those who break the unspoken rules. As you can see, one unspoken rule is that closet over to the side where completely random items are held is strictly off limits to anyone but 'couples'. We open it now; only to see Ryan and Tori in the middle of courting…we shall leave them alone to "behave". ("Hey, I'm on camera, hi Mom!")
Now we shall visit the forsaken zone—the Pool Table and Bowling Alley, two very almost religious places for the campers of Camp Green Lake. Right not, Myk, one of the newest girl-campers, is carving bleeped out words into the once smooth, green velvet cover of the Pool Table with some C-tent boys trying to impress some of the blonder girls with their mad "skills" of pool, though I am better than them at impressing girls. Hence my Spanish accent, oh yeah. ("I heard that, Magnet; you betta watch out man").
Suddenly, the ground begins to shake; everyone's running outside to the digging site. We follow the trample of migrating teens to their destination. What we see is a table set up with lunch, but the reason so many traveled the long, half-mile is because of one thing…Christmas feast! They begin to gorge on the pitiful meal, but The New Warden hands out jingle bells. Quickly, two males (Squid and Zigzag) begin to fight over what place in line they have, using the jingle bells as a primitive weapon. When a group of girls begin to sing a rather terrible and not-G-rated parody to Jingle Bells, they stop and join in. ("It burns my ears to hear those people SING!") I agree, so the sound on the camera is suddenly mute.
Hehe…whoa! Seems like these specimens don't like being video taped…as their Christmas carols suddenly turn very, well, bloody to me. ("Oh silent niiiight, oh holy niiiiight….wait, what does Magnet have?! A VIDEO CAMERA?!") Um… ("GET HIM, HE'S WITH THE FBI SPYING ON US") as you can see, Zigzag gets a bit 'edgy' at time.
Holy Irby! Owch, these animals are so violent!
And, owch, that's Christmas at Camp Green Lake filmed by Magnet NOT José, OWCH!, stay tuned in for next week's show. ("You're doing this again; I don't think so, girlfriend.")
La fin.