Rainwater
Chapter 11: Invitations
Rating: R for sexual situations and suggestions, adult topics and language.
WitchyPrincess

Invitations

I spent my whole life living for other people, never living much at all. When my friends said "jump" I was the first to ask "how high". I was always aiming to please, led by my mother's hand I sheltered myself under my father's arms.

He was always the one that chased the bad guys away. That handled my problems and picked me up when I cried. And she was always the one that told me what to do. Always told me where to go, how to act, and what to say. I never disobeyed, I never questioned or ventured to find out for myself how I wanted to do things.

Until finally I had to leave. Finally I had to live for me, to find me. And no one understands that. Everything I've done, prior to New York, I've done for everyone else. To please everyone else. For the first time I did something selfishly, solely for me, and it seems to have turned everyone's world upside down.

I look in the mirror and I don't recognize me anymore. I'm not the same girl I used to be.

I've always tried my best with everything I've done. A perfectionist despite myself, always feeling my best was never good enough; living in the shadow of blind illusion, some fictional picture my parents and friends had of who I am. Trying my best to be the girl in that photograph. Someone who laughs.

But sometimes the plastic stretched too thin. It's amazing that I'm not a mess of jumbled glass, I'm so very fragile in my form. It's amazing that I haven't already broken, I definitely wasn't built to last.

–Bra Briefs
#######

Bra drew her feet up as she stared out the window. This had been the worst week of her life, and now her mother was only making it more gruesome.

Why couldn't either of her parents simply mind their own business? She hated the way her father always seemed to know everything that she didn't want him to, and she hated the way he shared it with her mother. Apparently neither of them believe she was just simply in a bad mood. Neither of them believed it was a 'feminine' thing. But, then again, she knew who her parents were. They knew better than to believe things like that when they weren't true.

She hated that she was so upset about something so trivial. And she hated that she couldn't fix this.

Why was he back with Paris already? Why had they reconciled so quickly? Bra had thought she'd have at least two weeks to work Goten. But no, now he was back with 'the love of his life' and she didn't stand a chance in hell. Pan had been right all along, and Bra hated to be wrong. Especially about important things. And this was the most important of all.

Now she didn't want to do anything, she didn't even want to leave her room. She couldn't even think of training. And for what? For some guy that had never looked twice at her in that way anyway. She knew, all along she knew, that she was fighting a losing battle. But she had been willing to fight it anyway.

Where was that girl, that spirit, now? She had to get her back, she wasn't willing to give up yet. She refused to sit back and let Paris have the upper hand. This was war and, dammit, they were both going to end up with some scars if Bra had put everything she had into it.

No, this wasn't over yet. Her mother had made sure of that and, Bra was sure, she had done it on purpose. For some reason, Bulma was now aware of the affection Bra held for Goten. And she was aware of many more things, that Bra could only guess at, about Trunks. Her mother was scheming, she could see it in her eyes. Bra only hoped it worked in her favor. This get-together certainly seemed to promise just that.#######

Pan sighed as she poured her mother a cup of coffee. She wasn't really in the mood for this, but then, to be fair, she hadn't been in the mood for anything lately. She'd been in a bad mood for nearly the entire week since she'd left Trunks' office.

Now was different though. This was about more than just her bad mood in general; this was about principle. If her father wanted to see her then he should be the one sitting across from her on her worn-out sofa, not Videl. She wasn't going to come crawling back to her father any more than he was going to do the same for her. For all she cared, they could hold out in this silent war forever.

But she'd been incredibly lonely these last few days. She couldn't go over to her parents' house and bother her father to spar. She couldn't go shopping with her mother, or sit in the kitchen and annoy ChiChi and her mother. She couldn't do anything that involved seeing her father because that would be like saying he was right. And she certainly couldn't see Trunks.

Goten was back with Paris, she'd heard it from his own mouth, and so he had no time for her. As per usual. She no longer had a boyfriend, not that she was sorry about that at this particular moment - all boys were scum - but at least that would be some companionship. Someone to talk to.

Besides work, which consisted of her never leaving her office anyway for fear of seeing Trunks, she hadn't had any human companionship at all. Not really.

The only person she could think of that might even want to see her was Bra. And Bra had cancelled their training, not that she wanted to go to Trunks' house and do anything that might involve seeing him. She truly never wanted to see him again. But the fact of the matter was, she was going out of her mind in this small apartment and there was only so much one could do alone without feeling foolish doing it. She'd already crossed the line.

Besides, she couldn't stand herself lately. She hated her thoughts when she was alone. They all revolved around Trunks. And how she might, maybe, miss him a little. Well, miss wasn't exactly the word, but she certainly couldn't stop thinking about him. And his hands. And, Dende, his lips.

She shifted in her seat as her mother gave her an odd, questioning look, with the tilt of her head. "Are you alright, sweetheart? You look..."

"Uncomfortable?" Pan volunteered, trying to get her point across. She didn't want to talk about her father. Her mother sighed, shaking her head.

"No, different. You look different." Pan shifted again.

"How so?" She asked, not being able to resist. Her mother seemed to think for a long time before she found the words to respond. And when she did her explanation was as feeble as her observation.

"I don't really know what it is, Pan. But...You just seem..." She narrowed her eyes, leaning closer and studying her daughter with perceptive sea-blue eyes. "Are you sure you're feeling okay? You look like...honey, you look like someone's stolen your happiness. Are you sure you don't want to see your father today?"

"Positive. If dad wants to see me then he can come over here himself, there's no need for a middle man in this mom. He obviously doesn't want to or he'd be the one here and not you. You don't have to do this because you think it's the best thing for everyone. It'd be better if you minded your own business."

"Honey, did something happen that you want to talk about?" Her mother asked with concern, not bothering to pay attention to Pan's long response to her previous question. Her voice was still filled with worry and she was still staring at Pan as though she'd never seen her before.

"No! Heavens, what's wrong with you? I can't simply look a little tired without you getting all nosy and ready to swing into action, gah. Listen, mom, you're not a super-hero anymore, you know. I don't need you regulating my life."

"I was only asking if you wanted to talk, Pan," Her voice sounded clipped now as she stood up, setting the coffee down on the table, un-sipped. "A simple 'no' would have sufficed. And I'm only here because your father and I are taking a vacation. We're going to Spain for two weeks and I didn't want him to mope around the entire time and brood. But if you're going to be that way then maybe it'd be better if he doesn't see you." She straightened her shirt and headed for the door.

Guilt took over as Pan walked behind her mother, chewing on her lip and wishing she had kept her mouth shut. "Mom, I'm sorry. I've just had a rough week and, I guess, I was looking for someone to take it out on. I didn't mean anything by it. And," Here she sighed, drawing in a deep breath. "I guess I'll see dad before you guys leave. But I'm not going to apologize or anything like that. And I'm only doing it because you asked, no other reason." There was warning in her voice as she said that part, a slight glare in her expression.

"You don't have to do me any favors, Pan." Her mother muttered, sighing softly. "I just hope you start to feel better, Pan, because you really don't look too well. Maybe you should get out of the house for a while, call up a friend?"

"Actually I was going to go to the park for a little while and watch the ducks." She wasn't really, she didn't want to go outside and face the world. But she did want her mother out of her apartment.

"Good, you look paler than I've ever seen you before." Pan sighed as her mother opened the door and waved goodbye. "I'll be looking forward to seeing you tomorrow." Videl called as the door closed behind her. Pan muttered as she went to pick up the coffee cup, hating the way she felt so manipulated.

#######

There was no way in hell Pan was going to go. Was Bulma insane? Who did she think she was, ordering something like this? Requesting that Pan make every arrangement necessary to attend this two-day, no-reason trip with only six people invited, herself included.

If Bulma had even the slimmest hope in hell that Pan was going to show, she would have lied about the guest list. She would have at least embellished a little. Bulma, of all people, should know Pan would never want to do this.

But then again, it had been Bulma who was absolutely certain Pan was madly in love with her son when, actually, it was the direct opposite.

Pan couldn't hate him more if he'd killed someone she loved. In a way he had; he'd killed her. There had been very few people she'd loved more than herself, now she couldn't even stand her reflection. She detested the mere thought of him.

She got off her sofa as the buzzer sounded, praying to every spirit and higher being that she could think of, that it was Bulma-San herself, insisting that Pan come. She'd throw the woman out without a second thought.

Nothing, no one, could drag her onto an island with these people. And there was nothing, no one, that could make her change her mind. Fortunately, as she pressed the buzzer to ask who it was, it was only Goten on his way up to see her. Thank goodness for that small blessing.

The only problem was, when he got there and she saw him, he was holding up the same dumb ass invitation that she'd just bowled up and thrown into her trash can. Whatever his reason for showing up with that invitation, she resolved, would not get her to change her mind. She was not going to go.

#######

Forty-five minutes of persuasion, coxing, teasing, and shameless begging later, she was sighing and throwing her hands up into the air in frustration.

"What do you want from me? Why is this so important to you?"

"Why are you so adamant against this, Pan?" He countered. "There's no reason for you not to want to go."

"Answer my question first." She demanded stubbornly, shifting with extreme discomfort at the possibility of having to explain. Goten would go completely crazy if he knew the truth, if he knew what happened between her and Trunks. She was positive he'd kill someone. She just didn't know if it'd be her or Trunks and that was the only thing keeping her from spilling it all.

"Bulma came to me and made it pretty clear that I'm not to refuse this invitation. Call me a coward if you want to but that woman can be intimidating when she's trying to be. I couldn't say no to her. Now I have to go Pan, and if I have to go then someone's got to suffer this with me. Please, don't make me do this alone."

So that answered one question. No, Bulma wasn't insane, she was sneaky and manipulative, but not insane. She knew what she was doing. She went to Goten because she knew Pan would refuse her if she tried it. She used Goten to get to Pan and now Pan was stuck. She couldn't say no to her uncle, not just because she couldn't say no to him - though that was certainly part of it - but because if she did she'd have to explain why. And there was nothing, short of the truth, that he'd believe as good enough reason why she wouldn't go.

She could say she hated Trunks, he'd simply say she didn't really and she wouldn't have to see him anyway. Besides, she'd grown up with him and he thought she was crazy about Trunks, at least as a friend. She always had been. She could try saying she hated Trunks, Marron, Ubuu, and Bra but that wouldn't work either. He'd tell her that she could spend all her time with him, and that he'd enjoy it just as much as she would - not at all. She couldn't say no. There was no way out of this.

She really hated everything that involved the 'Briefs' name now. This was not fair. She absolutely could not spend a weekend at a resort with only Marron, Ubuu, Goten, Bra, and Trunks and not see Trunks at all. Not talk to Trunks at all. She didn't even know what kind of arrangements Bulma had made; for all she knew, her and Trunks could be sharing the same room. At this point, she wouldn't put it past the woman. And, considering Bulma's meddling record, she'd be smart not to.

It would be just like Bulma to come up with some horrible plan, with the pretense of 'helping out'. She never did help. Every time she stuck her nose into something she only ever made it worse, and this was no exception. Bulma thought she was doing what was best, helping Pan along with the 'plan', but she was not. There was no plan any longer and if Bulma knew the whole story she'd understand why not. As it was though, Pan would just have to suffer through this with as much grace as she could muster. She had to face her demons sometimes.

Besides, it wasn't like Trunks was going to actually insist on spending any time with her. They both felt the same way about each other. The little incident the other day needed to be dead and buried; they were both going to try their best, she was sure, and pretend like it never happened. And, in the meantime, they were going to avoid each other like the plague. There was no way, she thought, that he was going to try and make things better between them. There was no reconciling something this horrible.

#######

Bra put the last of her things in her second bag and zipped it up. She only needed three days worth of clothes but she still found a way to fill up two different bags along with a make-up bag. She almost laughed at her own self, thinking about how some things didn't change after all. She'd always be her mother's daughter, despite herself.

There was no time, however, to dwell on the particulars. Marron would be here in a few minutes and then they would be off. Off to meet the others at the airport, just as her mother had arranged.

She was surprised that no one had called to cancel. But then, she knew Bulma had put a lot of pressure on everybody so that they wouldn't turn her down. What she'd done though, Bra couldn't help but think, was not exactly the best of things.

She'd sent invitations to Goten, Pan, Marron, and Ubuu, telling each of them that she'd paid for them to spend a week-end on the beaches of the Carribean Islands. Who could refuse something like that anyway? Bulma's only request was that they each spend time together, like they used to as children, and not invite anyone else to come along. Just the six of them, she'd said, like old times.

But Bra knew she was up to something. There was more to this than met the eye. And she had a sneaking suspicion it had to do with her and Goten - thus the 'no outside company' rule. Paris, therefore, could not come. And yet, Bra couldn't shake the feeling that it also had to do with Trunks. Or maybe, maybe it had to do with only Trunks and not her at all.

Ever since Bra had blown up at him during dinner last week, they'd been avoiding eye contact with each other. She'd done her best to silently apologize to him, but he was worse than ever before. It scared her, watching her brother spiral into a wave of emotions that she didn't understand and wasn't sure if she was to blame for or not. She certainly hoped not, she'd never forgive herself if she was the reason he was so upset, but she had no other explanation.

So maybe this was what Bulma thought Trunks needed, in order to lift his spirits. Surely her mother had noticed how upset Trunks was lately, everyone noticed. He looked like someone had stolen his best friend, or, and maybe more accurately, he looked like he'd stolen someone else's best friend and now he felt guilty about it.

She sent a silent prayer up to Dende, for her brother, in hopes that he worked things out this week-end. For everybody's sanity.

To be continued...