THE PRINCESS BRIDE

As preformed by the cast of 'Harry Potter'

Directed by Tokemi (Who does not in any way, shape, or form, own, or claim to own 'Harry Potter' or 'The Princess Bride')

Part III

The water lapped at the sides of a small vessel sailing the strait between the countries of Guilder and Florence. The crew was diminutive, even for the boats' size- there were only four people on the ship, and only three in a state of consciousness. A thin man who looked to be from the country of Slytherin sat quietly, lost in thought. A wild looking giant easily dwarfed the cabin to that he leaned against, and a green-eyed man stood at the helm. The fourth passenger on the voyage was a young woman in rich (if rather practical) clothes, and a circlet in her (bushy) hair. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was slightly open in sleep revealing perfectly white (if bucked) teeth. She was lain out, completely uncon—

"I know you're awake, Princess. You can stop pretending." Observed the Slytherin coldly. Princess Hermione sat up, looking rather indignant at being caught out. Zabini smirked at her, continuing, "It doesn't really matter anyway. We'll be a the Cliffs of Insanity by dawn, and there you will die."

Hermione did not care much (or at all in fact) for her fiancé, but even as a peasant she'd heard of his abilities in hunting and tracking. Giving her captor a rather bossy look—she wasn't as far as 'haughty glances' in her princess lessons yet— she began to enlighten him. "Prince Draco can hunt anything and anyone, anywhere, he's never failed to meet a challenge, and when he catches you, and he will catch you, you will all be preparing for your dawn execution!" Her cheeks were pink with fervor. At least there was one useful thing about the prince— though if he weren't forcing her to marry him she wouldn't be in this bloody mess in the first place.

A knife at her throat rather quelled her confident manner. "Of all the necks on this boat," Zabini hissed, "yours would be the one I'd be worrying about… And why one earth do you keep looking back you fool! You're at the helm, you're guiding the ship, you don't need to be gawping at the back of the boat!" he whirled on the swordsman.

Harry blinked. "I'm looking to see if anyone's following us."

"Following us? Inconceivable! As I just finished explaining to the Princess, we are nearly through with this business, so you can relax and leave the thinking to m-"

"Are you sure no one's following us?" Harry's inquiry had the terrific effect of causing the entire left side of Zabini's face to spasm madly.

"OF COURSE NOT!" he shrieked, "No one in Guilder knows what we've done, and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast! My plan is flawless, utterly perfect, and there is no chance of anything going wrong! Why would you even think something like that?"

Giving his exclamation-point spouting boss a sullen glance, Harry snapped, "Oh, no reason, just because I looked back and something was there!"

"What!" Every head on the ship was suddenly turned to the end of the ship, as if blown in that direction by a powerful wind. The clouds shifted and a shaft of moonlight revealed that there was indeed another ship behind them. "…It's no one. Just a pass-byer, a fisherman probably." Muttered Zambini feebly.

"Yeah." Chimed in the giant, looking effortlessly over the cabin roof. "Ou' for a pleasure cruise. A' nigh'…in eel infested waters…wi' black sails." In the silence that met this infallible logic the splash of Hermione diving into the salty water was easily heard.

Zabini reacted swiftly. "Quick, go in after her!" her ordered his hirelings.

Harry shook his head. "I never learned how to swim."

"I on'y dog-paddle" Hagrid explained, demonstrating with his hands. Zabini scowled. He himself was too weak to face the current and bring the wench back. Gathering his courage he stepped to the edge of the boat, and then taking his knife he made a small slit in the palm. The Slytherin allowed the blood to pool in his cupped hand before flinging it out in the Princess's direction. This act was quickly followed by an eerie shrieking sound.(1)

Hermione came to a halt, treading the black water. Zabini called down to her. "Do you know what that sound is? It's the Shrieking Eels…they're known for feeding on human flesh, drawn by the scent of fresh blood. Swim back to ship, and we can at least offer you a painless death. I doubt the eels will be as pleasant."

The princess hesitated; the shrieking grew louder and an eel suddenly lunged from the water next to her. The usually stout girl could not help letting out a scream of terror as the eel—

"The eels don't get her. She doesn't die now."

OoOoO

"What?" Sirius blinked, sounding almost surprised at finding himself in his bed with old Great-Uncle Alphard rather than in the middle of a sea-full of Shreiking Eels.

"Hermione doesn't get eaten by the eels. You were looking worried, I thought I should explain." Said the old man.

"I wasn't worried!" the boy howled indignantly.

"…"

"I wasn't."

"…Of course, now where were we—

"'Do you know what that sound is Princess?' Zabini called down"

"No, we're past that part!" cried the boy.

Uncle Alphard raised an eyebrow. "You're looking rather upset. Do you want me to stop reading?"

"No…You can keep reading. Since you came all the way out here and stuff." Sirius said hastily.

"Okay," His uncle conceded, "Here we are, Hermione is in the water, the eel lunges, she screams…

OoOoO

A heavy lifesaver slammed into the eel, knocking it off course. Hermione, devoid of all other options, grabbed onto the ring as Hagrid pulled her back into the boat where Zabini (his bloody hand wrapped) bound her wrists painfully tight. "Well," He snarled, "do you think that you proved anything? That you are brave?"

Princess Hermione, dripping wet and shivering, looked the Slytherin straight in the eye. "Only compared to some." Zabini raised his hand to strike her, but was interrupted by the swordsman.

"I think he's getting closer." Harry observed, pointing to the mysterious boat, which was now undoubtedly following them. Hagrid cast a rather relieved, if unsettled, glance at young captive.

"He's no concern of yours." Zabini spat. "Sail on."

OoOoO

At the helm of the black-sailed ship was a black-dressed man, with a black mask covering his face. The ties to his mask whipped with the wind as the boat flew along. He gazed steadily at the horizon and the conspirators' ship with a determined frown as he sailed onward.

OoOoO

1) Anyone who thinks this sounds rather…inconceivable… has obviously never heard of the Shreiking Eels extraordinary sense of smell. Yeah, that's it.

Reviews for the second chapter were put up with the re-done second chapter.

A/N: Whee! My first chapter in…forever. Sorry, real life kind of interrupted. But I hope to have a steady update going again. Yay. Kinda short tho'. I know this seems to be following the movie really closely, but by the time R—The Dread Pirate Grindelwald shows up, it should be taking on a definite character.