Disclaimer: If you haven't yet figured it out... it's not mine.

A/N: So very sorry for the extremily long wait. This past year has been one of great change and personal difficulty. I will try my hardest to post on a regular basis and I cannot express how much your continued support and encouragement has blessed me. Thank you so much, my readers…

What if the Potters protected their son in such a way that no one even knew he was alive?

Spoilers: I am not sure. . . This is the first time I have done this. Don't get angry if I let things lip out in the wrong order.

Special Thanks To: jbfritz, spezlee, gaul1, nalini213, Silver-Entrantress-Elf, Quills 'N Ink, ninariddletales, tasthedevilman, bird-of-mpreg, Spirit and Essence, tanydwr, moonlight dream, mactunes, natbag, Padfut's-Moon, Prd2bAmerican18, Lightning Rain, doro, cataclysmic, Ms.Padfoot, Flurries-owl, Night-Owl123, solaris isa, Hermione Green, solar, solar1, Insomniac Boarder, fiddy, pompompom,Geminia -- you guys and your encouraging words helped inspire me to continue… Thank you so much.

Short Fat Fag - thanks for the suggestion about spacing… I think I fixed it.

Nande - thanks for reading my story. Your review is lacing and obviously I have a life and I spend part of it reading and writing.

Marquerida - Hope this answers some of your questions.

Fairy of Irrelevance - Benjamin is the owner and Headmaster of a school that combines teaching muggle borns about the magical world as well as teaching magical students about the muggle world. It is also an orphanage for children from the wizarding world. Basically it is a place where children are cherished, valued and taught without regard to blood purity, parentage, or species. It is the anti-thesis of what Voldemort stood for. Harry's mother, Lily, saw Ben as a brother because her parents took him in when she was only 3 years old. Ben was also mentioned as Lily and James cast their protection spell. I hope this clears things up a bit.

BehindGreenEyes - Sorry it has taken so long. I hope everything worked out for you on Fors Fortis

FabioandtheDuck - Chapter 4 was designed to make Ben a real and believable character

Glyph - I chose Los Gatos after doing research online. I wanted to use a real place as that gave me something to work with… I wanted it to have a cool name, and what is more magical than 'The Cat'? It also had to be somewhat close to a large city… Los Gatos was perfect. I will be working in some local events as well as some Bay Area landmarks. Sorry about the tenses in ch.4... I wanted to put you "in the story" so to speak. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

The Phoenix Rises

By TexasJeanette

Chapter 5: Letters to the Dead - The Early Years

November 3, 1981

Dearest Lily and James,

It worked! And though I am very happy that young Harry has arrived safely, my heart weeps at your loss. I shall miss you my dear sister. I am still amazed that you were both able to create and implement such an incredible plan. Just in time too, it seems.

Harry arrived scared and crying. I held and comforted him for hours. Though, I must admit that I received as much comfort as I gave. Having him in my arms filled me with a peace I don't think I would have achieved otherwise. Our family is now gone. Petunia is still alive, but as she no longer considers me family I feel I must return the favor.

My staff doctors examined Harry and except for an odd lightening bolt shaped scar on his forehead, he is unharmed. The medi-wizard believes it to be a curse scar as it has residues of dark magic in it. He has seen nothing like it before.

Harry will be placed with the general population. Due to the heightened activity of Voldemort and his Death Eaters we have several babies in our nursery now. Most of them are squibs and muggle-borns. Since Voldemort limited his assassinations to Europe, mainly Britain, the Ministry was able to place the 'pure-blood' orphans with Magical families.

Speaking of Voldemort, he appears to be gone. There is much debate over whether he is dead or simply wounded, but I will be operating under the premise that he will return one day. I will write in this journal twice each year. On young Harry's birthday and at the beginning of each new year. I promise to love and teach him to the best of my abilities.

I hope that you both find the peace you deserve and the happiness that has been missing from our lives for so long. God Bless you both on your journey through the 'next great adventure.'

Love, Your Brother Ben

January 1, 1982

Harry has settled pretty well into his new home. He was plagued with nightmares for a while and had to be held through the night to get him to sleep. He has mostly calmed. He has some stuffed animals that he clings to, a black dog, a wolf and a stag… he calls them pa'foo, mooey, and papa prongs. They and his necklace are his constant companions.

I have several counselors on staff. They specialize in helping children through traumatic experiences. With their support I have initiated a plan to help them feel like they are part of the family here. Upon each orphan's arrival all information that can possibly be gathered on each child's family is collected and sealed. The children here have no last name.

In school no child shall use their last name in any official capacity, though they are welcome to share what they choose to with their friends. Upon each child's tenth birthday, I will sit with them and share all we know. This gives each child a year to become familiar with their family's history and legacy and also serves as a developmental milestone. It will become a tradition, a family tradition here that will hopefully help ease them into the world at large.

Each child will be sent to the magic school they would have most likely attended were they still living with their family. This will enable them to meet and connect with people who may know of their family, as well as give them not one but two separate places they may feel they fit in. All children are welcome to return here during holidays and each summer they will all come 'home'.

Harry has stolen the heart of all of his caregivers. He is coming out of his shell and has begun interacting with the other toddlers. You would be so proud. He comforts the wee ones when they cry and loves to dance. It warms my heart when he laughs. I am Unca Ben to all my little ones… at least until they enter primary school… then I am Headmaster Docherty during school hours.

James, he has your hair and mischievousness. Lily, he has your eyes and your heart.

With Love, Your Brother Ben

July 31, 1982

He is two today!!! He blew out his candles… with the help of about 12 kids and 8 adults… seems he wanted to share his wish with us all. He then 'served' fistfuls of chocolate cake to all present… and if we ended up wearing more than we ate… well that is just the fun of Birthday parties.

He has bonded well with the other babies and is definitely a natural leader. He is not bossy but he watches… and when someone is unhappy, or brooding… which is a rather common occurrence given that they are all missing their parents and families… he does his best to make them smile…

He has even shared his 'family' of pets with the ones who are especially hard to comfort. Your baby boy is a joy to love. Until next year…

January 1, 1983

Harry did magic!!!! Yes, your little baby boy has had his first burst of accidental magic. On their way outside one of the other toddlers, a young man named Patrick, was pushed down the stairs. Harry screamed 'NO!' and young Patrick bounced down and was not hurt. Harry was drained and cranky. He was scared that his 'brover was hurted', but was reassured when a staff member carried young Patrick back up and Harry heard him yelling, "Again! Again!"

It took a bit of work, but we finally got them to understand that the stairs were not playthings and that Patrick could have been very hurt… but that Harry's magic 'saved' him. Harry was sad that he didn't know what he did, but was cheered when Patrick kissed his cheek and declared that, " 'arry is da bestest brover ever!"

There are a total of 14 toddlers in my nursery now. 8 boys and 6 girls.

Alexander - 4 years old
Amelia - 2 years old
Cassandra - 1 year old
Chloe - 2 years old
Daniel - 3 years old
Emily - 2 years old
Harry - 2 years old (though really 2 ½)
Ishmael - 4 years old
Joshua - 3 years old
Kayla - 3 years old
Noah - 2 years old
Patrick - 3 years old
Sierra - 2 years old
Taylor - 4 years old

Just thought you might want to know who Harry is growing up with. Talk at ya on his birthday…

July 31, 1983

Three years old today! I wish I could say that it has been a happy birthday… but alas, it has not. Harry has had a very rough few months. You see when one of our children reaches 5 years old, he or she is recognized as a 'big kid' and moved from the nursery to the Primary dorms. Because our kids have all had very traumatic lives, it is very important that there are routines and milestones in their lives.

Our schedules are always the same Monday through Friday and vary only for weekends and holidays. This way the children learn that they can depend on the stability and consistency of their lives here. Milestones are also important. Without the benefits of 'family' traditions we have created our own. I mentioned the naming ceremony to you earlier… but we have a few others.

Babies become 'big kids' at the age of 5 and move into our Primary Dorms. They share a single dorm with other children for the next 3 years. Boys and Girls share one very large room, though the girls are on one side and the boys on the other. On their 8th birthday, the children move into a smaller dorm that is NOT co-ed. They stay here for the next 2 years. They are no longer 'big kids' but are instead referred to as a young master or young mistress. Finally on their 10th birthday they have their naming ceremony and are gifted with their own bedroom. This bedroom will remain theirs until they are of 18 years of age. This allows them the opportunity to have sleep-overs with their friends and experience a bit more independence. Since many of them will be leaving for boarding school the following year, it allows a gradual withdrawal from the communal life they have been living and will hopefully ease their way into the stage of their lives.

Alexander and Ishmael have both turned 5 this year and both Amelia and Taylor will be turning 5 soon. Harry has had a hard time dealing with this new 'loss'. He has become very clingy and easily upset. He is afraid that we will all 'go way in green'. His memory of your death is bathed in the green light of the killing curse, I'm afraid.

Since the 'big kids' are able to visit the nursery and do come and play, especially on the weekends and holidays most children have dealt with the change reasonably well. I only hope that with continued visits from his 'brovers and sissers' that Harry will learn that gone does mean dead and that not everyone who leaves fails to return. It has been especially hard explaining the absence of Sirius and Remus. Harry remembers his uncles and when I tell him that they are not dead he wants to know what he did that was so bad they don't want to come and visit. I keep telling him that they would if they could but they don't know where he is, but that some day he can go see them.

It is enough for now. I hope that he accepts all that he is when the time comes.

On a sadder note, despite my best efforts Sirius has been blamed for your betrayal and sentenced to Azkaban. I sent your letters to the Ministry, per your instructions… I even offered to testify at his trial… unfortunately, the Ministry in its infinite wisdom did not see fit to grant Sirius a trial. I have no influence because of my status as a squib. I swear the British Ministry of Magic does more to encourage distance, prejudice, and elitism than I think even Voldemort did… mainly because they are far more trusted. I can do no more for him without risking the exposure of young Harry… so I will wait and hope that Sirius will forgive me when the time comes to reveal all that we have kept hidden.

Until next year my beloved brother and sister…

January 1, 1984

Happy New Year!!!

I read over my sad note from July and am happy to report that Harry is doing very well. He had a fit when Amelia 'left', but with many visits and the understanding that he too would one day be a 'big kid' he was able to happily celebrate young Taylor's fifth birthday a couple of weeks ago. Harry now brags that he knows four big kids and that he will be a big kid soon. He also encourages Joshua, Kayla, Patrick, and Daniel to practice being a 'big kid' so they will be all ready when they move on their birthdays.

It is really amazing to see just how much influence he has on others. When he is sad and withdrawn the other children worry over him and become scared and skittish. When he is happy and excited the kids rally around him. Now all the young ones are eagerly looking forward to their 'big kid' day.

Love ya both, Ben

July 31, 1984

Dear Lily and James,

Harry turned 4 today. He had an Olympic birthday. The summer Olympics are in Los Angeles, California this year. The older children have been following the events avidly and their excitement has trickled down to the nursery. Harry carried his torch that had been carried by each child until he lit the fire. It was all magical of course… the kids got a kick because Harry's favorite color is purple… so the fire was purple… as was the cake, the ice cream and all the decorations. Every year the children make presents for each other so Harry was given some lovingly created drawings and his brothers and sisters that have left the nursery worked together to make Harry a purple Quidditch set. The little ones are not allowed to fly, of course… You would have my head if I let him get on a broom at this age…

His new Quidditch set is designed to be played on the ground. The kids made him a small snitch, Quaffle, and two Bludgers. They had their teachers charm the items. The purple snitch flies around the room never going higher than four feet. The Bludgers and the beaters as well as the Quaffle are all made out of different shades of purple faux fur. Basically it is a stuffed toy that plays back. Harry is definitely James' son, he is a Quidditch fanatic. As much as any four year old can be. His favorite team is the Seattle Sea Monsters… because their team color is … yep, you guessed it, purple!

Harry did magic again… this time it was not quite accidental… I mean, he meant to do it… he is not sure how he did it, but he wanted a puppy… a purple puppy. He wanted it so much that he 'magicked' it purple. He was quite tired afterwards… and was very disappointed when the puppy had to be turned back to its normal color of brown. The puppy was a pet brought for a visit by one of the staff… unfortunately she is a muggle and could not keep a purple puppy. Though Harry was sad that the puppy could not stay purple, he was quick to give his blessing when he realized that the puppy could not go home if it was purple.

Understanding, intelligent, and powerful. What a boy. I sound like a proud papa… I feel like one too. Though I love all of my charges, I admit… at least to myself… that Harry holds a very special place in my heart. I try to hide my special love for Harry so as to not raise suspicions… it works, mostly. Whatever extra seeps through is easily attributed to the fact that Harry has just about everyone wrapped around his little fingers. I only hope that he remains the sweet little boy he is when he is introduced to the general population next year. Some of the older kids are not as easily accepting of things soft and cute… since they have a greater memory of what has happened to them in the past… but listen to me, trying to borrow trouble before its time…

Love, Ben

January 1, 1985

Well, this was Harry's last Christmas in the nursery. Oh, he will be able to come and visit, of course… but it will be different for him next year. Harry knew this. It seems that he has cherished his time as a baby since his birthday. He has occasionally requested a bottle… and has even asked to sleep in a crib. He plays with the baby toys and talks baby talk sometimes.

I was worried at first… I thought he was regressing, but I sat down with him and asked him why he was acting so differently. He looked at me and smiled as he explained, "Soon I'm not gonna be a baby anymore. I will be a big kid… so I am making baby memries… I don wanna foget when I'm all growed up!"

All in all, a very wise child. When we, we being the staff and myself, heard him… we all told him it was a great idea. We now believe that we have a new tradition… year 4 is the year of the baby… Harry said that he wasn't really a baby anymore, but he wasn't really a big kid yet… and that when he really was a baby he didn't know how fun it was to just be a baby… so now, as the children get closer to their 'big' day… they regress to fully appreciate be allowed to just be babies. It's enough to make me cry.

Harry and Emily… whose birthdays are next… are the ones who are the most babyish. They even have the other little ones taking care of them… Harry says its because he will be back to take care of all of them once he's a big kid.

Happy New Year my dear family, Love, Ben