Richard-Raven-Croft: Well I did take an introduction course to physiology but other then that I guess it's just a talent I never really knew I had.
Xmenfan: Well here you are, and you'll she what she thinks of them and a few others too. BTW what's that IMO you put in the review mean?
The Uncanny R-Man: Thanks, and yeah I know what you mean.
slickboy444: Yeah I always liked her too, and I wanted something to focus on her.
Ldypebsaby: My thoughts exactly, which is why I did this so I could finally let her say what's on her mind.
Red Witch: You should check out 'in the mirror' for more deep stuff like that.
celtcath74: I'm thinking of doing some more don't worry.
Ruby631: Yeah I know that line was just too true.
AN: I'd like to say that a special thanks out to Ruby631 and her story Reality Trip: The Lost Chapter, for giving me the idea how to start this next chapter out. So if you want to know more check it out.
WANDA'S THOUGHTS
Well here I am again writing in this thing. I still can't believe I wrote it the first time, but today was just too weird, well it started off as weird and then it...well...changed, but I'll get to that.
First off I've noticed that ever since I got here for some reason Kurt seems to have been avoiding me. And whenever we're in the same room he gets slightly nervous. Also I noticed that Amanda was pleasant enough but I kept getting this strange undertone with her, and when me and Kurt AND he was in the same room she kept giving me looks, and I swore if I touched Kurt the wrong way she would have used those force blasts of her's on me.
Today I got fed up with it and cornered Kurt and asked him what was going on. He denied all of it of course, but then again I was a little more 'persistent' with him and he cracked. He got me and Amanda together in his room and they came clean.
Apparently on this little trip into other realities that those two and a few of the others went on (what is it about this place, can't they do any NORMAL?) anyways, apparently they ran into these three teenagers and get this...all three were different kids of Rogue's.
Yeah two girls and a boy. They all had Rogue as their mom in different realities but all three had different fathers though. Well they knew this other group of mutants called the Exiles or something and there was this one girl TJ that was the daughter of yet ANOTHER version of Kurt and...well...ME!
Now don't get me wrong Kurt's a nice guy, and kind of sweet, but I don't think of him that way. So when they told me that I suddenly realized why they were acting like that. And I tell you I laughed my ass off. I mean I never laughed like that in my whole life. I was bent over and actually had tears coming out of my face at one point.
I mean they were worried about THAT! I mean get real! After a moment they joined in, in the laughter. We talked it out and well they realized that they were being a little foolish. Now at least those two seemed to have stopped acting weird around me.
Me and Kurt...I just don't see it. That other me must have been completely different from me or something, I mean that's like me going out with a...I don't know...a robot or something. I just can't picture it.
But it makes me think. When I se all the couples around here I feel this void in my life. The only guy I ever had interested in me was Toad, and that's nothing to be proud of. Hell he's also the only guy that I've ever kissed (I had to use a whole bottle of mouthwash to get the taste out when I got back). Well that's not entirely true...there was someone else, but that was just to thank him for the lift back, and for helping me out when those punks hand my hands restraint...I still don't want to think what would have happened if he hadn't shown up.
Yeah well I know he was just stopping by, and sure he lives in New York (but that's less then an hour away). Besides it would be kind of hard to call a guy that wears a mask and who I don't know his real name.
But that's beside the point, when I see all those damn couples all happy and stuff...I just feel...so lonely. I can't remember when I started to feel like this, but sometimes I wonder if I'll find someone out there...I can't believe I'm thinking like this...but I missed out on a lot of things that normal girls take for granted.
I've never been out on a date, never had to sneak out, never got dumped, never got to go to a dance...never been in love...
Sometimes I think the only two emotions I got left are my rage...and my sadness.
I unloaded all my problems with Ororo today along with Blink. She's a good girl and has had it tough ever since her mutation kicked in. We talked today and I learned a few about the both of them. It's so strange, when I was with the Brotherhood I thought the X-Men (can't remember when I stopped thinking them as X-geeks) were all perfect and everything.
Now I see almost everyone has some kind of pain or troubled past. I mean what happened to Blink was bad, not to mention Ororo and her sister. I learned a few things about the others too. I know about Tabitha and that jerk of a father, so I know how that feels, probably another reason I can relate to her more then the others at the moment.
Then I can only imagine what Kurt had to go through life not being able to hide his appearance. I mean I JUST found out today that Scott and Alex's parents died in a plane crash when they were kids. I mean having to say goodbye to your parent and see then die like that...no wonder Scott is all serious and stuff, I'm just guessing Alex either hides his pain better or was too young at the time.
Then there's Dani losing her parents, no one knows how all they know is that she lived with her grandfather after they died. There's also Ray who was kicked out of his home by his parents, Gale who had her mother die in a car accident when she was ten, Rahne who never knew her own mother because she died in child birth...I know how that feels, never to know you mother...but at least she seems to like her adopted one, I forget her name, but she seems to care about her though.
Rogue has also been though a lot, and when I finally asked what the hell was up with her boyfriend's past...well...I'm just surprised the guy isn't screwed up like that new guy Magneto has with him. I also saw a picture of that April girl...I had heard what had happened to her from Lance when Kitty had come over the day she had died.
I remember she came over in tears to the Brotherhood place and Lance tried to comfort her. I saw her crying on his chest and overhear her talking about this new girl that had died. I found out how she died today...it wasn't fair...to only live free for a few days then to die like that...why must there be so much pain...so much hurt in life?
Everyone here seems to have been effected to some degree of some kind of tragedy, or pain...I thought I was alone in that regard...I though I was the only one that hurt...that felt pain in my life...that no one could understand...I was wrong.
Now I see one of the reasons everyone here is so close...they are there for each other, they've gone through something horrible together, they suffered together and they've all come out of it together...stronger then they were.
They aren't just friends because they like each other (which they do) but because they all feel connected to each other, that they can trust one another...I wonder if I will ever be like that?
It doesn't sound so bad...to be with a group that accepts you and would help you when you need it...and that I can trust...I've been burned so many times in my life I'm not sure I can trust anyone again...but I want to and I think I might find that here.
I want to feel like I belong, but I still feel like an outsider so far...sure everyone has been nice to me...but I just don't have those bonds of friendship that the others have. I wonder if this is how Piotr feels too? Although the fact he and Kitty seem to be getting pretty close might help him out to fit in more.
X23-I mean Sarah, seems to be having a little trouble fitting in like I am...but at least she has her friend Paige to help her fit in. Those two seem to be getting along fine, not surprising since they're both tomboys at heart and are roommates. Plus they were together in that cell Magneto had them in...I guess after going through that together you can't help but form a friendship.
Sure me and Rogue got a lot in common too, but we're also clashing a bit. I mean it's kind of like two magnets that are the same polarity pushing against each other...did I just use a SCIENCE TERM?!
I guess I learned something from all the studying after all. Who knew?
But the day had at least one good point to it. I walked into the living room and found Rogue and Vincent watching some old looking show. I asked what they were watching and when they told me an older Canadian show about a vampire cop. I thought to give it a chance. It was actually pretty good considering it didn't have the budget of Angel. (I'm still pissed they cancelled that show, first Buffy now this. I miss Spike and I don't mean Evan)
Although that LaCroix character was kind of freaky, kind of reminded me of Magneto only with more class, but I'll admit that cop guy Nick was hot in his day. Although the show is about fifteen or more years old or something so he most likely doesn't look like that anymore, but I liked it.
Kind of an Angel meets a police show, but without all the demons and magic and stuff. At least now I got something interesting to watch for a while.
Things are getting a little better I think...sure the studying sucks, and the training can be a pain...but I'm started to make some friends here at least. Ororo is much nicer then I thought she would be, I never really got to know her before I moved in and it's nice...nice to have someone like her here, she's kind, caring to us. Sometimes I think if my mom was alive she would be like her.
Blink seems nice too, a little shy at times but she seems like a nice kid...maybe I'll also take up that offer of Tabitha's to go out with some of the girls tonight...I could use the time away from here, and it would be nice to hang out with a few other girls. That was something I never had back at the Brotherhood, surrounded by guys 24-7 can get a little well, insane. Especially considering who I was stuck with at the time.
Well that's all for now I guess, maybe this thing isn't so bad after all...I may not be comfortable talking to the others about some of this, but I can still get it out of me at least.