Chapter V: Daxter and Brutter

As could be expected, a ten-year old can't last long out in the Wasteland desert and Jak was not the exception. He had gone a few miles before falling to the ground. There, he pasted out on the scorching sands.

Several desert birds had noticed the young elf. They were really hungry and were not about to pass up a meal, for in the Wasteland, you don't get to eat often. They landed next to Jak and prepared to eat the poor elf. Luckily for Jak, a war cry spilt the air, and the birds looked up in time to see a big mass of purple fur attacking them. No meal was worth this, the birds flew away.

"Me love Bowling for Buzzards!" The purple-furred Lurker said.

"Gets 'em every time!" said his companion, a small orange Ottsel on his shoulder. The Ottsel jumped off of his shoulder and the Lurker went to investigate what the birds had been so interested in.

"Oh oh." He said. "Daxter, you'd better come look! Me thinks it's still alive!"

The Ottsel called Daxter put on a disgusted face, "Eww!" he said. Daxter came up and sniffed Jak. "What do we have here?" he asked himself. Using all of his strength, he rolled the boy over. He took one look at Jak's long, pointed ears before screaming, "Geez, its an elf!" He tripped over himself, running back to the Lurker. "Run, Brutter, move it!" Daxter yelled.

"Hey, it's just a little elf!" The Lurker called Brutter said, "Look at him! He's so cute! Mays we keep him?"

"Brutter, are you nuts?" Daxter asked, "You're talking about an elf, elves hunt guys like us!"

"But he's so little!" Brutter said.

"Yeah, but he's gonna get bigger!" Daxter said.

"Maybe he'll be on our side." Brutter said.

Daxter laughed. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Maybe…" Daxter paused. "Wait a minute! Maybe he'll be on our side! You know, havin' an elf around might not be such a bad idea!"

"So we're keepin' him?" Brutter asked as he picked up Jak.

"Of coarse, who's the brains of this outfit?" Daxter asked. Brutter was about to answer when Daxter interrupted him again. "Exactly!" Daxter squinted at the sun. "Geez, I'm fried, lets get out of here and find some shade."

The Lurker, carrying Jak and Daxter, headed off to do just that.

(Later)

Brutter and Daxter had found shade and some water. They splashed water on him to wake him up. Jak woke up groggily.

"You okay, kid?" Daxter asked.

"You nearly died!" Brutter said.

"I saved you!" Daxter said proudly, but Brutter gave him an evil glare. "Well… Brutter helped… a little."

"Jak got up and walked away into the desert, "Thanks for your help." He said half-heartedly.

"Hey, where're you goin'?" Daxter asked.

"Nowhere." Jak answered continuing to walk off.

"Geez," Daxter said, "He looks blue."

"Me say pinkish!" Brutter said, referring to Jak's skin color.

"No, I mean he's depressed." Daxter said.

"Oh…" They ran over to Jak, "Hey, kid, what's eating you?" Brutter asked in concern.

"Nothing, he's at the top of the food chain!" Daxter laughed, though nobody else joined. Daxter noticed this and sighed. "So, start easy, shall we? What's your name, kid?"

"Jak." Jak answered shortly. He didn't say his last name. Everyone on the planet, whether they lived in Haven City or not, knew the Mar family, and Jak didn't want anything to do with his former life.

"So…" Daxter said, trying to progress. "Where're you from?"

"I doesn't matter." Jak said, "I can't go back."

"Oh, so you're an outcast!" Daxter said, "That's great! So are we!"

"What'd you do, Jak?" Brutter asked.

"Something terrible," Jak said, "But I don't wanna talk about it."

"Good," Daxter said, "We don't wanna hear about it."

"Come on, Daxter!" Brutter said, "Anything we can do?"

"Not unless you can change the past." Jak answered.

"You know, Jak, in times like this Daxter says 'You've gotta put your behind in your past!" Then he stopped. "No, that not right…"

"No, no, no, Amateur!" Daxter said, "Lie down before you hurt yourself! Its 'You've gotta put your past behind ya!' Look, bad things happen, and there's nothing you can do about it, right?"

"Right," Jak agreed, but Daxter stopped him.

"Wrong!" Daxter said, poking Jak on the nose. "When the world turns its back on you, you turn your back on the world!"

"Well, that's not what I was taught." Jak said.

"Then maybe you need a new lesion! Repeat after me:" Daxter cleared his throat. "Hakuna Matata!"

"What?" Jak asked.

"Hakuna Matata!" Brutter said slowly. "It means 'No Worries!"

Daxter sang:

"Hakuna Matata!

What a wonder phrase!"

Brutter sang:

"Hakuna Matata!

Ain't no passin' craze!"

Daxter sang:

"It means 'No Worries!'

For the rest of your days!"

They both sang:

"Its our problem-free

Philosophy!

Hakuna Matata!"

"Hakuna Matata?" Jak asked.

"Yeah, its our motto!" Brutter said.

"What's a motto?" Jak asked.

"Nothing, what's the 'motto' with you?" Daxter asked. He and Brutter laughed.

"You know, Jak, these two words will solve all your problems!" Brutter said.

"Yeah, take Brutter here! Why…" Daxter sang:

"When he was a young Lurker!"

Brutter sang:

"When me was a young Lurker!"

"Very nice…" Daxter said, trying to clear out his ears.

"Thanks!" Brutter said, missing the sarcasm.

Daxter sang:

"He found his aroma lacked a certain appeal,

He could clear the continent after every meal!"

Brutter sang:

"I'm a sensitive soul,

Though me seemed thick-skinned!

And it hurt

That my friends never stood downwind!

And, oh, the shame!"

Daxter echoed:

"He was ashamed!"

Brutter sang:

"Thought-a changin' my name!"

Daxter sang:

"Oh, what's in a name?"

Brutter sang:

"And I got down-hearted!"

Daxter sang:

"How'd you feel?"

Brutter sang:

"Every time that I…"

But Daxter stopped him. "Brutter, not in front of the kids!"

"Oh, sorry." Brutter said, Jak blinked.

They both sang"

"Hakuna Matata!

What a wonderful phrase!

Hakuna Matata!

Ain't no passin' craze!"

Jak joined in:

"It means 'no worries'

For the rest of your days!"

"Yeah, sing it, kid!" Daxter said.

They all sang:

"Its our problem-free

Philosophy!

Hakuna Matata!"

"Welcome to our humble home!" Daxter said, pulling back some vegetation, to reveal a place with waterfalls, tropical birds, the works.

"You live here?" Jak asked, amazed.

"We live wherever we want." Daxter said.

"Yep, home is where your rump rests!" Brutter said.

"So, kid, you with us?" Daxter asked. "This here is the great life! No ruled, no responsibilities, and best of all, no worries! Well, kid?"

Jak looked around the utopian paradise, and then back towards Haven City, he couldn't see it anymore. Jak smiled, "Hakuna Matata!"

"That's it!" Daxter said.

(A/N: Here we press the fast forward button on the story. We see several images, each one with Jak getting a little bit older. Yes, hot Jak is here! Finally, Jak looks very much like his 'Jak 2 Style.' Goatee… long green/blonde hair… you know… Hot Jak!)

Daxter and Brutter are singing:

"Hakuna! Matata!

Hakuna! Matata!"

Hottie Jak jumps in and sings:

"It means 'no worries'

For the rest of your days!"

All three sing:

"It's our problem-free

Philosophy!

Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna Matata!"

Daxter softly sings:

"Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna Matata!"

Jak joins in, louder, so you get a harmony:

"Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna Matata!

They all dance off into the sunset, singing and dancing.

LES: Go to the next Chapter, I command it!