PART THIRTEEN

Forbidden

I knew that my friends had started to suspect me then. They started to think there was something wrong with me, and that I wasn't acting normally. I couldn't blame them. It was becoming harder and harder to keep things to myself, and I knew that sooner or later I would have to tell them everything. Everything that had been going on with me. Everything they needed to know. And it wasn't going to be pretty. I was lucky I got through the few weeks before the start of the holidays. I had made it that far. But even with the urge to reveal everything during the second Hogsmeade trip of the year, just before the Christmas break, I couldn't bring myself to tell them again. I regret now that I hadn't told them sooner.

***

Ginny looked worriedly out the window of the Three Broomsticks, watching as the snow flakes continued to pour down on the already white ground outside. She sighed. She knew she wasn't supposed to feel this way, but she couldn't help it. She was worried…and curious.

"So much for lifting Hermione's duties," Ron grumbled, scratching his nose. "McGonagall really doesn't have a heart. Imagine assigning so much work for her right before the holidays!"

Ginny turned away from the windows and faced her brother. "Ron, I do think it's only normal for McGonagall to make sure the students have all packed their stuff before they leave tomorrow. Do you honestly believe that she can do all that by herself? Naturally she has to ask the help of Neville and Hermione. It's not easy to patrol all the students' dormitories and check if they've all packed everything they need to pack."

"I know that, but can't she ask Hermione's help after the trip? Today's actually the first trip to Hogsmeade that Harry and I made without Hermione in here as well. Right, Harry?" Ron leaned across the table to snap his fingers in front of Harry's face.

"What? Oh, yeah. The first time," he said absently.

Ron shook his head at Harry's preoccupied behavior and Ginny turned to look at the windows again. She couldn't help but wonder how Hermione was doing now, and more importantly, how she was doing with Malfoy now. She knew that Malfoy had stayed behind for some reason—she didn't see him board the carriages to Hogsmeade with Crabbe and Goyle—but she knew that Hermione didn't know that Malfoy stayed behind. Ginny was really curious and she wanted to know if they'd made up yet. They just had to, or else she knew Hermione would spend her holidays brooding at home. And surely, she didn't want that to happen.

Ginny pushed her chair back and stood up, startling Ron. "I think I'm going back to Hogwarts now."

"Why? Are you sick?" Ron asked anxiously.

"No, I'm fine. I just have…more packing to do. See you later." She grabbed her coat.

"Oh, great. Go ahead and leave me with Space-head Boy here," Ron jerked his head towards a very oblivious Harry.

Ginny chuckled. "I'm sorry, Ron; I really need to go." And she headed out the door.

Whatever was up with Harry was definitely less important than what was up with Hermione and Malfoy back at the castle. At least, in Ginny's opinion.

***

Hermione blew out a breath of air and placed her hand on her forehead, completely exhausted yet glad that her duties were finally over. She had just been to the last dormitory and was now heading back up the stairs to the Gryffindor Tower, never more craving for a long, hot bath. The sun had gone down but none of the students were back from Hogsmeade yet, and she suddenly wished she were there with her two best friends, just chilling out. Too bad she was Head Girl this year.

She looked out the window in the staircase and stopped dead in her tracks. Out in the open fields of the wide Hogwarts grounds, was a tiny speck among the snowy patches outside. What in the world was that? It couldn't possibly be a student, because as far as Hermione knew, everyone had gone to Hogsmeade in celebration of the holidays the next day except for her and Neville. She squinted, surprised at herself that she had seen the small dot even through the darkness of the early evening. Could it be another one of Hagrid's pets, out loose on the grounds?

She looked longingly up the stairs at the hall where the portrait of the Fat Lady was stationed, imagining her bathtub just beyond the portrait hole. But then she looked back at the unmoving speck outside, and realized reluctantly that she had to inspect that certain speck as part of being Head Girl. Yet another disadvantage.

She sighed and headed hurriedly down the stairs, thinking that the earlier she got this over with, the earlier she could soak in her tub.

She pushed the front doors open and wrapped her coat more tightly around her, thankful that the snow wasn't blowing hard but was rather gently falling down the ground. "Lumos," she said, lifting her wand. She quietly wound her way through the snow, and stopped right behind a tree as soon as she got to the clearing where the speck was. She bit her lip nervously and her breath instantly got caught in her throat.

Malfoy was lying down carelessly on the soft snow, one hand behind his head, staring absently at the stars sparkling gloriously in the sky. He was holding his wand in his other hand, waving its end aimlessly as if he were writing something on the sky with it. Snow was lightly falling all around him, yet he didn't seem to care at all. His eyes were dazed and he looked distracted, and Hermione's heart pounded, seeing the serenity on his face. For a moment she wondered why he hadn't gone to Hogsmeade with his friends and what he was doing out in the snow like this, but then all her thoughts vanished as soon as she heard him speak.

"I don't know…" he whispered almost inaudibly, and Hermione leaned closer to the tree to listen.

"I don't know why it seems to me that my world is falling apart whenever you're away…and you're not making it easier for me either whenever you walk past," he continued, still staring at the sky. "So please don't lead me on because my heart is weak, okay? Because it's the grace of your touch…the softness of your lips…the beauty of your face…the warmth of your smile…and the heaven I see in your eyes…nothing can be more perfect, and I'm a fool to have fallen for it all. So please…don't toy with me…you know I'm not that strong…"

Hermione placed a hand over her mouth, her lips trembling. Could Malfoy be saying what she thought he was saying?

"I'm not so sure I can tell you everything I wish to say. Before you I am nothing, and I'm not even worthy to whisper your name…" Malfoy trailed off, and Hermione peeked at him even more. Then she realized that he was actually scribbling her name in the air with his wand. She was deeply moved, but nothing could possibly top the way she felt when she heard Malfoy's next words.

"This is wrong, Hermione—I know it—but there's nothing I can do…" Malfoy dropped his wand and his voice softened even more. "I can never stop myself from falling in love with you…"

***

"Then what in the world are you waiting for??? Go for it before it's too late again!!!" Ginny exclaimed, pumping her fist energetically in the air even later that night.

"I know that, Ginny. I just can't seem to…move my legs and actually go to his dormitory and tell him," Hermione said in a flustered way, dropping down on her bed. She so hated her dilemma. She so hated herself.

"Ugh," Ginny threw her hands up and rose from her seat. "That's it. You're never going to find true love in your state. It takes guts, but I don't think you have any."

Hermione clamped a pillow over her head and cried out a muffled scream. Malfoy was in love with her. In love! And she couldn't even muster enough courage to tell him that she felt the same way. She hated her own guts, so she couldn't blame Ginny for hating her guts, too.

Ginny sighed. "I'm sorry, Hermione. But I think this is all up to you now." She shook her head and walked to the door. "It's almost midnight. Just try and get some sleep, okay?"

Hermione threw the pillow on the floor and sighed as well. "Okay, Ginny. Thanks again."

"Good night," and Ginny left.

Hermione lazily got up from the bed and waved her wand around, casting the Heating Charm on her room again, her mind still filled with thoughts of Malfoy. She brought out her Put-Outer and in a second her room was pitch black. She didn't really want to leave the lampshade on because the dark matched her mood perfectly. Besides, she felt that the moonlight from her window was bright enough.

Slowly and inattentively, she began undressing herself, feeling the effects of the spell she'd cast. Her clothes dropped with a thud on the carpeted floor, and she sadly crawled into bed, pulling the covers over her naked body. This was it. Tomorrow was the start of the holidays already, and she was going to head back home first thing in the morning. She would never be able to speak to Malfoy again, much less tell him how she felt. And it was all because she couldn't find it in her to tell him sooner.

She sighed dejectedly, wishing the impossible that she would somehow be able to see Malfoy before she fell asleep tonight. She missed him so much…and she couldn't help but feel the sensuality rise up inside of her. She found a burbling sensation between her legs and on her chest…and all of a sudden she had this strong urge for his rough, manly touch…

Hermione closed her eyes and her hands unknowingly crawled all over her own body, touching herself in all places. She opened her mouth in a silent moan as she squeezed her own breasts, fondling her aroused and hardened nipples, and fingered her own clit, imagining Malfoy's firm chest above her and his strong arms around her. She let out a small cry of pleasure as she inserted her finger into herself, recalling every detail of how Malfoy had pleasured her that night in the study when they first made love. She continued to toy with herself even more…as she shut her eyes and felt the hot wetness down where she was pleasuring herself…throwing her head back against the pillows…

But then her window burst open and she shrieked, instantly stopping what she was doing and sitting up in bed, clutching the covers tighter to her chest. She took her wand and looked at the window in horror.

"Oh my god!" She immediately pointed to the door and locked it as soon as she saw what had happened to her window. "Draco, what are you doing here???"

Malfoy had just entered her room again and was now closing the window. He took off his coat and looked at Hermione in shock. "You're still awake?"

"Darn right I am!" Hermione said in utter surprise. She climbed out of bed and approached him, careful to make sure that the covers were still wrapped around her body. She knew that they'd already made love once, and that she was actually fantasizing about doing it again just a while ago, but still she couldn't help but feel ashamed to just let him see her naked again. "What the hell are you doing? You're not supposed to be here! Do you have any idea what time it is?" She asked continuously, her face flushed in embarrassment that he might have seen what she was doing before he came.

"Of course I do! That's the reason I came here in the first place; I thought you'd be asleep," he replied irritably, removing his gloves.

"It doesn't matter if I'm asleep or not! You're not supposed to be here!" Hermione argued huffily. Her eyes traveled down his body. "Look at you! You're all covered in snow! Have you ever heard of not going out during winter nights??? You're going to get yourself sick like this!" She scolded and dusted his clothes with her free hand. She clutched the covers to her chest even more tightly, her brows furrowing as she cleared off the snow on him. "Honestly…" she continued, but realized that Malfoy had suddenly kept quiet. She looked up and saw that he was just standing there, looking uncertainly at her.

All of a sudden, Hermione stopped and started to blush. She looked down uneasily. She hadn't realized that they had actually talked again. They had actually talked to each other, and had gotten to see each other up-close again after such a long time. This was what she had been wanting since that day she started avoiding him, and now that it had come, all she could do was scold him and get all irritated.

But she wasn't really annoyed, was she? She was just surprised…he'd broken into her room just so he could see her…right? She was definitely shocked…in fact…she was touched…and happy. He was here again. Her wish had come true. She was able to see him before she fell asleep tonight. Now was her chance to tell him how much she loved him…and to explain that she merely overreacted that day when she started avoiding him. This was her chance to tell him everything.

So what was she doing, staring at the floor like it held the meaning of life? She should start talking! And start off by explaining that she scolded him just now not because she was mad, but because she truly cared for him and was concerned that he might get caught or get sick doing what he did!

Come on, Hermione! She urged herself. Just tell him already!

Hermione took a deep breath and looked him right in the eye. But as soon as she did, she felt every nerve in her body collapse, and all of a sudden she couldn't find the right words to say. "Hey," she said lamely, wanting to kick herself right after hearing what she'd just said.

"Hey," Malfoy greeted back, the corners of his lips tugging a bit to form a very lopsided smile.

"Er…" Hermione started fumbling with the folds of the covers she was holding against her, not knowing what else to say. Luckily, she didn't need to, because Malfoy spoke up first.

"Look, I know I'm not supposed to be here," he began, never taking his eyes off her, "and I know you're probably still mad at me for—"

"I'm not mad at you!" Hermione blurted out right away, and blushed. "I mean—I was confused that day…and I—"

"It's okay, I still want to say I'm sorry, though," Malfoy said. "I'm sorry for everything I ever did to…to hurt you or…make you feel less good about yourself. Because you shouldn't—you're the best person I've ever known."

Hermione's eyes softened as she watched him look down on the floor, obviously having an inner debate on something. She bit back a small smile.

"And as you know, it's…it's the start of the holidays tomorrow, and I know you're heading home to the Muggle world first thing in the morning, so…" He reached into his pocket and took out a small rectangular box. "I just wanted to give this to you before you leave."

Hermione speechlessly took the box that he handed to her, her heart pounding in her chest. What in the world could it possibly be?

She looked back uncertainly at Malfoy, but he smiled reassuringly and said, "Go on, open it. It's yours."

She gently opened the box and tears immediately welled up in her eyes as soon as she did. Inside the velvet box was a brilliant silver necklace, with a heart-shaped pendant and its chain embedded with small emerald gems. Hermione had never seen anything so beautiful in her life.

"Draco…" she whispered, not knowing what to say as he took the necklace from the box and gently clasped it around her neck. Her skin tingled at his warm touch, and she paid special attention to the way his fingers lingered on her neck for a while before he took a small step backwards.

"It looks perfect on you," he said, admiring her reddening face. "It's a locket that contains my every single memory of you and of the two of us together," he smiled. "So every time you open it and you see something new? Then you know that I'm thinking of you. I always do, you know…"

Hermione gently opened the locket on her neck and a small hologram immediately shone out, flashing by every scene of Malfoy's thoughts about her like a video camera. Hermione closed the locket and smiled, silent tears finally trickling down her cheeks. "Draco, I…don't know what to say…"

"You don't have to." Malfoy looked down and suddenly looked all nervous again. He swallowed heavily and looked back at Hermione, a streak of red across his face. He shoved his hands into his pockets and bit his lip.

Hermione's brows knit in concern. "What is it…?"

Malfoy didn't take his eyes off the floor. "Listen, there's…something I need to tell you."

Hermione kept silent, patiently giving him all the time he needed. Whatever he had to say was obviously burdening him, seeing as he was stammering and looking torn. But after a few seconds, he finally looked back up at her face, and she had never seen a more sincere look than what he was giving her right now.

"Hermione, I…I love you…" he breathed softly, looking like he had so much more to say, but couldn't. He kept his gaze on her, just as she kept her gaze on him, and for a while neither of them spoke at all.

Finally, Hermione looked away from him, her face flushing. She didn't know what to do or how to react. She was a mixture of shock, joy, anxiety, and doubt. How could she possibly think up a reply, or any reaction at all, in a matter of seconds?

Malfoy, though, took that hesitation as a painful rejection. It wasn't as though he was expecting her to feel the same way; after all, he knew she could never love someone as awful as him. In fact, he had expected that she would definitely not return the affection. There still was, however, a tiny speck of hope that perhaps she might love him back, and so it would be a lie to say he wasn't disappointed. He was hurt—like hell he was hurt—but he had long accepted it. What mattered now was that he'd laid it out in the open. He'd told her. Now she knew.

Malfoy cleared his throat, trying to fight the trembling hurt in his voice. "That's all I wanted to say. Merry Christmas." And he turned around, angry at his weakness. There was no point hurting. There was no point looking back.

He took his things and was just about to leave, but then he felt Hermione's hand forcefully grab his arm. He'd barely turned around at her when he felt her lean close and kiss him hungrily on the lips.

His eyes immediately shut close at the feel of her soft lips on his, and as he kissed her back he could taste the salty tears still silently trickling down her cheeks. All his thoughts—even his unsurpassed joy—flew from his mind as Hermione deepened their kiss impatiently, and he placed his hands on her hips as she kissed him harder.

Hermione's tongue plunged eagerly into him and he forgot to breathe. He didn't know why she was acting so aggressively, but heck; he loved it. Perhaps she was feeling the same emptiness within him that had been aching since they last saw each other. But he was far too engrossed to dwell on it. Besides, it was happening, so there was no point trying to know the reason.

He continued kissing her passionately until she moaned into his mouth, and then both her hands crawled up around his neck, causing the covers around her to drop down the floor. Hermione pulled him closer to her and he felt her breasts press against him. He immediately opened his eyes and, blushing heavily, gently broke away from the heated kiss.

They stayed there for a while, still cuddled together, panting. Hermione's eyes softened. "What's wrong, Draco…?"

Malfoy blushed even more and he instantly looked away. "Hermione, I…I think you should…er…put something on."

She went silent for a while, and then she chuckled lightly in amusement. "That's what's bothering you…?" She let go of him and took a small step backwards. "C'mon, Draco. Look at me."

"Herm—"

"Look at me," she said gently, smiling. "Please?"

Malfoy hesitantly turned his head towards her, and his eyes slowly made their way from her feet up to her face. His heart went crazy, as he gazed at her naked beauty, standing there just a few inches from him. "God, you're so beautiful…even more than before…" he breathed in awe.

Hermione stepped closer to him and reached out to cup his cheek. She looked tearfully into his eyes and said, "Draco, I love you, too…I always have. And you have no idea how grateful I am that you respect me, and that you don't want to take advantage of me. But you're heading back home tomorrow as well, and we won't be seeing each other for a while, so…" Her other hand started to slowly rub his chest. "I just want to give you a reminder of how much I love you, before we part ways…" She tiptoed and kissed him again. "Is that okay with you…?"

Malfoy merely grinned and kissed her back, and her eyes shut close as her lips curved into a smile. He started kissing her with the same desire she'd shown a while ago, and his hands gingerly caressed her bare back. Hermione moaned again when he pulled her closer, and she could almost feel his arousal. This somehow made her even hungrier, and she began kissing him even deeper, as they both moved across her room without balance.

In their ravenous frenzy they found themselves slamming against the wall, Hermione pinned up forcefully, with Malfoy still kissing her and making her feel like her taste was driving him crazy. Groan after groan both of them plunged and roamed and explored each other's depths, craving for more with each taste. After a while Malfoy strayed from her swollen lips and kissed her neck, licking her smooth skin voraciously as Hermione closed her eyes and exposed herself even more to him, leaning her head back against the wall. He bit into her and she opened her mouth wide in a silent blissful moan, making her seize his shirt, lustfully strip him of all his clothes, and pull him towards her eager body. At the feel of her round, plump breasts pressed against his bare chest, he reached down and grabbed her butt—causing an excited giggle from her—hoisting her up so that her aching breasts were leveled with his wet mouth. And that was when he sucked. Hard.

At that moment Hermione lost all of what's left in her and felt nothing more than wild, animal lust. The length of time that she'd desired this moment finally took its toll, and she groaned, pulling his head deeper into her breasts. She loved the feeling of being squashed up against the wall, and how she loved the way he was sucking at her mounds like there was nothing in this world that he'd wanted more.

After leaving her reddened nipple wet and incredibly aroused, Malfoy transferred to the other breast, and as he did so, one of his hands cupping her butt cheeks crawled instantly to her front. He grabbed her wet treasure and inserted his fingers into her heavily throbbing clit.

Hermione moaned out his name, rubbing herself against the wall, panting. She folded up one of her knees and spread it out, while one of her legs tried to keep herself balanced on the floor on tiptoe, because she was still a little elevated, what with him sucking her full breast. She continued to groan as she spread her leg wider and Malfoy increased the wetness in her soaking crotch, and when she couldn't take it any longer, she grabbed his pants and unzipped them, ripping off his boxers and diving under his underwear to wrap her fingers tightly around his hard, erect member.

Malfoy was compelled to let go of her breast as he groaned at her touch, and Hermione wondered for a minute if anyone would hear them. But she didn't really give a damn. All she could think of was the untamed desire burning inside her as she reached floor level again and Malfoy kissed her passionately, the both of them moaning and making sounds extremely erotic to them both. Hermione wanted more than anything to ram what she was holding into where his fingers were, and at this thought, she gave a huge spurt of wetness down at her already dripping clit.

Her moisture made Malfoy even more aware of how he was affecting her, and he was glad he was able to cause that in her. Because, god, how her fingers were stroking him! It was purely bliss, and he didn't know if he could go on with how she was making him even more erect. He reluctantly pulled his fingers out of her velvety tightness, eliciting a loud groaning protest from her. The two of them broke the heated kiss and opened their eyes, and Malfoy licked his wet fingers, getting a sample of what he knew he'd be tasting next. Hermione watched him with a plea in her eyes, and Malfoy grinned, whispering in her ear, "God, Hermione…I want you…"

Hermione was just about to reply when Malfoy immediately dropped down on his knees, causing her to let go of his staff. She wanted to drop on the floor with him, but was stopped when he grabbed her knees, spread out her legs, and sucked her damp clit without warning.

Hermione bucked against the wall and cried out loud, sweat breaking out from her temples as his tongue teased her spot and made her dizzy with craving. Everything was happening so fast tonight, and the both of them were touching, grasping, and springing at each other like savage beasts. How long had they been yearning for this? How long had this moment been in their wet dreams? Now Hermione knew what wild sex was like, and what happened when desires burned too much.

Malfoy continued to suck insatiably at her, and she clenched her fists on his disheveled hair, moaning in extreme pleasure. She grunted and panted louder and louder with each lick, making him even more aroused. He sucked deeper and deeper, and his hands traveled up to squeeze her breasts, and with all the raging sensations burbling inside Hermione, she couldn't help but shudder as she leaned against the wall, shut her eyes, and released madly. She screamed his name and pulled his head deeper still into her.

He hungrily drank all of her secretions as she came furiously, lusciously tasting every single feminine drop. Even after the last squirt, he continued eating her pussy and kneading her breasts like he simply couldn't get enough. Hermione continued moaning, and her moans drove him wild with even more desire. At last he let go of her breasts and he grabbed her butt again, lifting her up away from the wall and carrying her, still licking, to her bed. They both crashed onto the soft mattress and he finally gave one last lick at her swollen clit, this time kissing her inner thighs and inhaling the wonderful scent of her release filling the room.

Hermione couldn't help but whimper at his lip action, and she realized she ought to have a turn at this. She jumped up and caught him off-guard, grabbing his shoulders and lunging at him, pinning him down on the bed. She made no delays and thrust her tongue into his mouth.

She fought a playful battle with him as they wrestled each other's tongues, and she stopped kissing him only when she heard him let out a moan.

She then leaned close to his ear. "Do you have any idea how much I've longed for you since we stopped talking…?"

Malfoy grinned, his eyes closing again as she nibbled his earlobe. "If it's the same as how much I've longed for you, then yes."

Hermione smiled and kissed his lips hungrily once more, pressing her breasts against his bare chest. Malfoy groaned into her and started fondling with her aching breasts. At this, her free hand hurriedly ran down to his member again, as she eagerly grabbed his hardness. Malfoy groaned and almost bit her lip. He stopped the kiss and looked at her. "What are you doing?"

"Shut up and go on," she said breathlessly, still pleasuring over his molesting expertise. But Malfoy grinned and removed his hands from her mounds, and Hermione whined her disapproval.

"What if I don't want to?" Malfoy asked teasingly. "What if I need you to make it up to me after all the nights you didn't want to have sex in the study…?"

She chuckled mischievously, pushing herself away from him and positioning herself. "Fine then," she breathed in a low and seductive tone. "Let me just warn you that right now, you're with a very, very naughty girl." At the word "girl", she took him completely into her tightness, and they both groaned at the perfect bliss. 

They began moving against each other, making love throughout the whole night, and Hermione moaned out loud, losing every emotion and every sense of reason to her lust. They've both just professed their love for each other, and now they were proving it. She was only seventeen; she knew that. But this wasn't just some longing for release, or just an accident because of their uncontrollable teenage desires. This was different; it was as though she was making love for the first time.

Because right now, she was a woman, in the arms of the one man she truly loved.

OMIGAWD!!! I FINALLY UPDATED!!! After months of leaving my fanfic to grow its own mold culture and making you readers want to barge into my house and make me update right away, I finally did it!!! and, yes, you probably all know what I'm about to say, because it seems that its all I've been saying every time I upload. I'M SORRY!!! I truly, terribly, fully, completely, totally, and other-words-that-end-with—ly, am sorry! I've made you guys wait long enough. But still, despite my overly lazy and busy butt, you guys have stuck around waiting for me to upload the next chappie…and I'm really thankful!!! You guys are the best, and your reviews are totally awesome. You guys helped me a lot to go on with this fic, and I can't thank you all enough. Your comments are wonderful, you are all great readers! :D sniff sniff…I'm way touched :D Of course, to make up for the HUGE gap I made, I think I'll be uploading four or five chaps today…just to make it up to you guys :D So please sit back, relax, and get ready for the return of fujingrl!!! :D

Coming up next: Harry makes a move on Cho! Ginny sees something she's…er…quite not ready for! Lucius discovers something he wasn't supposed to! Aaaaaaaaaaand (drum roll please) the revelation of our long-awaited mystery narrator! ^.^ (Btw, how was this chapter? Did Malfoy and Hermione make out enough?:D )