SEQ CHAPTER h r 1Perfection: A Smallville Christmas Storytc "Perfection: A Smallville Christmas Story"

Chapter Two

His time in the Kent's bathroom seemed like forever as Alexander Luthor rubbed cold water on his face for the third time. He kept looking at his reflection in the medicine cabinet mirror and could not help but wonder what could possibly be wrong with him. Everything in his life was perfect like he had always hoped it would be, but still there was a nagging twinge, a heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach that all was not well, and his entire world, if not he himself, was completely out of place.

He was so caught up in trying to figure out what could be amiss that he nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard the gentle rapping on the door. Knocking the set of toothbrushes from their perch around the cup holder with his start, Lex regained his composure and tried to tidy up the small mess he had made.

"I'll be right out," he called, wiping the spilled water with a few pieces of toilet paper. "Just a minute."

"Lex?" The concerned voice of his best friend Clark Kent called back from the hall. "You've been up here an awful long time."

"I'm," he stumbled on his own words. "I'm fine, Clark. I just lost track of the time."

Wiping his hands on his pant leg, Lex reached for the doorknob and opened it to a very worried looking Clark Kent. Clark had changed out of his wet snowballing cloths into a fresh pair of jeans. He had on an over sized red sweatshirt with a hint of a blue tee shirt around the neck. "Everything is okay, Clark," Lex tried to smile past his concern.

Clark had known Lex well enough to know something was up, and he slipped into the small room next to his friend. He eyed Lex over carefully and determined that, indeed, his friend was lying.

"You're not okay, Lex," Clark's instincts kicked in and he felt Lex's head with the back of his hand. "You are warm, but not feverish," he said, still searching for a sign of the problem in his face. "Did you overdo it in the snow? Some people don't handle the cold and wet as well as others."

"I'm fine," Lex raised his arms to emphasize the point. "I just lost track of time."

"I don't know, Lex," Clark leaned against the wall behind him. "You haven't been home from the hospital all that long. Maybe we pushed you a little too early today."

"Clark," Lex leaned in. "For the last time, I am fine. Stop trying to mother me to death."

"Okay, okay," Clark put up his hands in a defensive pose. "I was just worried about you. I mean first you said you needed to use the upstairs bathroom. Then I had time to undress, dry off and put on a whole new set of cloths while you were in here being real mysterious."

The knee jerk reaction was to keep putting up his defenses, but this was Clark Kent Lex was dealing with, and he knew from experience that the farm boy had a sixth sense when it came to detecting a problem. He would not give up until his hero complex was able to fix it. Lex took a deep breath and leaned against the sink counter behind him as he face his friend.

"I'm not sick, Clark," his tone was soft and he hoped assuring. "At least not like you are thinking."

Clark crossed his arms over his chest and tried to catch Lex's eyes that were looking at every object in the room but his own. "What is it, Lex?"

After several seconds of toying with his hands, Lex's head rose. "I'm confused, Clark."

"Confused?" Clark repeated. "What about?"

Letting out a long breath, Lex glanced up at the ceiling. "Everything, I think."

"Lex," Clark tried to be supportive. "The doctors said that this might happen if you tried to push yourself too hard too fast. You just need to slow down a little."

"Clark," their eyes finally met. "I can't explain it, but everything seems wrong."

"How, Lex?"

Their conversation was interrupted by a soft knock on the open door, and they both turned to see Ryan standing with a short stack of towels.

"Ryan?" Lex's jaw dropped.

"Hi, Lex," Ryan returned with a nod handing the towels off to Clark. "Mom asked me to bring these up to put out in here." He explained not taking his eyes off of Lex's amazed stare at him. "She didn't know anyone would be using this bathroom and forgot to put them out before company came over."

"Thanks," Clark took the stack and slipped them into the linen closet next to where he stood. "Tell Mom we'll be down in a minute."

"Sure," Ryan smiled at both of them. "You better hurry, because Mister Luthor is threatening to eat all of the stuffing before anyone else has a chance for seconds."

"No problem," Clark laughed closing the door behind his little brother and turning back to Lex who was still dazed by the appearance of the teen.

"What is it, Lex?" Clark finally asked. "Did Ryan upset you?"

"Ryan," Lex snapped out of his daze state, but still remained confused as he looked at Clark. "Ryan is here, living?"

"Of course," Clark placed his hand of Lex's shoulder and looked into his eyes. "Don't you remember? My folks adopted him last year after you found that doctor who was able to operate and remove the brain tumor that was killing him."

"He survived?" Lex asked.

"Yes, of course he did," Clark almost chuckled. "Ryan has been perfect ever since he recovered and he and Julian have become the best of friends. Even with the age difference, they were able to become fast friends, and to be honest, I think they are using our bond as a role model."

"Julian and Ryan are friends," Lex rolled the idea around in his head for a few seconds. "That's great, Clark." His face was contrary to his words and Clark was quick to notice.

"What is it, Lex?" He tilted his head to look at Lex's turned away face. "Is there something about Ryan and Julian that you are confused about?"

After a long pause, Lex finally raised his head and looked straight into Clark's eyes. "Everything about them is wrong, Clark."

Clark remained silent and looked longingly at his friend.

"I can't explain it Clark," Lex insisted with a grunt. "But everything inside of me is telling me that this is not right. I know in my heart of hearts that this is not right."

The two young men stood silent for several minutes as they could hear the enjoyment and revelry of an entire house filled with people enjoying themselves one floor below. The sounds of joy only left an even more eerie feeling in the pit of Lex's stomach.

It was a few more minutes before Lex and Clark made it down to the bottom of the steps and stood for a moment in the hall just outside of the dinning area. They listened to the joy and revelry of all the people in the next room, and Clark could not help but smile at the delight in each person's voice. He saw that Lex was unable to share in that joy, and put his hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright, Lex?" He said softly. "I'm right here to help, and I won't leave you."

Lex nodded once tapping Clark's hand. "Thanks, Clark." They then made their way into the room.

"Well, how nice of you two to finally join us," Jonathan remarked with a grin as they walked up behind his chair at the far end of the table.

"Its about time," Lionel added dishing some stuffing onto his plate from the opposite far seat. "We were considering the cost effectiveness of sending out a search party for you."

"Oh, Lionel," Lillian slapped his shoulder playfully from her seat to his right.

"That's it, Lionel," Martha called out from Jonathan's right hand. "The boys are back, so I am cutting you off from anymore stuffing to make sure there is enough for everyone."

"Huh," Julian snickered from his place next to his mother. "I bet no one has ever told you no before."

Lionel tossed Julian a little annoyed smirk.

Clark took his usual seat next to his mother just to the left of Lana. "I guess this seat would be mine," he remarked as he sat down.

Lex made his way over to the opposite side and saw where Ryan was seated to Julian's right from his seat at Lillian's side. "Hey, Ryan," Lex tapped him lightly on the shoulder. "Mind moving over one so I can sit next to my little brother?'

"Sure," Ryan slid to his right taking his full plate of food with him. "But you'll have to fight your Dad for your own stuffing."

Lex chuckled as he slipped into his seat. "I'll take my chances," he said with a smile. "I think my father and I have learned how to barter by now in life."

Julian had stopped eating and was watching his brother attentively.

"Hey, squirt," Lex gave him a quick half hug. "You don't mind me asking Ryan to move, do you?"

"No," Julian replied with knife and folk in hand lingering over his plate. "But how come?"

Placing a napkin over his lap, Lex stopped half way as he reached for the mash potatoes. "How come what?"

Julian shot his Mom and Dad a quick look and then turned back. "How come you want to sit next to me all of a sudden? Back home, when you aren't torturing me, you are just plane avoiding me all together."

The statement stabbed at Lex's heart. "I don't always torture you, Julian," he paused. "Do I?"

"Face it Lex," Julian lowered his utensils and looked away. "You hate me, and even say so all the times."

Again, it were as if a knife were piercing Lex's heart, and it was all he could do to keep from becoming physically ill. Of all the things that did not feel right to him at this moment, this was the most damaging.

Lex folded his hands and leaned forward on the table. He wanted to jump out of his skin at that moment, and he could feel the eyes of the room staring at him. He knew he had to regroup himself and say something fast. Turning his head to look into his brother's deep blue eyes, it took everything for Lex to keep from breaking down. He could barely remember a moment with this child who was his closest flesh outside of his mother's womb. The thought that he could have tortured this young soul and not recall his misdeeds tore a hole in his heart. But still, Julian's honest and kind face waited for an answer.

Lex wrapped his left arm around Julian's small frame and the other around his head pulling him close. "I've had a change of heart, little brother," he forced his tears back. "I was wrong all those other times."

Not sure what to do, Julian shrugged his shoulders. "It's no big deal, Lex," he said pulling away. "I'll get over it."

With out further conversation, Julian returned to his plate and the others around the table tried to do the same. "Here," Clark's voice said softly from across the table holding out a bowl of string beans.

The voice snapped Lex's out of his trance and he looked across at Clark's comforting face. If anyone at that table could help him though this confusion, he knew Clark would be the one to try. "Thanks," he took the bowl and began to spread food across his plate.

"Lex," again a voiced called out to him. He found himself transfixed by the bright lights and decorations of the Kent's Christmas tree in the living room. The glow from the branches lit the entire room with a warm shine as an old CD of musical Christmas tune played softly in the background. Lex turned quickly at the sound of the voice, but no one was there. It seemed everyone had found somewhere else to be at the moment, and he honestly could not remember how he got from the dining room to the decoration. Yet still, that voice was sure and apparent and he spun around two more times.

"Hey, Lex," Clark showed up as if by magic and stopped him dead in his spin. The younger man held his shoulders firmly and looked into his eyes. "Lex," he repeated. "What's with the spinning? You're going to make yourself sick."

"Oh, yeah," Lex forced a small grin. "I wasn't thinking. I just thought I heard my father's voice and I was looking for him."

"Well, you're hearing things, buddy," Clark slapped his arm as he pulled away. "Your dad is out in the livestock barn with my Dad studying the new milking machine my dad bought."

"Oh," Lex rubbed his face for a second. "I must have been imagining it."

"No big deal," Clark placed his hands in his jean pockets and shrugged. "Happens to me all the time."

Lex tried to move past it and turned his attention back to the tree.

"Beautiful, isn't it," Clark commented. "My mom really knows how to deck the halls."

"Yeah," Lex agreed with amazement in his eyes. "Your mom could do this for a living if she wanted."

"Don't tell your dad that," Clark walked over to the sofa. "It's all she can do keeping up with the demands of being Lionel's personal assistant with out adding 'official office decorator' to her job description."

Lex turned just in time to see Clark lower himself into the over sized couch. "You're mom still works for my dad?"

"Of course," Clark spread his lanky body wide across the furniture. "My dad keeps asking her to quit because he says it's lonely around here during the day with out her, but my mom won't hear of it," he said. "She loves her Luthor Corps job and won't give it up without a fight."

The idea of Martha still working for Lionel made Lex's stomach jump again like when he first saw Julian. Was this another of his 'out of place' moments? They seemed to be coming so quickly, that even he did not know for sure.

"Lex," Clark called again from the sofa. "What is going on with you today?"

Walking over to the couch, Lex looked down at his friend. "I don't know, Clark. Everything seems so strange to me again."

"Maybe if you talk about what you are feeling, it might help you to work it out in your head," Clark said as Lex slipped down next to him. "Mom says that if people only took the time to listen to themselves from time to time, the right foot might actually know what the left foot is doing."

Lex gave him a rye look.

"I know," Clark tossed his hands up. "My dad is better at the metaphors than mom."

The room seemed very serious again for a minute as Lex tried to work out the fog in his head with his words. "I wish I could explain it, Clark. I just seem so out of place."

"But how, Lex?"

Thinking for a minute, "I know that everything is right like you and I being here together for the annual Kent's Christmas Eve dinner. We've had one ever since our car crash two years ago, but it's like either something or someone is missing," he stopped for a minute and then looked into Clark's face. "Or maybe that someone is here who shouldn't be."

"How can that be, Lex?" Clark asked. "Our families are here like they have been every year, and even Pete and the girls."

"Ryan?" Lex questioned.

"This is his second year since we adopted him," Clark reminded him. "The only change is Whitney is gone, but he was gone last year too."

"Oh, yeah," Lex looked away with a sense of sadness. "Whitney."

"Come on, Lex," Clark reached across and placed a hand on his shoulder. "It's Christmas and you just got out of the hospital, so try to enjoy it."

A small spark seemed to light up in Lex's head as he looked over at the tree. "Hospital?" The music grew almost haunting as he stood up again. His steps over to the tree were slow and deliberate, but the lights and tinsel seemed to shimmer more brightly with every approaching step. "I was in the hospital." He spoke softly.

"Yeah, Lex," Clark sat forward on his seat. "You were real sick for a while, and to be honest, you had me worried about weather you would ever make it out of there."

Reaching his hand up, Lex touched the small crystal angel that reflected the colors of the multi-textured lights around it. "I was that sick?"

"Sure," Clark stood up. "You were really out of it when you first went in, and although they wouldn't let me in to see you, your father said that they had to try several different drug treatments before they found one that helped you to get better."

"Drugs?" Lex turned to him. "I don't remember, Clark."

"I guess you wouldn't be able to remember all the drugs in the condition you were in," Clark told him trying all the while to sound comforting. "Like I said, you were out of it for a long while."

"No, Clark," Lex's eyes became large. "I don't remember the whole thing. The hospital, the drugs or even being sick."

The revelation made Clark to squint his eyes. "Are you sure, Lex?"

Lex stared at the angel in his hand again. Even away from the tree, it still seemed to shimmer with the lights. "I swear to you, Clark," he looked up. "I don't remember one thing about it. I can hardly sort through the events of my life before today, right now."

Clark reached his right hand and placed it comfortingly on Lex's left. "I sorry, Lex."

A thought came to Lex's mind as he reached up with his hand and grasped onto Clark's sleeve. "Clark," his tone was soft but demanding. "Why was I in the hospital?"

The question put Clark at an obvious unease. "Come on, Lex," he shifted his weight for a moment. "It's Christmas Eve, why do you want to bring up bad memories if you can't remember them anyway?"

"Clark," Lex became demanding. "Please tell me the truth. If I can't remember why I was there, then it must have been bad for me to black it out and still having problems placing everything around me."

"It's not important, Lex," Clark tried to excuse the topic.

"But is it important," Lex's voice got slightly louder. "It is important to me. This is my life."

The room was deathly silent for a moment as the music was drowned out, and all each could concentrate on was the other. Lex's hand was shaking as he continued to hold fast to his teen friend. This was too important for him to let go, and he was a Luthor after all, and Luthors did not take well to people keeping secrets. Especially when the secrets were concerning his blacked out memories.

Clark's lips parted slightly, and there was no hint of a smile on his face at all as he spoke the words. "You had a break down, Lex." He paused to let it sink in, and then he repeated. "You had a total mental breakdown."

The words actually made Lex stagger back a step as he fought to regain his breath. "I," he stammered. "I had what?"

"Lex," Clark grabbed him with both hands to steady him. "Take it easy. You're okay now. You have to remember some part of the ordeal on some level?"

The wheels in his head were turning, but still no recollection of his stay in a mental ward came to Lex's mind. Something had to be wrong, and that is why everything else seemed so out of place.

Clark led him over to the sofa, and the two of them sat next to each other again. Lex stooped forward as Clark rubbed his back. "Breathe, Lex." He coached. "Everything will be okay."

Wiping his face with his hands, Lex grunted. "How, Clark? I was locked away and I don't even remember being sick."

"It's okay," Clark assured him. "The doctors said that your short term memory would be affected, maybe even wiped out for a while. It is expected and not the end of the world."

"My world," Lex nearly snapped. "It's my world, and there is a whole piece of it that I don't remember."

"I'm sorry," Clark, continued to try and comfort him. "I'm sure it is hard not remembering, but its all over now, and maybe it is better that you don't remember all the details."

"I don't remember any details," Lex corrected. "The things that they could have done to me while I was out of it."

"Don't think about that, Lex," Clark almost pleaded. "Can't it be enough that you are home again, and we are having this perfect Christmas?"

The hurt and desperation lingered in Clark's eyes when Lex looked back. He turned away and buried his face in his hands. "How long?"

Clark's hand stopped moving across his back as he pondered telling the answer.

After a few seconds, Lex looked back over his shoulder. "Please, Clark."

"Just over a month, Lex," He replied with grief. "They released you just a few days ago and said that you might be losing some of your short term memories for a few more weeks as time goes on."

Lex slumped back and leaned his head against the back of the couch. "Oh, my God, Clark. I've lost a whole month of time and who knows how much more I can't remember."

"Lex," Clark leaned back next to him crossing his arms. "Try not to think too much about it. Nothing you can do will bring any of that time or memories back."

Letting his head fall to the left, Lex looked over at Clark. "How bad was I?"

Clark studied the ceiling for a moment. "I'm not sure I can help you with that," he replied. "They wouldn't let me visit with you very much, and when I did, it was usually a few minutes at the time while you were for the most part, unresponsive."

"I'm sure," Lex thought about it. "I'm sure that just knowing you were around, even if I was not aware of it, was helpful to me on some level."

"I hope so," Clark agreed with a nod. "You know I always try to be there for you when ever I can."

"You're a good friend," Lex grinned. "But then again, I'm a loony tune, so what do I know."

"Lex," Clark slapped his forehead with laughter.

The levity was dying down when Lana Lang entered the room. She was holding up a letter and a small white box. "Clark," she called out to him slipping into the vacant spot to his left. "Look what I got in the mail today."

Lex leaned in as he saw a silver chain with a large piece of a green gem dangling on the end. "Wow," he commented. "Some one must really like you to foot the bill for that rock."

"It's from Whitney," She announced handing it to Clark. "Help me put it on."

"Sure," Clark grinned as she turned away and pulled up her long dark hair.

"Whitney?" Lex questioned. "How could Whitney send you such a nice gift?"

"Oh, come on, Lex," Lana turned back and admired the jewelry. "Whitney knows Clark and I are an item now, but we are still good friends and write back and fort all the time."

"Yeah," Clark added. "We've even shared a few joke e-mails with each other over the last year."

"But Whitney," Lex started.

"Oh," Lana interrupted. "He wanted me to tell you that he was reassigned and is now stationed at one of the royal palaces over in Iraq." She spoke to Clark as Lex listened on. "He said it is one of the best duties he has had since he got to the Middle East. He's away from all the real danger for the most part."

"Well! Thank goodness for that," Clark hugged her. "I'd hate for something to happen to Whitney now that he and I have become friends."

"Wait a minute," Lex spoke up not able to hold his peace anymore. "Whitney Fordman is living over in Iraq?"

"Yeah," Lana and Clark said at the same time.

That strange feeling overcame Lex and he had to jump up off the sofa. His stomach was churning like never before, and every fibber of his body was sounding off one type of alarm or other. He made his way back over to the tree and held up the angel in his hand again. Along the way, the angel had shattered and only shards of glass remained in his hand.

"Lex," Clark was at his side in a flash and held up the blood cover arm. "My God, are you okay?"

"I'll get a cloth and the first aid kit," Lana said as she rushed from the room.

"Lex," Clark shook his friend slightly. "What's wrong, are you okay?"

A look of horror was on Lex's face as he turned slightly towards Clark.

"What, Lex?" Clark tried to get him to speak. "What is it?"

"Something is very wrong, Clark," Lex finally spoke. "Something is very out of place, and I think I know what is it."

Clark tried to get a read on Lex from his facial expressions, but even on a good day, Lex was very difficult, if not unwilling to be read. So he was forced to go along with the ride of his emotions. "What is it?" He asked. "What do you think is out of place?"

Looking down at his second hand, some how the blood had run on that one too, and a stream of the red fluid covered the sweater over his chest and stomach.

"Oh, dear God," Lex heard his father's voice ring through his head, but it was only he and Clark in the room. "Get some help."

"Lex," Clark grabbed his friend to steady him. "What is it? What is going on?"

"Whitney," Lex said about two inches from Clark's face. "Whitney Fordman is what's wrong."

"Whitney?" Clark repeated. "What is wrong with Whitney?'

"The letter," Lex added. "Whitney couldn't be writing to Lana or even you. It is impossible, and that much I know is true."

"Why, Lex?" Clark felt as if he were digging through a haystack for a needle, but in Lex's head, getting the answers he needed to obtain were done in about the same manner.

"Lex?" Clark shook him again. "Why is it impossible for Whitney to write to us?"

The thought took a few seconds for Lex to process, but he knew the answer was there and he knew he needed to search deep for it. After a short while, his face went completely white and his hands shook as he grasped at Clark's shirt smearing blood everywhere.

"He," Lex's voice croaked. "He's dead, Clark. Whitney Fordman died about a year ago. He was killed on the battlefield."

"Lex," Clark's eyes seemed to mist up. "Get a hold of yourself, buddy. Whitney is fine."

"No, Clark," Lex buried his face in Clark's shirt. "He's dead." He turned his head and leaned against Clark's body. "They're all dead, Clark."

The weeping and gnashing of his teeth tugged hard at Clark's heart as they both slumped to the floor. The pool of Lex's blood seemed to encircle them next to the glow of the Christmas Tree lights, and in the distance, Bing Crosby's 'White Christmas' played on.

To Be Continued

Thanks for the reviews so far, and look for chapter three December 22,2004 and the final Chapter on December 23,2004. Please enjoy and let me know what you think.