PART THIRTY TWO

Ode to Farewells

Hermione shoved her hands into her robe pockets and bit her lip, as she, Harry, and Ron made their way down the school grounds from the castle in that fine, June morning. All the other students from third to seventh year were milling about here and there, buzzing with excitement, relief, and enthusiasm. There were no worries in their heads as the exams had ended the day before, and all students were now prepping themselves up for another day of chattering, eating, and simply chilling out at Hogsmeade. Everyone seemed to be carefree.

Everyone except Hermione, that is.

Her eyes darted back and forth, scanning the grounds filled with the hustle and bustle of the hyperactive students. Somehow, she couldn't find that familiar bob of blond hair she knew oh-so-well.

Finally, after realizing he must have stayed behind in the Slytherin dungeons, she sighed and looked at Harry and Ron, who were both very quiet ever since they met up with her in the common room. She realized that they both had preoccupied looks on their faces as well.

And then, when Hermione was just about to say something, Harry looked up and said suddenly, "I've forgotten something, guys…I'll…catch up with you later." And just like that, he sped off without even waiting for an answer.

When Ron didn't say anything but instead continued to walk down to where the carriages were, Hermione made up her mind. She nudged Ron and said, "I'll be right back, too. I'm sorry, Ron."

Where are you? Harry mused, craning his neck and straining to see amidst the sea of blue robe collars the face he wanted to see. And when he was just about to give up and go back to his two best friends, he saw her, standing in front of one of the carriages, chatting animatedly with her friends—Cho, the love of his life.

He made his way to her in an instant, and when Cho's friends saw him approaching, they all stopped talking and turned to him, making Cho do the same.

"Cho?" he said the moment he reached her. "Can I…have a moment…?"

All of Cho's friends giggled as Cho smiled and said, "Okay."

He led her away from her friends and from everyone else, and when they were finally alone, he suddenly felt like they were back in fourth grade again, back when he couldn't even muster the courage to ask her to the Yule Ball properly. What had just happened right now was exactly the way it had happened back then, complete with giggly girls…a flattered Cho…

…and a very nervous Harry.

Except that now, Cho was his girlfriend, and excusing her from her friends didn't seem too weird anymore or too embarrassing either…plus he was nervous for a different reason.

Cho peeked worriedly at Harry's face, cupped his cheek, and said, "What's wrong, Harry?"

Harry kept silent, listening to the chirping of the birds and the soft breeze that swept by, adding up to the sounds the distant chatter of the students was making. He looked at the Whomping Willow in the distance, then at Hagrid's hut, and at the edge of the Forbidden Forest. So many things had happened for the past seven years…so many things…

"I'm worried," Harry said in almost a whisper, deciding to get straight to the point.

Cho removed her gentle hand from his cheek and looked at him curiously. "Worried…? About what…?"

Harry looked down. He knew he couldn't tell Cho everything that he, Ron and Hermione knew…of the visions and premonitions…the warnings and the signs…the letter…the conclusions fast forming in his mind…the theories he had in explaining the things he couldn't understand…Malfoy…Hermione…Voldemort…the people around him…the new power that would rise again…

"The end of the year…" he replied slowly. "In all my years at Hogwarts, something is always happening at the end of the year…Mysteries, danger, answers to questions I never even knew I had…my parents…who I really am…" He looked up at her, and Cho could almost see the fear in his eyes. "The year is ending…and I still have questions, Cho…something's bound to happen, and I don't know if I can make it through anymore without having to involve you or anyone else…I don't want anything to happen…I don't want anything to change…but there's nothing I can do…promise me that when something happens, you'll stay as far away from me as you can…"

Cho immediately felt her eyes welling up, but she smiled sweetly at Harry, and then looked out over the fields, and sat down on the grass. "Have I ever told you about our Dark Arts final exam when I was in Beauxbatons, Harry…?"

Harry sat down on the grass beside her and took her hand. "No, you haven't…"

Cho smiled at him and then looked at the fields again. "It was my turn to take the individual test…I was to venture out into the unknown, through the swamps there, very similar to the Forbidden Forest here at Hogwarts. I was armed with only my wand, and making it through that swamp meant passing the test. I was getting along fine, but then a Kelpie came and got me."

Harry almost choked. "What?"

Cho felt him hold her hand tighter, but she didn't look at him. "It only took a few minutes for me to start losing consciousness, and as I was pulled deeper and deeper down the water, my defenses fading and my eyesight blurring away…there was only one thought that entered my mind…one thought before I succumbed to nothingness and the professor came after me."

Harry looked down and winced. He knew whose name she was going to say next, and he didn't think he could handle her mentioning Cedric right now. Those were though times…feeling his jealousy long ago and then having it replaced by sadness and anger at Cedric's remorse…because of the same wizard who had killed Harry's parents…

But Harry's thoughts were blocked when she heard Cho's next words. "It was you, Harry."

This time, Harry was startled, watching her as she paused as if to replay the image in her mind.

"You were the only person I thought of…I knew that if you were there, everything would be alright…" She smiled, the distant look in her eyes never fading. "I knew you wouldn't save me for glory or for fame, or to show off any of your remarkable skills…I knew you'd come because you're an idiot," she chuckled. "An idiot who'd risk his life for his friends, because you care so much for them that you'd place yourself in danger for their sake…" She squeezed Harry's hand, and went on. "You're a wonderful person, Harry…there's always something in you, something that shines and battles out every sense of what's wrong…you overcome everything; and year after year, you make it through whatever danger fate curves your way…and no matter how thin and small the ray of hope may be, you always stick to the fight and give it all you've got…because you really are a fool, Harry…"

Finally, Cho turned to look at him, and he saw that she was openly crying now, fresh tears glistening down her cheeks, but still she tried to smile. "But…you're my fool, Harry…and…and if anything ever happens to you…I'm so scared…I don't want to lose the only person who's ever given me hope…I don't want to lose you…"

It was then that Harry wrapped his arms around her and held her tight, letting her sob into his chest. He stroked her hair lovingly and kissed her head, vowing to make sure he returned to her after this was all over.

"That'll never happen, Cho…" he whispered, pushing away all his doubts on what he was saying right now. "That'll never happen…"

Ron took a deep breath and sat down by the edge of the huge lake, staring down at the deep blue waters, his eyes following the ripples that the wind was making on the surface. It was a very memorable lake, where he and Hermione were once taken captives and Harry had to save both of them from the depths of it. It seemed so long ago, when he actually started showing other people signs of his affection for Hermione—Victor Krum very much involved—which had been lingering in the deep recesses of his heart since he first met her.

So many things have changed…he pondered, running his fingers against the cold water and staring at his distorted reflection. Years ago, he wouldn't have openly admitted how he felt for Hermione, channeling his feelings instead to snapping back childish comments at her. Annoyed or not, she would still give him attention, and that was enough for him.

But that was a long time ago.

Now, their seventh year was over, they were graduating, and Hermione had a boyfriend. Harry had Cho, too; hard as it may be to admit, his friends have moved on. And he was willing to move on with them.

He glanced up at the Whomping Willow in the distance, where he and Harry had been stuck in a car and where he'd been taken down to the Shrieking Shack by Sirius.

He looked over at the Quidditch stands where countless events have happened; in Hagrid's hut where solace always seemed to take place; into the Forbidden Forest where he'd reluctantly been to so many times; the greenhouses; the castle; the corridors; the towers; the village.

And as the memories rushed by him like a roll of film, he reached into his robe pockets and brought out the proof of everything he'd been through so far—his journal.

He stared at it for a while, reflecting on everything he'd written on it, particularly everything about Hermione. He loved her for so long and so much, it seemed really unreasonable now to convince himself he was finally over her. After all those years, how could he just let her go with a snap?

He sighed dejectedly, wishing impossibly that he'd never fallen in love with her in the first place. It was a very stupid thing to do, falling for his best friend. He should have known it would never work out from the start; he should have known it would only hurt him in the end.

And it did. It hurt like hell.

Seeing her with somebody else…being with her but not being able to show his affection for her…loving her but not being loved back…denying his emotions but not being able to convince himself to truly let her go…

But still, it was too late; there was no point dwelling on the "should haves". The damage was done. He knew he brought this down upon himself, and he was just going to have to deal with it. His friends have grown up; he had grown up. And if he had to run his heart over to do what he must, then he would. She was happy. She was at peace. She needed to be set free.

With another sigh, Ron straightened himself and stood up. He clutched his journal, staring at it one last time. And then, with all the strength he could muster, he raised his arm and flung the notebook as far as he could towards the lake. And, as it neared the surface of the water, a giant tentacle swooped up and caught the journal, taking it down to the depths of the lake with it.

"Guess you're not sick anymore, huh," Ron mumbled amusedly, still staring at the spot where the tentacle had appeared. He grinned and turned around, leaving the heavy feeling in his heart that'd been tugging for years, behind.

Finally, after a long, long time, he felt so much better.

Okay, Hermione rubbed her hands together, taking a deep breath. Let's hope my intuitions are right. She looked around her to check if anyone was around, and when she was finally convinced that she was alone, she cleared her throat. "Nickel Knacks."

Her face lit up the moment she stepped inside the study, spotting Malfoy standing there with his back to her, his hands in his pockets, staring at the crackling fire in the hearth. She smiled to herself and approached him.

"Draco...?" she said uncertainly when she reached him, wondering if he was still mad about what happened the day before. "Look, I'm really sorry about—"

"It's okay," Malfoy broke her in. "It's not your fault."

Hermione blinked, sensing the weird tone of his voice. Somehow, he seemed so distant…so…down…too sad for words. She began to reach out to touch his shoulder, but he slowly turned around, and Hermione's thoughts were confirmed. He had on a look of total melancholy, one that was even worse than what she'd seen on his face when Dumbledore announced his family's death. He looked like all the world's troubles were on his shoulders, and that he was too helpless to do anything about it.

"Draco…?" she said again. "Is everything…alright…?"

"Yeah…" he replied, smiling at her. But even so, he still looked burdened. "Hey, I'm sorry for lashing out at Weasley last night. I really shouldn't have jumped to conclusions…it's just that I love you so much and I—" he stopped himself. "Sorry for being the stupid, immature, jealous jerk that I am."

Hermione smiled and stepped closer to him, rubbing her fingers gently on his cheek. "Hey…I came here to apologize to you, not the other way around. I'm the bloody bloke who should've turned my best friend down a long time ago, loud and clear. I'm the one who should've kept a little distance from Ron last night. I came to tell you I'm sorry…and that I completely understand how you felt and why you reacted that way...what with the pain of your father's loss and all…" her eyes softened. "I'm really flattered that you tried to fight for me again…even though this time, it was a little too harsh," she smiled.

Malfoy looked down, and Hermione's smile faded. She could see that he was clearly not in the mood for jokes, or for even just a smile for that matter. She stopped stroking his cheek and ran her index finger on his lower lip instead. This made him look back at her. "I'm so sorry about your father, Draco…I know this is all too hard for you…and god…I wish there was something I could do to take away your pain…take it all away for you…"

Malfoy's eyes lingered on hers for a while, and for a moment there Hermione swore she could almost see fear in his eyes. She could've sworn his lips quivered, and all the vulnerability in the world rushed into his soul. But whether it was just her imagination or not, she never knew, because in a split second Malfoy's face had started leaning closer to hers, and she took this opportunity to close her eyes and meet him halfway, kissing him passionately.

She pressed herself against his body, her hands roaming down to his collar and undoing a few buttons, so that she could run her fingers against his chest. A few moments later, she moaned, enjoying how he was plunging his tongue deeper into her mouth, but then she realized that that was all he was planning to do. He never even uttered a sound, and his hands never left his pockets.

When he gently broke the kiss a few minutes later, Hermione removed her hands from his chest and looked at him worriedly. "Is—"

"Everything's fine, Hermione…" Malfoy whispered to her, smiling sadly. "I appreciate your concern, but everything's okay...you don't have to worry about a thing…"

Hermione kept her gaze on his lonely face, searching into the depths of his eyes for the answer she was looking for, but she couldn't seem to find it.

Seeing as she still wasn't convinced, Malfoy added, "Listen, you go on ahead to Hogsmeade, okay? I'll catch up with you at the Three Broomsticks."

Hermione bit her lip. "Promise…?"

Malfoy smiled again. "I promise."

Hermione smiled. "Okay." She took a step back and started to button his robe back again. When she was done, she looked up to see Malfoy looking affectionately at her. "I love you," he said softly.

And it tore Hermione's heart so much, because his words were exactly the way he had said it the day before he left for the Malfoy Manor during the holidays. Whether she liked it or not, she knew something was wrong…and Malfoy wasn't planning on telling her about it.

But still, she thought over everything that had happened, and decided to leave it all up to him this time, hoping against hope that it will all turn out right in the end.

She pushed all her fears aside and grinned at him. "Don't be late," she winked, and turned to leave.

The moment she stepped out of the study, she knew she couldn't bear to part from him again. All at once she remembered the locket he'd given her, the locket she'd stored away and never thought she'd take out again. Her spirits slightly lifted now, she dashed to the Gryffindor Tower, knowing that she would never have to miss him again as long as she had his locket.

Unknown to her, back at the study, a very distraught Malfoy sighed helplessly, finally removing his hands from his pockets, revealing a letter which he'd crushed in his hand earlier before Hermione had come. His eyes went over the contents of the message again, cursing himself for even hoping that this day wouldn't come.

But now it had, and he had nothing to do but obey what the letter was telling him to do.

The year was coming to an end, and I truly was worried—worried about Cho, about Ron's feelings, about my premonitions, about Malfoy, about the Dark Lord…and most of all, I was worried about Hermione—little did she know that after her conversation with Malfoy in the study that day, it was the last time she would ever see him again.

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

Hey you guys!!! I was a little late in updating because I'm currently experiencing homework hell (with bonus exam hell , project hell, and teacher hell because I'm always late for class:D), and to top it all off, I'm experiencing the dreaded, the most horrible, the most terrible, and the worst possible kind of hell of all, WRITER'S BLOCK!!! I hope and pray that this phase of mine will be over soon. I need some inspiration, and fast!!! Hopefully this chappie hasn't been tainted with too much writer's block germs yet…I hope it's not too awful or anything…aaah I have to get this writer's block out of my system!!!

But thanks very very much guys!!! You've somehow helped me finish this chappie even through writer's block!!! What will I ever do without you all??? Mwah!!! Mwah!!!! Mwah!!!!! Please stick around!!! I'll get over this phase, I promise!!!!!!! See you in the next installment!!! :D