Disclaimer: "Now what does this card look like?" asks the shrink

"Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by me!"

"Now what does this one look like?"

"Me getting awards for my book!"

"###, you have made the least progress of any of my patients." disappointed sounding shrink.

"I wouldn't be here if the postal service didn't lose the transcript!" I shout standing up.

"Calm down!"

"No I won't! I'm not crazy! I will-", I am cut off by the tranquilizer shot.

Author's Note: Ms. Groves is modeled by someone I know. Coach Johnson is modeled by someone my, only inspirational, friend knows. And Remus is still property of J.K. Rowling.

Alexandra

(a whole day is devoted to each class and there is no such thing as breaks)

1st day of school in Ms. Grove's class

"You have your work. Examples and directions are in the packet. No talking, questions or getting out of your seat. Get to work. You will not finish this packet any time today. Go!" said they're ticked off sounding math teacher on her way back to math from lunch she noticed people going into the Remedial Magic classroom. "Crud", she thought watching this", they'd found someone. (Remedial magic deals with History of Magic. Care for magical creatures. Potions. Etc)

2nd day of school in Coach Johnson's class

"Hello class, for those of you who don't know me I am Coach Johnson. Good now that introductions are over, I want you all to sign this petition against prayer in this school. This is for a daily grade.

"What has this got to do with English?"

"Nothing whatsoever, please sign here"

"You can't take this as a daily grade, it's against school policy to grade-"

"Policies, laws! It's all hogwash! Don't believe in any of it! That's why we-"

"We?"

"Yes we! That is why we are going to overthrow our useless government!"

"Does that mean we get to kill Umbridge?"

"Yes! Yes!" he runs off to get battle plans from under his bed.

3rd day of school in Lupin's class.

She walked inside the classroom and found her hobo-ish teacher. He was a very cheerful hobo and insisted on shaking her and her two classmate's hands. Shaking her head sadly at him she walked around the big hole and to her desk. (slashed couch) He was nice, cheerful, and funny. When she went to lunch she sat next to some people taking bets on how long he'd last.

Remus

As soon as he'd pressed the tape to the door he fell forward. (the door does not shut properly) Standing up he turned and faced a small redheaded boy. He shook the boys hand as he did the other who turned up 2seconds later.

"I'm the last one"

He followed the boy inside and got his first look at his classroom. The optimist in him died gruesomely at the sight of it.

Furniture: A twin bed that has a single mattress with worn metal springs and a moth eaten comforter: a slashed couch and two folding chairs: The teacher's desk is a coffee table: Room description: A hole in front of the couch: No windows: Door that does not shut correctly, nor does it lock

Alexandra

She walked past a still-cheerful-Lupin to Johnson's class, cursing him mentally for making her lose the bet.

The guy had been persistent in his efforts to

Be cheerful, funny, and witty 24 hours a day

Teach them everything they could learn about the magical world

He wasn't doing too badly for a guy doomed from the start. Everyone enjoyed his classes. He made up for Johnson's horrible English class by reading aloud muggle books, simply because they carried mentionings of dragons or unicorns or something. Crud her internal monologue was making her late for Johnson's horrible English class. So, sincerely wishing to be at Lupin's she rushed into Johnson's class.

"Alright class, Pop Quiz"

Groans

"Alexandra! What did the door symbolize in the Scarlet Letter?"

"Um, way of entry-"

"No!" he bellowed as he slammed his fist on his poorly constructed desk," Religious Oppression!" Johnson says as he walks to the board. "Sen, what does the tree represent", he asks while writing Religious Oppression.

"What tree?"

"The tree represents our rotting government!" he says as he writes rotting government on the board. "Did you guys even read the book?"

They nod.

"Well, you didn't absorb it well. You all fail the quiz. Now what were we doing when we last met"

"Going over battle plans"

He rushes off to get blueprints and spends the whole day explaining. Poor sap, they only got him riled up for entertainment. It almost compensated for the failing grades.