Memento [Part Sixteen]
The gym was a good place to vent anger. At least, that was what he was told. In truth, the workout was not helping him much. It was probably Heero's presence not a few feet away that must have caused the anxiety. It didn't help much either that he wasn't alone. If only they'd leave him alone for a few hours...
"No. This is a team effort Wu," he heard Duo's whisper from the swimming pool not far from the bench press he was stationed at. "But you know, I don't think I'd take it against him if he really wanted to snap Heero's neck."
"You may be right," Wufei answered. "…even if it is such a disgraceful act."
Trowa could almost imagine Wufei's defeated look of acquiesce as he agreed with Duo. He had to evaluate what they just said. Disgraceful, huh? Maybe a couple of hours ago he would have thought it disgraceful. Unfortunately, the person he was a few hours ago was not agreeing with the person he was now. What made matters worse was that Heero was not trying to avoid him. Instead of ensuring his safety by staying away as far as possible, the man deliberately followed him around. Heero did not say a word, but he was still letting his presence be known in different ways. He was hovering around him. It was enough of a safety hazard for Heero that Duo and Wufei were forced to follow them around. Now, instead of being left alone in peace, he was followed around by a suicidal Heero and his two preventive friends who were surely not going to leave any time soon.
"I'm scared," he heard Duo whisper to his current partner.
Wufei was surprisingly cautious. He had yet to attempt reconciling them. He was quiet as if he didn't know what to do. Then again, he may have been unable to come up with a plausible solution.
"We should let them fight it out."
Trowa turned his head toward the direction of the pool, confused as to what Wufei had just suggested. He knew the two would have guessed by now that he was hearing everything they were saying and he was curious to find out exactly what Wufei had in mind. He did come up with such clever solutions to problems even if his way of doing things tended to get out of hand.
"Are you crazy? I was just kidding when I said it the first time," Duo said immediately. It was obvious enough that he would react that way, being used to Quatre's pacifist solutions. Truth be told, being around Quatre all those years taught Duo how to solve disputes in a more sociable and pleasant manner.
Heero may have heard the incredulous statement but he did not make a move to acknowledge that he'd heard. Trowa knew better than to react and continued to keep quiet as well. The heavy weight he was in the process of lifting was enough to keep his attention on the task at hand. At least bench pressing served as a momentary distraction for him.
"I mean it," Wufei said while shushing Duo. It was as if they weren't loud enough already. "We can't work efficiently when tension is building up within the team," he explained.
He heard a bit of splashing as if the two had finally decided to do laps in the pool. Only, when he looked back, Trowa noticed that Duo was submerging Wufei's head under the water. It was enough to make Wufei fight back in annoyance and squeeze Duo's throat threateningly hard.
Duo sputtered and for once in the past few hours, the unusually agreeable pair finally showed their true colors. By the time Trowa reached the pool, the two were already exchanging deadly threats. Heero also noticed and was not far behind.
"Ack! Were you trying to kill me?" Duo asked, looking furious while rubbing his throat.
Trowa knew that they would snap eventually. All the while they were worrying that he would start a brawl with Heero when it was the two of them who were going to go at it. The two never did learn how to be diplomatic when around each other. It was only a matter of time until they were going to have another petty fight.
"Of course I was!" Wufei answered with as much vigor as Duo. "You were trying to drown me so I thought it necessary, if not proper, to extract my revenge by killing you."
"Damn it! You're such a war freak, you know that. No wonder you suggest solving everything with the fist first," Duo countered while tugging hard on his comrade's dark hair.
"Let go of me you imbecile!"
"Savage!"
Trowa watched them, fascinated with the fight for a reason he could not understand. Watching all the veins on Wufei's head appear, he imagined what it would be like to have a genuine fight that involved shameless displays and childish retorts. He wondered what the relief would be like after letting go of whatever it was he had bottled up inside. The call of such a fierce battle was too strong.
He looked behind him to confirm if Heero felt the same way. The man looked jealous of the two fighting lunatics. It was strange when he realized that he was also jealous.
"You can't solve everything by beating the shit out of someone, idiot!" Duo screamed this time as he landed a satisfying blow on Wufei's jaw.
"I don't see how you think that," Wufei responded with a smirk. He rubbed the injured jaw with the back of his hand and backed away a bit. "Are you telling me that punching my face wasn't as gratifying as it was violent?"
"Of course it was!" Duo answered with a growl. "And I'd feel a lot better if I got to do it again," he added, rubbing his fist and looking ready to attack once again.
"Then you've just agreed with me," Wufei answered simply and rather smugly.
"Eh?" Duo said. The intensity of his earlier conviction was gone, only to be replaced with mild curiosity. "What are you talking about, smartass?"
"If you and I can brawl like uncivilized gorillas and feel good after doing so then why can't those other two idiots benefit from it as well?"
Duo rubbed his fingers under his chin, looking interested in Wufei's argument. Trowa was also interested even if he didn't give any indication of it.
"That's a rather strange way of putting it," Duo agreed. He placed his arms over the side of the pool and addressed his two spectators. Trowa already knew what they were thinking.
"Think of it this way," Wufei said, getting out of the pool and reaching for his towel. "We need to move on with the investigation and unless we work as a trusting unit, we can't move forward. I know Quatre would most likely oppose my proposed method, but he isn't here now. We should rely on the options we have available. If anyone has a more plausible solution to our problem, speak now."
Trowa did not oppose the suggestion and was in fact looking forward to it. He was reluctant to involve himself in a fight that would reveal the somewhat foolish reasoning he had spurned from hate. However, he knew that being honest was necessary to allow all of them to move on. They had already accepted the evidences concerning Quatre's whereabouts, but they had yet to evaluate them. Without being able to rely on each other with full conviction, they would be unable to separate the hard facts from the emotions. They needed to fight. It was as simple as that.
"I agree," Heero said after keeping his mouth shut for some time.
"Then what are you waiting for?" Duo said with a bizarre hint of enthusiasm. He left the pool as Wufei did earlier and grabbed the first towel he could find. Quickly toweling himself down, he sat down next to Wufei on a bench nearby and watched them expectantly.
"You didn't tell me," Trowa said calmly, refusing to start it out with a fist fight. First, he needed to know Heero's reasons for keeping vital information from him and then he could land a long-awaited punch on his comrade's gut.
"I tried to," Heero answered him.
Trowa whirled around to face him. His former aloofness was replaced with seething fury.
"And when was that?" he hissed. The green depths of his eyes were conveying the undeniable emotions he felt as he said it.
Despite the obvious resentment being directed at him, Heero remained calm.
"Before we met Quatre's new character in the interrogation room, I told you that I had a strange feeling. I said that I was going to tell you about it over dinner that night."
"What stopped you?" Trowa inquired, looking away from him. It was no use acting out of emotion when the person on the receiving end was taking it in diplomatically. He knew it was a powerful weapon, but he never realized it until it was used against him. There was no point losing to something he normally had complete control over. Trying to compose himself, Trowa let out a loud sigh.
"I wanted to find out if it really was him," Heero said. "I was almost certain that it was him, but after seeing the way he looked at you, I couldn't go through with it."
Trowa closed his eyes and felt the tension seep out of him. He needed Heero to elaborate his point.
Sitting on the closest bench available, he looked up at Heero's still standing form and without saying a word, urged him to go on with the explanation. Words were no longer necessary between them. It was a subtle form of team work that the two of them had grown accustomed to over the years.
"He didn't know who you were," Heero continued. "The look you had when you found out... it was the same look Quatre had many years ago after he realized that he'd blown you up together with the Vayeate. He looked hurt that you didn't know who he was. I wasn't stupid enough not to notice that you had the same look when you saw him in the interrogation room. You wanted him to recognize you. I didn't want you hurt because I made a promise with him three years ago that I'd take care of you."
None of them made a move to counter Heero's lengthy statement. Even Trowa did not dare speak. Slowly, the pieces were coming together. There was, however, the matter of their encounters with the replicate Quatre several times after. It was an issue that needed to be addressed.
"We were with him for so long. Why didn't you tell us after?" Duo asked. Trowa was relieved that the questions he had were shared by his other friends.
"I had my doubts," Heero responded, taking a seat as well. By doing so, the tension in the room went down tenfold. He no longer looked like he was being cross-examined by ravenous beasts. He was just another friend sharing the same concerns they had. It was always comforting to know. They were a team after all.
"After a while," Heero said, leaning forward as if to speak more closely to his comrades. "I had my doubts about whether it really was him or someone else. Aside from the way he looked, I couldn't pinpoint any similarities between him and our Quatre. He had a different life, different interests, and different friends. He was too established as someone else to have been someone we were acquainted with."
"I agree," Wufei interrupted. "He could not have possibly recreated himself in the three years he was away. It's almost impossible if not absurd. There would be no reason for him to make himself alien to us."
"I know!" Duo agreed with an eagerness to join in the discussion. "But there were so many clues that said otherwise. It was like he was there without being himself."
"The more important question is," Wufei said. "Why is he sick now? Does being ill have anything to do with the change?"
There was a moment of silence as they thought about the questions being brought up one by one. Trowa was listening, but his interests lay elsewhere. He was still stuck on phase one, still questioning whether the Quatre they had stumbled upon was really his husband.
"How would you know it was him?" Trowa asked aloud and it was clear who the question was directed toward.
"I just do."
"Typical," Trowa said. His confused emotions were still threatening to break open. Without thinking anymore about the consequences of his next question, he asked it out loud. "How come you always know where he's at and how he's feeling? What kind of almighty power do you have?"
Silence reigned once again. True, they had always questioned the strange connection between Quatre and Heero, but nobody dared ask why, much less ask Heero directly.
"I don't know," Heero answered honestly. He looked unperturbed even when it was unmistakable that the real fight was just beginning.
"That answer does nothing for me," Trowa said. He stood up from his seat and positioned himself at the edge of the pool. There he observed the undisturbed water that smelled of chlorine and chemicals.
"Are you jealous?" Heero dared to ask. He sounded indifferent, an indication that he was not trying to goad Trowa on. Nonetheless, it still had the same effect.
Trowa heard a scared yelp from Duo's direction.
"He always knew when you had a headache at three am and yet he couldn't possibly picture what it would be like if I lost him," Trowa answered and faced Heero with as much anger as he could possibly show. "Of course I'm jealous," he yelled. "He could trust you with something this critical but he can't even keep a promise with me."
"There's no need for jealousy," Heero reassured him. "What he and I share will never be as valuable as what the two of you shared. There should be no reason for doubting him, especially not right now."
"Easy for you to say," Trowa said, grabbing a towel and wiping away his sweat. He was leaving. There was no longer any need for him to hear it, their consoling and helpful statements that did nothing but aggravate his anger and magnify his doubts.
"Damn it, Trowa!" he heard Heero shout as he exited the gym area. "He chose to marry you. That should be enough." Unfortunately, he didn't agree with the statement. It still wasn't enough.
The bathroom was empty when he entered, enough that the sound of his footsteps reverberated throughout the large room. It wasn't dark but the sunlight coming in through the windows above his head was not enough. It made the place feel abandoned.
All of a sudden he felt sadness, a deep sadness that left him feeling sorry for himself. He felt empty and was confused because of the sudden change. Only moments ago he was furious; only days ago he felt betrayed. It was only a little while ago when he was sure that he was rational. Now he just felt empty and abandoned just like the bathroom that had barely any lighting inside.
For a moment he contemplated crying, but he realized that he had done enough of it already. Instead of doing so, he stepped into the shower and reveled in the company of silence as he washed away the tension and the worry. He knew it was time to visit Quatre once again. The others had told him that they'd successfully brought him to a hospital. Quatre had mentioned that he was too tired to fight any longer.
Trowa had to wonder if he was hiding something, but didn't have time to contemplate any more when he heard the bathroom door open. He knew that one of them would eventually come for him. At least he had an excuse not to talk any more. He was in the shower after all.
"You have to hear this," Heero said amidst the sound of water hitting the tiled floors.
Trowa nodded although he knew that Heero didn't see him. Based on experience, he knew that Heero would insist on doing what he thought necessary anyway.
"You haven't heard the last communication," Heero continued. "...and neither did the others. I suppose it's about time you heard it from him directly. I'm going to let you hear this if you want to know what really happened without presupposing anything."
Trowa snorted. He didn't believe the sincerity in Heero's voice. It just felt too staged.
"Turn off the shower if you want to hear it," Heero commanded and so he did.
"Good. Now pay close attention to the whole conversation. It might do you some good."
Trowa leaned on the tiled walls of the shower stall and waited for the promised message. When he heard the sound of a button clicking and the winding of tape, he made sure to listen carefully to the voices that came out of the voice recorder.
"Zero-one, hold your position."
It was Quatre's voice. He always headed the operations even when he was part of the conference meeting. He was doing two jobs at once that way. Trowa could not imagine how he could have possibly done both at once.
"Negative. The attack is heading for your direction. It will reach you in a little less than eight minutes," Heero's voice said. What followed was a crackling sound before Quatre's voice came on again.
"I am well aware of that zero-one. Walta has someone aiming for him at three o'clock and Ms. Darlian has one at six. They require assistance. I can take care of myself."
"Don't think I'm going against your authority zero-four, but I have a feeling you're not going to evade."
There was another short pause and the sounds of crackling static.
"Affirmative, zero-one."
"Zero-three will not approve."
"This decision is not for zero-three to make. Do your job zero-one and stop questioning my authority."
"It's reckless and dangerous. My head will be sliced and put on a stake before the day is over."
"Zero-three will do you no harm."
"I beg to differ."
Trowa crossed his arms. Quatre was right. He had yet to hit Heero. It was either he was just waiting for the right time to hit him or Quatre was right in assuming that he would never do such a thing even when he felt like it.
"This is for zero-three, you know." Quatre's voice became softer, almost as if the commanding leader was replaced with the concerned lover.
"How so?" Heero sounded like he was running around a cluster of thick bushes while continuing to talk to Quatre.
"These are the same people stalking him. I'm going to find out who they are and put an end to it."
"Improbable. Without a past, Zero-three is not likely to have enemies."
"Zero-one, sniper at eight o'clock."
A shot could be heard before the conversation continued.
"It's true that zero-three is the least likely to accumulate adversaries from what I gather about his past but this is legitimate. I've noticed surveillance devices around us for quite some time now. Someone is watching him and there's no telling when that someone will strike."
"So you've decided to strike first."
"Affirmative."
"I won't allow it. Change position now. Two unidentified units are closing in on you at T minus 20 seconds. "
"Pay attention to Walta, zero-one. I can handle this myself."
"Zero-two and zero-three will watch out for Walta."
"Negative zero-one. Zero-three's shoelaces are untied. He won't make it in time after he trips and falls on zero-two. I'm leaving it up to you. Take the sniper down before Walta is eliminated."
"Damn it! You have this all figured out, don't you?"
"Do you trust me, zero-one?"
Trowa heard a sigh, a sign of hesitation on Heero's part.
"Of course I do."
"Then leave this to me. Nobody dares mess with my husband, especially not by cowardly watching behind the shadows. Take care of him for me."
"I will."
"That's not a request zero-one. It's an order."
Trowa heard a loud thud before the communication was cut short.