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JAPANESE RAMEN
Chapter 3: Queer Eye for the Shinji Guy/The Red Menace.
By Rion and Seph Khan
An Operation A801 Ordered Production (www.operation-a801.com)
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Shinji aimlessly kicked a rock along the pavement as he and Touji walked towards their respective homes, both lost in their own thoughts and reflections on what had occurred that afternoon. The late evening sun provided just enough light for Shinji to keep track of where his rock went.
Having enough of the silence the taller boy decided to clear the air.
"So what's bothering you then?" asked Touji.
"Huh?" responded a despondent Shinji, who looked up from the ground in the middle of a kick. His sneaker clad foot missed his intended target and skidded along the pavement. Shinji's expression became more downcast if that was possible... he missed his rock.
"You've been kicking that rock since we left NERV man," Touji said, stating the completely obvious.
"It's nothing really," mumbled Shinji.
"Sure it isn't," the jock sarcastically replied, "are you still down about the whole wiener-burning incident?"
Leave it to Touji to dredge up things that should have been left buried. Now Shinji had another reason to feel gloomy. In the great game of depression, he had just scored a hat trick.
"No, but thanks for bringing it back up," Shinji snapped.
"Hey sorry," Touji held his hands up defensively, before suddenly dropping them into a classic thinker pose, "just haven't seen you this down since, since... the Demon!"
"Huh?"
"You're hung up on the demon aren't ya?!" exclaimed Touji, "you sick little..."
"It's not like that!" Shinji said, beginning to blush.
"Then what is it, like ya masochist?" Touji said, pointing his index finger at his startled companion accusingly.
Shinji groaned in frustration. "Stop it. It's about Asuka, but not like you think."
Touji looked at his friend strangely but remained silent. "Go on..."
"Last night we were having dinner and..."
"You made out on the dinner table?! You sick little monkey!" interrupted Touji.
Shinji glared at the pilot of Unit 03 with a gaze more at home on Asuka's face than his normally meek visage.
"Take your mind out of the gutter for five seconds," pleaded Shinji.
"I'll try but I'm not promising anything."
Satisfied, but still dubious about his friend, Shinji continued.
"She was talking about something with Misato, then she demanded my help and I caved."
What Touji said next was the last thing Shinji expected from his 'friend'.
"So? You always cave."
"Weren't you the one yesterday who was trying to get me to stop giving into Asuka?" spluttered Shinji.
Touji scratched his chin in thought.
"Oh yeah. But I crossed my fingers on it."
Shinji was shocked. "Y-you..."
Touji slapped his friend on the back. "But good for you man. You proved me wrong and even if I owe Kensuke 5000 yen, I'm still proud of you. Keep trying though!"
"Have you been listening to anything I've been saying?" Shinji asked, sighing.
They continued along the footpath for a while, but Touji's attentions waned as they approached a street corner. Shinji turned left when he heard footsteps heading away from him.
"Hey, where are you going?" asked Shinji, "you live this way!"
Touji turned and scratched the back of his head.
"Me, oh um I'm just going to draw out some money."
That set off alarms in Shinji's mind. Touji never touched his bank account, he was stingy even on special occasions. Who else would wear the same tracksuit all through high school? He had heard that Mari had been altering that piece of cloth so much it split due to the fabric being stitched and restitched so many times. No piece of fabric is that durable though, as many other athletes discovered during Touji's hurdle trial last year.
"What for?" he asked suspiciously.
"Stuff," replied Touji, a little too quickly.
"O-kay." Shinji said, raising an eyebrow, "I'll see you tomorrow, then?"
"Sure thing. I want a full report on everyone's progress tomorrow!"
"Even yours?"
"Yes, well..." mumbled Touji, "anyway, gotta be off, things to do know!"
He waved and began to briskly walk off down the street, leaving Shinji at the corner really wondering about his friend.
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"Honey, I'm home!" Misato yelled as she entered the apartment. From his place at the kitchen bench preparing their meal for tonight, Shinji blinked.
"Eh?" he replied.
"Okay, maybe a little bit before your time," Misato said, "so, what's for dinner?"
"Chicken Katsu, Shinji style."
"You're cooking chicken?" Asuka asked, yelling out from her room, "make sure it's better than those noodles you cooked last time!"
"Don't worry, I'll do better tonight," he sighed.
"Don't worry Shinji, I'm sure it'll be..." Misato began, before being interrupted by the warking around her feet. Looking down, she stared right into the eyes of her pet penguin, who was trying to tell her something through his warks and the rapid movements of his fins.
"What do you want, PenPen?"
"Wark!"
"A guy with glasses likes me?"
"Wark, Wark!!!"
"What was that? Shinji, did you hear him?"
"I think he said something about 'being a good source of tuna'. At least, that's what I think he said..."
"Wark!!!"
"Slow down boy, I can barely understand you!"
PenPen rushed off into his freezer in annoyance, soon returning with a large piece of paper inbetween his beak. Taking it from him, she saw a badly scrawled stick figure of a man wearing glasses with love hearts above his head.
"Isn't that cute! You drew some Love Hina fanart for me!"
"Stupid Otaku bird!" came Asuka's shrill voice again.
"W...wark!"
"He says that you're not listening..." Shinji began, and quite clearly she wasn't. Ignoring both the boy and the penguin, she walked over to the fridge and stuck up the piece of paper with a Nerv fridge magnet, humming "Sakura Saku" to herself.
"I'm going to get changed into something a little more comfortable. Call out when dinner is ready," Misato said as she headed towards her room.
Shinji and PenPen looked at each other and sighed.
"She's hopeless, isn't she?" he asked rhetorically.
"Wark..."
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To say the Horaki household was a hive of activity was an understatement. It Bustled with activity, with emphasise on the capital 'B'. Each of the girls had their assigned role, which they sped through in order to get to school before the bell. Kodama whistled away as she did the laundry, barely audible under the whine of Nozomi's vacuum cleaner. Both girls went about their tasks with smiles on their faces. They found these morning chores to be peaceful and easy compared to the rest of the hectic school day.
Hikari did not share their enthusiasm today. The dark cloud that hung over her head was so tangible that it nearly rained on her. Knowing that it was no use trying to talk to Hikari while she was in this mood, her sisters left her alone.
Like most of these little dark moments as of late, Touji was to blame. Hikari despaired about what she was going to do with her no-hope lug of a boyfriend.
What had first attracted her to Touji- his compassion, courage and loyalty- where all still there. He hadn't changed from the boy she had given bentos to into some kind of heartless slob. In fact, that was the problem- he hadn't changed at all. He may have been physically seventeen, but he was still as mature as a fourteen-year-old. All the bad traits she had hoped he would have grown out of by now- his loud mouth that ran off without any prior thought, his romance dyslexia and his fully tracksuit filled wardrobe- were all still evident.
She finished Nozomi's bento and reached for her schoolbag. Without a word of parting to her sisters, she left the apartment for another school day. Just as she was leaving though, something caught her eyes as she opened the door. On the welcome doormat, someone had left a single red rose with an attached card.
Hikari sighed. Nozomi or Kodama had another suitor; someone who would take them out to dinner, send roses and do things that didn't involve B grade movie marathons. She picked up the rose, wondering which sister had been lucky enough to woo such a romantic paramour. Looking down at the card, her eyes widened. She rubbed them and looked at the card again. The kanji for "Hikari" had been meticulously written in golden pen on one side.
Turning it over, she saw the message her admirer had left her.
Hikari;
Just a little sign of my appreciation, my sweet...
Hope this rose makes you think of me, like everything else makes me think of you.
You know who...
On closer inspection, 'My sweet' had been written over the partially erased 'Babe'. This killed the mystery behind her secret admirer, but Hikari could not help smiling. Her dark cloud conceded defeat and floated off to pester some other lovelorn teen.
'Maybe not so no-hope after all,' she sighed, content.
As Hikari walked to school, she held the rose and card in her hand so as to remind herself that what she had found on her doorstep was not some sugar- coated dream.
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Shinji walked across the basketball court to the Ball Stealer, the huge tree that served as a fortress of solitude and base of operations for the Three Stooges. Much to his surprise, Touji and Kensuke were there before him. Kensuke sat on a rock outcropping with a clear view of the oval, abandoning the early morning shade. Through his military binoculars, he seemed to be on the lookout for something, anything. The ever-late Touji was also there, the dark rings under his eyes testament to his hatred of getting out of bed early. His groaning was pitiful, but it brought a hint of a smile to Shinji's face.
"So the dead have risen early this morning?" Shinji said.
"I liked you better before you started acting like a smart ass," Touji complained, shading his eyes from the sun even in the Ball Stealer's shade.
"What's the occasion then?"
"The early bird catches the worm. I'll tell you more when we present our progress reports at lunchtime."
'Uh oh,' Shinji thought, alarm bells ringing in his mind.
"So how did the sync tests go? Is the Earth still safe?" Kensuke asked from his rock outcropping, before coughing and spitting out a tooth.
'Damn, that's the second this morning' Kensuke thought. Meanwhile, Touji and Shinji were both beginning to sweatdrop. In some silent consensus, they both decided to change the subject.
"So why exactly are you sitting out there?" Shinji asked, noticing the lost teeth as well as the many bruises. He hoped Kensuke hadn't been caught peeping the in the girl's change rooms again.
"I must maintain watch over the school. The Red Menace could rear its head at any moment, and it is my sworn duty to stop it!"
"Asuka? You can try and stop her, but it's your funeral buddy," Touji laughed.
"No, not Asuka. Communists!" Kensuke said fervently, "although, now that I think about it... Maybe she's an East German spy."
"Kensuke..." Shinji said, always cautious when stopping the military otaku in mid-rant, "Communism in Germany collapsed over a decade before we were born."
"Then maybe the Demon is some kind of sleeper agent."
"Ah, Kensuke? Earth to Kensuke?" Touji said, trying to drag his friend back to reality, "how goes your project?"
"My project?" he said, blinking, "Oh yeah, that."
With one finger, Kensuke pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose in a decidingly Gendou-esque manner and smirked. Shinji shuddered, despite himself.
"To lunchtime, and the secrets that await," Kensuke replied cryptically, the sunlight reflecting of his glasses.
The hairs on the back of Shinji's neck stood up. It seems he... or at least, they were being watched. He turned to look out over the oval and at all the small groups sitting on its ground. A number of girls were looking at the basketball courts, or to be more precise, were looking at Kensuke up on his rock. Seeing that one of the Stooges had caught on, over half of the girls on the oval watching quickly turned away in near synchronisation. It would have been amusing if Shinji hadn't been so profoundly disturbed.
"That reminds me. If any girl comes up to you and asks about me, could you please..." Kensuke trailed off, searching for the right word.
"Lie?" Touji chipped in.
"Exactly," Kensuke said, his conceitful mood only interrupted by the school bell. Sighing in unison, they left the Ball Stealer and headed to their classroom for the start of another school day.
In the bushes, a pair of sinister eyes followed them.
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Shinji made his way through the throng of student crowding the hallways. Touji and Kensuke had headed back to the classroom, but Shinji had decided to get a drink of water now rather than wait for recess. He knew he would get in trouble with Sensei, but all the sweatdropping he had been doing before school had made him dehydrated.
As he passed, he managed to hear snippets of conversations between little cliques as they walked to respective classrooms.
"Did you hear about his flaming eagle tattoo?"
"And that poor girl's name as well as over his heart?"
"I heard he made all his money as a song writer."
'Hmm, guess there's someone else famous at school,' Shinji thought, 'The Paparazzi can stalk someone else for a change.'
"And you believed all that?" said another girl, "Come on, we all know that Kensuke is a secret undercover agent protecting Ikari and Ayanami!"
'Kensuke!?' Shinji thought, stopping in mid step, 'But.... How? How could he get them to believe stuff like this?'
Standing in the middle of the hallway, he was quickly knocked aside by a bunch of fourteen-year-old boys. Shaking his head in disbelief, he headed over to the water fountain and leans down to partake in the blessedly cool water.
'Touji has to be up to something... nothing else would get him up earlier than me. Now there are woman talking about Kensuke without laughing! This can't be good...' Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Shinji headed back to class. If he was lucky, the Sensei's failing prostate had kept the old man in the bathroom longer than usual.
'Not only are they following the pledge, they've also seem to have made some progress. What have I achieved?' he thought, thinking back to his aborted attempt to stand up to Asuka.
"Hey, Lord Ironfist!" a girl shouted, breaking Shinji out of his reverie.
'Oh shoot...' he cringed at the moniker, wishing people would forget but unfortunately knowing better. He turned around to look at Yume Kodeko, a girl in the same year as Shinji but in a different class.
"My name is Shinji" he began, hoping that by standing up to this stranger he might at least have something to tell the guys at lunchtime.
"Yeah, that's nice," Yume said, brushing him off, "you're a friend of Aida's, right?"
"I guess you could say..."
"Well, Reiko and I just wanted to say that we admire his sacrifice."
'Reiko? Sacrifice?' Shinji thought. The only Reiko that he knew was the Head Girl, Reiko Tatomi. He saw in the hallways every now and then, as well as having heard her speak during assemblies.
"And Reiko was just wondering... could you ask him... once he's finished mourning of course... if he would be interested in going out sometime?"
"Going out? What are you talking about?"
"Please! Could you please pass it onto him?"
"Ah sure, I guess..."
"Great! Thanks Tetsuoken!" she cried out as she ran back to class, leaving a very perplexed Shinji to scratch his head in disbelief.
'I've really got to have a talk with that boy...' Shinji told himself and started to wonder if he needed a name badge. Despite his pilot status, leave it to the ignorant peoples of the world to forget who did all the hard yards.
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As Shinji stood in the hallway and clenched his fists, Touji was leaning over his desk talking to Kensuke.
"So what's with all those bruises? Did you get into a fight with those vicious thirteen year olds punks again?"
"I'm telling you, it was..." Kensuke began, before clamping his hands over his mouth. Looking around hurriedly to see if anyone suspicious was paying attention to them, Kensuke leaned over and whispered, "communists." "Really..." Touji said, deadpan.
"I swear it's true! They were Communists, nude Communists!"
"This is sounding more and more like one of your sexual fantasies, but you've gained my interest."
"Their ringleader is that guy Hikari hangs out with. I think his name is Jun or something!"
"Jun?" Touji said, cracking his knuckles and smiling wickedly, "now you really have my attention."
"I know I should be concentrating on our pledge, but I can't sit on my hands and do nothing!"
"Well..." Touji said, trying to think of some advice to give his friend. Luckily, Sensei Nozo Abe finally decided to make an appearance in his classroom. Hikari buried the rose in her open schoolbag and begin the "Stand and Bow" routine.
"So where did you find these political agitators?" Touji asked as they sat down again. Sensei began droning away in the background, not that either of them cared much.
"Well, I had just finished setting a diversion on the school network so that the system admin would be..."
"Rei Ayanami, please report to the Principal's office immediately," came a strident voice over the school's PA system. Everyone turned around to look at Rei, who blinked in surprise. She quickly regained her calm outward demeanour and left the room without further prompting.
"What was that all about?" Kensuke asked, "Do you think...?"
Touji had pulled out his mobile phone which, after a few breathless moments of anticipation, did not ring.
"Nope, not another Angel" Touji said, sighing in relief.
"Then what could they possibly want with Rei?"
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Happily situated in their private spot, Touji clapped his hand together and looked at his assembled party that consisted of Shinji and Kensuke sitting on the grass with their lunches spread before them.
"The first of the daily progress reports on 'Operation Bone a Girl' will begin shortly. But first, any other business?"
Shinji looked at the taller boy in confusion. "When was this whole endeavour given a title? More to the point, why is it called 'Operation Bone a Girl'?"
"I like the 'Operation' part of the title," added Kensuke.
Touji nodded in the direction of the bespectacled boy. "I thought you might."
"That's not the part I have the problem with," argued Shinji.
"Well it's accurate, isn't it?" asked Touji.
"That's not the point either."
"How about 'Operation Bang a Babe'?" interjected Kensuke.
"Not bad..." Touji said, scratching his chin.
Shinji was shocked. "NO!"
Crossing his arms in frustration, Touji looked at the pilot. "Well, if you're the title police, why don't you come up with one?"
Taking a moment, Shinji bowed his head in thought and then the answer came. "'Operation Coming of Age'"
The athlete's eyes narrowed. "Fine, the title doesn't matter anyway. Kensuke, your report, if you please."
Kensuke cracked his knuckles. "With pleasure."
"Hi Kensuke!" came a chirpy female voice, throwing the boys into confusion.
They all turned to see a cute girl with long black hair walk past, smiling at Kensuke who in turn smiled back with an eerie coolness unbecoming of him.
"We have a security breach. How could this have happened?!" cried Touji.
"Because we're underneath a tree in a common area? Our 'Security Officer' is a little preoccupied?" offered Shinji.
"Point noted, Waterboy Ikari."
"Don't call me that."
"It's your official position."
Sighing, Shinji finally relented. "Fine."
Happy with his victory, Touji turned back to the sandy-haired boy. "Anyway, you were saying, Kensuke?"
"She's okay, guys. From a respectable bourgeoisie family, not a threat," said Kensuke, his eyes following the girl as she walked over to her giggling friends.
"Your report!"
"Huh? Well, I think the evidence speaks for itself," replied Kensuke whilst smirking.
"Yes, true. But still we need details man." countered Touji.
Kensuke just smiled and tapped his nose knowingly. "Ancient Chinese secret."
"I don't care if it's Chinese or ancient, although it does put me in the mood for some mugu gai pan..."
"Focus, Touji," warned Shinji.
"Oh yeah, we're not supposed to be keeping secrets from each other here, dude."
"All in good time, I promise."
Kensuke cast a glance across the grass at a few girls talking under another tree, all of whom start waving back at him. He smiles again and waves back. Shinji caught his hand automatically clenching and unclenching, which he willed to stop.
"You okay?" asks Touji.
Shinji looks up from his hand a little nervously. "Me? O-oh, just fine."
Having finished attempting to flirt, Kensuke turned back to the group. "Well, how about you, fearless leader?"
"I am pleased to say I've re-entered the 'wooing' stage of the game," smiled Touji, puffing out his chest for added effect.
"That would explain the sudden decrease in our cleaning duty and the rose that seems to be superglued to her hands," Kensuke noted.
"Huh... rose, where?"
Touji looked around to see Hikari smiling and giggling amongst a group of girls, with the rose he gave her clutched in her hand. The rest of the girls were swooning, he could guess about what. A large goofy smile spread across his face, his eyes half lidded while mumbling incoherently.
"Touji... yo dude," tested Kensuke, snapping his fingers in front of the boy's face.
Kensuke turned to Shinji while Touji was off in his trance. "Nope he's gone. I guess it's your turn then Shinji. Shinji?"
Kensuke looked at Shinji closely and noticed the boy staring back and forth between Touji and Hikari, panting, his face paling and his hands scrunched into tight balls and mumbling the words 'it's not fair' under his breath. Kensuke decided to point out the obvious.
"I'm guessing that you don't have anything to report."
Kensuke looks at his two friends, one googoo and the other about to hyperventilate. Calmly he packs up his bento and stands up.
"Good day then, gentlemen."
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Shinji stalked home alone, a bubbling cauldron of emotions. As per usual, the predominant of those emotions was depression. Kensuke and Touji had been off in Gah-Gah Land for the rest of the day, which hadn't helped. They normally walked part of the way home together, but Kensuke had been too busy talking to a crowd of female admirers while Touji and Hikari were already walking down the street.
It had been a boring day. Tokyo-3 High had a limited teaching staff, which meant that year groups were often stuck with the same teacher for the entire run of their high school education. By now, everyone in Shinji's class could recite Abe-Sensei longwinded history lecture by heart. Even mathematics classes somehow found their way back to the Second Impact. They were going to fail everything else, but at least the class would be receiving near flawless marks in their history examinations. Even Touji, who, much to Hikari's concernation, had freaked out last year during the English exam and eaten his test paper.
While pondering his many woes over a game of Solitaire, Shinji had seen something else that lowered his spirits. Down at the front of the school, another class was heading out to the oval for the Physical Education. The hyperactive Mana Kirishima had been at the forefront of the group, talking quite enthusiastically to some guy in her class. It looks like Shinji had lost his chance with her for good.
A truck passed by on the road. As Shinji turned to watch it pass, he caught the glint of blue at the periphery of his vision before it had a chance to startle him.
"Hi Ayanami," he said, turning around to look at his fellow pilot. A flicker of emotion (could it be disappointment?) crossed Rei's face, but it quickly passed.
"Ikari," she replied, nodding her head slightly in greeting. They stood there silently for a moment before Shinji's curiosity got the better of him. He had been wondering about her ever since he overhead she had been sent to the Principal's office.
"What happened in the Principal's office? Is there some kind of problem?"
"Yes. I have been a very naughty girl."
If Shinji had been drinking a glass of water, he would have spit it up at that instant.
"...come again!?" he squeaked.
"The school's network Admin registered my computer ID logged onto prohibited websites. He called me a naughty girl on several occasions."
Shinji sweatdropped. That sounded like something the school Admin would say, if the legends about the infrequently seen hermit where true.
"Forbidden material? Are you trying to build a N2 mine of some kind?" Shinji joked nervously. He didn't know where this was going, but he knew he wasn't going to like it.
"No. The School Admin made extensive print outs as evidence," Rei said, reaching into her school briefcase, "I procured some for the Commander's reference."
The print outs caught Shinji's eye for a moment, before he turned away in disgust. The content was something that Kensuke claimed to despise, yet had a whole folder on his computer set aside for.
"I was unaware that humans and cephalopods could interact in such a way."
Speaking of which, this whole situation had Kensuke's fingerprints all over it.
"Ah..." he stuttered out, his face flushing so fast he thought he would burst some veins in his face.
"Could you explain, Ikari?" she said, as curious as she was ever going to be.
"Ah... were you using your computer when they said..."
"I believe I was swimming at the time. However, in light of this new evidence, I will not swim again."
"But Ayanami, if you were swimming, how could you have been logged onto the web and accessed... this?" Shinji said, pointing to the print outs while trying not to look at them.
"I understand that. I told the Principal, but the Admin would not listen."
"Well as long as the Principal believes you, what's the problem?" Shinji asked. Now he had a hold of his shock, he was handling the situation well. His red face dimmed down to a mildly embarrassed pink.
"I can not swim anymore. I no longer feel safe."
"Come again?"
"In the water, I would be unable to protect myself," Rei said, lifting up the papers for the blanching Shinji to see clearly, "From this. It looks very... painful."
"From that? But it isn't real, Ayanami."
"I do not understand. These pictures..."
"They're made up. Like..." Shinji said, racking his mind for a moment, "like those doctored photos of the Second Impact in our school text books."
Something that approached understanding showed on Rei's face.
"I think I see," she began, "but why would someone wish to doctor a image of an woman in coitus onto..."
"I just don't know Ayanami" Shinji said, "I just don't know."
The two were silent again. Shinji resited the urge to look down at his feet.
"Thankyou anyway, Ikari," Rei said, folding up the print outs and returning them into her briefcase. "I will stay out of the water in the mean time though. Faked or not, I can no longer be easily replaced. Steps must be made to ensure my survival."
"Ah, okay then. No problem."
"Good day then," she said, walking off in the direction she had come from. Shinji blinked, analysing what had just happened. All things considering, he had handled himself rather well despite the strange subject material.
After all, what conceivable reason would Rei have to log onto www.tenticalmonsterattacks.com?
Maybe he could try to fulfil part of his pledge after all. He would never be as 'successful' as Touji or Kensuke, but at least they wouldn't be able to mock him for not trying at all.
Something approaching a plan formed in Shinji's mind. Looking down at his watch, he figured he could make a quick detour to the commercial district without being missed by Asuka and Misato. Resolve in his heart, he headed on his way.
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Asuka sat cross legged on her room floor with stacks of papers and folders all around her, the growing frustration quite apparent on her face as well as the lack of sleep caused by sorting through a very large assortment of information.
"Damn Japanese government agencies and their loose security measures. One measly hacker named Colonel Ken and the whole computer network goes down. So here I am, sifting through all this hardcopy instead."
She grimaced, remembering the large grin on the attendants face when he set down the entire mess on the desk, the words 'have fun' forever burned in her brain. Not even going back to university for her doctorate in theoretical physics required such heavy reading.
"This is going to take a lifetime," she groaned to herself.
For reasons unbeknownst to even her, Asuka turned her attention to the far wall, knowing that Shinji's room lay on the other side. She had heard him get home a few minutes ago and go straight into his private sanctuary, as per his usual routine. It seemed very nostalgic and perhaps even... comfortable. She had been in Japan for a week but had hardly seen her old room mate aside from the party and at meals. Of course they hadn't see much of each other in the past, but everything had been different back then. Or at least, that's what she told herself.
'Maybe I am getting a little lonely...' she thought, before laughing aloud. She wasn't a pathetic, lonely spinster like Misato. Yet.
'He did promise to help me after all, and I think this is a good a time as any,' she reminded herself.
Grabbing a small stack of papers, Asuka stood up and made her way to Shinji's room. Stopping outside his door, she knocked but no one answered.
'Probably got those stupid ear buds in.'
She pounded on the doorframe, not liking to be ignored. It wasn't like HE made any conscious effort to see her either...
"BAKA! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!" Asuka demanded, letting her temper flare.
The girl heard some scuffling around from inside the room, then finally the frantic voice she had wanted to hear.
"I'll be out in a minute!"
The day's worth of frustrations combined with the natural impatience of the girl had taken their toll. Her body acted independently of her mind as she grabbed the handle and slid the door back, knowing full well that he could even be changing.
"Whatever pathetic little activity you're up to can wait, this is... important..."
The papers hit the floor.
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Nestled in his favourite armchair Touji waited, his action plan fantastic resting on his lap, his right hand tapping on the armrest as he gazed at the telephone.
'What's the matter with me? This is the next step and everything has worked out great so far. Why can't I go further?' Touji berated himself.
He reached forward then quickly withdrew his arm, as if the electric device wished to bite his hand.
It was common knowledge that women and telephones were inseparable. The day scientists figured a way to implant mobile phones into a woman's skulls would spell the global meltdown of the world's telecommunication networks. It was also common knowledge that apart from absolute emergencies, men liked to keep phone calls as short as possible. In Touji's opinion, if he had to talk for more than thirty seconds on the phones, the phone companies were raking up his bill exponentially.
But... he remembered the glowing face of Hikari that day as she talked with her friends, and talked, and talked...
'Sure, I don't mind talking to her at all, but I doubt I'm interesting enough to go that long. Or maybe I don't have to... that guy in the movie just said "uh-huh" and "yeah" a lot, throw in a couple of "I love you's" and she'll do all the talking. YEAH! That's the ticket!'
Confidently he reached forward and grasped the phone and dialled her number. After several long and agonising rings the other end is picked up.
"Horaki household. Kodama Horaki speaking!" came the voice at the other end of the line.
The boy hesitated, sucking a deep breath before answering. "Ah hi, it's me Touji. Can I speak to Hikari please?"
"One moment please."
Obviously, the Horaki household was not known for its privacy, as the phone receiver was not covered. Of course, he couldn't tell if this was deliberate or accidental.
"Hey Hikari, it's your stud on the line!"
Not accidental.
"Ohh, I wonder what he wants," said another younger voice, obviously Nozomi.
"I'll give you two guesses what those might be."
Touji turned bright red and moved the phone away from his burning ears as the two girls giggled on the other end of the line. Definitely not accidental, he concluded.
'And they have the nerve to tell ME I have no shame!' the athlete thought sourly as he remembered the time Kodama had caught Hikari and him sharing a kiss outside the movies.
Finally the wait was over when he heard the sound of someone picking up the phone.
"I'm sorry it took so long Touji, I was right in the middle of putting something in the oven," came the apologetic voice of the class representative.
"That's okay, honey"
Hikari blushed and put her free hand to her cheek. It had been a while since Touji had ever called her that. She was a traditional girl and the western term 'babe' might have sat well with those girls on TV, but not her.
"Thankyou, Touji." she chirpily replied.
Touji blushed in turn, although it was only a little embarrassing- nothing like when he had overheard Hikari's sisters talking about him.
"So, why did you call?" asked the girl.
Touji's mouth dryed up. 'What else happened in the movie? I just remember the part after that where the guy... oh crap I'm screwed!'
"Ah... ah...um, to find out how you are today?"
"How I am?"
"Yeah."
"I'm fine, thankyou."
"...ah... good to hear," Touji slapped his hand over his face. They had been talking barely ten seconds and he was losing her. Even now, the phone company accountants were grinning in their cubicles, watching the price of his phone call skyrocket. It was always so much simpler and cheaper when he just wanted to ask her out.
"So?"
Obviously Hikari was picking up on his difficulties, so he had to do something fast. Suddenly he remembered what he was supposed to do. Talk about her, of course that was opening a whole other can of worms but he decided the benefits outweighed the risks and before proceeding he took the remote control for the TV and tossed it onto another chair on the other side of the room. There would be no distractions like all those other times...
FLASH!
"Yeah, I can go out on Sunday. But guess what? I made it onto the school orchestral tour. I still have more practice to do, but I think it will be a very great learning experience this summer."
Meanwhile on Touji's living room the boy has the phone nestled between his ear and shoulder watching a basketball game on TV when one of the players missed a layup and the opposition stole the ball.
"OH YOU SUCK!" He cried out in protest.
"WHAT?!" screamed Hikari on the other end of the line.
FLASH!
"So, um... How was your day?" asked Touji, lightly rubbing his cheek in response to the phantom pain that particular memory awoke.
"You already asked me that, Touji..."
'Eeep!' Touji thought.
"Besides, you should know that quite well, I saw you watching," Hikari coolly added.
Touji almost jumped out of his chair. "Y-You did?!"
"It's not like everyone can't see you guys under that tree," Hikari pointed out.
"Well you know it was all Kensuke's idea to begin with. Something about establishing an open line of fire..." Touji began, the words coming a lot easier as he reminisced.
When he finally bid Hikari goodnight and hung up the telephone, not even Hikari could believe how long they had been talking for.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----
Shinji hopped behind the door of his temporary wardrobe to hide himself from view, amidst the roaring laugher of Asuka. He didn't exactly see what was so particularly funny, but it was defiantly embarrassing. Looking down at himself, he examined his suit that consisted of a black blazer and pants with a red dress shirt and black tie. It seemed rather reasonable to him, but the laughter wasn't easily ignorable.
"Is there a problem Asuka?" He squeaked, his head hung in shame and cheeks flushing red. Hell, he had even seen that picture on one of the male models in one of Asuka's magazines! It had been less than a month old, so it couldn't be that out of fashion... could it?
Finally the girl calmed down and bent down to restack her fallen papers. Noticing the lack of mocking, he poked his head out around the door to see Asuka still standing there with a stack of papers in her arms and a strange smile on her face. She was trying to stifle a giggle, but was fighting a losing battle.
"What exactly was all that about?" she said, finally giving in and giggling, "Third Child?"
"Nothing," Shinji whispered.
"Well, to answer your question, I have two points to give you. First, I've never seen you in any formal clothes before, and obviously you haven't worn them before either because they're too big. Also, formal wear isn't accentuated with sneakers. Finally, you're dressed up like your dad."
"Am not!"
"That's all your dad ever wears, well besides the tie."
Meanwhile in Gendou Ikari's office, the man in question sits at his desk with his ever-faithful colleague Fuyutski present beside him. They both watch the surveillance footage from Shinji's room on a drop-down ceiling monitor.
"She's onto you," stated Fuyutski.
Gendou continued watching the monitor, unconcerned. "My dressing habits are not for conversation. Of course, this is coming from the man who wears that brown suit day in, day out."
"It's called a uniform. I don't remember you ever having to conform to the dress codes the rest of us have to abide by," retorted Fuyutski
"Then we shall call this my official Commander's uniform."
"Taking the easy way out, are we?"
"Very well then," replied Gendou, taking the bait, "I shall wear a green turtleneck tomorrow."
"Big step."
Back in the room, Shinji had reluctantly come out from behind the door to let Asuka take a better look. Asuka ran an appraising eye over the boy before returning to her previous line of questioning.
"So you didn't tell me before, what's this," she said, gesturing at him, "all about?"
He blushed again. "Nothing."
A playful smile crept across Asuka's face. This was becoming interesting... "Aww, come on Shinji. Don't you even want to tell me?"
"Not really at all, no," whispered Shinji.
The girl raised a questioning eyebrow. "What was that?"
"Nothing!"
Asuka sauntered up to him with her hands behind her back, pushing her chest out for added effect, almost beaming as the mood went from interesting to almost comical. Shinji looked up for a second and quickly hung his head again, it was all too embarrassing and Asuka was starting to act very strangely.
"Are we trying to impress someone?" she asked.
The young Ikari remained silent.
"I guess we are then," Asuka smiled, "is it someone I know?"
Shinji began to open his mouth, then shut it.
Asuka's smile transformed into a wide grin. "Oh, this IS delicious. Tell me..."
However, her target remained silent and just stood with his head hung. She could hear him whisper something unintelligible under his breath. Suddenly, all semblance of playfulness left her and she grew angry. She tried to reach Shinji and all the baka did was pull away like he always did. Why should she bother?
"Oh, I guess it doesn't really matter. I mean, what girl could ever be impressed by YOU!" she snapped.
Shinji looked up, more surprised than he should have been. It had been a while since he had experienced his last Asuka mood swing.
"Listen mister, you don't know the first thing about being stylish! So you get some different clothes, all stupid little gimmicks. What is worse, all you've done is copied off someone else. The appearance can't hide what's on the inside and you should know that better than anyone."
Shinji was expecting that. No matter how much she had changed, Asuka was still Asuka. He knew that she would react in such a way; he only had one shot at this plan. Off course, the fact that Asuka had caught him off-guard had left him floundering, but if he ran now that would be it for good.
Thus, he had stood still as she berated him, trying to summon up the courage just to utter three simple words.
"And you do?"
Asuka blinked. That simple statement from Shinji hit her like a wrecking ball. Shinji had dared challenge her views, even if it was only of what was socially 'in'. That would not stand.
"Of course I do!" she announced, voice exploding like the Moon from the Earth after First Impact. "I, unlike some people, haven't been living under a rock my whole life!"
"So if that's true, you think that you could teach anybody to be as cool as you then?"
"Well not as cool as I am, that would just be impossible. But I'm sure that my student would be perfectly able to fit into any social situation."
Shinji gulped. It was do or die time.
"So are you willing to bet on that?" he asked.
"Bet?"
"Y-yes... a bet."
The girl crossed her arm, a look of curiosity on her face. "Go on."
"You..." he started, raising his head to look her in the face, "teach me to fit in with other people my age within three weeks."
"You're joking, right?"
He looked away for a second as if consulting some invisible force in the room before turning back.
"No..."
Asuka regarded her fellow pilot with mild shock, looking into his eyes she saw resilience and conviction, something she rarely saw from her comrade and perhaps friend. It intrigued her greatly.
'Mein Gott he's NOT joking! Besides it might make my stay just all that more entertaining... perhaps for the both of us,' she thought to herself.
"The stakes?" she asked.
He had already come this far, it was time to go for Gold. Summoning up all his courage, he spoke the words he had spent that afternoon rehearsing.
"If I win... I would like... to take you to the senior formal."
The room went eerily silent, even the sounds of the city seemed to disappear. Asuka looked directly into Shinji's now terrified eyes with an impassive gaze.
"So, this is what it was all about?" she whispered, uncharacteristically.
Shinji stepped forward towards the girl as suddenly she seemed so lost and fragile. Suddenly her eyes hardened and focused, the innocence previous long forgotten.
"Little Shinji so desperate for a date he has to try and TRICK me into one? Did you really think that was going to work, Third Child?"
The outburst sent Shinji reeling backwards straight onto his bed while Asuka marched forward. The boy looked away from the girl while she loomed over him awaiting his response.
"I'm sorry Asuka... I just wanted to prove something to you," he squeaked.
"Prove?" she asked, her voice faltering, "Prove what?"
"That I am worthy of your time despite all that's happened. I know it was a silly idea now..."
Asuka blinked. It had been a while since she had come to terms with the painful idea that Shinji did not believe he was better than she was, but even then, she had never expected to hear the words out of his mouth. At least, not at a time like this and here he was, embarrassing himself in order to try and win her acceptance, in his usual stoogeish-way but trying none the less. Was she not trying the same thing? Asuka exhaled loudly and unclenched her fists.
"I accept."
Shinji looked up in surprise. "You do?"
She nodded. "I do. But if you lose, you have to go on a date with the bird."
"PENPEN?!" Shinji exclaimed.
"Wark?" came a questioning squawk from the living room.
"We're talking about you, not to you!" countered Asuka loudly.
There was a soft thump, followed by the ruffling and ripping of paper.
"I hope you weren't attached to that magazine," said Shinji with mild amusement.
"I hate that bird so much..." growled Asuka clenching her fist.
"You must hate me a lot too if you want to send me on a date with him."
"No, but I think if I'm being forced to go on a date with a baka, then you should run the same risk," she smiled mischievously, "of course there is one other clause to our contract."
"O-kay..." mumbled Shinji, still in too much of daze.
Asuka grinned and took Shinji's arms and outstretched them before turning around making him blush at the front row seat of her rear end covered by her cutoffs. Why was she presenting herself like this? Did she want him to touch her? Blushing heavily he decided to reach forward a little before the girl turned back around and suddenly his arms became very heavy as a stack of papers was tossed onto them.
"We get my work done first that is!" she beamed.
"Fine," groaned Shinji.
"And stop blushing like that!"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---- Meanwhile at the Aida homestead, a disturbance in the force is brewing. Sitting behind his computer, Kensuke was going through his many hundreds of new emails.
'Spam, spam, spam, job offer from Microsoft, spam, spam, pornography spam,' he thought to himself, mentally noting to check the last piece of spam out later. Some of Kensuke's geek habits were proving harder to throw off than smoking would have been.
Kensuke then opened another window in his email client and typed in the contributor's address to "Jane's Fighting Mecha". He attached the article he wrote for them this month and sent it off, content in the knowledge that he had increased the sum knowledge of the world (or at least, the part of the world that consists of Mecha enthusiasts). Now with all his regular business done, it was time to move onto the shadow games that were becoming his social life.
The response he had gotten in school had surpassed even his wildest expectations. The only hitch was the whole 'Communist 5th Column trying to take over Japan' thing, but he was confident he could deal with them without inconveniencing his other plans. So confident in fact, that he had decided to advance his timetable considerably. He needed to provide a few more pieces of 'evidence' before some of the girls looked at the rumours logically and released what bull plop they were.
He hacked into the High School message server through the backdoor he had installed during his infiltration mission and left some new rumours on with different ID addresses and time-release packets. Satisfied that he had kept the pot boiling for now, he opened the home page of the Tokyo-3 Times. Entering the classified section, he indicated he wished to have a death notice placed in the paper. Several minutes and one hacking program later, Kensuke had left his message without having to fork out the insignificant amount of Yen it would take to place the add legitimately. Kensuke grinned and cracked his knuckles, content in the benefits of being a hacker. This was followed by a sharp burst of pain as his hacker knuckles, long since deprived of anything remotely resembling calcium, cracked.
'Note to self: Find out how much milk is really in milkshakes.'
The death notice would add another sign of credibility to the existence of Kensuke's dead 'mystery' woman, as well as a lot of his other misinformation. Now all he had to do was sit down and wait for the prey to come to him...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----
Another day, another dollar. Shinji returned home from school, dropping his bag and removing his shoes at the door. He had wisely decided not to tell Touji and Kensuke about the debacle last night with Asuka, or of the deal he had struck with her. There were times in his life when he wished his two best friends would stop laughing at him all the time.
Speaking of Asuka...
"Oh Shinjiiii..." she sickly-sweetly called from the lounge room.
'She probably has more records for me to dig through,' he thought morosely as he entered the lounge room. However, he couldn't be further from the truth.
Asuka had moved the sofa up against a wall, leaving some clear space in the middle of the room. If he remembered correctly, Misato had done the same thing for their sync training.
Asuka stood right in front of the sofa, lightly tapping a riding crop in her hands. Where she had gotten a riding crop from was anyone's guess. As far as he knew, she didn't even like horses. Her expression indicated that she meant all business.
To her side stood Pen Pen, with flippers folded behind his back and trying to imitate Asuka's stern look. The tin pot on his head made him look even less authoritarian than cute, but the avian no longer cared. He had managed to open Misato's Yebisu fridge again, and was now at the point where more beer pumped through his veins than actual blood.
"Lets begin, shall we?" she said. Shinji slouched over to her, making sure he stood out of the strike range of the riding crop. He may not have lived with Asuka for a year or two, but the finely honed escape instinct was as strong as ever.
"I'm ready," he said, hesitant. He had spent so much time trying to figure out how he was getting Asuka to help him that he hadn't even thought 'how' she was going to do it.
Asuka began to circle him, riding crop held behind her back and pacing in a precise military march that would make her Prussian forbearers proud. Pen Pen attempted to imitate her, but marching is not suited to a creature that God designed to waddle. Especially one as intoxicated as this particular penguin.
"...warrrrrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkk..." Pen Pen moaned before passing out and collapsing in a heap.
"Stop slouching," Asuka said to Shinji, ignoring Pen Pen's cry of distress. However, on her next revolution, she kicked the comatose bird out of the way a bit harder than was necessary. 'Serves him right'
Shinji's back raised a little, but only a little. This was meet with a swift slap to the back of the head. Luckily, Asuka had used her own hand, rather than the riding crop.
"Oww! I'm trying," he complained.
"I said stop it, not moderately decrease it!" she said, coming to a stop behind him, "if your not standing like you have a rod up your ass in a second, I really will stick a rod up your ass!"
Shinji sprang to full military attention upon hearing that. Asuka smiled, despite herself. Luckily for her though, Shinji couldn't see her. She did have a reputation to maintain, after all.
"That's better. Now we're done with basic posture, lets move onto walking. Do a lap around the room and come back here," she ordered. Shinji quickly complied, trying to avoid as many slaps to the back of the head as possible.
"I said walk, don't shuffle! Keep that head up! Swing the arms a little!" Asuka said, providing ongoing commentary.
"What's the point of this?"
"If you wanted to be perceived as a man instead of a slug, then start acting like a man!"
"Oh," he said, trying to put a little bit more jaunt into his step.
"A little better. It'll do... for now," Asuka said, grudgingly. Shinji perked up on hearing this. Coming from Asuka, this was as good as hearing her saying "Congratulations."
"Now, for your final lesson for today" she said, a glint in her eye.
"Yes?" he said, expectantly.
"Hello Shinji. It's been a pleasant day today, hasn't it?" Asuka growled in her native German.
"Eep! Sorry!" Shinji squeaked, whatever confidence he had built up in the last few minutes ripped to shreds. He didn't know exactly what she had said, only that in context she was angry and that his name was involved.
"Sorry? Sorry about what?" Asuka said, sighing. God only knows what Shinji would do if Rammenstein staged a comeback tour in Japan.
"Well... you said..."
"I said what, Third Child?" Asuka smirked, stepping closer to him, "if you had bothered to learn the language of Bach and Beethoven, you would realise I merely asked you about the weather. So what's there to be sorry about?"
"Ah... ah... I don't really know, but... but... Sorry!"
"You're doing it again! Is "sorry" all you can say?"
"Oh. I'm s..." Shinji begins, before clamping his hands to his mouth. He didn't need Asuka to tell him that he apologised too much, but it was an ingrained reflex.
"I decide to glare and say a few choice words for no reason whatsoever, and you melt like butter in the sun! Why can't you stand up for yourself once every once in a while?" she stated, brining the riding crop out from behind her once more. Shinji tried to keep a straight face and not flee in terror.
"Because... well, self preservation I guess," he replied quietly.
"Huh?"
Shinji decided to take a gamble and open himself up a little. If it succeeded, he might win a little more understanding from Asuka. If not... well, he would win an unmarked grave on the outskirts of Zero Lake.
"Because some people don't want me to stand up to them. Even if I did," Shinji's said, his eyes faltering and looking down at the ground once more. He couldn't stand the questioning look from Asuka's blue eyes. "It would only cause pain."
Asuka blinked. She had expected him to say many things, give as many excuses to avoid the truth. However, this was dangerously close to an actual confession. Maybe she had underestimated him after all.
"Thank you for the first lesson Asuka. I'll try and take them to heart."
With that, he turned on his heals and walked back to his room, his back erect in the manner that Asuka had proscribed. Despite this, his eyes were firmly closed shut as he relied on his memory to get him back to his room. Any moment he expected to hear the sound of Asuka's feet running on carpet, launching herself to tackle him. Yet the apartment is deathly silent, apart from the occasional penguin moan. When he reached the comparative safety of his room, he switches on the lock and collapses behind the door.
'God in heaven... she's incapacitated with rage!' he thought to himself, shaking.
Back in the lounge room, Asuka looked down at Misato's riding crop and sighed. She had thought it would add a flair of theatrics to the proceedings, but it seemed Shinji had taken the threat seriously. She dropped the riding crop and sat down on the ground, a lot less cheerful than when she had begun the lesson.
"Took it to heart, indeed..."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----
At roughly the same time, although a few kilometres down the road, Kensuke maintained his nightly vigil in front of the computer monitor.
"Spam, Spam, Cease and desist from Square-Disney, Spam..."
His routine was interrupted by a sudden ringing sound that pierced his ears above the Anime OST track blearing from his computer speakers. Off course, Kensuke fell out of his chair in surprise. Rising to his feet, he dived to pick up the telephone before it rang out.
"Hello?" he yelped, hoping whoever rang was still on the other end.
"Ah, hello," said an unfamiliar voice. An unfamiliar female voice. "Is that you, Kensuke?"
"I think so. Let me check," he said, inwardly cursing for our lame this joke sounded, "yep, still me."
Surprisingly, she actually laughed that. Kensuke sighed to himself in relief. He hadn't lost her just yet.
"I just rang to see how you were holding up. I ran across the newspaper today and saw the obituaries. I guess those rumours at school are true. We never suspected you were really like this."
"I'm coping, I guess. It's all been so sudden."
"Well, I was just thinking about what you must be going through and was wondering if you would like to talk."
"Ah, I appreciate the sentiment but I don't know if I..."
"I know you must still be in shock. I was when my mother died, during an Angel attack."
"Oh... I didn't know. I'm sorry if I've reopened any old wounds," Kensuke said, the regret in his voice not faked. A part of him felt rather guilty that his lies had forced the girl to bring up her painful past. However, the more cynical part of him remembered the old English phrase 'You can't make an omelette without killing a few people.'
"Don't worry. It happened a long time ago."
"But still..." Kensuke said. On the other end of the phone, he heard another female voice talking to the girl. This wasn't something he had expected. There were two of them?
"Ah..." she said, having come to some form of an agreement with her friend, "well, I was wondering... after school tomorrow, would you like to meet up and talk?"
"That... would be nice," he said, pretending to be stunned by the idea to maintain his false grief.
"You know the Café around the block from school? How about we meet after school tomorrow?"
"I'm looking forward to it, ah..."
"Sorry! My name is Reiko Tatomi. I know I've never had much to say to you and all, but..."
'I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Okay, tomorrow then. Night!" she replied, hanging up. Kensuke held the beeping phone to his head for a moment longer before putting it back in its cradle. He had received a number of sympathetic emails from girls while at school, but this was the first telephone call. From Miss Reiko Tatomi of all people, the Head Girl and only person Asuka had been jealous of look- wise back when she was in Class 2A! His face broke into the wild smile he had fought to keep under raps during his conversation. His plan was actually working!
He reached into his pant pockets and pulled out the small tape recorder he had brought the other day to chronicle his efforts. Clicking the record button, he spoke into the little microphone.
"Phase Three completed at 21:00 hours," he said, a wide smile on his face, "The scenario permits a small victory dance upon completion of the stage."
Alone in his room, Kensuke Aida began to do the snoopy dance in front of his computer.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----
Later that night Misato half walked, half stumbled down the hallway towards her apartment door. She would have been there sooner but in her state of drunkenness she remembered the number of her apartment, just not the street address.
"Why didsh they buildsh all the buildins the shame in thish street?"
With a surprising amount of dexterity that required both arms, the woman produced her key card and swiped it through the card reader after only half a dozen attempts. The door made a small pleasant chime and opened, just as Misato practically fell through the doorframe.
"What was that?" asked Shinji coming out of his room.
"It sounded like a sack of potatoes hitting the floor," responded Asuka.
Misato crawled into the living room while trying to kick off her shoes.
The girl shrugged. "I was close."
Finally succeeding in removing her footwear, Misato uneasily climbed to her feet and studied the two teenagers. Shinji was dressed in his suit while his latest experiment with hair gel almost glistened in the light, while Asuka wore her baggy night shirt and cutoff jeans.
Misato blinked.
'Ish that Sshinnji?' she thought. Shinji didn't dress like that and he defiantly didn't put gel in his hair, there wasn't enough to gel really. Therefore, according to her drunken logic, the boy in the suit couldn't be Shinji.
"I shee you gots a boy over, eh Asooka?. Shingee musht be in hus room then. I'll leave yoush two alone."
But before she went to collapse in her room, she ambled over to Shinji and looked him over carefully, making the boy sweat. Finally, Misato pulled back.
"Okaysh then. But if yoush trhy anfin funnie with her mishter, I've gots a gun and the ballsh to use it. Otay?" She slurred menacingly.
The boy gulped. "Got it."
"Goodsh."
Having said that, Misato stumbled into her room and slid the door shut, followed by a thump and loud snoring several seconds later. Both Shinji and Asuka stared at each other, then back at the door, then back at each other. A smile began to form on Shinji's face
"Well, that was unexpected."
Asuka crossed her arms. "So you fooled a drunk woman. Congratulations."
Shinji's smile began to wane.
"But a good start," she said, covering the small twinge of guilt.
"Thanks."
Asuka looked at Shinji, the look of accomplishment written all over his face. It felt strange for Asuka to look at him when he was like that. There were some times when Shinji in all his ineptness could do something that would really make her want to smile. And he was doing it right now. Instead, she looked away and stretched while faking a yawn.
"Yeah well, I think that's enough for tonight. We'll start lesson two tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?" Shinji asked, rather surprised.
The girl raised an eyebrow. "You have a problem with tomorrow?"
"O-of course not. I just thought that you would..."
"Just because I'm looking forward to you lose doesn't mean I'm not going to give you all the help you can get!" she finished, flexing her arm for added effect.
"Of course."
"So rest up Third Child. We have a full day ahead of us."
He nodded. "Uh, sure thing."
Asuka watched as Shinji walked towards his room, no doubt to get changed into his night clothes. As he walked, she didn't notice her eyes wander until they were looking directly at Shinji's butt. In the past, Asuka had caught herself doing this before it ever happened but her mental defences didn't seem to be kicking in. Blinking, she eventually turned herself away.
'Oh geeze,' she scolded herself, almost blushing.
She had watched Shinji grow through puberty, witnessed his body develop... for the better she admitted, but never before had she ever had ever really 'looked' at him like that. Years ago while she still lived in the Katsuragi home she had read in one of her magazines that girls and boys who lived in close proximity to one another for prolonged times had 42% more chance of becoming romantically involved than normal. She had sworn to herself that day to not become a statistic, but now she started to see what the magazine was talking about. Maybe it was her biological clock ticking away, or maybe she just hadn't her 'quality' time for a while...
'Why do I feel like this? It's not like I haven't seen a male rear end before.'
Asuka had honestly never thought that much of Shinji, even while he and she were living under the same roof. She always suspected that Shinji harboured some kind of attraction towards her. It gave her a position of power over the young Ikari, she knew he would never do anything deliberately to displease her and such moulded him into almost the perfect servant but as time passed the attraction of whole 'relationship' was beginning to fade. When she embarked for Germany she remembered the look on Shinji's face, trying desperately to mask the sorrow that he no doubt felt. If it had been months sooner she probably wouldn't have cared less but then she had always been good at masking her emotions. She concluded that Shinji would quickly lose any infatuation with her. It still didn't make the blow to her ego any easier when she saw Shinji talking with that Kirishama girl. She didn't mean to explode like she did, but just the sight of Shinji actually relaxed in the company of another girl actually made her... jealous. She had lived with Shinji for the better part of two years and never once did he loosen up around her. It hurt. But perhaps the shoe was on the other foot now?
Asuka shook her head as she walked towards her room. 'Last time I ever eat a fudgecical before bed, creates too much internal monologue.'
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----
Touji felt an odd sense of deja vu as he sat in his armchair facing the telephone, his fingers steepled. A bead of sweat ran down the side of his face.
'Come on ring, damn you ring!' he mentally screamed at the phone.
Suddenly the vigil was broken by a high-pitched electronic ringing noise emanating from the white box in front of the boy. Before it even finished its first ring, he had snatched the receiver from the cradle.
"Hello?"
"Touji!" Kensuke shouted down the line. "You'll never believe what..."
"Can't afford to tie up the line!"
"But you have call wai..."
Touji put the receiver back into place and returned to his waiting position. Several seconds later the phone began to ring again, hurriedly Touji picked up.
"Touji Suzuhara, this is Kenada Usami from "Who Wants To Win a Lot of Yen?" came the cheesy voice, "your grandfather is on the line for the final question. Which team in the 2007 series lost the finals because of a foul shot?"
"Can't talk now!" responded the frantic teen.
With that he hung up. Then looked at the phone, his eyes dilating.
"F&#K YOU KENSUKE!"
The phone began to ring again. Touji angrily grabbed the receiver.
"What?!" he growled down the line, "oh its you Taka."
He listened for a second. "No, its nothing. I just had some bad calls previously. So what's the word anyway?"
He listened again.
"Yes I know they book months in advance, well excuse me for being stupid and ignorant! Yes I know they were hard to get, so what is the damage anyway?"
The boy's weary eyes fly open.
"So... how much do they sell kidneys for these days?" He asked. "That much? Well I think I need at least one."
Touji's expression changed from shock to anger as he listened to the taunts from the person on the other end.
"I am not a cheapskate! No your sister does not need to know about this! Fine. You've got a deal, but I hate you now you realise. Just making sure."
Sinking further back into the armchair the teen listened as the gravity of the situation became apparent to him.
"Yeah, I'll pick them up tomorrow... you bloodsucker."
He replaced the phone and brought his right palm up to his temple, feeling the screams of thousands of yen that were suddenly silenced.
"First the angel takes one half of me, now Hikari is taking the other half." He sighed. "Well I hope Hikari likes the Kyoto Symphony Orchestra or I just practically sold my body and my soul for nothing."
He picked up the phone for one last time and began to dial.
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Author Comments
Rion:
It's taken us a little bit longer this time around with a lot of upheaval in the ranks. Strife with pre-readers, editing and good old fashioned real life getting in the way. Have no fear though, chapter four will be quickly following along behind. I hope you all continue to enjoy reading this as much as we've enjoyed writing it. Also our new Ramen multimedia interactive menu is up at www.operation-a801.com where soon will be available even more goodies like omitted scenes, omakes and production notes.
Seph:
Was inactive at the time of this submission and therefore doesn't get his own comments. That will teach him to be online when I am.