The Decemberween Carol Part 2
Strong Bad didn't wait a lot, for going to his past took some time. So after a few minutes, it was two o'clock. He expected another ghost, like Sir Strong Bad, to show up.Instead,he saw Marshie.
"Buy my Decemberween Red and Green Marshmallow-flavored Marshmallows!" said Marshie.
"AAAAAA!" screamed Strong Bad as he fainted for an hour.
"Good job Marshie. Now I'll take over from here!" said the King of Town as he reached up and ate Marshie and looked over Strong Bad until two-o-clock.
Then Strong Bad woke up.
"What are you doing in my house?" asked Strong Bad.
"I am the spirit of Decemberween present!" explained the King of Town.
"Aren't you supposed to be eating right now instead of showing me what everyone else is doing?" asked Strong Bad.
"I can manage for tonight," said the King of Town as he "grabbed" Strong Bad and went through a vortex through time.
"Uh, King of Dorks? If you are the spirit of the present, then aren't we supposed to just go outside and spy on everyone else?" asked Strong Bad.
"Ooh, right!" remembered The King of Town as they stopped flying, and landed in Strong Bad's party room, where Strong Mad, Strong Sad, Coach Z, and Bubs were having a very late-night party while drinking Not so Cold Ones while having a buffet of food (supplied by Bubs).
"So I said to Bubs, let's crash at Strong Bad's but where is he? And next thing you know, the pop singers of Mortallica scream 'I'm gooppy!' and next thing ya know, there's are inveesible people right behind us!" said Coach Z.
"I barely understand what you're talking about," replied Strong Sad.
"You know, this party is ten times better without Strong Bad! If he were here, all he would do is to grab our attention and do some weird dance with Poot-Slap! What the crap is it with that?" asked Bubs.
"DANCING SUCKS!" yelled Strong Mad as he ate a club sandwich in one bite.
"Hey! That was mine!" protested the King of Town, while having the opportunity for more food.
"By the way, where is Strong Bad?" asked Bubs.
"I don't know, maybe he's being visited by the three spirits of Decemberween to show him about his wrongdoings," explained Strong Sad.
The rest who were visible laughed at Strong Sad's explanation.
"But it could be true!" protested Strong Sad.
The ones who were laughing laughed even harder. Strong Bad and the King of Town were behind the partiers, but the partiers couldn't see Strong Bad and the King of Town.
"Uh, how come they were having a party right now while I was sleeping?" asked Strong Bad, but the King of Town was feasting on the buffet.
"Well, guess I'm hungry," said Strong Bad as he attempted to grab a Swiss Cake Roll, but his boxing glove went right through it, and then the King of Town ate it.
"Hey! How come you can eat while I can't! And won't they notice the absence of food?" asked Strong Bad.
"Hey, where's the food?" asked Coach Z.
"My chocolates ran away from me again!" exclaimed Bubs.
"Uh, shouldn't we go somewhere else?" asked Strong Bad.
"Go on to Homestar's place, I'm still feasting!" said the King of Town as he feasted on the pile of rotten eggs.
So Strong Bad went through walls to go to Homestar's house. He went through the wall and went to the living room.
The Cratchits were settled around the dinner table and said their grace. Then they began feasting on their goose
"Hurrah!" cried out Tiny Tim.
The family also had mashed potatoes and apple-sauce. For dessert, they had pudding. After dinner, they settled in their living room by the fireplace.
"A merry Decemberween to us all, my dears! Cornbread bless us!" said Bob Cratchit.
"Cornbread bless us all, everyone!" shouted Tiny Tim.
Homestar and Marzipan were actually watching the movie on television in Homestar's living room.
"Homestar, are you sure people are supposed to come to our party?" asked Marzipan as she looked at the table in the kitchen with tofu, vegetables shaped like turkey, and a tofu cake.
"I'm suwe," replied Homestar.
"Did you send out the invitations to Bubs, Coach Z, and some other people?" asked Marzipan.
"Oh, I sent them all to a Mellow mushwoom," replied Homestar.
"No wonder nobody's coming to the party," muttered Marzipan.
Then the doorbell rang. Homestar answered it and The Cheat came in. The Cheat was hobbling on a stick from the injury he got from the caper.
"Hello The Cheat, whatya wanna do?" asked Homestar.
"Uh, I think this is going to be too cute, I'll go back home now," said Strong Bad as he walked back to his house as The Cheat, Marzipan, and Homestar began singing Decemberween carols.
So he went back to sleep on his couch. An hour later, it got really chilly, as the partiers left the house. Strong Bad was woken up to see the spirit of Decemberween future…
… a tall person with a green cloak and a shovel.
"Hey man, you're the loser of the future?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked person only nodded.
"Oh, you're pretty silent eh? That's good enough to be the third weirdo," said Strong Bad.
The cloaked person just stood there, not answering.
"Okay, take me to the future," ordered Strong Bad.
Then the cloaked person grabbed Strong Bad and they went through some vortex to the future, going to the basement. The differences: the place was darker, the couch was replaced by a black leather couch, and the TV was replaced by a huge TV set with a DVD Player, DVD's, a Nintendo Game Pyramid, Playstation 3, an Xbox2, and other cool stuff not there in the present. Then they went to Strong Bad's computer room, and found a Windows XP and Beyond laptop. Strong Bad's computer room also had a poster that said "Pom-Pom's room" and had some posters with hot ladies.
"Hey! Where's my Lappy? I don't like new junk! Where's my Lappy?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked person didn't answer. Then Pom Pom arrived and went to MSN Hotmail to answer his emails (don't ask how he uses the computer).
Dear Pom Pom,
How do you type with little flipper things that you can't even use to detach The Cheat taped to your body?
Michelangelo
Pom Pom just deleted the email. Then the cloaked figure took Strong Bad to Strong Mad's room, who was crying constantly while looking at a picture. It was a picture of Strong Mad, Strong Bad, and Homestar dancing during the "Experimental Film" music video, except Homestar was cut out and replaced by a picture of The Cheat.
"Hey man, what's wrong? Oh right, I'm invisible, and untouchable," said Strong Bad.
Then Strong Bad saw something so bizarre, he almost fainted. It was Strong Sad, only it wasn't Strong Sad.
"Here comes the Strong Sad," sang magical voices in the tune of "Here Comes the Thnikkaman".
Strong Sad was wearing a blue vest, shades, and was smiling.
"Yo big bro, like, stop flooding the house, we both live in the same joint! Plus, it's Decemberween!" said Strong Sad.
"What the crap is wrong with him? I mean, joint is jail! Wait, this is something like jail, is it?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked figure just stood there.
"Anyway, you suck, I'm going to make out with Marzipan, although she's nothing compared to the thousands of hot girls attracted to me," said Strong Sad as he left. Magical voices sang, "There goes the Strong Sad!"
"So let me get this straight, Strong Sad's the coolest guy ever, henna, henna, henna?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked figure nodded. Then he took Strong Bad outside (raining, how strange) where he saw something at Bubs Concession Stand. Bubs and Coach Z (at a ruined Bubs Concession Stand) were selling all of Strong Bad's stuff FOR FREE! Worse, to the Unguraits!
"Oh crap, now those mutant cannibals get all of my stuff! Wait, wasn't the Poopsmith supposed to guard our place from the Unguraits?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked figure shook his head. Meanwhile, Strong Bad witnessed what was happening.
"Get your free Lappy 486 right here!" shouted Bubs as he tossed Strong Bad's laptop (probably broken down for some reason) to an Ungurait, who ran off to a newly-made cave house in Strongbadia, now a complex of cave houses for Unguraits. Strong Bad watched in horror as all of his cool stuff were given away for free to the barbaric creatures.
"What happened? Did something happen to the Poopsmith so the Unguraits could take over Free Country, USA?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked figure nodded. Then he took Strong Bad to the Stick, to see something weird: Homestar making out with the Tire!
"So aftew we do that, how about we go home and have some melonade?" asked Homestar.
"…" replied Tire.
"Oh, I see. Then how about owangeade?"
"…"
"Then what do you like?"
"…"
"Motor-Oil-ade? I think I can get something else, like Butter-da, do you want Butter-da?" asked Homestar.
"…" replied Tire.
"Man, you sure are picky when it comes to dwinks," said Homestar.
"Uh, did Homestar turn mental or something? I see what he's become without me," said Strong Bad.
Then they saw the King of Town, who turned slim and handsome (shudder) and cool. There were fans admiring him, as well as interviewers.
"And so, I'd like to say because of no Strong Bad, I got the chance for the spotlight," explained the King of Town.
"Let me guess, he's cool as well, as well as Homsar?" asked Strong Bad.
The cloaked person nodded and took Strong Bad to the long-deserted graveyard. On the way, they saw Homsar was as cool as Strong Sad, for he was wearing shades and women were cooing over him.
At the graveyard, they saw Strong Mad mourning over a tombstone. Then Strong Mad walked away as Strong Bad and the cloaked figure looked at the tombstone.
"Here Lies The Cheat,
Died of the Popular-less Disease,
Cheating in the Great Beyond."
"What?! The Cheat is dead? Oh man! First, Strong Sad's cool. Next, Homsar's cool. Next, the King of Town's cool. Next, the Unguraits took over the place. Next, all of my stuff's sold for free. Next, Homestar's weird, and, er, weirder, and, weirderer. How can things get worse?" asked Strong Bad.
Then the cloaked figure pointed to another tombstone. Strong Bad read it.
HERE LIES
STRONG BAD
"Checking e-mails and kicking Cheats in the hereafter
Buried with his hundred girlfriends
And like, a jillion dollars
Please don't dig up the grave"
"Whoa! I'm dead! Whoa! That tombstone looks exactly like the way I wanted it to be! Nice! Someone's been paying attention! So, I guess you reveal yourself now. Wait, aren't you the Poopsmith?" Strong Bad asked the cloaked person.
Then the cloaked person pointed to the Poopsmith, riding a motorcycle with the King of Town.
"Happy Decemberween everybody!" shouted the Poopsmith, who broke his vow of silence.
"Then who the crap are you?" Strong Bad asked the cloaked person.
Then the cloaked person took off his hood, revealing, a black circle?
"Whoa! You're Stickly-Man! Dude! Can you teach me some tricks?" asked Strong Bad.
Stickly-Man whacked Strong Bad's head with his shovel, knocking him unconscious. Then Strong Bad woke up on his couch.
"Whoa, I guess this whole Decemberween thing is over. I guess I should do something nice… nah, I'll just throw a party," decided Strong Bad as he left the couch.
So Strong Bad had a party with a lot of people invited. They had a good time. Strong Bad still remained evil, but hey, at least he's not dead, as well as The Cheat. Speaking of that…
Strong Bad began singing after the party while Strong Mad and Strong Sad stayed.
"I got mad at The Cheat! Uh!
For screwing up the latest caper! Uh!
I hope I don't see his name in the caper, in the obituaries,
Cause that would mean he's dead.
The Cheat is not dead!
I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead,
The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad.
"DEAD!" shouted Strong Mad, who began clapping with Strong Sad.
"Oh, I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead. The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad.
"Dead!" shouted Strong Sad.
"I'm so glad The Cheat is not… Just the claps! Just the claps!" ordered Strong Bad as Strong Mad and Strong Sad continued clapping, "Strong Sad, you still have the rhythms?"
"Oh sure, I have them all the time," replied Strong Sad.
"Keep it rolling, guys, keep it rolling. Uh! I cracked wise at The Cheat!
But in my defense he cracked wise at me first!
I hope he doesn't end up in a hearse!
In the cemetery!
Cause, once again, that would mean he's dead," sang Strong Bad.
"The Cheat is not dead!" sang Strong Bad and a choir of kids, "I'm so glad the Cheat is not dead!
The Cheat is not dead!" sang the choir while Strong Bad said, "Whoa! Where'd this choir come from?"
"I'm so glad the Cheat is not dead!
The Cheat is not dead!" sang the choir while Strong Bad said, "You guys sound great!"
"I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead!
The Cheat is not dead!
I'm so glad the cheat is not dead!
The Cheat is not dead!
I'm so glad the cheat is not dead!
The Cheat is not dead!
I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead...
"CHEAT IS NOT DEAD! (Cheat is not dead!)" sang the choir, when Strong Bad pulled out a plug.
"Strong Sad, do you know what made the choir, sing?" asked Strong Bad.
"I don't know," replied Strong Sad.
"Anyway, Happy Decemberween, losers!" said Strong Bad as they were in a snowy area and a magical choir kept on singing, "Everybody, everybody!"
THE END
Author Notes:
This is what happened in the future:
When Strong Bad "died", The Cheat became unpopular, for Strong Bad would help him get people's attention, so The Cheat died of a disease for being so unpopular. Strong Mad constantly mourned for The Cheat. With his two brothers out of the way, Strong Sad became cool, and the same thing happened to the King of Town (as well as encouraging him to diet) and Homsar. Because the King of Town was cool, he got a lot of money, and paid the Poopsmith $1,000,000 to break his vow of silence and have a cooler job, and that's a pretty good deal. Without the Poopsmith, the Unguraits invaded Free Country, USA, destroyed Pom-Pom's home and a little bit of Bubs' Concession Stand. Since Strong Bad wasn't there, they decided to not eat everyone else, for they hated Strong Bad. Then they lived in a cave house complex in Strongbadia. Because Pom-Pom lost his home, he lived in the Strongs house. Without Strong Bad to keep in control and Marzipan falling in love with Strong Sad, Homestar started to make out with the Tire, the lone survivor from Strongbadia.