Au Revoir

By YumeNeko

Disclaimer: "Au Revoir" is a song by Malice Mizer. Sanzo, Hakkai, Gensomaden Saiyuki, etc. belong to Minekura Kazuya-sensei. I'm only using them for mere non-profit purposes, so… Don't sue me. Have a nice day

This songfic is dedicated to the Sanzo x Hakkai Mailing List.

Cho Hakkai sat upon a bench one autumn day after the classes he taught at the nearby school. It had been a year since the end of his journey with his other three companions and somehow, he missed those joyous days. Everyone had been visiting him every now and then, though. But then, there was something more that he missed from those old days.

itsumo futari bun no hibiku ashigoto ga tsuzuiteta michi de
kare-hatete shimatta gairojutachi ga
ookiku natta hohaba o kitsukaseta

Along the street that had always echoed with our footsteps
The withered trees fading away down the road
Perceived the distance between the steps increase

Memories played behind the youkai's pleasant viridian eyes as he looked at the tranquil park, painted in the autumn colors so known to be warm amidst the chill accompanying the season.

He remembered his walks by his side, how their footsteps would echo softly in the silent scenery. And by unconscious drive, he would touch the other's hand lightly and gaze into his eyes, relaying a silent message with a warm smile to accentuate it.

Then the other would smile for a moment.

And, holding the rare smile close to his heart, the moment made him happy as they continued to walk.

kata ni sure chigau chiisana ochiba ga mata sora ni modotte
sonna fuki-sasabu kaze sae mo ima wa naze ka itoshikute
sotto hohouende ita

The small falling leaves passing by my shoulders once more returned to the sky
And then I somehow loved even the violent wind
Gently, I was smiling

Sometimes, the wind would play upon their features, and some autumn leaves would fall as well, creating enchantingly warm scenery.

Yet the mere fact that he was with him was enough to keep him warm.

Leaves were also dancing in the autumn air as Hakkai continued to reminisce in the present. Continuing to sit still, he kept quiet as he remembered that autumn warmth that was lost from him now.

madobe ni motareru minareta sugata ga
kageru hizashi ni utsushi-dasarete kieru
afureru omoi ni tsubuyaita kotoba wa
"semete yume ga sameru made"

Your familiar form leaning on the windowsill
Flickers among the hazy sunlight and disappears
A whispered phrase in my crowded memories says
"If only until I awake from this dream..."

Hazy sunlight passed through the autumn trees and more memories played behind the same viridian eyes. At times, that memory would remember that someone he loved, leaning upon a windowsill, gazing out into the noisy streets with a cigarette perched between his lips. His eyes would look out, as if pondering upon countless perceptions of the world and Hakkai would watch him lovingly, keeping to his heart that form of the man he loved and followed.

motto
anata o dakishime nemuritai
yasashii kioku ni kawaratta ima de sae mo
kono ude de dakishime nemuritai
deatta koro no futari no you ni

Just a while more
I want to fall asleep holding you
Even if only in this time changed by gentle memories
I want to fall asleep with you in my arms
Like we were when we first met

Nights used to be so warm, feeling his lover's presence near him. The present was just too cold to bear now. Yet still, dreams played in the back of the youkai's mind.

He held his beloved in his arms, and feeling that warmth washing over him again, he desired to sleep, basking in that feeling. And somehow, he wished that the dream would never end.

Yet, when he desired to hold tighter to the dream, it all collapsed and everything was cold once more. And so silently, in the dream, he wept, still wishing to hold his beloved in his arms once more.

madobe ni motarete zawameku
sotto tsubuyaku onaji kotoba o mou ichido...
ano toki no sugata ga mienaku natte mo
semete yume no naka dake wa

You lean against the windowsill and it rustles
And I hear the softly murmured phrase once more...
Even though I can't see your form like then
At least amidst this dream

Once again, in the autumn scene, the memory of his beloved by a windowsill came once more. Yet, something was wrong… His form wasn't all that clear anymore. But then, he heard his voice murmuring to him.

It called out his name… And reached for him…

motto
anata o dakishime nemuritai
yasashii kioku ni kawaratta ima de sae mo
kono ude de dakishime nemuritai
deatta koro no ano hi no mama no
futari no you ni

Just a while more
I want to fall asleep holding you
Even if only in this time changed by gentle memories
I want to fall asleep with you in my arms
Just like we were
That day we first met

Warmth washed over Hakkai as he felt the familiar arms around him. Overcome with gladness, tears welled up in his eyes as he returned the embrace to the vision. And as he did, he noticed…

The vision wasn't disappearing anymore.

Tears fell from the viridian eyes that were reminiscing. He had fallen to the ground, and somehow, he felt as if his soul was being torn away from his body. Yet, he smiled…

"… I told you I'd follow you forever…"

anata o dakishime nemuritai
kono ude de dakishime nemuritai

I want to fall asleep holding you
I want to fall asleep with you in my arms

Hakkai looked up in his vision and saw him. And, just as his memories had remembered, he was smiling. Just as before, the moment made him happy. But, they weren't held by time anymore…

"It's been a month since you've died, Sanzo…" Hakkai whispered to the vision.

"And still you decided to follow me?" The vision of blonde hair and plum eyes asked back at the spirit he held in his arms.

And all the answers were there in that silent gaze into the other's eyes as they both fell asleep in each others arms for eternity…