FINALE

Not quite a cave, Brennan decided. Caves didn't have plexi-glass walls that obscured vision into what was beyond. And people, even New Mutants, didn't get magically transported to caves through a beam-me-up-Scotty white light after nearly drowning in an exhilarating white water rapids sort of nightmare. Where had Jesse come up with this one? Not for the first time Brennan wished that he knew a little bit more of Jesse's past. Was this an episode from Jesse's childhood, replayed for the benefit of Mutant X? It almost looked like a giant sensory deprivation tank, from the inside. This might explain Jesse's claustrophobia, Brennan thought, as well as being a catalyst for his mutant gifts. Being stuck inside something like this would cause anyone with potential to develop the ability to phase through the walls in a heartbeat. Great training technique. Did Genomex ever use it on Jesse? Look at him sitting there on the floor, shivering, eyes closed. Not good. Gotta get you out of here, bro.

The walls were opaque. Brennan couldn't see out, and neither could any of his teammates as they explored their new surroundings with sight and touch. Brennan went to one side to try to determine where they were, and Shalimar to the other. Lexa took the far end, rapping on surface, shaking her head at the way the wall swallowed up the sound. There was precious little to explore. The walls were smooth and warm, with no distinguishing features. The air was sterile, with no intervening odors to give Mutant X any hint of where Jesse's brain might have taken them. Even the light was dim, giving a general feeling of nothingness. Nothing to see, nothing to hear, nothing to feel; the absence of everything.

Lexa put it into words. "Where are we?"

"Beats me." Shalimar gave the pseudo-plastic a kick. Nothing cracked. Nothing happened. "Jesse?"

The molecular looked tired, sitting on the floor, arms wrapped around his knees. Even thinking was an effort now. "I don't know. I don't recognize this place. Never been here, not even in my dreams." He tilted his head back against the smooth wall, closing his eyes again.

But Lexa had seen something that scared her. She crossed to her team mate and knelt beside him. "Jesse?"

"What?" Weary, with a go-away wish as an undercurrent.

"Let me look at you." Lexa pushed his knees out of the way, exposing his chest. The others crowded around, and they could all see it: the area where the proton coupler had been, where the bullet had struck the man, was now spreading. No one needed expensive medical equipment to see that the massed area was growing like a cancer. It was obvious that Jesse was losing the battle. "Jesse!"

Jesse winced. "I know. Don't remind me."

"But you have to unmass those areas! What do you think we're trying to do here?" Lexa found it hard to keep from screaming at the man. She compromised by grabbing his shoulder so hard that he tried to pull away.

Brennan intervened; Lexa was ready to lose it altogether. "Work with us, man. Remember how we did this before. You and me, in the lava pit. You didn't give up then, and we're not going to let you give up now."

But even as he spoke, a door opened in one end of the cavernous womb. Light spilled out, a glorious light that bathed all of the New Mutants in a warmly welcoming glow. Brennan shielded his eyes; the light was too bright to see anything past, but what lay beyond was clearly a better place than where they currently were.

They were all drawn to it, to the escape from the horror that Jesse's mind had become. The light promised hope and happiness, comfort and contentment. It was entirely natural that they lifted Jesse to his feet, steadying him between them, guiding him toward the promise of bright recovery. As a group they found their steps bringing them closer and closer, all four of them.

"Brennan! Shalimar! Lexa!" Dr. Robinson's voice snapped sharply from the other end of the pseudo-cave, the dark side. They paused; Lexa beamed a hand light to show another door that had mysteriously appeared there as well, a shadowy companion to the first. They could barely see the outline of the doctor beyond that clear door, yet it was clear that Dr. Robinson was frantic. She beat a desperate staccato to get their attention. "Brennan! Shalimar! Lexa! You have to come out immediately! Hurry!"

Brennan came to himself, and his blood ran cold. He knew what was happening. It had almost happened once before. He grabbed Shalimar and Lexa by the arms, stopping their forward momentum. "Guys! We have to pull Jesse back!"

"Huh?" It was like talking to the pair on drugs. "Why? That's where we want to go." Shalimar pointed at the door with the light. "That's the nice place. It feels right, Brennan. It's a good place. We need to take Jesse there. We should all go there."

"Shalimar, no! Jesse's dying! Dr. Robinson is telling us that if we don't get out, then we'll die along with him! We can't go there! We have to go back to where Dr. Robinson is!"

Shalimar shook herself, coming around. "Brennan?" Realization finally dawned. Her eyes widened, and she reacted. "Lexa! Snap out of it, girl!" She slapped the chromatic, slapped her again until sense returned.

If Lexa had tears in her eyes, then she refused to let the others know it, dashing them away with a harsh flick of her wrist. She swallowed hard, realizing what was happening far faster than any of the rest once she had come to herself. "Is that what I think it is?"

"Yes." Brennan grabbed hold of Jesse. The molecular was continuing to walk slowly toward the light unassisted, a sense of wonder and joy on his face. "Jesse, come back."

But when Jesse turned to face him, to face all of Mutant X, there was no sorrow on his face and the look of exhaustion had vanished. "Brennan." He shifted his gaze to the others. "Shalimar. Lexa." He smiled. "It's okay. It's okay to leave me here. I'm ready."

"Well, I'm not," Brennan retorted. "Jesse, do you know what that is? What it represents?"

"Yes." Jesse nodded. He gestured toward the light. "Listen, all of you. Thanks for trying, but it's time for me to leave you. Please go to Dr. Robinson. Thank her for me as well, will you?"

"Jesse, you can't!" Shalimar pleaded. "Jesse, we need you! You can't go like this!"

"Jesse, we've been here before. Don't give up, man!" Brennan pleaded. "Jesse, I haven't worked this hard just to have you wuss out on me. Get back over here!" He cast about in desperation. "We've got more basketball to play. Don't give up!"

Jesse smiled sadly. "It's not about giving up, Brennan, it's about going to the right place." He gestured to the light. "That's where I belong now. You guys don't get to go there yet. Someday you will, but not yet. I'll be waiting for you." He hugged Shalimar, gently wiping away the tears that sprang to his big sister's eyes.. "You'll do just fine without me, Shal. You did before you met me, and you will again. You're survivors, Shal, you and Brennan. Even you, Lexa. Of all of us, you're the one who needed me the least. Good-bye, Lexa." He held out his hand in farewell.

"You're wrong there, Jesse." Lexa was the most surprised by the angry words that came out of her mouth, more surprised than any of the others. She slapped his hand away. "Damn you, did you think that I wanted to feel this way about you? You, with those puppy dog eyes that get hurt whenever I tell you to be quit being so naïve and believing in the people? The way I push you around just to take advantage of your good nature, just because I can? Maybe you can forgive what I've done to you, Jesse, but I can't forgive you! I won't ever forgive you leaving!"

It was still a sad smile, with a small shrug. "I can't help you there, Lexa. I can only hope that someday you'll be able to forgive yourself for all the times when everything you had wasn't enough to make things come out right." Jesse glanced into the light, seeing something that no one else could see. His face lit up. "Leo forgives you, Lexa. And so do I." He took a step backward, a step closer to the light filled exit. "Guys, you have to hurry. I don't know how much longer I can stay here for you. Please, go to Dr. Robinson. Go home, so that I can."

"Good-bye, Jesse." Shalimar could barely speak through the tears.

"I won't forget you, bro."

"I will," Lexa snarled. This time the tears went unheeded. "Dammit, Jesse, I'll forget you, and forget you, and keep on forgetting until there's nothing left!" She stormed to the door where Dr. Robinson waited impatiently and yanked.

Nothing. The door wouldn't open. Lexa turned around, fear written plainly on her face. "Jesse?"

Jesse was still being drawn back toward the light. "Hurry, Lexa. Hurry, Brennan and Shalimar."

"Jesse, the door won't open!"

"What do you mean?" Brennan crossed swiftly to the dark end of the cave. He hauled on the door. It wouldn't budge. He cast a glance back at Jesse; the molecular was a bare three paces from the light-filled exit. There wasn't much time. "Stand back," he ordered. He twisted his hands together, creating a blast of electricity and hurling it at the exit.

Nothing.

Shalimar turned back to Jesse. "Jesse, the door won't open!"

"Jesse, you can't leave!" Brennan added hastily. "Remember what Dr. Robinson said? If you die while we're in here, we all die!"

Jesse paused. "I don't want you to die." Thoughtfully, methodically. Rational consideration.

"Then help us! Phase us out of here!"

Jesse looked back into the light. It was there, beckoning, extending a little tendril to coax him in. He sighed.

Brennan seized the opportunity. "You can't let us die in here, Jesse. It's all up to you now."

"I can't hold on any longer." Jesse leaned his head against the hot rock face. A fiery tongue of lava lapped upward, licking hungrily at his heels.

"Jesse, fight it!"

But Jesse lost his precarious hand hold. With a despairing cry, he slipped down the slippery rock face. "Let me go!"

Brennan grabbed his wrist. His arm almost ripped loose from its socket, but he held on desperately. "No! Not a chance! If you die, I die!"

He could see the determination creep back ontoJesse's face. "I don't want you to die."

His friend and teammate--his brother--took a fresh hold of the slippery rock face, and heaved himself back, one inch at a time.

I don't want you to die.

Shalimar grabbed Jesse's arm as he approached the dark side of the cave, Brennan adding his strength. The molecular seemed to grow more weary and ill as he moved toward them, away from the light, the pair all but holding him up on his feet when he arrived at the dark door that refused to open. The amorphous mass on Jesse's chest pulsed and throbbed, trying to keep the molecular from responding to his friends, trying to turn the New Mutant's power against him. Shalimar wedged herself under Jesse's arm, Brennan taking the other shoulder, walking Jesse forward until they had him at the dark door where Lexa waited. Jesse leaned against Brennan, his head drooping against the elemental's broad chest.

"C'mon, Jesse, you can do it," Shalimar urged.

"Stay with us, man," Brennan added. "We need you. We've always needed you."

"And I've always needed you." It was tough for Jesse to admit, but it was the truth. "Guys, I don't know if I can do this. I'm so tired."

"You can do it." Lexa's eyes shone with pleading. "You've never let us down, Jesse." She took a deep breath. "You've never let me down. Let us help you now." Lexa helped Jesse lift up his hands to the door, placing them against the blackened surface. "We're all here. We're all here with you to help."

But it was Jesse who exhaled, and phased.

"On the count of three, cough." Dr. Robinson had her hand securing the tube that had been forced down Jesse's throat, helping him to breath. "One, two, three." Jesse coughed, and the tube slipped out, guided by the doctor's hand. Shalimar immediately pushed an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth, heedless of the continued coughing. Jesse wheezed, drawing in precious air, closing his eyes with exhaustion.

Dr. Robinson surveyed the monitors. "Looks good, Jesse. No massing, everything is clear. We'll keep a close watch on you for the next several days. " She noticed him moving his lips. "No, don't try to talk. Nothing will come out fora few hours and you'll have a sore throat for several days after that. Just try to relax for a while longer. Let us do the work."

Jesse nodded, licking his dry lips. He winced. Lexa caressed Jesse's forehead, gently pushing the sweat-drenched hair back. Jesse's eyes levered themselves open at her touch, but it took far too long for her visage to become focused. He blinked. More reality crashed in, and he tried to tell her something. The mask got in the way, and Lexa had to guess. "Hurting, Jess?"

A bare nod. It was all the man could manage. Brennan placed a reassuring hand on Jesse's shoulder. "Dr. Robinson just gave you something for the pain. You should be feeling better any minute."

A ghost of a smile, and his eyes drifted shut again under the influence of the narcotics. Brennan bit his lip. This had been a closer call than any before and Brennan wouldn't feel right until he was certain that Jesse would recover. Dr. Robinson said that he would, but—isn't that what she said the last time? Yet this time Brennan couldn't help the sneaking hope that the worst was over. No more, bro. I don't think I can go through this again.

Lexa had seen Jesse on the clinic bio-bed more than once, unconscious more than once, and she'd never yet gotten used to the sight of Jesse being wired for sound. Tubes in his nose, down his throat, needles in his arms; the man was still tied down with medical equipment and Dr. Robinson had done the tying. It had to have hurt the doctor, this deliberate inflicting of pain even to cure, and for an empath it would be torture. How could Dr. Robinson stand it? She looked subdued, Lexa thought. No, not subdued—haunted. Lexa herself hadn't been able to stop the tears as she held Jesse down for the doctor, grateful that the others couldn't see her own pain over this man that she cared about so deeply. 'Cared about'? Don't you mean 'love', Lexa?

No. We're not going to go there. Not yet. Maybe not ever. That way lies trouble.

Shalimar obviously had the same thought about the doctor, for she said, "What's wrong? Isn't getting him off these machines a good thing?"

Dr. Robinson managed a weak smile. "A very good thing. He's on the road to health. He won't be himself for a few weeks, but he should recover fully in time."

"Then what's wrong?" Brennan asked. "Doc?" he pushed when the empath was slow to answer. "You said he's going to be okay, right? Full recovery? Eventually?"

Dr. Robinson nodded. "Eventually," she echoed. She sighed, coming to a decision, coming to her confession. "I broke my oath."

"What oath?" Lexa refused to give up possession of Jesse's hand. Later, when he was awake, she would deny ever being here, but for now…

"My Hippocratic oath. First, do no harm," Dr. Robinson quoted. "I broke it. Irrevocably, and forever."

Brennan came around the bio-bed, also putting a hand on Jesse's shoulder, needing the tactile comfort of knowing the man was alive. "I don't get it, doc. We're all here, all of us, alive and kicking. Mostly kicking," he amended with an apologetic glance toward the bio-bed. "You didn't do any harm that I can see."

"Oh, but I did." Dr. Robinson couldn't meet their eyes. "You remember, in that final place, where Jesse wanted to move on? To die?"

"I remember." Like any of them would ever forget in this lifetime.

"He told you to leave."

"That's right," Lexa said evenly. "You told us the same thing. You tried to get us out before it was too late."

Dr. Robinson bit her lip. "Not exactly."

"What do you mean, not exactly?"

"I held the escape door closed," Dr. Robinson blurted out. "I kept it closed, and almost killed all of you, trying topersuade Jesse to come back with you. I took a gamble that he wouldn't let you die: threefor one. I risked three lives that I had no right to risk in the hope of saving just one. I should have pulled you all out. I almost killed you!"

There was an uncomfortable moment of silence while the three members of Mutant X digested what the doctor had just told them. Then, to everyone's astonishment—including her own—Lexa was the first to break the silence.

"It was worth the risk."