It's There.
Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki.
He couldn't really sleep now, even if he wanted too. He kept his eyes wide as he watched Sanzo sleeping. Goku reminded himself that this gun-wielding Priest had protected him, shielding him with his own body. Tears began to flow down the side of his face quietly. He wiped them away with his sleeve and sniffed. Goku had promised himself that he would never let harm come to Sanzo, because Goku owed him.
But now Goku couldn't do that, he had failed.
"I didn't mean to...Sanzo." He whispered slowly. "I owe you my everything and I promised to protect you, and I......I couldn't."
Goku reached down and brushed away Sanzo's bangs to see the ruby jewel. He realized then, that he knew nothing about Sanzo, only what people have rumored. Sanzo never told him anything, he felt like a little kid before Christmas. Sanzo was like a present and Goku wanted to wrapped him. Find out what he was thinking, is he more than a gun and a altitude?
"You know what Sanzo? You're a mystery." Goku whispered again. "Like a Ghost almost." He smiled fondly at the still figure.
Sanzo was close enough to Goku's heart as any father would be to a son. Only Goku didn't think of Sanzo as a father, it's odd like that. Sanzo's always been that close to him since Goku laid first sight on his hand.
"Sanzo? Do you remember when you saved me?" Goku asked leaning onto his propped up knee, tears still in motion. "I remember the shadow of your body, blocking the sun. And I looked up to see your hand being held out to me." Goku reached his hand out to Sanzo. "I wanting to grab your hand and be pulled into a hug that I felt protected, saved and almost loved. Enough though I didn't get the hug itself, I still feel those. Well all except one, love, I can tell I annoy you and embarrass you but there's something there. Hakkai told me fondness but it's stronger than that."
Through his blurry vision Goku saw two hands reach out to him and pull him forward. He was half asleep when he landed softly next a very awake Sanzo. As the blond Priest wrapped his lanky arms around Goku's small form and held him close, the tired teen passed out. He almost lost his emotional hold when Goku sighed happily against him in his sleep.
"It's there, idiot, it's there."
owari
Author's note: I thought it was too cute how Goku watched Sanzo sleeping in the second(?) volume of the manga. So I decided to tweak the outcome a bit. Please be gentle on reviews!