A/N: Alright, I gotta keep moving. If I'm persistent, I can finish this just in time for Christmas!!
Crash: Cool! (turns back to the wall) Now, watch Cortex, we hang the stocking like this…
Cortex: (shoots stocking with blaster, cause a bit of an explosion)
Crash: Oo (is all burnt)
Cortex: (chuckling) Whoops, my bad! I meant to put it on adhesive!
Crash: T.T;;
XD Chappie time!
The Secretest Santa: Chapter 5: Present Gathering
Link woke up early next morning. Quickly grabbing a latte and a croissant, he climbed into his car and drove off towards the mall. It seemed rather unnecessary, for the mall was quite close, but he knew he would need all the cargo space he could use in it.
Arriving early, he got a good parking space right by the entrance. He then leaped out of the car and prepared himself for an all-day shopping extravaganza.
Thankfully, the mall opened very early in the morning, and all the shops were open and at his disposal. But his first priority at the moment was over at the Woman's Boutique.
Link entered the store and made his way to the back counter. There was the same woman, and she was fast asleep. He smiled and cleared his throat loudly, waking her up.
"Oh… A bit early, aren't you?" she yawned.
Link looked up at the nearest clock. It read 6:45.
He grinned sheepishly at the woman. "Hehe… Wanted to get it as soon as possible!"
The woman smiled. "Well, alright, lemme get out your dress…" She looked below the counter, then gasped. "It's not here! Somebody moved it!"
Link's heart rose to his throat. "W-WHAT!?"
"The staff!" She snapped her fingers in realization. "They clean up the store every night during closing time! They must've found the dress and hung it back on the rack!"
Link immediately rushed back to the front of the store and quickly found the dress. But as he grabbed it, another hand grabbed it at the same time. A delicate, petite hand with bright red, glossy fingernails that looked as though they were pasted on.
Link looked up and identified his opponent. This woman seemed very self-conscious of her outward appearance, with a four-hour hairdo and looking like she put her makeup on with a paintbrush. Everything on her- hair, makeup, and clothes- was absolutely perfect and glamorous. In Link's personal opinion, however, she looked more like a clown than a beautiful model woman.
She stared him down with an attempt of a vicious scowl, but it turned out looking like she was posing for an imaginary cameraman. It took everything Link had to keep himself from laughing.
She tugged lightly. "Let go," she growled, her voice sounding very similar to that of Marilyn Monroe. "It's mine."
"It is not!" Link retorted, tugging back.
"I saw it first!"
Other women began to notice them, and the two began drawing a crowd.
Link sighed, trying to be polite. "Listen, I reserved this yesterday for my girlfriend, and there was a little mistake in the clean-up department. Long story short, I technically saw it first, and therefore, it's technically mine."
The women in the crowd slowly agreed, nodding in approval.
The glamour-puss was unmoved. "Oh, boo hoo. As you can tell, this is an exquisite item, and only one possessing such beauty as I is worthy of the dress, so it makes perfect sense for me to posses it, rather than whatever ugly poser you have as a girlfriend!"
This statement set off a spark of aggravation, and Link couldn't help but twitch. He was becoming angry.
"Now let go of it!" she demanded.
Oh, no. Link wasn't going to let her go that easily. He tried reasoning, and now he was mad. "Like hell I'll let go!" he shouted.
The women gasped, and the glamour-puss regarded him darkly.
"Now you listen to me!" Link growled dangerously, pointing a deadly finger. "I've been busting my ass, getting up at 6 'o clock in the morning to get this dress for my girlfriend! And I'm not letting anybody get in my way! I ain't afraid to hit girls, especially you! If you get in my way, I won't even resist pulling your hair, messing your makeup, or even breaking one of your 'precious' nails!! Do I make myself absolutely clear!?"
A hush fell over the crowd. The woman scowled, then tossed the dress at his chest.
"Fine, take it, then!" she spat. "It's ugly, anyway!"
Link propped it over his shoulder. "If that's what you thought, you should've given it to me in the first place!"
The glamour-puss huffed, turning away in disgust.
Link calmly strolled through the awestricken women to the back counter, placing to dress on top. The woman smiled at him.
"I've seen a lot of fights over clothes," she said. "But never one of that nature. But all that matters is you won, and not too many men can do that. Well done."
A small, modest applause cycled through the store, much to Link's surprise. Then it broke off, and the women went back to their shopping.
"Lemme ring this up for you," the woman took the dress and handled it with care. "So, how's she doing?"
"Managing, managing," Link responded, finally glad this mess was over with and he could relax a bit more.
"Yeah, it's kinda hard to say you're 'good' when you've got your days numbered," she said gloomily. "Here, I'll even remove the tags for you."
"That'd be great, thanks."
"Y'know," she motioned with her sisters. "If I were God, I'd get rid of all the diseases out there, starting from the top of the alphabet- AIDS, Alzheimer's…"
"Yeah, me too," Link replied truthfully, leaning on the counter casually. "And, y'know, it's enough with all the murders and wars and drunk driving…"
"Yeah, we've got enough death already." She snipped through a piece of plastic. "Oh, well, some things you just can't change…"
Link paid for the dress (finally), and the woman folded it up nicely, put it in a box and placed it in Link's arms.
"Thank again. She'll really like this," Link thanked as he began to leave.
The woman nodded. "Your very welcome. Merry Christmas!"
"Yeah, Merry Christmas!" And with that, he stepped out of the store. But then he froze on the spot, realizing a few things.
I conversated with a complete stranger, I said "Merry Christmas" and meant it, and by Din's Fire, I yelled at a woman over a dress!
At first, he thought he'd gone totally crazy, but then he looked at the box in his hands and remembered why he did all those things. And when he would see the look of happiness on Zelda's face when she sees her new dress, it would've all been worth it.
And there were other people to please besides her. And if I'm gonna do that, he thought. I'd better get my ass in gear!
So he rushed around the mall, buying everything he had written in his little list. There were several times when his arms would get too full of boxes, and he had to go out to his car and unload the gifts in the back seat. Then he'd lock up the car again and rush back into the mall to get more things.
He went into nearly every store inside the mall: the Sports Center, the Kid's Clothes, the Electronics Store, the Toy Shoppe, the Book Store, the Spiritual Store, everywhere! He ran all over the place, grabbing gift after gift.
By noon, he brought out his last load and put it on the passenger's seat, for the back seat row was all filled up. Link's feet were aching and his body demanded rest, but it would have to wait until he got back at the Mansion.
He parked in the rear garage, avoiding the view of anyone else. Then, taking a few packages into his arms, he opened the back door and slinked through the hallways to his dorm, placing them in the back corner. He went back and forth, taking each gift into his room until he had emptied out the car and had everything safely in his dorm. It was a miracle that no one else was roaming the dorm halls at the time.
With that done, Link collapsed on his bed, totally exhausted. He was so tired, but glad that the hardest part of this whole thing was over.
Link had a couple minutes of rest before a soft knock rapped against his locked door.
"Link?" a soft, female voice called. "Are you in there?"
Link sat up fearfully, looking at the pile of things in the corner. He couldn't let anyone see all that!
"Uh, yeah, just a minute, Zelda!" he replied, throwing a blanket over the pile. He then rushed to the door, unlocked it, and opened it to face his girlfriend with a big, stupid grin on his face. "Hey, Zelda."
"Hello," Zelda slightly smiled, maintaining her worried look. "Where have you been all morning?"
Link sighed tiredly. "Out."
"Again?"
"Yeah," Link let her in, then flopped down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling sleepily.
"Aw…" Zelda sat down next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "You've been tiring yourself out! What on earth have you been doing?"
Link sighed. "I can't tell you," he said honestly.
Surprisingly, Zelda accepted this, and smiled. "Oh, I get it. Secret Santa, hmm?"
Link nodded, yawning.
"Okay, then, I won't bother you about it." She stood. "You want some lunch?"
"Sure," Link replied tiredly. "Could you go get it for me? Anything warm will do, just no eggnog."
Zelda nodded. "Be right back!" And with that, she left him alone.
Link sighed in exhaustion and rolled over, enjoying the company of his pillow. He looked over at the lump of presents hidden under a big, fluffy blanket, realizing something.
"Aw, man," he moaned to himself. "I forgot the wrapping paper!" But he was too exhausted to really care, burying his face in his pillow. "Ah, I'll do it later…" he decided lazily, enjoying his rest. The gifts were all bought, and that's what mattered.
A/N: So? Hmm? HMM??
Cortex: Very nice. (discharges his weapon, shooting glowing garland that wraps around the Christmas tree)
Crash: Awesome, Cortex!
Cortex: Hehe… That feels kinda good… :)
YAY!! Review!!!
Crash and Cortex: REVIEW!!! :D