Title: Alucard's Acquaintance
Chap. 5: No Peace For Vampires
Author: Kreuz Swords
Disclaimer: Once again I am slow updating v.v If someone missed the big bad writer warning on my bio, my grammar is for the dogs P The wacky plot is mine and the characters are not mine…
Dedication: Thanks to Mel-chan for staying with me and prodding my plot muses to see if they were still alive on this fic. (Cool, I have a beta X3)
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The night guards switched shifts with the day guards at the front gates of the Hellsing estate. Dying rays of the setting sun bathed the mansion in a red-violet glow. As the natural lights dimmed, electric lights came to life one by one and a few inside the mansion. Inside the main office room, Sir Integral Hellsing peacefully sat at her large oak desk filled with paperwork. A slender cigar smoldered in a silver ashtray as the smoke danced about into the air. Everything else went on routinely with little noise. But, there were loud rave music emanating from a hallway in the servant section from a certain bathroom. A young green-eyed man with long black hair and a light red eyed girl with short red-blond hair stood before the bathroom mirror. The two were partially dressed and grooming themselves for a leisure night out on the town. The rave music came from a small radio on a self as the pair elbowed each other for the space in front of the mirror.
Suddenly, a shadowy form materialized halfway from the unseen depths of the bathroom mirror before the pair. A vampire without his usual floppy red hat, sprung forth with no warning, ginning wildly.
"What are you two doing on this fine night?!" questioned Alucard with a large grin and a gleam in his hauntingly red eyes over his orange-red sunglasses. His appearance before the two caught them completely unaware.
"Aahhhh….!!!!" Screamed the two younger vampires in unison. Their reaction even surprised Alucard. Their frightful echoing screams spread throughout the Hellsing mansion.
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In Sir Hellsing's office, Integral heard the Banshee wails. She reacted by pressing too hard on her pen, causing the ink to splatter, and she reached for her gun while her lips tighten around the cigar. When Integral did not hear anymore screaming and no alarms went on alert, she frowned and puffed out smoke in disgust.
"You think stone walls would be enough to keep out unwanted noises," grumbled Integral, and she pulled out a new piece of paper and pen.
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"You are a complete pervert, master!!" raged Seras as she covered herself and glared at Alucard.
"Al, you rake! (1)" yelled Lewis as he covered himself and glowered at the grinning vampire sticking out of the mirror.
"What ever is the matter? It is not like something I have not seen before," said the No Life King mockingly and he laughed displaying his fangs.
Lewis and Seras glanced at each other and thought at the same moment to declare war on Alucard. Before the unwanted vampire knew what was going to happen, Seras and Lewis launched an attack using everything in the bathroom to toss at the Tom-peeking vampire. Alucard quickly faded back into the mirror to escape the assault.
Alucard slunk through the shadowy stone wall in another hallway. He snickered to himself for a bit.
"Oh my, my, I must have hit a nerve with those two. He took off his sunglasses dotted with toothpaste. The tall vampire rubbed his cheek and discovered he had pink lipstick on his face. "Ak, female war paint!" Alucard rubbed off the lipstick with distaste.
Walter opened a door nearby and walked into the hallway. The old retainer saw Alucard's rumpled appearance and removing pink lipstick.
"Is there something wrong Lord Alucard?" inquired Walter.
"No, there is no reason to be alarmed. Police Girl and our visitor got over emotional." The tall vampire straightens himself to his full height.
"Lord Alucard, may I inform you that you have a glittery purple butterfly clip in your hair," said Walter in a calm manner.
"What?! A butterfly hair clip!!" exploded the No Life King. Alucard dug at his hair to remove the offensive item. He ripped out the purple glittered clip from his hair. The vampire wasted no time in pulverizing the butterfly clip under his boot heel like it was a nasty bug. Alucard felt through his hair again to find if there were any more clips. "Akk! What in bloody hell is this sticky trash in my hair?!" Alucard rubbed at the gooey mess in his hair and made part of his hair spike out.
"The sticky substance in your hair appears to be styling gel, sir" answered the elderly retainer calmly. "The gel will come out in warm water. If you do not need any further assistance from me, Lord Alucard, I will continue my nightly duty."
"You are free to go to your nightly haunting, Walter," said Alucard as made grotesque faces at his hair that had gel on it. "Why would humans put this sticky mess in their hair?" wondered the No Life King to himself. He scowled with displeasure.
As Walter passed by Alucard, his nose caught the sent of a flowery aroma coming from the tall vampire. "Is that perfume I smell, sir?" said the loyal retainer and turned to Alucard with a puzzled expression on his face.
"Have a good night Walter." Replied the vampire in a monotone voice.
Walter gave a slight bow and quietly walked away.
"Just peachy, I bet Walter now thinks I cross dress," grumbled the No Life King and slipped back into the shadows.
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Seras hopped down the front steps. She wore a halter-top and boot cut pants with an Union Jack theme. Lewis followed her to his car. He was dressed in a violet poet shirt and black leather pants. Both had on sunglasses to hide the unnatural color of their eyes.
As they passed the barracks, Captain Pip was standing outside having a smoke. He noticed the two undead figures.
"Well, what do we have here. A monster girl and her flowery guy friend all fancy dressed and posh tonight." Pip snickered at the pair.
"Laugh all you want idiot. We are going out clubbing tonight." Seras hugged Lewis' arm and glared at the eye patched man.
" Capitaine (Captain) Pip, please stop calling me derogatory names. My Christian name is Lewis."
"Whatever…" Pip ambled off to another spot to smoke.
"Come mon cheire, the night awaits us." The French-American vampire escorted Seras to his dark green BMW convertible in the parking garage.
Lewis drove out quietly from the Hellsing estate, and Seras enjoyed the night air as it played over her body. All her worries seemed to disappear as she took in the night sights and smells.
"So Lewis, where are we going to?"
"To a club I know of in the Soho area. Located on Charing Cross."
"Cool, fine by me. By the way luv, where are you from in America and who is your master Tatsel? Is he a human or a vampire?"
Lewis lightly smiled and replied, "I am from New Orleans. Tatsel is very much a vampire as he claims the very best in being a vampire. I think he lives to get into the strangest trouble. Those who know him well call him the Brat Prince. But, he is very dangerous if he is provoked."
"Oh, you sound like you really love him."
"In a way cheire I do, but Tatsel can be annoying and selfish. Spending some time away from him shall do me some good. I shall return to him on my own terms or when he needs me."
"Why have you turned a hand against your own kind? You don't seem to be a chap that would do such a thing by your manner."
"I lost someone very dear to me to the Paris coven of vampires and waged revenge on them for killing her." Lewis remained silent for awhile.
Seras felt he needed time to put away bad past memories. "I'm sorry if I was over prying."
"Don't feel guilty about it. I heard you were a police detective or something? I noted that Alucard kept on calling you police girl."
"Yes when I was alive. Master wants to keep on reminding me on who I was."
"I ran a plantation when I was alive, and I still make a little money on the side. There is nothing written that you can not stay as a detective, Seras. Just think it as transferring to special section. Detective skills are a bit like hunting skills to me."
"I guess soo..."and Seras sighed.
Lewis drove around in London and found a parking spot. The two continued on foot to the club that the black haired vampire knew of. They stood in a line for the club.
Seras viewed the busy streets illuminated by multicolored lights. She noted that it had been a long while since she had been out to have fun. The last time Seras had been out was when she was human and before she went into police training. Sure she hanged out with the guys, but not on an outing to crowded areas.
"Why are you frowning mon cheire? I really must say that frowns do not suit your face." Lewis almost touched Seras' arm, but he thought to better not to. His sunglasses reflected a sadden girl.
"Oh, I was thinking of my friends I use to hang out with. Now, I am alone and not really alive any more…"
"Seras, I count you as a friend. Even more so than Alucard shall ever be to me. So, do not feel lonely now that we have met."
"Thanks Lewis", and Seras brushed away a tear before it escaped.
"Ah, it is our turn to enter this club…" Lewis paid their way in and Seras followed him. The club was bust inside. There was a large bar and humans were dancing on the open floor area. Lewis spotted some barstools that were vacant, and they perched upon the them.
Seras began to feel something odd about the human crowd. Then a man dressed as a woman sashayed by her. It dawned on her that they were surrounded by gay men. Seras took a moment to find the club's name and learned they were at the Heaven, which was renowned for being a gay nightclub.
"Lewis luv, we are at a gay club", whispered the police girl into the other vampire's ear.
"Oh? What is a gay club?"
Seras became dumbfounded, but she didn't feel up to explaining what is gay culture to an old-fashioned vampire while in the club. "Do you know of another club we can go to?"
"Humm…", and Lewis placed a pale finger on his lips in thought. "There is a club called Coleherne…"
"Have you noticed anything out of the norm at this club", asked Seras to make sure it was not another gay club.
Lewis bunched up his brows, "I have seen some men dressed in tight leather clothing that I counted as odd.
"That club won't do either. Let me show you the way to another club named Ministry of Sound." Seras left the club, dragging the clueless bi vampire by the arm out the door and back to his car. She gave him directions to a bridge that crossed the Thames River.
At the dance music club, they had a smashing good time there. The two danced some new moves and talked about random subjects. Their worries disappeared to the four winds while they mingled at the club. But, all good moments must come to an end when it was time for the two vampires to go home.
Lewis drove the car back over to another bridge. Then Seras saw signs for the Victoria Embankment Garden and begged her companion to take a breather on a park bench and admire the night view. Lewis agreed and parked his car near the garden.
Seras led the way to a bench near the riverbank and plopped down, followed by Lewis in a more gentlemanly way.
"Look Lewis, the sky is beautiful tonight", and she continued to gaze up in wonder.
Lewis peered in the direction that Seras had and saw the waning moon near Cleopatra's Needle and the water glisten up to the stars above.
Their tranquil moment was shattered when they heard gunfire followed by vocal yelling. The vampires' startlement soon switched to irritation as they heard a mini war being played out nearby.
"What now?!" growled Seras.
"It never fails…"
"Every time I want to have true quiet moment to myself…"
"There is no peace even for the undead!" groaned Lewis.
Then they hear the fighting coming nearer and sat stock still as three men were chased by a woman in priest robes with guns, and a nun with a katana ran passed them.
"One time Lewis, I was in the shower and the emergency alert went off. My master nabbed me before I could cover myself with no more than a washcloth. I had to kick him many times until I got him to stop long enough to let me get dressed." grumbled the girl.
"Once, Tatsel was in one his rare loving moods and we were about to cuddle. Right then that bookworm of a Davi walks in on us, and it ruined the moment with my master. I felt like burning Davi's vampire chronicles right then and there." Complained Lewis.
The two heard more fighting and dying sounds into the night sky.
"Hey, maybe if we pretend to be moonlight lovers in a park, you think they would ignore us", Seras scooted closer to the other vampire and lay her head on his shoulder.
"Well, look what we have here…two demonic sinners", sneered Heinkel Wolfe while the vampires' eyes grew large. Ms. Wolfe in her priestly robes aimed her guns at their heads. Her nun partner got ready to pounce on the new targets by Heinkel side.
"Madame, we are all god fearing creatures and can we converse our grievances in a more civilized manner?" negotiated Lewis.
"What do you think, Yumie?"
"Let them burn in the fiery pits of hell… My pretty thirsts for their blood." and the nun grinned in the most unholy way.
"The verdict is in. My grace be with you all, Amen…"
"Whatever happen to the days where a man could just duel with swords at a set time honorably…", and Lewis sighed.
"This bloody well sucks!"
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It was now close to the night turning to dawn. A green BMW convertible parked itself into the Hellsing garage. Two disheveled figures stumbled out and slowly staggered together toward the castle mansion. Rose petals and branch bits covered the vampires. Their clothes were torn here and there as well. Lewis had more blood on him than Seras had.
"Home at last…and glad to be still in one piece…", said Seras
"I think that was the first time I got gun shot", said Lewis as he winced when he touched his bloody shoulder.
"Well, I didn't ask you to take a bullet for me."
"It would have been ungentlemanly of me. Besides, my body can take more punishment than yours can take now. I fear Al would have tanned my hide if you perished."
"The only thing I am worried about is the damaged we and the two nutters caused to the rose garden. Hopefully Sir Hellsing does not connect the news report to us."
"It was odd that we ended up playing hide and seek in the rose bushes…"
"What flower truck decided to improve your looks!", said Pip as he was out for a smoke with a large coffee mug in hand. "I really refuse to think the two of you would go off to roll around in the hay…" and Pip shivered as his imagination came up with vivid scenes.
"Bon jour Capitaine Pip…" (Good morning Captain)
"Shut up you blooming idiot!"
"Whatever you say monster girl", and Pip rolled his eye and took a swig of his coffee.
"Come mon cheire, I have to be in shadows when the sun rises."
"Or, we will have a burnt fruitcake on our hands", and Pip smirked.
"Captain Pip, I would advise you desist in your unpleasant banter toward Lewis. Do remember he is a full vampire and can kill you in a blink of an eye if he feels provoked to do so," informed Alucard as he moved sinuously up behind the eye patched captain and gave a predatorial grin. The No Life King glided over to his ilk as Pip dropped his coffee in startlement. "It appears you had a lovely night," and he laughed a little. "My my, police girl, a rose on you is very befitting." The tall vampire silently headed for his resting-place while Sears held her tongue as she followed her master and friend into mansion.
TBC… Reviews shall remind me to write more XD
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Author notes and End takes:
Rake; a dissolute, debauched man
Kreuz Swords: Finally finished chapter 5 of this fic XD; And, oh look makes it now that I can't make some of my letter faces and certain spacing. Worst yet is that I cannot use the star as story shift markers X( Anyway, I went back and fixed the oops parts on the posted chapters and yeah changed what won't show like the STAR, which books use and I have use the X… It looks like I shall wrap up this fic up in the next chapter. I am open to ideas to put into the plot and you might get more chapters out of me XD
Lewis: (Reading Forb's guide to London) Seras, did you know that one of the beheaded wives of Henry XVIII still haunts the castle holding her severed head on her hip?
Seras: Spooky o.o
Integral: (Snorts) Quite likely to get her deadbeat husband a heart attack. Serves him tho…
Alucard: (Comes out of the shadows carrying his detached head.) Lewis, does it say which hip she used?
Lewis & Seras: Ahhhhh!! OoO OoO (They grab onto Sir Hellsing for protection)
Integral: (Fumes) Bad Vampire, Bad! X(
Alucard: What?! I just asked an innocent question…
KS: I heard that the ex-wife haunted her home as well, but with her heard on. Er…Go with the grace of God and the Queen, amen!
The 14 People that reviewed: Thanks for being bold XD And, to the one's that wanted to draw scenes or inspiration from my fic, show me please X)
Kat: Tastel's appearance was planned to be in this fic some where ;)