Disclaimer: See previous chapters. The lyrics to and the song "Who Wants To Live Forever" both belong to Queen. The song from which the title of this chapter was taken, "The Show Must Go On," is also owned by Queen.
A/N: In the reviews I got for the last chapter, I had requests to let Amanda live. I don't want to spoil anything, but I believe you readers will be pleasantly surprised…
Chapter Twenty: The Show Must Go On
"Doctor, please, just tell me: how bad is she?"
"Your daughter has lost a lot of blood Detective Hoyt, but the bullet missed any vital organs. She's alive, but I'm afraid she's slipped into a coma from the blood loss. There's no way to know how long she'll be in the coma, but if she survives tonight, her chances of recovery will be very good."
"That was five days ago," Woody whispered into the quiet of the hospital room. "And you still aren't awake." He walked over to the hospital bed where Amanda lay sleeping. She had survived the initial gunshot wound, and the surgery to remove the bullet, but she hadn't woken from her coma yet. Woody looked around her room. It was so cold and so empty looking, even with the many bouquets of flowers filling it. The only thing remotely alive in it was his daughter, and she wasn't really alive at the moment. At least, not the kind of alive he remembered her being.
He looked around the room again, and noticed a second living thing in it. Well, a living, sleeping thing. There, in a chair next to Amanda's bed, was Peter, fast asleep and holding tightly to Amanda's hand. "He's been here every day since Amanda was admitted," Woody remembered. "The only times he's left this room have been when me or one of her siblings came, to give us some time with her. No wonder he's asleep: he's exhausted."
Woody walked over to the sleeping ME and shook his shoulder lightly. Peter woke with a start, and looked quickly around the room, as if he had forgotten where he was. He looked at the bed, and his face fell, suddenly remembering where he was and why he was there. He looked at Woody, as if to ask, "Did I miss anything?" His face fell again as Woody shook his head, telling him that nothing had changed.
"I don't know how much more I can take of this," he muttered. "She doesn't look like herself at all. She looks…She…it's like she's not even there. Like she's already dead."
"I know," Woody said quietly. "It's hard for all of us."
"I was right there. I was right there, and I couldn't do anything to stop him. I couldn't do anything to save her."
"Peter, you did what you could. Neither of you saw that guy coming. There was nothing any of us could've done to stop it. Do you think Amanda wants to hear you talk like this? Do you think she wants to hear you blame yourself for something you had no control over? You know as well as I do that she doesn't."
"I know. You know what would be happening right now if this was happening a few years ago?" Woody nodded, knowing what Peter meant: If this had been the past, he'd be reaching for drugs. He'd probably be high already.
"Knowing that there's a chance, that she's still in there somewhere…that's the only thing keeping me together right now. Amanda's the only thing stopping that from happening again. That's why I'm still here, sitting in this goddamned uncomfortable chair, waiting for her to come back…"
"You love her," Woody finished quietly. "It's obvious to everyone how much you love her. And that's what she needs right now…love, and her family and friends. You're doing a great thing Peter, and I really appreciate it."
Peter nodded his head in silent thanks. "You want some time with her?" he asked quietly. He could tell by the look on Woody's face that he did, so he stood up and started to walk out of the room.
"Hey Peter," Woody said, causing Peter to turn around again. "Get something to eat. You look like you haven't had anything to eat or drink in three days."
Peter smiled wryly. "I haven't," he said as he walked out of the room.
Woody leaned over and kissed Amanda's forehead before sitting in the now-empty chair next to her bed. He took her hand in his own and squeezed it tightly.
"Hey Bean," he said. "It's Dad. I hope you don't mind, but I sent Peter off to get something to eat. He's been here every day, you know, ever since they brought you here, so I figured he probably hadn't eaten in a while. He's really scared for you; we all are. I think he blames himself for what happened to you. He's not the only one…Justin does too, I think. He's been here almost as much as Peter. Your sisters have been here too, and so have the kids. They're staying for another week, or until you wake up, whichever comes first. Which reminds me, you probably want to know what's going on right now."
"You've been in here five days now. It's five minutes after midnight, on September 15th. In an hour, you'll be 19 years old. I remember the night you were born. It was almost exactly like this, except it was colder. Kewaunee was in the middle of its worst cold snap ever, and I was woken up at midnight by a phone call. It was your mother, calling to tell me that she was in labor. Well, you can probably imagine that my parents weren't happy about me being on the phone that late. But as soon as I told them why, they drove me down to the hospital. By the time we got to the hospital, your mom was pretty far along. They made me put on the ugliest scrubs imaginable before I could go in the room, and when I went in, it was already 12:55 a.m."
"It didn't take very long for you to be born. Before I knew it, there was a loud scream, and there you were, a beautiful baby girl. My baby girl. After the cord was cut, they wrapped you in a towel and let me hold you for the first time. There I was in a hospital, 15 years old, and I was holding my daughter. Most kids would have freaked out in that situation, but I didn't. As soon as they put you in my arms, I knew that I had something besides your mother to live for. What I did when you were older was inexcusable and selfish. If I had known then, that I would be this close to losing you, I never would've done it." Woody was so busy talking to Amanda that he didn't notice Peter standing in the doorway, quietly listening as he had been for the past 5 minutes.
"I remember your first birthday. You were wide awake at 6 in the morning and crying, and I put the radio on for you, to try and make you calm down. The song 'Who Wants To Live Forever' by Queen came on, and you laid back on the bed and waved your arms and kicked your legs and you smiled. Your mom told me that you listened to that song on your birthday every year at 6 in the morning. I can't believe that you would do something that would remind you of me. But then again, you kept the locket, so I shouldn't be surprised." Woody looked up at the clock. It was 1:05 a.m.
"Happy Birthday Amanda," he whispered. "I have something for you. You probably won't get it until you wake up, but I want you to have it anyways." Woody got up and plugged in a CD player. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a CD case. He opened it, opened the top of the CD player, and then he opened the case and put the CD into the CD player, closing the top.
"I know it's not 6 in the morning yet," he said. "But I figured that this might help you. After all, it's practically your song." Woody turned towards the door then, and finally saw Peter.
"How long have you been there?" he asked.
"Long enough to hear the story about the Queen song. I got something to eat," he said with a grin as he held up a McDonald's take-out bag. "I figured you might need something to eat, too. You look worse than I do."
"Thanks a lot," Woody said sarcastically, then he softened. "I really mean that, though. Thanks. For everything, including what you've done for Amanda. I've never seen her this happy…not even when she was a kid. So, you want to switch shifts?"
"Go eat, and then go get some sleep," Peter said, handing him the take-out bag as Woody walked out the door. "Amanda wouldn't like it if either of us were the next ones to end up in the hospital."
Peter looked at the clock. It was 4:00 a.m. He had been there for almost 3 hours, holding Amanda's hand and talking to her. He told her how everyone was doing, what had happened in the past 5 days, and how much he loved her. Mostly how much he loved her, and how much he needed her to wake up. He felt his eyelids slowly dropping, but each time, he resisted. He didn't want to go to sleep, not when Amanda needed him. He had pushed the 'Play' button on the CD player when he sat down, and Amanda's song had been playing ever since. Maybe it was the music, or maybe he was just tired. Either way, he was soon asleep, holding tight to Amanda's hand.
Amanda was tired of walking. "Where's the exit to this damned thing?" she thought. She had been walking through the maze for what felt like years, and still hadn't found the way out. Suddenly, a noise caught her ears.
There's no time for us
There's no place for us
What is this thing that builds our dreams, yet slips away from us
It was her song. The song she had listened to every year on her birthday, ever since she could remember. She turned the corner, following the sound of the music.
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever . . . . . ?
Oh ooo oh
There's no chance for us
It's all decided for us
This world has only one sweet moment set aside for us
The music was getting louder. Amanda knew she was getting closer to the source of the music.
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever
Ooh
Who dares to love forever
Oh oo woh, when love must die
She turned every corner she could, running towards the music, towards her song, and possibly towards the end of the maze. Suddenly, she was in front of a door. She knew that wherever she was, she was about to get out.
But touch my tears with your lips
Touch my world with your fingertips
Amanda grasped the doorknob of the old door and turned it. She slolwy pulled the door open, revealing a blinding flash of white light…
And we can have forever
And we can love forever
Forever is our today
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever
Forever is our today
Who waits forever anyway?
Amanda opened her eyes and looked around her. She was lying in a hospital bed, in a room full of flowers. She looked at the clock near her bed. It was 6 in the morning, and her song was playing. She looked to her left, and saw Peter sitting next to her bed in a chair, fast asleep. Amanda smiled and squeezed his hand gently.
Peter woke up immediately and looked at his hand. He saw the fingers wrapped around his, saw them squeeze his hand a second time. He looked up at the face of the girl in the bed and saw her smiling at him. He almost cried when he realized what had happened, and it took only seven words coming from her mouth to make him start:
"I did it, Peter. I held on."
A/N 2: Time for the shout-outs!
Dan: I'd never end it there! I have so many plans yet for this story, and she has to stay alive if there's gonna be a sequel! I've been known to be cruel occasionally (making you all wait that long for some new chapters, for example), but I'd never be that cruel. There's more to come, believe me.
xoRetributionox: Thanks. It was a hard thing to get through, but it DID make me a stronger person. I'm glad I had her make up with Justin too. I wish that my situation could've ended up that way (minus the whole being shot part), but some things just can't happen. I'm glad you like the story, and I hope you keep reviewing.