Merry Christmas, everyone. Sorry about not updating the new chapter more quickly but the thing is looking back on it I noticed there were a few things I wanted to change… hopefully it was for the better.

Now on with the fic.

Darkness. Although the dawn of day was approaching the fortress, one room remained untouched by the rays of the sun, deep within the underground levels of the base. The only source of light that illuminated the large room were lanterns that were hung on the walls. On each wall was a red banner that carried the four point Black Hole insignia on a white squared background. At the center of the room was a large desk. Maps, battle plans and notes of future crimes against humanity laid on top of it.

Sturm stood behind his desk looking angry and humiliated. Smog was coming out of his mask in odd places. Although concealed, his head was bandaged and his mask looked somewhat warped.

Four large mechanical infantrymen came into the room. Each had a CO within their grasp (except for Flak who was being carried by two) that vainly tried to break free. After dropping the COs unceremoniously before Sturm's desk, they saluted, extending their right arm high into the air before turning and leaving the chamber.

"How dare you throw me on the floor!?" Adder yelled at them, "You fools are dirt beneath my-."

"Silence!" bellowed Sturm, "And get on your feet!"

The three COs quickly rose to their feet and stood at attention while Sturm step in front of his desk; standing right front of them. Sturm could intimidate his fellow man with his huge and monstrous presence. He stood several feet above his COs. His form remained hidden with the dark cape he wore around his body. His head as well as the rest of his form covered in bronze armor that made him look invincible. His three COs were children compare to his size. He could easily snap each of them two. One was already half way there but that was beside the point.

Sturm had to deal with their most recent act of idiocy.

"Sir" Adder began in a causal tone, "if I ma-"

"Silence, Adder!"

Adder immediately became silent and convincingly showed lack of terror from Sturm's outburst. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he remembered a crucial fact of his predicament. His fate as well as those of his fellow COs were in the hands of madman. He spent years persuading people to see his reasoning. It was his job before Wars World's prospering economy had become a faded memory and it paid very well. Lies became truths and truths became lies but this was another one of those times where something more important than his job hanged in the balance. He would have to carefully choose the time to speak to Sturm to save them from any fate their lord had in mind.

Sturm began walking back and forth in front of the COs.

"We have taken over this land and made it our own. We have raised an army the likes of which this world has never seen. Those fools are not likely to stand by it much longer. We are weeks away from invading Wars World. Our forces are ready to crush those worms for the humiliation they made us suffer. The disarmament, the ridiculous war cost… They shall all pay for humiliating Black Hole as they did"

Sturm suddenly stopped and faced the three men. He gradually raised his voice as came to his point.

"The war will soon begin… and you three decide to take the day off and play golf on the field?!"

Hawke, Adder and Flak look each other before answering as cautiously as it was possible,

"Yes?"

Sturm seemed angered beyond imagining. He was practically blowing steam. He began breathing in deeply in an attempt to calm himself.

This isn't the first time these three have done something this idiotic and odds were it wouldn't be the last, he reasoned. Besides he need these three to fulfill his plans for Wars World. They could be dealt with afterwards.

Once he felt he had regained control he continued with his interrogation. Sturm then revealed his hand from his cape. Tightly grasped within it were three golf balls.

"Which one of you curs shot these golf balls into the base's Black Cannons?"

A moment of silence commenced before one of them finally spoke.

"… I did, boss," Flak admitted.

After another moment of silence, Hawke gave Adder a quick jab to the ribs with his elbow.

"Ow! I did too, sir," Adder said in seemingly apologetic tone while rubbing his side and glaring at Hawke.

Sturm exhaled deeply.

"Why?"

Adder and Flak looked at each other, trying to come up with a good answer. Even Adder couldn't think of a good answer quickly enough.

"Never mind. I rather not know the incompetence behind it. Now… Who shot this golf ball through the window in my office?"

All three were silent. Hawke however was beginning to sweat a bit. In hindsight, Hawke figured taking on that shot was probably not a very good idea though it did win him enough money to take care of his coffee needs for a month.

Assuming he lived to see that money.

"… I did, Lord Sturm" Hawke reluctantly replied.

Smash!

All three men slightly flinched when Sturm slammed his fist on his reinforced steel desk, instantly breaking it in two.

Sturm was livid. His second-in-command has committed an act that could have seriously harmed him if weren't for his armor. What was next, backstabbing? To make matters worst, he destroyed yet another desk. At this rate he rather as well go for a wooden table. It wouldn't cost as much to replace.

Regaining his control once more, Sturm addressed his COs,

"You three will pay dearly for your actions. You three are going to…"

Sturm stopped. This scenario has happened many times before. He was beginning to run out of punishments. He jerked his head up suddenly. A good one just came to mind.

"You three will assist Lash with her Neotank experiments," Sturm said with amusement in his voice.

Fear was on each of their faces in their unique manner. Hawke was somewhat failing to hide the disturbed look in his face. Adder seemed dead on his feet while Flak began sweating heavily. All three, however, seemed to have considered their fate one worse than death. Quickly regaining his senses Adder began to persuade Sturm of a less severe punishment.

"Sir, please reconsider" Adder requested in a groveling manner.

"Its no less than what you and Flak deserve for using her cannons as pot holes. Thanks to you two, the prototype models may be damaged. And she doesn't have time to design new ones. Your folly may very well have cost me serious advantage in the upcoming war. You rather as well pay for it now… hopefully you'll survive her experimentations"

"Lord Sturm" Adder spoke, talking in the demeanor of an entrusted confidant, "Lash's weapons are so strong mere game equipment can't possibly damage them"

"Even so, what you three did can be considered sabotage" Sturm answered back unmoved by Adder's tone.

A thought quickly entered Adder's mind. If this didn't save them, nothing would. Adder didn't doubt his ability to convince other people to see things his way. It was the fact that Sturm may see through his game that unnerved him. Nonetheless, he kept a straight poker face. Showing any fear that he was feeling would not aid him.

"But Sir. I have an idea that will benefit us both if you forgive our act of stupidity"

"Beware, Adder. Don't think I'm ignorant of your tricks. Try to deceive me and your punishment will be that much severe" Sturm threatened.

Sweat began forming on Adder's forehead. His face still seemed reasonably calm though.

"I would never dream of deceiving you, my lord" Adder replied, closing his eyes in the case they said otherwise.

Sturm seemed skeptical but he chose to allow Adder to continue.

"Lash is currently designing the new tank model, correct?"

"Get to your point. I grow tired of this mindless drivel"

"In exchange for our time… helping Lash, we will design a new Battle copter for your lordship. Think of it. One more unit in helping you retake the honor stolen from Black Hole"

Hawke and Flak were going to question Adder about what he was doing when he silently signaled them to stay quiet. Sturm quickly countered with,

"Our Battle copters models are superior as they-"

"Ones that are strong against anti-airs" Adder quickly added.

Sturm paused mid sentence.

Adder inwardly smiled and held back a sigh of relief. Not even Sturm himself was unreachable by his words. A battle copter that could withstand the fury of the Vulcan cannons would give Black Hole superiority in the skies. Furthermore, air strikes would no longer be as hindered by anti-air weaponry with such a unit in Sturm's arsenal. Sturm had to be mad to resist such an offer.

"Very well, Adder. You three can exchange your time with Lash by designing this battle copter… under a few conditions. You three must build it yourselves. You cannot use any of the personnel in the lab, you'll be assigned to, to build it"

Adder's face remained calm after this new revelation. In his mind however, he was furious. His success could now by hindered by his fellow COs. He very much doubted his colleagues knew how to built aircraft and he certainly didn't have any idea of building it. He went to law school, not technical school. Furthermore, now HE would have to actually do manual labor as well.

"It must be a manned battle copter as well"

"Sir?" Adder asked uncertainly.

"I want to see its performance under the control of a pilot. If it passes, then I have Lash make it an drone unit"

Adder resisted the urge to scowl. Now they couldn't even use the B- copters in their possession. It would have been as simple as merely modifying the machine guns and reinforcing the armor plating. To top it off they now had to fly it as well.

"Go! Build that machine if you value your well-being"

"Ok, boss"

"Yes, sir"

"As you wish, Lord Sturm"

"Fail and the three of you will assist Lash until we're ready to invade"

The three COs saluted and left Sturm's office.

"Adder, how do you plan on creating this prosperous unit?"

"Just be thankful I got us ALL out of a potential death sentence, Hawke!" Adder snapped.

"And now we're in another one, thanks to YOUR attempts at deceiving Sturm with your cunning" Hawke calmly countered.

"My ATTEMPTS as you call them, saved us from having to deal with Lash. God knows how protective that brat is of her precious 'toys'" Adder said mockingly.

"Perhaps. You still haven't answered my question. How do you plan on designing, let alone building this aircraft?"

"What fool do you take me for?"

"Uh clown one?" Flak responded.

"Moron, I was talking to Hawke. In any case, you're sadly mistaken if you think I have made an error in purposing to build this aircraft. I already have a plan"

"Hmm… we'll see" Hawke said skeptically.

Afternotes:

First, the review responses.

Keeperofthescarf; Thanks for the review. You probably would have scolded me for my first story. It was written in… (Cowers in fear behind an archfiend-ic sweihander from potential reviewer beating) script! It too was AW parody, using the Holy Grail. Looking back on it I think there were some things I should have done differently besides the format. I think I'll resurrect that story some time in the future but its going to be tough since its may be in essence a novelization of AW 2, albeit one with Holy Grail aspects. Oh sorry about misleading you into believing I already have five chapters worth of writing. I'm still writing it.

General Dredge; Thanks for the review. Looking back on that chapter, I'd say that IS one the chapter's most comical lines. Now get workin' on that next chapter to the Black Hole Bunch!

Macross-Green; I'm glad you liked it. I was really concerned about the characterization. One of the things I believe for a humor fic to be great is keeping the characterization intact. I still have my work cut out for me. The real test for keeping the characters persona intact will probably begin next chapter. That's when the aspects of the parody I have in mind actually come into play. This and the last chapter were sort of background. I explain fully once I reveal the parody or someone guesses it. Sorry Lash didn't get hurt or anything but I'll see what I can do and thanks for the review.

KrOnIk-SpOoN, Student; Thanks for the review. Yeah, I have spent TOO much time not writing anything. That will change with this story. Well you wouldn't be too happy about getting hit in the head with a golf ball either, would you?

BlackHole CO; Thanks for the review. I try to do the best I can with humor.

Foulds; Thanks for the review. Advance Wars Golf? The summary certainly implies it doesn't it? I'd sure buy that game. I mean, if they have one for Mario, why not AW as well. Sadly this story won't really be about golf as this chapter may have pointed out. It'll deal with aviation. Something these guys are not exactly skilled in (exhibit A- Flak). Sure they can command air units but as I pointed out those things are drones. And even if they weren't, soldiers who know how to fly would be piloting them. These guys would just be telling them where to go. I'll see what I can do about Homer though as it may be hinted in this chapter, I'm writing using aspects of a different historical timeline.

Now I'll state the clues I left so far about what I'm parodying. The title itself is a clue. A very comical trio used that title. The idea of building a plane to escape some type of plight is also a clue.

Read and review. And if you think you know who I'm talking about say so in a review.